#banging dope

He contacted me.. After 11 months he reached me by Facebook. I was .. I can’t describe what I was feeling. I was beside myself. Until he typed the words saying I fucked his life up. That I was to blame for everything. Not the fact he was a heroin addict 20+ years and stole and lied to everyone. That when I left there was absolutely nothing left in the apartment. No fridge even or dishes, just nothing. He says he is still on the streets of south Africa. How he got hold of a phone I didnt ask. He asked if I was using…I stated yes, using meth. But had not touched heroin since. I told him I have been homeless for months now.

I am in shock. He stated he misses me, but He is supposed to contact me the same time tomorrow… But why should he bother?

I just don’t know how I feel. Like shooting up is what I want

Hello today I just wanna die.

I found my boyfriend tried to do my homie dirty.

Nay I told muhfuggahs im loyal.

I stay true.

Don’t fuck with me.

I’ve been steady high lately.

Just gradual.

Everything feels like it’s falling back into place but idk how it all got so out of hand.

I’m starting to get clingy.

BACK UP BITCH!!!!! 😒😳😅

I just don’t know how to not be so extreme when it comes to my emotions, urges and bad habits.

Why does it feel like this is never ending?

I’m so fucking tired but I just want to stay fucked up.

I don’t think I really want to get clean anymore.

I don’t think I ever have.

I’m coming down and I’m sick, sick and in pain.

I just want to die.