#bpdblogging

sum1: is absent from my life without explanation/communication, is visibly interacting w/ mutuals while ignoring me, is overall just trigger city but also might not know it because sometimes people just don’t get to know me as a person and learn my basic needs?

me: (doesn't have someone i'm talking to All The Time, Every Day)

god this is worse than ali because i thought we were okay i thought we reached a compromise ali, i could feel her slipping away easily, i could see it coming (and we were never romantically involved, she was just my fp) but i thought this was gonna work i thought it would i thought because we could talk through things, it would be okay, we could work through our struggles we talked about the future like we could make it, like we were GOING to make it i thought we were gonna make it i would’ve done anything anything i was considering a change in career plans to make our wants mesh better together i would’ve done that i would’ve moved cross country i thought we would make it i swear to god i thought we could be forever, i wanted that so bad there were things that didn’t work but we couldve worked on them, i know we could it couldve worked i did everything i could i gave so much of myself i put in so much heart, so much effort, i exhausted myself i flew across the fucking country and went into debt i put my own bullshit away to be able to be there for him until i physically couldn’t anymore i gave and gave and gave