#borte

Houlun came up behind her just as Nesryn chuckled, a sound that, to this day, made his heart flutter, and began unbuckling herself from her saddle, making him do that same. “At least let them put their feet to the ground, child.”

“You can hardly blame me, they kept us waiting this long.”

His wife dismounted, graceful as a dancer, “You didn’t see the fight we put up just to come here,” she said as a way of explaining as she gave them both a swift but tight hug before making her way over to him. 

“What, did they think the Ruks would eat her,” Borte snorted.

“I was sure they were going to lock her away from us by the end,” he mused as he carefully handed the sleeping babe over to Nesryn before dismounting himself, just as Houlun and Borte came around Nesyn. The babe, their little Ayla, only made a small sound that he was sure was a grumble before resting her head on her mother's shoulder, her arms lightly wrapped around her neck, completely at peace as she slept.

She’d fallen asleep on the flight over. A flight that may not have happened had he not argued endlessly with his family first, then reassured Nesryn over and over that it was safe enough to bring the babe to the Rukhin. 

She tried to argue against it, but he’d seen how much she had needed it. How tired she was, of everything. 

They’d been married three years now, and though they hadn’t talked about children, Ayla had been a surprise, but not an unwelcome one, not at all. Sartaq’s overwhelming joy aside, he’d never seen Nesryn so…happy before. Or happier than she had been. He saw it, since finding out they were having the babe, which nearly took the knees out from under him, to the hard pregnancy in which he’d never seen her so tired, exhausted, to the moment they placed the screaming little girl in her arms. Through it all, she’d had this joy that made him fall in love with her over and over again, each time he saw her.

But the past six months had been tiring. For both of them.

For him, with his responsibilities as Heir, and with taking care of a newborn with many sleepless nights alongside his wife. And for her. Though she never said anything, never complained, but he saw it. Both mother and daughter were attached, so much so that Ayla would get cranky or cry if Nesryn so much as put her down, not that the babe cried often. And Nesryn was just as protective of their little one, but when it came to her duties, it was difficult. 

And as much help as she had with his and her own family, he saw how uncomfortable it made her, how she didn’t seem to like handing their daughter over all day for someone else to handle. It didn’t help that due to the families, there was always someone wanting to hold the child, especially when he and his wife were alone. He’d take in the flash of annoyance on her face, the slight twitches of her hand. And though they both appreciated the help, it got rather… stifling. Suffocating. 

So when he had suggested they finally come to the Rukhin, the relief that had flooded her face, despite her worries, had him arranging for them to leave as soon as they were able. There had been protests, but there was not much they could do to stop them now was there. 

And he saw it now, he was right to bring them here. It seemed as though a weight had been lifted off of Nesryns shoulders, how much more relaxed she looked here than back in Antica. 

“ I would have liked to see them try,” Borte said, as she lightly stroked Ayla’s cheeks, “I was one more week away from coming down there myself. Oh, she’s adorable.” A smirk as she glanced at the two of them, “Thankfully she looks like her mother. It would have been unfortunate if she poor thing took after Sartaq.” 

Nesryn laughed, to which he gave her a teasing glance before being pulled into an embrace by his hearth mother, alongside words of congratulations before pulling away. 

“You two seem like you’ve seen better days,” she said as she looked them over.

“Of rest,” Nesryn muttered. Houlun chuckled. Borte made to say something but was cut off with a sharp glance from her grandmother. 

“Go on, sleep. We can talk in the morning.”

…

Nesryn didn’t know who was nice enough to have a crib placed in their room and she wasn’t going to ask around tonight anyway. She carefully laid Ayla down, tucking her in as gently as possible to not jostle her. 

She wanted at least a few hours of sleep tonight, especially after the long flight here. It wasn’t that her daughter cried a lot, the problem was that when she and Sartaq had to attend to their duties, they had no choice but to have someone else look after her, much to her dismay. Even more so when they had her sleep through the day, making her wide awake at night. And the two of them having to stay awake with her, until she eventually falls asleep with only a few hours for them to sleep through.

To be fair, as much as the two were attached to one another, her Ayla tended to be cranky when she was out of her arms, eventually leading her to cry. So the only thing for anyone to do to calm her was to put her to sleep. It didn’t sit right with her, broke her heart each time her little one reached for her. 

She never complained though. Not even to Sartaq, who she knew felt the same pain each time just as she did, if only because he had enough to worry about as is, but also because he stayed awake with her every night, even when she insisted he could sleep. At one point he just said, “I won’t be the father who sleeps peacefully while my wife stays awake every night. You too are my heart, I can’t rest until you both are.” And that had been the end of it, and so they stayed awake, and she enjoyed those moments the three of them spent together, just them in the quiet of the night. But all of it was certainly taking a toll on both of them, she hadn’t dared to say anything. 

But when Sartaq had suggested coming here, she hadn't put up too big of a fight. At the very least, she didn’t have to consistently worry and be on her feet. She was hoping they could spend some time together, without the constant weight of having to attend to their duties every few minutes. 

She sighed just as the door opened, “Here’s to hoping she sleeps through the night,” she said as she turned to Sartaq. 

He chuckled, the sound making her chest flutter, even after all these years. “She was awake most of the day ride here, I think she just might,” he said as he wrapped his arms around her.

She closed her eyes, resting her head on his chest as she returned the embrace. She felt him lose a breath, one hand stroking down her back, the other on the back of her head, placing a kiss at the top of her head. She leaned further into him, his hair wet from the bath he’d taken, likely as quickly as possible. 

She wanted to stay this way forever. This quiet, peaceful kind of moment. Just them. In each other's arms. 

“Sometimes I feel terrible,” he murmured into her hair, “For bringing all this upon you.” Another kiss. “This life and duties you never wanted.”

She pulled away enough to look into his eyes. “I knew what I getting myself into,” she whispered, bringing a hand up to cup his cheek. He leaned into it. “I knew what was expected, that things like this would happen. But I didn’t mind it, I still don’t.” 

She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to rest his forehead to hers, “I don’t mind any of it, not as long as I have you at the end of it.”

He closed his eyes, eyes she’d gotten lost in so, so many times. “You’ll have me,” he murmured, lips grazing hers, “For as long as you wish. I could deny you nothing, Nesryn.”

She smiled at that, stealing a kiss. “If I remember correctly, you were the one who was rather insistent-”

He cut her off, crashing his lips to hers. She closed her eyes, returning the gesture in kind. Gods, she would have him forever, could never get tired of it. Of the press of his chest against hers as he pulled her tighter against him, the hand tangling itself in her hair, holding her ever so close to him. She let out a little moan, which only encouraged him further, not that she complained. 

His tongue had just grazed hers when a little whine had them instantly pulling away, necks snapping as they turned to the crib. They didn’t dare breathe too loud, but Ayla only twisted a little before settling down once again. 

She turned to Sartaq just as he did before smiling, laughing, albeit a quietly as they could. She buried her face in his neck, trying to stifle her laugh, he buried his face in her hair as he tried to do the same, his chest shaking from the effort.  

Eventually, they calmed down enough. He pressed a kiss to her hair and said quietly, “Best to go clean up while she is still asleep.”

She snorted, looking up at him, “ You make it sound like she’s going to wake up any second.”

He smiled, giving her one last kiss, she’ll never get tired of it, before pulling away. “I’ll look after her if she does. Now go.

She frowned. “That's not what-”

“Shh, I said I’ll do it, my love.”

“You are just as tired as I am,” she argued. 

He only smiled, as if it was a joke. It was infuriating, she thought as he gently nudged her. She sighed, not in the mood to argue this over. At least not at the moment.

…

 Nesryn awoke to soft hands on her face, and a sound that sounded suspiciously close to “ma.”

Ever so slowly, she opened her eyes to find an identical pair of dark brown eyes on her with a smile that could’ve melted the coldest of hearts, the one that turned into a laugh. She couldn’t help her smile at the sight, even more so at the laugh that sounded from the other side of the bed, behind the babe. 

“Look who's finally awake,” Sartaq teased. Nesryn looked over Ayla to find Sartaq leaning on his side on the bed, both dressed for the day, it seemed. 

Nesryn could care less at the moment, not when she finally felt rested after so long. Funny how good one slept knowing they didn’t need to be awake as the sun rises. Though she had woken up once at night, only because Ayla was hungry, after which she went right back to sleep. She was sure she slept in, and would likely get teased by Borte relentlessly, but Nesryn couldn’t find in her to care. 

She stretched out her arms, awake, but not as willing to leave the warmth of the bed, so she wrapped her arms around her babe, who let out those addictingly adorable giggles, and let herself be wrapped in her arms. 

Nesryn pulled her in close, breathing in the baby's soft scent she couldn’t get tired of. Ayla didn’t seem to mind either, she lay content in her arms, head on her chest, and let out that sound that sounded like “ma” again. She knew she would start making those little sounds around now, alongside the little jousts of crawling. She has enough nieces and nephews to know that. 

Even so, she looked over at her husband when she did see it, a smug look on her face. 

He only gave a mock sigh before moving to wrap his arms under her, pulling them both into his embrace in blissful comfort. “I try not to get jealous of that,” he said, feigning hurt. 

She laughed, her voice still raspy from just waking up, and kissed her daughter's hair. “I think your da’s jealous, Ayla,” she mocks whispered. Sartaq pinched her side, making her laugh. 

“How long has she been awake,” Nesryn asked as Ayla sat up on her lap, babbling and grabbing at anything at arm's length.

“I told you I’d take her if she did, don’t worry about it.” Frowning, she glanced up at him but he cut her off before she could say anything. “You were rather deep in sleep, love. The fact that I got her up and ready without you so much as moving was enough.”

She waited for the rush of guilt, but it didn’t come. Maybe because she had wanted that sleep, or she wasn’t fully awake enough to feel anything yet. 

She sighed. “How long did I sleep in?” She was afraid, not really to hear it. 

“It’s a little past noon. Oh, everyone already came and went after meeting her out in the great hall,” he explained, stroking Ayla’s hair, making her pause and look up at him, giving him a toothless little smile before continuing in her little world. 

They smiled at that before he continued. “I know you hate the passing-her-around, so I thought having it done and over with. Also, the teasing is only reserved for me it seems, since no one seems inclined to give you a tough time for sleepin' in.”

She couldn’t help her laugh at that. She felt good about that, maybe even smug, considering the stories he had told her about how relentless the Rukhin had been with him. 

Sartaq tried to act annoyed, but he couldn’t hide the amusement on his, or the smile.

Ayla had no idea what was happening but laughed all the same. Nesryn grabbed her under the arms, lifting her and bringing her down to blow kisses on her cheeks, making her laugh and squirm, the sound making her heart soar in her chest. 

…

“She didn’t fuss much earlier did she?” she asked after changing, standing in front of the vanity as she braided her hair. 

Sartaq, on the bed with Ayla, a picture book open in front of her, said, “No. I think she was more focused on the cap she kept trying to take off.” An amused look at that, “I don’t think she liked being this bundled up.”

She snorted a laugh. “She’ll get used to it. But-”

There was a knock on the door then, and opened without waiting for an answer. Borte smirked at her, “You think you can join us for lunch this time.”

“I was debating a nap just now,” Nesryn said, finishing her braid. Her hair was longer now, past her shoulders, which surprisingly she didn’t seem to mind. 

“Well,” Borte said, sitting down next to Ayla, who looked up at her, curious, “If you're so inclined, but just give this one too us.”

“I think you have your husband for that,” Sartaq teased. 

A snort. “As if the bastard is good for anything.”

Nesryn and Sartaq shared a look that Borte chose to ignore. She never understood how these two worked, only that they did, in their own weird way. Honestly, she'd stopped trying to keep up with them. If only because everything they did changed every other day, after saying something completely different the before. 

“But I still think you could've brought her over sooner,” Borte started. A pointed glance at her as she came towards them, Sartaq sitting up. “You haven't been back in over a year. Instead this one kept coming and going.” 

Sartaq laughed. “Just say you missed me, Borte. I won't tell.” He grinned, then reached out an arm, grabbing her by the waist and pulling her closer to him.

A snort, which made Ayla let out a little laugh. Borte looked over and smiled at her. “As if,” she said, “but just so you both know, I'm holding you accountable for the glares and badgering my dear grandmother is sure to give me.”

“Won't you listen to her,” Nesryn teased her, moving to pick her daughter, who had started to crawl towards her, or was trying to,  the picture book forgotten and shoved to the side, gave her a laugh, the smile on her face contagious as she wrapped her arms as best as she could around her. “I think Ayla wants a friend, don't you, love,” she said, tickling her little cheek, making her giggle as she squirmed in her arms. 

“I think she has plenty back in her little palace.”

Sartaq grinned, “Not one here.” 

The pillow on his face came so fast she didn't even see it, followed by a humph before she got up and left, leaving her and Sartaq laughing. 

She only peaked back inside to say, “Oh just so you're aware, the other clans would be dying to meet their captains child. Better get to it.”

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