#bergam

2. Who tells their family/friends about their relationship first ? Carel phones his parents immediatly after to tell them the news. Menthe decides to wait a bit until she’s sure it’s going to work before telling her parents and friends that she entered a relationship with two older men who were already married. Bergam tells his parents during their weekly phonecall.

3. What do their family/friends think of their relationship ? Carel’s parents were a bit wary about their married son getting in a relationship with a young woman, but they warmed up very quickly to her as they did with Bergam.Bergam’s parents adopted Carel as soon as they met him, and they do the same with Menthe. They find her grumpiness adorable.Menthe’s parents would have been scared of their daughter entering a polyamorous (and kinda weird) relationship, but Menthe has known those two for years, and most important, she trusts them. So they accept it, even if it takes a bit of time.Vallyn and Valrosh, Bergam’s workmates, find it a bit strange that they decide to include a weird, introvert, grumpy girl in a working relationship, and someone they had to work with, but everybody is happy, so what’s the problem ? A few of their workmates don’t think the same, they think it’s weird and wrong for them to date a girl they helped, but those people don’t matter to them. Bérengère and Arrakis are especially glad to see Menthe being at peace. They know Carel and Bergam wouldn’t hurt a fly, so their little shapeshifter is safe. And they find them quite cute. Pasiphae does, too. She was very happy to see her protegee open up to other people, especially if Arrakis trusts them, and to see her bloom thanks to them, and she’s very proud of her too. She’s the one who has The Talk with them (”if you hurt her …”), but it was more like “once she’s done with you, I’ll make myself some pretty trophies with what’s left of you”.Llyr secretly envies their relationship, and Menthe’s personal growth. It doesn’t stop him from being very happy for her. Yuki finds Carel and Bergam a bit intimidating, but she quite likes them. Shizuka finds the three of them amazingly cute together.

4. When do they move together ? Where and how ? It takes several years in the relationship before they are ready to move together. Bergam and Carel already live together so they just have to adapt to a new person in their daily life. Menthe is 22 now and assured that she loves those two dorks. They decide to buy a new house, not too big, but with enough place for them, and a nice garden because Menthe likes outdoors. And when she moves in with them, she brings her six cats with her. Carel and Bergam bring the furniture and everything else. They settle in a daily routine very easily, even if the placement of the armchairs, beds and such take a bit more time.

5. Who proposes and how ? Carel did propose to Bergam. He used every trick in the book : dinner, romantic music, red roses, champagne under the moonlight, and a pretty ring. Bergam had to say yes (and he did). Bergam is the first to propose to make their relationship with Menthe official. They don’t use the romantic approach, but Bergam cooks a nice meal, and Carel finds a necklace that matches their wedding ones. During dessert, they ask her together, and of course, Menthe says yes too.

6. Where do they go on their honeymoon ? Bergam and Carel have already gone on a honeymoon, but they gladly plan a second one for the three of them. They decide to go on a nice little trip, visiting several places of interest instead of staying in the same place. It’s a good, happy start for their relationship, and they come back with lots of colorful memories.

Let’s talk about sex~

7. Who has the biggest kink (and what is it) ? Carel does, but not by much. Due to her…. less than stellar relationship with sex, Menthe doesn’t really have any kinks besides “being gentle and soft and not overwhelming”, and Bergam’s are mostly “people take care of him”. Carel’s biggest kink is “shirts”. It might seem strange, but he can’t resist his lovers wearing nothing but his white shirts. Or flannel shirts, he’s not difficult.

8. Who initiates sex more often ? Carel, probably. He’s always ready to jump in bed (or somewhere else) with one or both lovers for a bit of fun.

9. What kink/kinks turn(s) one (or both) of them off ? Carel doesn’t really like pain play, and hurting someone or being hurt makes him want to help the person more than have fun times. Bergam isn’t really turned off by specific kinks, but there’s not real problem with Carel and Menthe. Almost every kinks turn Menthe off, except the most harmless ones like Carel’s.

10. What’s the craziest place they’d have sex ? Carel and Bergam probably had sex almost everywhere in the flat. And maybe once or twice in the showers at the center where Bergam works. With Menthe, they probably only have sex in the bedroom with two or three people involved. It’s more comfortable and easier, especially for her.

11. Who is more aggressive in bed ? When you date someone who endured sexual violence, you don’t show the slightest hint of aggressivity. Even after years of therapy, Menthe still freezes when one of them is too forceful, so Carel and Bergam do their best to be gentle. Sometimes, Menthe can show a bit of forwardness, but not a lot. Besides, Carel likes it gently too.

12. How does the other person react when their partner wears something special (boots, lingerie, etc.) ? Most of the time, Bergamn and Menthe as the ones wearing something special, and Carel positivly squeals. A grown man squealing is an impressive show, but they are used to it. When Menthe and Carel wear / do something special for Bergam, he gives them that kind of huge smile that makes them all warm and fluffy inside. Menthe just becomes beet red and stammers a lot until they catch her in a hug.

13. Lights on or off ? Off. Even after several years, Menthe is still quite shy with everything that has to do with sex. She’s more comfortable with the lights off.

Quirks and habits

14. What are their quirks while sleeping ? Bergam sleeps like a log. Once he falls asleep, he doesn’t move at all. Which, of course, is hilarious when he falls asleep on the couch. Menthe sleeps all curled up on herself, like a cat. She doesn’t move either, but she’s a light sleeper. She sometimes takes sleep pills, but her use of them has greatly decreased over the years. Carel doesn’t move lots, but he has to cuddle something to sleep soundly. The only difficulty now is to catch Menthe and Bergam in his arms at the same time. And of course, they always have at least one or two cats sleeping on the bed with them.

15. Who wakes the other one up with kisses ? Carel LOVES to play alarm clock for Bergam and Menthe, and to wake them up with kisses and hugs. Of course, it means waking up before them, but he doesn’t care, he can take all the bed when they leave and go back to sleep.

16. Who is the morning person/night person ? Carel was a morning person at first, but waking up early for his lovers changed his sleep schedule, and now he’s average. It still takes him a bit of time to wake up on mornings, and he doesn’t stay up too late, but he’s quickly functionnal.Bergam and Menthe are evening / night persons, meaning getting up for work or whatever they have to do that day is a bit of an ordeal. They need hugs, coffee and at least one hour to wake up properly, during which they are incredibly grumpy. Carel doesn’t mind

17. Who is the romantic one (Valentine’s Day or other) ? Carel loves grand gestures, be it picking up his lovers at work and surprising them with a meal in a nice restaurant, buying them roses, or loudly professing his love in front of everyone (making them blush and trying to smother him). Bergam and Menthe are more… pragmatic. Their romantism extends to cooking a meal for someone when they come home late from work, doing an extra load of laundry to help or, especially for Bergam, buying his lovers the thing they really, really wanted for a while.

18. Who would lead in ballroom dancing ? Bergam doesn’t like dancing and is bad at it, so Carel was overjoyed to know that Menthe knew how to tango, and that she’s a good dancer. He won the right to lead after a fierce one-on-one rugby match, but Menthe challenges him sometimes for fun. But that’s mostly because she likes rugby a lot.

19. Who is the one to most likely pick the movie they watch ? Since they have widely different tastes, they take turns. One decides, the other two are allowed to make as many comments as they want to, and, in Carel’s case, bombard him with popcorn.

20. Who is the one who would pay for dates ? Carel, because he has lots of money from his parents. Sometimes, Bergam and Menthe offer to pay, but he doesn’t let them. Not that he’s old-fashioned and see himself as the “dominant” in the relationship, but he tells them to keep their money to buy themselves whatever they want to, and he loves to treat them. It works most of the time.

21. Who takes over the beauty/style department ? No one. They all like casual clothes, they feel more comfortable in them. Bergam only cares about quality of his clothes, Menthe likes big hoodies, and Carel has a fondness for flannel shirts. They sometimes give each other little advices, but that’s all.

22. What would they get each other for gifts ? Bergam gives Carel and Menthe small, decorative objects or jewelry he carved into wood. Carel gets posters of his favourite movies, authographed pictures, CDs of his favourite bands, DVD of his favourite westerns, books about them or about dance, concert tickets… He gives Bergam expensive archery stuff, tools for carving wood, and his top-of-the-line coffee maker. Menthe gets cat-adorned stuff for her collection from them, including cat plushes, fantasy novels, and a very expensive bow so she can practice. And a wonderful dress to tango with Carel.

23. Who cusses more ? Menthe. She cusses very casually, inserting swear words in every sentence. Bergam and Carel end up buying a swear jar to stop that avalanche of bad language. It doesn’t work, but at least, they never run out of pocket change.

24. Who remembers things ? And who forgets the birthdays and anniversaries (and has to be forgiven) ? Bergam and Menthe remembers most of the things (Menthe takes great pain to even remember every cat’s birthday), Carel takes notes everywhere and promptly loses them. Bergam makes a game to collect them and paste them in a special journal.

25. Who is the bigger cuddler ? Carel. He loves cuddles, and is always ready to sit down with one or two of his lovers and just stay like that. If Bergam and Menthe are away, he’ll cuddle the cats.

26. Nicknames for each other ? Carel calls Bergam “teddy bear” and “my bear”, and Menthe is of course “Kitten”. When he’s upset with them bickering, Bergam calls them “CHILDREN !” in an angry tone. Menthe just uses names.

27. Who decorates the apartment ? Since they settle together in a new house, they decide to decorate together. So they take everything they want to use, paintings, posters, knicknacks, figures, put them together, and vote on everyone. Carel’s posters are thoroughly studied, Menthe’s cat pictures and their matching frames only take some kitty eyes, Bergam’s archery trophies are a given. When everything is decided and separeted according to the rooms they’ll go in, they take time arranging them tastefully. Of course, since nothing is cat proof, the carefully selected decorations tend to fall, but it’s as close as perfect as they can get.

28. Who initiates duets ? Depends. Carel does it on his favourite songs that the other two don’t always know. Menthe does it sometimes too, when she’s feeling particulary happy. And Carel loves to drag Bergam with him to sing the song Pasiphae wrote for Menthe, because it makes her take an interesting shade of red and hide his face in her hoodie.

29. What do they do to cheer each other up ? Bergam uses food, and it’s super effective ! He likes cooking a good meal, because he thinks everything is a bit better when you get your favourite food. He’ll bring his companions well-cooked food, their favourite shirt or hoodie, and try his best to make them feel better. Or he’ll make them a good hot chocolate, and sit with them at the table so they can pour their hearts out. Carel is more… outward in his approach. He’ll catch his beloved in a big, bear hug (with a warning if he’s hugging Menthe), and will only let them go when they feel better. Of course, he’ll listen to each and every thing they have to say, even if they just complain about the fridge who doesn’t freeze correctly, or that asshole who doesn’t take archery seriously. He likes the “sit down with warm beverage and talk” method too, but most of the time, the bear hug wins. Menthe is less verbose. When Bergam or Carel is down, she brings them one of the cats, and stays with them until they feel better. At first, she curled up in cat form in their lap, but now, she stays as she is and cuddles them. 

Daily life

30. Who is more tech-savvy ? Carel is the one always looking at new technological things, and he sometimes buys some because he likes them. But he never reads the user manual, and lacks the patience to understand or fix them. Menthe or Bergam often have to take over the fittings and explain him how it works.

31. Who drinks all of the coffee ? Bergam is the one who drinks almost all the coffee and takes full thermoses to work. He even has a top-of-the-line coffee maker that Carel bought him. Carel drinks what’s left and makes more for his companion. Menthe likes hot chocolate better.

32. Who does what chores ? Bergam takes care of the cooking and laundry. Carel cleans during the day, do the paperwork and balances checkbooks and bills. Menthe takes care of the cats, and helps with whatever needs help, like sheets laundry or after a rugby play. They do grocery shopping together, and Menthe always manage to ride in the cart.

33. Who kills the bugs ? Carel does sometimes, but it’s more because he’s careless than by malice. Bergam catches them and releases them outside. Menthe doesn’t care about bugs. In fact, those who kill most bugs are probably the cats.

34. Who makes the bed in the mornings ? Bergam. Sometimes he makes it even with Carel and/or the cats (and Menthe) in it. Because he can.

35. Who starts getting into holidays way before they should ? Bergam. He knits winter solstice sweaters, decorates and gets gifts, and plans celebrations and visits to temples way before the time. Menthe and Carel get used very quickly to the holidays songs and special food. Later, the kids love that the different holidays start so early at home, and they help bake cookies and decorate the house.

36. Who initiates the couple selfies ? They each ask for it, when they are somewhere or just having fun, but Carel is the one trying to take surprises selfies. It’s not really easy to smush the three of them in a surprise pic. And he has a very interesting one where Menthe is clawing at his face because he took her by surprise when she was already on her last nerve.

37. Who always ends up with too much junk food after grocery shopping ? If fish counts as junk food, then it’s Menthe. She always uses her kitty eyes to get more fish than necessary. Carel is quite fond of onion-flavored snacks, and Bergam has a not-secret love for dark chocolate, but nothing can beat Menthe’s affection for fish.

38. Who asks to keep the abandoned kitten/puppy they find in the rain ? Menthe, Menthe, Menthe. She seems to be a magnet for lost kittens. Carel and Bergam know she can’t resist them,  so they have to be firm, because they already have six cats : she can keep them for the night, feed them and bathe them, but she has to bring them at the no-kill shelter the next day. Later, she starts her own shelter for cats and people, and just keeps all the kittens she finds.

39. So how many pets, and who rememebers to feed them ? They have a basis of six cats, not counting all the strays who cruise through the garden. Menthe feeds them, of course. They are HER lovely cats (even the strays), and she dedicates a portion of her day to feed them, pet them, play with them, and make sure they are as happy as they can be. Of course, Carel and Bergam help, but she takes the task at heart. 

40. Who gets babied when they’re sick ? They all do. When Carel is sick, Bergam takes great care of him, brings him food and drugs, adjusts the bed, brings him the TV set, … Menthe brings him the cats and takes over his share of housework (except the bills). When Menthe is sick, Bergam does the same. Carel is the one bringing the cats, taking care of them instead of her, and cuddling her until she feels better (then he’s the one getting sick).When Bergam is sick, Carel and Menthe take turns cooking instead of him, with… various results. They do their best to take care of him as he takes care of them, and having the house running in perfect order while he’s not feeling good. In all three cases, it ends up with cuddles and warm chocolate while watching their favourite movies.

41. Who brings breakfast to bed ? Bergam. It’s part of his way to make his lovers feel good. Of course, it’s difficult with their respective schedules, but on week-ends, when no one has to go to work, he likes to carefully make a nice breakfast and bring it to the room. That way, they can all comfortably settle in bed and enjoy a lazy morning.

42. Who has sole posession of the T.V. remote ? Menthe, because she’s the one finding it under the couch cushions, or under the furniture. She finds it, she keeps it. But Bergam and Carel can ask to change the channels or turn up the sound.

43. Who comes home drunk at 3am ? Carel, because Bergam doesn’t drink much because he’s the driver and the responsible adult, and Menthe, not at all because she doesn’t like to lose control. So they all come home at 3 AM, but Carel is the only one drunk. Sometimes, they have to carry him to bed, Menthe swearing all the way that he’s too heavy and she’s going to drop him in the hallway.

44. What do they do when they’re away from each other ? Bergam does the same as usual : work, cooking, woodwork, but he sends his lovers lots of texts. Carel is the same. He tends to sulk a bit when left alone, and sends lots of sappy messages. Menthe keeps the cats around even more, so as not feeling too lonely, and sends detached messages full of emoji. When Carel is away, Bergam and Menthe take advantage of it and watch every movie he doesn’t like. Carel and Menthe alone play a lot of sports and eat more junk food and take-away than Bergam would find reasonable. When Menthe is away, Bergam and Carel spend time together as they did before, but Carel borrows a cat plush from Menthe’s hoard to hug. Bergam finds it adorable.

45. What are they afraid of ? Bergam is afraid of something happening to his little family. He knows they can take care of themselves : Carel is tall and strong, and Menthe is aggressive and stubborn. But he can’t help that pinch of worry when they aren’t home when they should, or when he hears strange noises during the night. Of course, the cats are part of the family, and he often checks on them when he fears something could happen to them. He’ll do the same with the kids when they have some. As Bergam, Carel is afraid of something happening to his friends. He’s especially afraid that he won’t be able to protect them. He tries his best to leave them live their life without being overprotective, but sometimes, it’s hard not to ask to go with them, or to call when they reached their destination. That, and snakes. He’s deathly afraid of snakes. Menthe is still wary about physical contacts, especially when she doesn’t initiate them. She does her best to overcome it, with various success. Sometimes it’s hard, but she has very understanding lovers. The thing she’s most afraid of is metting the men who hurt her once again. Not only because they could try to hurt her again, and maybe Carel and Bergam, but because she’s not sure how she would react. She’s scared of either completly shutting off, or flying into a blind rage and trying to kill them with her bare hands. She just knows that it would probably destroy her.

46. How often do they fight ? Bergam and Carel often fight when Carel is being childish. Bergam and Menthe almost never fight, but they sometimes argue when they don’t agree on a point. Seeing their age difference, it could come more often. Menthe and Carel often bicker about things, but it’s never serious.

47. What would they do if the other one was hurt ? In one word : rage. Not in the same way, of course. Bergam is the cold, burning inside kind of rage. You don’t want to be on his path when the nice, cuddly bear turns into a furious grizzly. Menthe expresses her rage by lots of swear words, and trying to reduce the culprit to a bloody pulp. Carel becomes a beacon of fury, and unleashes on anyone who made the mistake to hurt his lovers. They’ll be lucky if they escape him alive. Then, of course, cuddles and comfort follow.

And once they have kids…

48. How many kids ? Menthe doesn’t want biological kids ; as a half-shapeshifter, and then later a full one, she had to face racism for a long time, and she doesn’t want her kids to have to endure it. In their line of work, Bergam and Menthe see lots of kids in need of help and a home, so they decide to adopt a few of them. They aren’t picky about gender or race, they just offer to take in those in need. The first child they adopt is a cat shapeshifter named Rakel. She’s tiny, adorable, and has the most wonderful and huge yellow cat eyes you’ve ever seen. Menthe feels an instant kinship with her, and convinces Carel and Bergam to adopt her. Once she’s settled enough, she’s quite easy to live with. She loves knitting, so they supply her with lots of wool.Their second child, Clarence, is a sailfish merman. He’s silent and introvert, and loves reading above everything else. A merperson is difficult to adopt, due to the necessity to provide them with a huge body of water, preferably running. Bergam, Menthe and Carel rise to the challenge with excellency.Finally, their third child is Lydia, a hybrid of vampire and eros (and a few other things. It’s complicated). She was a long time in the system, because eros children are scarcely given for adoption (lots of people are drawn to them because of their magnetism, but can’t handle everything they need). As a result, she’s bitter and withdrawn. It takes lots of work, but she finally opens up to Bergam, then Menthe, and finally Carel. They decide to adopt her. Since they know several Eros, they’ll be able to get the advice they need for her. It’s a bit hesitant at first, but soon, they all form a happy, cute little family.

49. Who is the stricter parent ? Bergam. He knows when to be strict and say no, even if he relents sometimes. And his work with people with difficulties and anger issues made him tantrum-proof. Menthe is softer, even if she’s merciless when she decided something. Carel is a real teddy bear who can’t say no. But if Bergam said no, he’ll side with him no matter what. 

50. Who stays up late helping with homework ? Probably Carel. He’s the one who doesn’t have a job to go to on the mornings, so staying late isn’t too hard for him. He doesn’t like homework more than the kids do, but he does an effort, because he knows that if he doesn’t, Bergam probably will, and his teddy bear needs his sleep.

51. Who likes to take the family out and for what ? Carel likes to take the family out for all kinds of outings : museums, concerts, walks, exhibitions, Bergam’s archery demonstrations, … Bergam sometimes offers ideas too, but Carel has more free times. Menthe only drags everyone to Pasiphae’s concerts and parties organized by the nobility. But having kids is a good excuse to avoid the latter, and she makes good use of it.