rip joe bird you would’ve loved joe bird
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rip joe bird you would’ve loved joe bird

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me trying to explain the gay demons in Leviticus to my very Christian, very Chinese, moderately homophobic mom:
been only two days and my brother's already calling me levitichud
a list of truly embarrassing things i misunderstood when i watched Leviticus for the first time in the theatres lmao
-did not know ryan had a cockatoo [just saw the cage and the dang thing just blended into the background lmao] so when naim went to his house and there was suddenly that ungodly screeching going on as he approached the backyard legit just thought it was some dope ass experimental sound design i was like whoa okay adrian we getting very babadook in here with these sounds also very jurassic park this some pterodactyl shit im feeling u very unique i love it, the screeches are freaking me out great job [spent the rest of the movie waiting for the those cockatoo screeches to come back into the soundtrack bc they were mad cool, was sad when they didn’t]
-thought hunter was a demon [LMAO STAY WITH ME PLSSSSSS] —this was probably caused by the fact that i watched as little trailer or clips as possible before going bc i wanted to go in cold as they say and get the full experience lmao —so again, when it got to the scene of naim approaching the back of ryan’s house and the stone throwing started —i legit thought that was the demon already —like it was some kind of poltergeist type shit —so when naim was watching them horrified —legit i thought he went to the pastor to tell him that ryan was getting attacked by a demon and the demon was his son [im legitimately dyinggggg as im typing this i don’t know how my mind twisted it into this holy shit lmao] —it took until the actual ritual that i realized that the demons weren’t out yet lmao rip my brain gotta go back to kindergarten
-thought izzy was multiple people —idk man sometimes im really bad with faces —took a moment for me to realize she was the same person with her hair tied up when naim came in to tell the pastor about ryan and hunter and then later when she was telling them about jessica i was like damn this pastor family has a lot of kids why are there four daughters who all look like the same person [BC THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON YOU ABSOLUTE NUNCHUCK GODFUCK]
-did not realize the funeral was for hunter even after i legit saw his head ripped off in the grass in the scene right before [look before you call me mentally challenged at this point, i feel like i need to tell you i went to see this with my straight friend who absolutely hates horror movies and i was half paying attention half making sure she was okay bc she was watching 80% of the movie with her arm over her eyes okay. she gave it an 8/10 tho, so yay] thought naim was at some random funeral and had no idea why the pastor was crying and glaring at naim in an earlier scene
-completely forgot the fact that izzy and hunter were siblings two thirds of the way into the movie and was confused af when she drove naim and ryan to that abandoned back lot and those boys started beating them up i was like what in gods name is happening does she run some underground mafia or something [needed my straight friend to explain all this to me after the movie was over bc she wasnt the one who had their attention divided the whole movie lmao. look, my brain shortcircuited each time ryanaim made out okay [and it just fully flew out the window after the naim ear lick, i was in another galaxy at that point lol] i was running on hello kitty glittery battery acid im sorry]
i feel like that’s it but who knows what else i missed bc they didn’t have subtitles in the theatres and i sometimes missed whole pieces of conversation bc of their accents lmao [did any of y’all miss anything in ur first viewing or am i the only levitichud in this b]
oh hell to the fucking yeah

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it’s a shirt now:
petition to reopen joe bird so joe bird can go to joe bird and say he went to joe bird
why did i pick levitichud when leviticunt was right there, what's wrong with me lmao