#blaaaahhhh

Just feeling a little badly about it, thinking I could have delivered it a little better.

Ugh why is medical transitioning so damn binary? like i really want bottom surgery but there is a huge list of concerns and changes away from the cis ideal of a “perfect” vulva that i would want. I feel like i will never find a surgeon that would actually talk to me about this let alone actually change the standard surgery for me. Like i could give two shits about depth, like 4/5 inches, less is fine for me if that/s what it takes to get all the other stuff the way i want it. I want real fucking labia not what porn and straight people think of as “normal”. where the fuck is my internal genitalia? i want the rest of the clitoris not just the glans, and speaking of the glans, i want a larger visible clitoris cause thats what feels neutral and right for me. there is a huge mountain to bottom surgery already but my nonbinaryness and and want of actual anatomy makes it seem so much higher.

9/12/17 - 8:50pm Study, study, study! Honestly though, I'm so tired and this stuff is so hard to understand. It's the 4th week of school and procrastination is already setting in but I'm trying hard to fight it. I'm actually pretty proud of how well I've been doing so far! Listening to: Perfect Concentration on Spotify

marina, natalya, sofia, anna / anya, dasha, irine, lilian, lydia, nina, iskra, roza, adeline, teresa, daria, yelena .. . just a few to throw out there :D !!!