while I've heard really good arguments for why she would do better as a circle mage, I definitely lean warden for her
of course, the key thing is that both options are bad ones. her arc, is she survives, is always going to end in a kind of layered tragedy
circle:
the biggest issue I see with the circle is the fact that bethany was in combat for so long. being in sustained danger, being in combat, can create a reactivity. if a templar grabs her, even innocuously, she might react - and that might lead to her being killed or made tranquil
another big issue is that she may be punished in lieu of hawke, particularly if hawke sided with the mages
essentially, bethany is deeply vulnerable as a circle mage, the very act of defending herself a crime punishable by death or tranquility, and may be used as a bargaining chip/threat/punishment for her sibling. she has absolutely no recourse in this situation besides playing The Good Girl and hoping it works... and that it keeps working
she's also going to live with constant guilt. bc hawke is still out there. everyone she cares about is still out there. while she's... here. fed. has a bed. educated
she knows how to help, and she's forbidden from helping. she has to sit back and wonder if the only surviving member of her family will be killed; and, if so, if her presence would have prevented it
i think that this is a unique misery, one that she has no real distraction from, no real way to alleviate. it is a helpless mystery, with her family put on the line to protect her while she's safe ("safe")
but, she's bethany. everyone did everything for her, and she never felt right being anything other than small and grateful
wardens:
in the wardens, her reactivity will not be punished. in fact, it will be understood, familiar, and it's entirely possible that some of her fellow wardens will be able to help her navigate it
in many ways, it will be terrible. she will be fighting darkspawn. she will be losing people. there's no gentling that
but i think the ability to take action, to be in control of her own life, her own fate, and to not have to hide - because with the wardens, she wouldn't have to hide her magic, wouldn't have to make herself appear weaker than she is, lest she be seen as a threat - would be cathartic
and i do feel that over time she'd grow close with some of her fellow wardens, and be able to have a familiar sort of dynamic of fighting at the side of someone she trusts
to the wardens - as an organization, i mean - she's just another tool. she's not special for being hawke's sister. they've had kings and queens in their ranks, they've had prisoners and murderers, they've had cruel and kind people, they've had and have all sorts. and we've never seen the wardens use any one member as a bargaining chip. at the level of the organization, bethany is already dead, in a way; the same way all the wardens are already dead. killing her to punish hawke would not only be useless, it would be an actively bad idea, as there are never enough wardens and always too many darkspawn, and bethany is a deeply capable mage
and i think bethany would take some solace in the fact that she is fighting smth "truly" evil (in her view, at least; i have more complex thoughts about darkspawn, but y'know) and helping the world. she's not having to hide, she's not having to make herself small and palatable, she can be exactly who she wants to be without reservation, and she can help protect people - this, from the woman who spent her entire childhood being protected and seeing how that hurt her family
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this is not: condoning/justifying anything any character has done OR saying a certain path is the "right" one, etc.
and also: it's been many years since i've played, and these are just opinions; i am not trying to present "objective" interpretations
anders:
so much of da2 is anders finding himself, finding a balance between him and justice. in daa he was all over the place, hectic, very possibly manic and i mean that literally. he's finally free! and has no idea wtf to do with that! and he's really NOT free because now he's a warden!
so in da2, he's able to be more free, although still on the run. but in his eyes, this is the most free he's been since before he was taken to a circle. and he's finding his core, who he is outside of the mage who is always trying to escape, and it is... horrible. extremely taxing. as hard as it was before, things were straightforward; now it's all open-ended and he has to make his own determinations about the shape of his life. and he chooses to support his fellow mages and fight for freedom, a degree and intensity of activism that is immensely taxing and exhausting
aveline:
i love her, but woof. she's so fucked. she's loyal - very possibly to a fault - particularly to hawke, in a way that could honestly be called trauma bonding, considering the way they met. but (and correct me if i'm wrong on either of these points!) she 1) refuses to let carver join the guard, taking away one of his few job opportunities. this is part of the reason he's willing to join the templars; because it's just about the only thing left available to him, someone who's experience seems to be mostly "i can fight"; and 2) she refuses to use any of her power within the guard to protect fenris, a runaway elven slave. like she's brutal in her strict adherence to the rule of law... but she's willing to bend it for hawke, and for hawke alone
bethany:
now, i see bethany as being really... repressed. by necessity! if you can travel with her, then hawke is not a mage, which means that bethany and their father are the only mages in the family. once malcolm dies, bethany is the only mage. and the weight of that, of being the sole reason your family is always looking over their shoulder, of being the one everyone needs to protect even though you're powerful, of being sheltered, hushed, made quiet, made small, so as to not get taken away...
it would wear on her. it would wear on anyone. and it damages her relationships with her family. i can't quite figure leandra out, and hawke is up for interpretation, but it does seem that carver in particular views her as a burden. not exclusively, not at all! he loves her! but she is the reason he lives the life he does; she is the reason their whole family lives the life they do. and she's not naive, she'd know that
i think she has a lot of anger. a lot of bottled up rage. but she has to keep everything close to her chest. always.
in the circle, i think she is forced more and more into that Good Little Mage concept. her sense of self defined in a very narrow way, one that she cannot expand from. she's surrounded by the people she'd grown up fearing - templars - and by the mages who honestly probably resent her, having had her freedom - or "freedom" - for as long as she did. and especially loyalist mages, they'd view her as a deeply uncomfortable and distressing exception to their worldview, that mages do need to be kept apart, that they should be controlled, that the rest of the world does need to be protected from them...
then in comes this girl and she's been living in the world this whole time and she wasn't killed for it, wasn't destroyed for it, and she has a strong handle on her magic despite no "formal" training
as a warden, she's obviously going to struggle. all wardens struggle. she'd face absolutely terrible things. but she'd be fighting, as she has been fighting the whole time she's in kirkwall with hawke, and if she reacted that way in the circle, even once, even under duress, she could be killed or made tranquil. with the wardens, she risks death, yes, but in the same way she has been risking death for years. she also doesn't need to mask herself at all with them, not really. there's more flexibility and less control among the grey wardens, although it's still controlling, just not to the same degree as the circles
carver:
carver... annoyed me for a long time, lmao. i was very unsympathetic to his character. i've since come around to him: this does not mean i think he made the right choices or anything, but i do find him interesting and sensibly written
i have seen in my own family how horribly damaging sibling jealousy can be. i think a lot of ppl see it as... almost casual, or petty. it is not. i mean, sure, it can be! but a lot of the time, it is not
it is something that eats away at a person's self-esteem. it was a big part of what destroyed my one brother. imagine feeling compared to someone your entire life, and knowing that you will never, ever be the desired one. imagine the resentment that would create. this isn't a workplace rivalry or something, this is in and out, day after day, for your entire life, until/unless you can leave home, which carver cannot. and that's just about hawke
when it comes to bethany, his twin... oof
she takes after their father. and in a world where carver survives, so does hawke. so he alone is without magic. but in either case, he's having to completely give over his life to protecting the mages he lives with. he wants, so badly, to be his own person; to be out from under hawke's shadow; to be free to live his own life, pursue his own interests, his own relationships, without having to worry about how that will come back on bethany, or hawke, or leandra, or everyone
whether his family contributed to these feelings or not, they are clearly present. he feels like a failure in comparison to hawke - and likely in comparison to bethany as well. he feels like he's expected to give up his entire life to protect one or both of his siblings
in his eyes, he is not even really seen as his own person. he is their guard. he's like a dog they bought to protect their home
and then they get to kirkwall. hawke gets friends. things are settling down. and he wants to join the city guard, which would be a good path for him. and aveline, as mentioned earlier, shuts him down completely. she blocks off the only good avenue he has available, leaving him very few options: he can become a mercenary; he can become a templar; or he can become a criminal. no one in kirkwall is going to take some refugee, hawke's brother - and again, that's how he's seen - on as an apprentice, and he doesn't want that life anyway
so. yes. his choices make sense for who he is, and i think being a grey warden would be a good path for him, although of course it comes with the reality of being blighted. but i think having his own life, even if it is, by its nature, a shorter life, would mean a great deal to him. being able to earn respect for who he is as a person and for what he can do; not for being hawke's brother, and not for giving his life over to protect his family (something he certainly thinks he failed miserably at), but for what he can do, as an individual
being a templar is... in some ways, yes, it would suit him. in many others, i think it will eat at him
