#bright50

One thing that is haunting me more than anything about the magnanimous Episode 50 of The Bright Sessions is how Mark imagines Joan. Because I was so crushed with him to hear her tone turn so dark in his dream. Haven’t we all felt that soul-deep fear that our loved ones don’t love us the way we need, the way we want?

But what got me was listening to it again (and again). Her tone DOESN’T really change! All of the snarky things she says earlier in the dream sound the same as her later tone, but it comes across as playful and affectionate zinging. That’s a real part of their relationship, which is fine, and he deflects it with humor in reality. But if you listen carefully, her tone DOES NOT CHANGE. It’s just that there’s no pretense anymore. It no longer reads as playful, the venom is revealed. 

So in every conversation where they have their loving jabs at one another, is Mark actually hearing (and fearing) that she means what she says? That Sam can do better? That he’s out of place? 

Thank you so much!!!!!! My actors really are incredible - I’m so lucky to have them and that they’re always down for my wacky ideas. 

We need to talk about “To See What I See”, you guys. 

When I listened to it the first time, my heart swelled. The music is so surreal, it lifted my soul out of my body, and I could see it all in my mind. It’s such a joyful, adoring ode to a secret world Rose gets to inhabit. You hear the words, but mostly you hear the tone; this is her happy place. Frankly, the first 10 or so times I heard it, I felt only the swell of love and safety in that place, singing joyfully along.

But the words tell quite a different story than the music. The tone is all how Rose feels about this gift, but the words betray the truth of how dark this really is/can be:

“I go into someone’s head

When they’re lying in their bed

I come in soft.

They don’t know that I am there

I simply sit and stare

And learn their hearts.

But if I see that someone’s lost,

I try to help no matter what the cost!

I change their dreams,

And then it seems 

I can make, I can make them new thoughts.”

Guys? Can we talk about how DISTURBING that is?!? Just read the words without the uplifting tone, without hearing the Rose-tinted intention. And in the third chorus, she switches from saying “in to a world that’s unpredictable” to saying “when the world gets too predictable”, admitting that she is addicted to the high and excitement and often needs a fix. The thrill of violating this private place, the rush of having this control to “know things [she] shouldn’t know”, it “pulls her in”.

This may be why Agent Green’s reprise is a very-close second for my favorite song; that goosebump-inducing slip into minor key shows the true nature of her use of this power; it’s invasive and she doesn’t have the self-control she thought she had gained from her time at the AM.

“You go where no one ever goes

And you think you know what lies within.”

[R] “I just wanted to know that I can trust them.”

[G] “All you’ve done is prove they can’t trust you.”

[R] “No, that wasn’t my aim-”

[G] “You think all that matter is your goal

But music bares the soul,

And their minds are not a game!

And I marvel at how far you’ve gone down this path!