#cactors

Long kept as a mistress outside to give my delusional second life some spice, I’ve decided to give this beautiful man an imaginary status in advance of “Against the Current.” He’s already settling in well, though it did take some time to clear out the funko pops and fancy costumes that were left behind when the former resident departed.

Wang Xingyue has also had to leave my harem because his various youthful pursuits in between filming conflicted with time spent in my mansion of delusion, and also because he never learned how to kiss properly no matter how many pointers he was given. I didn’t like the dirty looks everyone gave me when I went to pick him up, either. I’m not *that* old. This left his courtyard free for the addition of someone I’ve kept my eye on for a long time: Chen Xingxu. When I saw his back muscles in the promo for “Love on the Turquoise Land” I knew he needed to be a member of my household, stat, although he’s been incredibly fine since “Goodbye My Princess.” Xuxu enjoys using the ab roller Wang Xingyue forgot to take when he moved out.

Zeng Shunxi is still minding his business and being a good boy in his courtyard as you’d expect from someone with his face and pair of affectionate eyes. But the tattoos should let you know he’s not *that* good. 😏 He tolerates the heat well, too, courtesy of his southern Chinese upbringing. It’s too bad he had to be in Feud. The white wig doesn’t get a lot of playtime.

Promoting Liu Xueyi to formal concubinage gave me a free slot for another mistress. (What can I say—girl’s gotta eat. Girl’s gotta hunt). Running around with Ci Sha takes a lot of energy because he’s in really good shape, but at least he also likes eating pizza and relaxing. I have considerable expertise in both of the latter activities. His smolder is uniquely well-suited to a forbidden imaginary relationship rather than an aboveboard imaginary one.

What will 2026 hold? Will Zhang Linghe manage to tolerate everyone long enough for all of us to watch reruns of the 2026 Spring Festival Gala together, or will he use his expertise and intellect to tamper with the electrical systems and get rid of the others?

Who can say?