Nov 26, 2014
What's that?... You want me to come in? #islandlife #Grenada #isleofspice #saltlife #boats #barefootjournal #lifeproof #caribbeansea #skyporn (at Prickly Bay, Grenada)
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What's that?... You want me to come in? #islandlife #Grenada #isleofspice #saltlife #boats #barefootjournal #lifeproof #caribbeansea #skyporn (at Prickly Bay, Grenada)
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
The Challenge
Write. Write one sentence. Write one word. Once a day; EVERYDAY, just write something. Write it down. Allow it to mean something. Embrace the healing power of the written word.
The Challenge:
I've decided that; at the time of my life, I need to start expressing myself through written word. My challenge is to do a 100 day journal. This is only a starting point. After the 100 days, I hope to keep the challenge going for a very long time. I hope that with this challenge, I begin to embrace the healing power of the written word, each and every day.
Follow along my journey, or start a journey of your own. Either way, I hope you enjoy the paths it takes you along.
- Barefoot, Lost, & (trying to be) Free
#TBT Get away from the busy every day life... #islandlife #Grenada #isleofspice #tropical #traveldeeper #barefootjournal #people #iphoneonlyphoto
For anyone that might be having a bad day.
aka me.
Go follow on vine:
The_Miuccio_Brothers
One day I'll see the world through a different perspective than I was raised.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
.::Sometimes you feel [EVERYTHING] and [NOTHING] all at once, Sometimes you find yourself [SMILING] while [MISSING] something at the same time, At times you can absolutely l o v e . a person while wanting to h a t e . them, Life comes without {guarantees} but you can expect that Smiling will brighten your face, Laughing will enhance your eyes, and falling in love- will change your life...
48th hour
Another day.
Another whole day.
Gone by without any slight gesture from you.
48 whole hours.
Do you even care? Do you care how I feel in the slightest?
Leave me be?
After 6 months all you can say to me is "LEAVE ME BE?"
We have talked every single moment of every single day for the past 6 months and 18 days.
That calculates out to be: 28 weeks 3 days 199 days 4,776 hours 286,560 minutes 1,719,360 seconds
That is a ridiculous amount of time to spend with someone. To love someone. To care about someone enough to give them all of the time in the day.
I've been sitting here for the past two days. Waiting. Waiting for you to call me, or text me, or any form of gesture to me to show me that you are alive, that you still care, that you believe this can work.
Do you have any idea how that makes me feel?
To just sit here and wait. Wait. I'M STILL WAITING. Trying to keep my mind off the fact that I might lose you. That I might lose my person. The person who I fall asleep beside. The one who I wake up to. The one that loves me and protects me and says he'll always be there for me. The one who talked about marrying me, and having children, and growing old together.
You don't do this to the people that you love.
You don't intentionally try to hurt them.
I know you are hurting and that you need your space, but what do you think this does for me? Do you think it's healthy for our relationship for me to feel so alone? For me to feel as if I can't even contact you in fear that you will get mad and I end up losing you over it. Don't you think this makes me want to find someone who will listen? Who will understand. Who will think that I'm worth the fight.
I AM WORTH THE FIGHT!
I have done everything in my power to try to ensure your happiness. I know I have things to work on. I have never claimed to be perfect, but I have done more great and amazing things for you than any of the bad things that may have arose.
I have no appetite. I can't sleep. Everyone keeps telling me it will get better, but I honestly don't know if it will.
I've been through breakups before. But nothing has ever compared to this. I've never been so invested into something. I've never tried so hard. I've never had so much faith.
It's soul tearing.
I can't even tell you this because that would be me hurting you. I don't want to hurt you anymore.
I guess in the meantime I'll allow my writing to distract me.
- Barefoot, Lost, & (trying to be) Free
Fallen
How do you start this. How does anyone start these things. How do you one day decide that a computer is your only chance to feel like your voice can be heard. To completely be able to open up. Not knowing who will see this. & not caring what they think. This is for me. This is a way for me to deal with my constant need to bottle-up every single feeling that I posses. It hasn't always been this hard. I've never struggled with getting my words out. I was never afraid to tell someone how I felt. It always came so naturally to me. Then one day, "poof" gone. It was almost as if my whole ability to open up to people, to let people into my heart, to break down my walls, and to allow myself to be vulnerable, was completely shattered. As if it was twisted into this dark hole, never to see the light of day again. "What is wrong with me? Am I so biochemically screwed up, so neurotic, so narcissistically self-absorbed that every hour is an obstacle course for me?” I don’t know, but this can’t continue. I feel like I am dying. A slow torturous death. And the worst thing is that I’m taking other people along for the ride. But I swear, I don’t know how to do it differently. My teenage and adult life has been a constant cycle of pushing people who love me away. Always hoping that it was the best for them, but never knowing how much it hurt, or how much it can impact someone until it happened to me. Six months in a relationship with the man that exceeded all of my expectations in a partner. Six months, and I still couldn't allow myself to be completely happy. Happiness like this doesn't exist. There had to be something so imperfect about the perfection that was arising. I was scared. I didn't know how to accept love. I've never really known how to accept love. I didn't feel that I deserved his love. I would constantly pick fights over nothing. I don't know if I was attempting to test the strength of our relationship, or if it could be due to a lingering subconscious feeling that there may be something more drastically wrong, but I loved him so much. I love him so much, and yet subconsciously I continued to push him further and further away. I've made him so unhappy. The worst part is, I was too blinded to even notice. I wasn't there for him when he needed me. I was his only support. I was his only person. He needed me so much and I wasn't even there for him. I hate myself for that. I hate how I made him feel. And now I'm afraid that he will never forgive me and that I will lose him forever. He is my person. And I have never been so scared in my life. - Barefoot, Lost, & (trying to be) Free