Maybe death isn't that bad..
Noel Gruber has been running his whole life. Whether running from his work, running away from the bullies who had dedicated their lives bullying him or running away from Ocean since birth, he’d still run. But never would he have thought that running away from your handsome crush could be difficult.
Mischa Bachinski, Ukrainian bad boy, the angriest boy in town, the guy who had managed to land himself in St. Cassians Chamber Choir for stealing three cases of communion wine, was the reason for his little runs. However, he knows there wouldn’t be a chance of getting with him. Despite standing next to him and being the only two Tenors in the choir, the two had never really interacted. The only times they did engage in a conversation, were when Ocean lectured him or when Mischa was talking about his fiance in Ukraine, Talia.
His fiance. It hurt him physically to hear it come out of his mouth. No amount of bruises can compare to how painful it felt hearing that. The way Mischa talked about Talia was so sweet that he should’ve been given the title of “ Most Romantic Boy in town. ” instead of him.
Noel loved watching The Blue Angel and had dreamt of dressing up as Lola Lola sometimes during Halloween but fear gradually took over so, he went as C3P0. He’d imagine himself as Monique from post-war France, romanticising what should’ve been unhealthy right from the start. To be used, to be thrown away like nothing. He dreamt of it. But nothing could prepare him for the unrequited feelings. It hurt so badly that he began throwing up at the thought of him.
Mischa. Him and his stupid accent. Him and his stupid tooth-gapped smile. His smug smirk whenever he or someone else laughs at his insult towards Ocean. His dumb curly hair that was always hidden underneath that idiotic black cap. His stupid way of speaking in Ukrainian. The dumb freckles that he isn’t afraid to show, unlike Noel. He hates them all. Even worse, he wasn’t even sure if Mischa would ever notice him. He was always glued to his phone.
And finally, the fall fair. The only reason he was excited, was the Ferris Wheel. It had been his favourite ride since, forever. Occasionally, he’d hop into the bumper cars and attempt to demolish Ocean with it. Today was their competition. He was nervous but it was alright. He knows Mischa isn’t gonna sing at all, so he made sure to be a bit louder.
It went wrong. Everything was a wreck and they knew that but well, it was time for them to enjoy their time. The kids all queued for their respective rides. Mischa heading to the shooting range, Ocean checking out the bumper cars with Constance and Ricky going to the Gravitron with the new girl that joined. They finished their little rides and immediately made bets on whether they should get on the Cyclone or not.
Noel had a sense of fear staring at the rollercoaster ride. It was quite wobbly and looked unstable but it was Constance's favourite ride! How could he say no? With a huff, he agreed to get on and off they went, queuing for the ride. They asked for their fortunes a while before the ride. When they got on, he realised that he was sitting next to Mischa. Mischa was calm and Noel felt attracted to that for some reason. They braced themselves, pulled the safety bars onto their bodies and prepared for the ride. It was 6:17.
6:19 pm, the front axle of the loop-the-loop broke, causing the entire coaster to derail, killing them all and successfully slicing someone’s head off.
Which brought them to the warehouse now. They had just heard Ocean’s number and if Noel could choose to die once more, he would. Then, it was his turn.
His lament, which was more of a ballad, was about his wanting to be a French hooker back in post-war France. When he had the chance to make out with Mischa, he was confused and most obviously ecstatic. The way his lipstick was smeared and stained Mischa’s lips. When he felt the other kiss his neck, he felt himself die a little more.
His song went smoothly and he grinned when Mischa complimented his song. Ocean had an issue, Jane had spelt the word FUCK, Constance enjoyed the part where he and Mischa kissed while Ricky was glad he could play the accordion.
Then it was Mischa’s turn. He was taken aback when Mischa unbuttoned his shirt but quickly brushed it off and continued to support his now-friend. After his autotuned rap, he quickly walked away with Jane, completely forgetting about the cap on his head, only remembering when Ocean pointed it out while they change.
The next song was heart-wrenching. He sang about Talia, which brought more of his unrequited feelings back. He doesn’t even know who Talia is and he’s jealous of her, hilarious. The more he danced around with Ocean or Penny, he could feel his heart swell with sadness. Only then did he realise that Mischa was good at singing. He felt himself for more for the man he knew he would never get. When they spun around in a circle as Mischa danced in the middle, Noel could feel himself smile. He’d be happy for him, even if it meant never loving him.
“ And I would vote for Noel. The world needs more poets. ”
“ And I’ll vote for you! ” And with that, they bumped hands.
“ AND THIS IS WHY YOU BOTH SUCKED AT MATHS! ” Ocean screamed, yelling at the two of them whilst they stare at her in annoyance and confusion. As she continued to scream at them, Noel shot a small glance towards Mischa before realising that he was staring back at him.
Then it was Ricky’s turn. During one part, he pawed at Mischa’s body and while that wasn’t intentional, it made them both flustered at the movement. He laughed silently to himself afterwards.
It's Jane’s turn. He must admit, the song was amazing. Jane was so good at singing it startled both him and Ocean, being the closest next to her at the time. The way she ascended and sang while spinning was enough to shock them all. The umbrellas were a nice touch. Then they sang the birthday song. It was honestly really sweet of Ocean to create an entirely new song for Jane.
After the whole thing, Noel found himself sitting at the crate near Karnak. Mischa sat next to him, a vodka bottle in hand.
“ Where did you get that? ”
“ It’s birthday. ” It sounded a lot like borthday the way he said it but he didn’t mind, it was nice. He then let out a hum at that and drank.
“ How did you know you’re gay? ”
“ I guess it just came to me? At birth? I’ve always liked oddly romantic stuff and felt attracted to guys more often than not so, that’s how I knew. ”
“ Oh. I like men and women. What term for that again? ”
Noel smiled at that, it gave him a small sense of hope that, maybe, just maybe, he’d be interested in him. That thought was immediately shut down. Of course, Mischa wouldn’t be interested in him. Up until the accident, he never really noticed the gay kid who sang in the choir and dreamt of being a French booze-hound harlot.
“ Поете, ти така гарна, що я не знаю, що тобі сказати. ” mumbled Mischa. Mischa secretly begged Noel to not hear any of that but he wouldn’t know Ukrainian either way.
“ Did you say something, Misch? ”
“ Yea? I’m sorry was that weird-? I mean I can use Mischa for you- ”
“ I like that. Misch. Can I call you poet? ”
“ Sure. It's only fair if you give me one. ”
It was silent again, only the sounds of Jane and Ricky talking in the distance. They waited and Mischa drank a bit of his vodka.
They giggled at that but Mischa couldn’t help but listen to Noel’s sweet laughter. It was so sweet that he could get a rush from that. He felt himself blush more. When did these emotions come in? He never really noticed him, even during school. He just knew that he was the pretty guy who stood next to him in every choir practice. He glanced towards him and- Are those freckles?
“ Oh- Did my concealer rub off? ”
“ Why poet conceal? very pretty. Poet looks pretty with freckles. ”
“ It’s just another thing for me to be bullied over, what’s the point? ”
“ They’re jealous. You look very pretty. I will fight them for you. ” That made Noel laugh again, and Mischa felt proud of himself.
“ У вас дуже гарно сміється поет. ”
“ I don’t speak Ukrainian, Misch. ”
“ Yes but not Ukrainian! ”
Laughter echoed from their place and they quickly engaged in a weirdly sweet conversation, with Noel complimenting him in French while Mischa gave him sweet names in Ukrainian or Mischa telling Noel how tragic he was, making him gasp at it being the nicest stuff someone ever said to him. As he leant onto Mischa’s shoulder, Noel picked up his confidence and felt himself wanting to confess. So, with a heavy breath, he spoke.
Perfect timing, Ocean. No amount of poetry would describe the simmering hatred he bore for her right now.
It was Constance's turn. Her song was incredibly sweet to listen to and Noel enjoyed his time dancing around her. This was probably one of his favourite numbers. Everyone enjoyed themselves while Noel and Mischa were a bit tipsier than the others with the alcohol they drank, which made their dancing a bit sloppier than others.
The two eventually calmed down and the voting began. Noel had forgotten about the voting and dreaded voting.
“ Ocean O’Connell Rosenberg, you’re the chosen one to go. ”
“ What?! I thought that this was per a unanimous vote?! ”
“ I decided to go with the person with the highest grade-point average, which had turned out to be you. ”
“ If I went, it wouldn’t be fair to any of us! We’ll go back to the previous decision and vote instead. ”
It was all tied. Everyone voted on who they think is more deserving to leave. It all went back to Ocean, who in turn, started yelling at Karnak and chose Jane, whose name is revealed to be Penny. Penny Lamb.
Her life carefully flashed in front of their eyes, all five of them watching it proudly. After that, Karnak was dead. They went back to doing their stuff. Constance and Ocean finally got some rest while Ricky went to practice his accordion skills. Noel and Mischa settled down on the crates near Karnak.
“ What were you going to say before? ”
“ Oh! I uhm- ” His face was flushed now. The chances of him getting interrupted were low but Mischa had a fiancee too. It would be rude of him to just, do that to them despite being dead. He peeked towards Mischa, only to see him glancing back at him with his head tilted to the side. His heart melted instantly.
“ I wanted to say that, I liked you. Ever since you enrolled on St. Cassians. Sure, you seemed rude but you were the nicest person I’ve ever met and probably the nicest to me too. ”
“ I still love her but I will never see her again. There is space in my heart for you, Noel Gruber. ” Mischa mumbled before pulling him into a gentle kiss. He was surprised but immediately kissed him back, pulling him close so that they’d share a crate.
Maybe, just maybe, dying wasn’t that bad after all.
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GOD FORBID I EVER KNOW HOW TO WRITE HAHAHAH. I suck at writing though and this might be the first time I’ve procrastinated on a fic lmao. I’m wondering if I should post this on Ao3 since I’ve never rlly done that before. Fun fact, when I speak English, I sound like Mischa speaking English. I stumble over my words a shit ton and I speak like a weirdo.
BUT I DO HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOYED THIS SILLY WORK!! TQ FOR YOUR SUPPORT ON MY PREVIOUS POSTSS.
