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I kind of want to write one of those battle scenes where the hero character isn’t there for whatever reason and the side characters are all fighting until the hero gets back, but instead of arriving all triumphant at the eleventh hour, the hero character just has no idea what the fuck is going on.
He still fights and saves the day probably but for a solid minute, minute and a half, he is extremely confused and very much not okay.
Ren: It’s not about whether you win or lose.
Ren: Sometimes it’s about how many pages you add to the rulebook.
Ren: I can't decide whether I want to join the Bard's College or the Thieves Guild.
Yusuke: Well, then. You'll simply have to weigh the prose and cons.
Akechi: *shatters a glass*

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Ren: I attempt to seduce the orc chieftain.
Ren: *rolls a nat20*
Akechi: The orc chieftain is not interested.
Ren: But... I rolled a nat20?
Akechi: Yes, you did. And that is why she is graciously going to allow you to take your hand off her thigh.
Akechi: Instead of shattering every bone in your body.
Ren: Hm. Point taken.