#bearkats

Today was the first day of my spring semester. I have a lot of mixed emotions about continuing my education here, so this blog (one of my favorite coping skills) has been on a bit of a back burner recently.

For me, this semester’s mantra will be “KEEP MOVING FORWARD.” Ya know from Meet the Robinsons... great movie. Anyway, I am taking these classes here so I may have the opportunity to move forward and participate in something I am truly passionate about. Something that sets my soul on fire and stuff. I keep telling myself that I am here working hard to get to the next and, hopefully, more enjoyable chapter. By keeping focused on this, hopefully I can make it to the end of the semester in one piece.

Friday marked the last day of classes this semester and I couldn’t feel more relieved. Well, sorta. This semester has been filled with many emotional ups and downs for me. I tried taking my mind off of school with trips and adventures but it never seemed to last. At some point I had to return to this place of emotional turmoil. You see - I’m just not happy here, but that’s another story in itself...

Anyways I had gone all semester working towards my final research portfolio (covering all things eating disorders in sport of course), but this day of all days an issue presented itself. My professor informed me that because I did not work in a group I would be unable to turn my final paper in for credit. However, her statement contradicts what other students have been told as my peers working individually have had the opportunity to submit their work online.

Confused and frustrated I sat with my thoughts for hours before coming to the conclusion that this might be her way of retaliation against me (earlier in the semester I had reported her to the accommodations office for a violation in policy {it was a principle thing for me}). So I reached out to the department via phone to let them know what was going on from my prospective. It was here that I failed; miserably. Over the phone I became so nervous that I failed to articulate my words in a way that was easy to follow and digest. I was a wreck thinking about how the conversation could affect my overall grade or create a bigger problem.

Additionally, because I failed to advocate for myself in a way that verbally backup my claim of retaliatory actions, I was told to simply read over the syllabus and maybe give the office an email on Monday. This left me, alone in a room far away from campus, in literal tears. I am terrible over the phone, especially when it comes to stressful conversations. I just can’t help it.

Fast forward a few deep breaths and I had decided to just email my professor the paper. I am currently waiting for a response where she hopefully says something along the lines of “I apologize for any undue stress this has caused you, of course I will accept your submission through email,” but until then I am in the dark. And to be honest I really don’t know what to do but just sit here and wait. So sit here I will (whilst trying not to panic any more than I already have).

Pictures from our most recent photo-scavenger hunt!!!!

Take a picture with a university staff member

Take a picture with a football player

Take a picture with a statue on campus

Take a picture with an animal (a roach counts right?)