#bicker

When you first moved into the Spring Court with Feyre, you had quickly found issues with Lucien whilst Feyre was facing her own issues with Tamlin. Feyre claimed that you and Lucien were too alike, both using sarcasm and humour to ignore the situations you were both in. It seemed to be that whenever you were in the same room, you bickered uncontrollably resulting in your respective best friends trying to keep you apart or make sure that no attempted murder would occur between the two of you.

Little did they know that your fear of faeries that had been engrained in you since your birth as a mortal, had quickly been alleviated, at least when it involved the redheaded fae you had somehow made your enemy. You knew that if he wanted you dead, it wouldn’t take more than a second to kill you, but you knew that he didn’t hate humans, nor specifically you enough to do that. It took a while to become evident, but you realised that you liked him, more than you liked someone as a friend, more than you had liked anyone before. You couldn’t admit that though, you couldn’t do anything about how you felt when your worlds were so far apart, and it could completely ruin everything that Feyre was building with Tamlin and your lives within Prythian.

You did your best to keep up the bickering, keep the wall of sarcasm and insults between you to stop you from getting hurt, to stop you from facing the facts. You never thought that you would be able to face anything that you felt, not until you ended up Under the Mountain where nothing was certain. As soon as you joined Feyre in an attempt to save everyone, you were almost certain that you weren’t ever going to leave but now that you were free, now that you were out of it, you had to face everything that you had tried to keep buried down.

Everyone was making their ways back to their respective courts; tired, tearful and broken, but free and that was what everyone tried to focus on. You were amongst the Spring Court, happy that Feyre was revived, that she succeeded at her plan to save Tamlin, to save everyone and if she was brave enough to do that, you were brave enough to talk to Lucien.

“Can I speak with you?” You croaked, trying to not lose your nerve.

He cocked an eyebrow at you. It was unprecedented for you to be pleasant to him although nothing was expected anymore, not when everyone had accepted that death was imminent under Amarantha’s reign.

Lucien nodded his head.

“Being around faeries makes my mortality rather evident but after everything that has happened, it’s become clearer than ever that there might not be a tomorrow, that another tyrant could kill us all at a whim,” you explained. “So, I’ve realised that there is no reason to hide anything anymore, no reason to not be myself or true to what I feel as I don’t want to regret my decisions. Well… I mean I’m really sorry for being an arsehole to you.”

“I was arguably worse,” he stated.

“I cannot disagree with that, but I didn’t really know how else to treat you because… because I have never felt like that about anyone before.”

“I’m not certain if I follow.”

You let out a sigh, not enjoying the fact that you had to face how you felt.

“I was only trying to hide my feelings. I thought… if I was an arsehole to you, it would help me get over you.”

A smirk curled onto his lips as you scrambled for the right words to express everything that had been going on within your head.

“Why did you think that would work?”

You shrugged your shoulders. “No bloody clue. I just needed to tell you that I like you… a lot and I tried to keep it quiet as I know I’m just a human bother, but when I thought, you were going to die… I’ve never been so scared or felt so much pain.”

Lucien held out a hand to you. You hesitated before resting your palm against his. He raised your hand to press a soft kiss to it.