Updated my desktop theme.
seen from China

seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from China

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Canada

seen from United States

seen from Germany
seen from Albania

seen from Russia

seen from Germany
seen from Yemen

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from South Africa
seen from United States
seen from Spain
Updated my desktop theme.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
Mint : D
omg same š
Bucky/Clint holding hands for the first time š
āAre you holding my hand?ā Bucky asks suddenly, and Clint flushes furiously and jerks his hand as far away from Buckyās as he can.
Which isnāt very far, because theyāre handcuffed together, which is awkward considering they barely know each other, and inconvenient because theyāre running through the snowy countryside trying to escape a particularly disgruntled Hydra cell, but Clint just thought it would be easier to stay in sync with their hands clasped, and it was instinctive more than anything, and--
āI didnāt say you had to stop,ā Bucky says.
three sentence fic
@beyoursledgehammerĀ replied to your post āhey ppl, who am i to you?ā
Uhhhhhhhh youāre funny also Sterek in the way back but now here because you seem cool?
i think you mean youāre coolĀ
HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY PENNY!!!!
thank u!!!

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
replies and asks and such
beyoursledgehammer replied to your post āreplying to replies about not looking for more fandoms to be inā
also anon's ask sounded like 'please watch this and write fic for it'
It did, rather, which in my book is sort of a rude thing to say but I am perfectly aware that to many fannish people this would be a compliment. Itās hard, when one is in a bad mental space (as, oh boy, I sure am-- I just found out on my way out the door after 10 hours on the clock at work today that I havenāt been getting paid for the few hours my job has taken me back, either-- I worked 12 hours 4 weeks ago, and 18 hours 2 weeks ago, and none of those generated any kind of paycheck, so now I have to do battle with my employer as well as the DOL people and sweet Christ I was so looking forward to actually earning some money for the first time since March and now I have another fight to fight and Iām going to have to use a phone and articulate my needs and advocate for myself and I just would like to curl up under a table and fucking cry instead of any of that, and I would just say I wonāt come in until they sort it out but they donāt need me so whatever. I have no leverage in this, I never have; theyāre still paying me minimum after eleven years so to assume that they value me would be to severely misstate the matter. So to say Iām in a bad mental space is probably seriously underselling it) not to take that as a sort of imposition, or even an attack-- a normal person would have no problem seeing that as a sweet, flattering invitation, why canāt I just watch a simple fucking TV show or whatever it is, God, but itās a bit of a stretch to assume bad intentions there so Iām really really really trying to focus on being polite and respectful in my answer, because probably this person isnāt just treating me like a fic machine and poking me until good words fall out, but itās real hard, at the moment, because I am a fucking wreck and thatās sure what it felt like to me. Which, anyway, that was not very composed or clever of me and I should stop there!
I am going to insist that surely anon did not mean it in a gross or demanding way and the part of my jerkbrain that is seeing it that way is just being a jerk.
<small>but also, like, plz donāt do that. donāt ask me to write things. if i have not been talking about a fandom plz donāt ask me to get into it. I get that people like that but I donāt. Like that. Itās not how my brain works. It just feels like another reminder that I am not a normal person and wonāt ever be.</small>
lazaefair replied to your post āreplying to replies about not looking for more fandoms to be inā
<3 <3 How are the mammoths coming along, by the way?
I wrote that whole bunch of it last year (oh lord, it was only last year. Most of itās under f-lock but the intro and some of the beginning is publicly readable here, for anyone who hasnāt seen it) and then petered out because not super many people were reading it and also I realized I suck at plots, and then I was revising it with some input from a friend but then neither of us really had time, so I set it aside and now when I look at it, all I can see is how it didnāt really work as a plot and so all Iāve really got is some worldbuilding, and a bunch of scenes I donāt like. Very frustrating and sad. I donāt know where to start, to get back to it.
mikkeneko asked āGod that's a mood. I don't understand how people can watch a new...ā
God that's a mood. I don't understand how people can watch a new series every week. I need room to get emotionally invested!
Yeah Iāve had a few messages to that effect. Iām glad Iām not the only freak--Ā Iām not interested in just watching something to pass the time, I only really want to read or watch something Iām going to get fully invested in, but thatās such a huge commitment that I can only manage it once in a--
!!!!! oh my god Iām demisexual for media thatās what it is
itās just like how I canāt get into people unless itās going to be a whole thing and most of the time thereās just not that connection so thereās no way Iām gonna. Well, anyway, it turns out that for me thatās not a sexual thing thatās my whole me, Iām not interested in something unless Iām going to basically marry it, and the thought of dating something else while still married to the previous thing goes beyond unappealing into just plain alien. Like, just, how??? like Iām already eating a steak, why would I put an ice cream sundae also into my mouth at the same time, itās not a perfect metaphor but it has the same total lack of moral judgement I intend here-- itās not that I donāt love steaks in an abiding fashion, and honestly I actually love ice cream sundaes even more than steaks, but if Iām in the middle of eating a steak Iām not going to order? dessert? and also start eating it? like right in the middle of dinner? Iām already eating, I only have one mouth? Why would I do this? How would I do this???????????
Obviously it does not work this way for most people but thatās super super how it works for me.
astroloquacious replied to your post āreplying to replies about not looking for more fandoms to be inā
I would personally love to get to know some of your original fic stuff.
I wish I had the wherewithal to scratch some out now, honestly, because I also want to be writing it but I am currently in the midst of this Witcher steak but a few people have been kind enough to be interested, and I want to post some but I currently hate everything original Iāve ever written, alas. I made the mistake of trying to reread the novella I was working on in, oh god, January, which Iād gone so far as to have some people beta-read before I decided it was... not... good. (Itās not freestanding, is the problem, itās the prequel to a thing, and I thought, well, Iāll write the prequel, but it doesnāt make sense without the thing, in defiance of my fond hopes, so, Iām sort of stuck again.)
Oh gosh I was working on it in January. Of this year?? It seems like a thousand years ago. Well, hereās a scene from that novella, in which the prequelās narrator gives us a little rundown of exactly who Our Protagonist really is.
(Ha, I found a description of him in another entry about this. I was calling the protagonist Paladin Guy, because when I first wrote the main novel thing I didnāt know what a paladin was but he definitely was one. Hereās how I described him:
And while Paladin Guy is, like all paladins, a little bit of a dumbassā pure of heart, pert of buttocks, bright of eye, holy of spirit, dumb of ass (I wouldnāt call him exactly home of sexual, itās complicated)ā heās not a complete moron, heās got to be smart about some things.
I should close these parentheses.)
Oh my gosh, in one of the entries in the tag about that novella Iām talking about how Iāve just seen the first couple episodes of the Witcher. It was that recently that I was working on it. Fuck. Wow. Ugh.
Maybe I can bear to reread this novella now, IDK. it would be a nice distraction from the current Bad State of everything in my life, but Iām also worried that if I hate it Iāll be super sad. Well, whatever.
HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY ššššš
thank you so so much
Did you get all your messed up word docs fixed??
I did not figure out why it had happened but yes! Technically! I realized that the 0kb documents were actually... copies? Of documents that existed elsewhere on the drive. So I donāt know that anything was really lost, though I didnāt check all of them and realized most of them were not documents I cared too much about anyway. I did buy a second external hard drive and copied all the important stuff to that so I at least have documents in two places.