#bulletproof scouts

Taehyung had always considered himself to be a happy man. He had clear memories of being a happy child, with loving parents, more toys than he could ask for, an education and warm food on the table. His life kept getting better as he grew older. He had auditioned for an entertainment company and gotten accepted, he hadn’t had to go through the long years of being a trainee before he debuted. His band was doing well, more than well, they were international stars. He had fans who screamed his name and fainted when he gave them a cheeky rectangular flash of his pearly whites, and close friends whom he travelled the world with. He had even found the girl of his dreams. His life couldn’t be more perfect if he had wished it upon a star. He was living a dream. But just like in dreams, eventually one has to wake up.

His entire idyllic life came crashing down that one fated autumn day at the doctor’s office. He should have seen it coming, he should have taken the golden, dead leaves crackling under his feet as an omen, but he was Kim Taehyung, and his life was perfect, nothing could ever go wrong. You were restless, fiddling with your fingers as you waited for the doctor to come back with the results. Again, he should have noticed that something was wrong when the doctor took longer than he should have in returning to the room, but he didn’t.

The doctor walked in, gripping a white sheet of paper tightly in his hands. His face held a solemn expression but his eyes betrayed him, you could see the glimmer in them that came with bad news.

“You have cancer.” He stated as dryly as he could, but you could hear the tremble in his voice. You felt like you had just been punched in the gut, leaving you breathless.

“oh.” Is all you could say.

“It’s not terminal at the moment, but it is very far along. If we are hoping to treat it or at least buy us some time, we should start treatment immediately.” He said again, this time hesitantly.

“okay, so we start treatment now.” Taehyung exclaimed matter-of-factly. You stopped him by placing a hand on his chest, signalling that the conversation was not over.

“The problem is that you are pregnant. Almost three months along.” The doctor finally spilled the beans. You signed, now you understood his reluctance.

“I understand. Thank you” you told him curtly, and began to sit up and pick up your belongings.

Taehyung looked at you with sheer horror plastered on his face.

“What are you doing? You need to start treatment” he exclaimed, tugging on your arm, trying to pull you back. You shook your head.

“I can’t. I’m pregnant. I can’t start chemo while pregnant Tae.” You looked at his lost puppy face sweetly.

And then it dawned on him. You were pregnant, with his child, and you were going to give up your life so that baby would have a chance at having one.

He was with you the entire time. The band put their tours and events on hold, in sympathy. Tae knew his time with you was running out, fast, and he didn’t want to miss one single moment of it. He celebrated your birthday, your last one you knew, as if it were just any normal birthday. He was still in denial. He cooked for you, cleaned for you, and showed you how well he handled himself at home. At first you thought he was just being nice, that he was trying to make your last few months easier. But then you realised, he was trying to prove to you he could take care of himself and your little baby, that you could trust him.

He never missed one single appointment, holding your hand as the ultrasound technician showed you both your beautiful baby. He couldn’t hold back his tears when he found out he was going to have a beautiful baby daughter. He prayed she would look just like you. He watched your belly grow, and move with every little kick. He kissed it goodnight, spoke to your baby and even sang, hoping she would recognise his voice when she came into this world. He hoped he would be enough, he promised himself he would be enough.

You were now eight and a half months along and had spent the last month in hospital. You could hardly move, you had no energy, and were looking more sickly by the day. But he stayed with you, he slept beside you, never letting go of your hand. You were everything to him. The only reason you were still alive was your daughter. You had pushed on through sheer will, fighting the urge to give up, until she was born, until she was safe.

It had finally hit you, you were going to die. Part of you felt at peace, you would no longer be in pain, but the other half, the more vocal half, couldn’t help but feel despair at the thought that you would never see your daughter grow up.

Tae had sung you to sleep every time you woke up in discomfort, and hummed songs in your ear while you slept, which was most of the time now. Suddenly, a sharp pain on your stomach jolted you awake. You felt your water break and tried to yell for a nurse, but your voice was barely above a whisper. Tae noticed immediately and sprinted towards the hall, screaming for help. This was it. The clock was ticking its final moments.

The doctors rushed to you, they had no time to take you to a surgery room, they also knew there would be no point. Births are happy events, but there was no buzzing coming from your doctors, the was no glow, no light. You could see it in their faces, they knew what would happen soon after. They knew what was coming.

Your little girl didn’t take long to come see the world. She was eager to arrive, to make the world hers. The moment she took her first breath your eyes filled with tears. You didn’t want to say goodbye, not just yet. She didn’t cry, the doctors said she came out smiling. The midwife offered Taehyung to hold her, but he shook his head and pointed at you. She gave him a weak smile, and with tears streaming down her face, she placed the little bundle on your chest. They scurried off to give you some privacy.

You had one good look at her face, and then it all crashed. You began to sob hysterically, clinging to her. She looked just like you, but her smile, her smile was Tae’s. You memorised her features and let her curl her little fingers around your index.

“Look after her, please” you begged Tae. You could feel your vision begin to fade. He nodded, tears racing down his cheeks.

“make sure she eats, and make sure she has friends and does her homework. And protect her from heartbreak. Help her find the right man, a man like you. Read to her, and sing to her. Let her know she is loved every day.” You continued listing all the instructions you could come up with, you could tell your time was almost up.

“I promise” he said with a quivering voice.

“and tell her mommy loved her very much” you begged him, your eyes now barely able to see him.

“I will, i will tell her all about you, about us. I will never marry again, I will never let another woman take your place.” He promised you, clasping your hand tightly. You could no longer see him, or feel your hands.

“I love you Tae” you whispered, eyelids growing heavy.

❝ jeon somi and kim taehyung #taemi | light brown/beige moodboard ❞  

can we just talk about how grown up the maknae line is now or can we not

aaa 🏆best icon 🏆best artist award

mma 🏆top 10 artist 🏆album of the year

mama 🏆best dance 🏆artist of the year

gda 🏆bonsang 🏆global artist