#bandslam

Honestly if you told me Sa5m is like an enby or a demigirl I’d buy it. They have a gender neutral name, they’re a punk rocker, their whole Vibe™ is very gender. I dig it. New headcanon.

If you are like me, then you're likely one of the few people who still own (and treasure) their home video copy of a 2009 movie called "Bandslam". Starring Gaelan Draper, Aly Michalka and Vanessa Hudgens, it is mostly notable for being David Bowie's last film credit before his passing in January 2016.

As a teenager raised by television, the media often felt like escapism from a reality I longed to put behind. I would sit down and either spend hours reading about bands, movies and tv shows I liked, or consuming them, wishing life would cross over the line of fiction, finally allowing me to live adventures in the likes of Ferris Bueller or that kid from Almost Famous.

Needless to say, Bandslam was a piece of media I often clung to. It introduced me to The Velvet Underground & Nico, made me a Bowie fan and, through Will Burton and Sa5m, it got me. Just like them, I had difficulties fitting and felt alienated from my peers. I tried my best, and sometimes it just wasn't enough. As a child of divorce, living with my mother meant she'd get overprotective at all my attempts at having a social life -- way more than Karen.

My father never Drove Under Influence, but he made me put up with a lot of verbal abuse. I felt so detached from him, and simultaneously so attached to John Hughes movies that, like Will, I felt the need to pretend my dad was someone else. Around that time, you'd see me on social media as "Davi Hughes", a homage to the man who I felt sent me (much needed) messages through film dialogue.

Some would say I spoke passionately about the music I love, and I would feel just like Will Burton on a random afternoon talking about The Velvet Underground. I could also relate to his anxiety on “important” social interactions, and would often envision my first kiss happening just like that scene at 49 minutes 07 seconds. I often spent countless hours reading books instead of interacting with fellow humans, like Sa5m.

Hours went by as I read every article on Bandslam. Watching deleted scenes and listening (more) Aly & AJ became sort of a habit. It really bothered me that the movie wasn’t big despite having a post-High School Musical Vanessa Hudgens, and news outlets would say that Summit Entertainment did a really poor job promoting it. Upon reading this, my passionate teen self felt the need to “spread the word”. Davi Hughes became Da5vi (the 5 is silent), a very weird Graff disciple.

I wrote about it for my town’s newspaper. There were multiple articles on personal blogs, national music publications and even teen websites. Once the DVD came out, I brought it to an English class in my school, along with the worksheet my fellow classmates were meant to do on it, just to make sure the (new, fresh meat) teacher would watch it with us. My classmates found out about the activity and weren’t very pleased, as they had issues with English as a second language. That’s how, for the first time in my academic life, I went straight to the principal’s office.

Years went by and eventually I became an English Teacher myself, so either through film or literature -- the original script was adapted as a book at some point -- I often include Bandslam as an extracurricular activity each semester. I long for students' reactions on specific scenes, and wonder if the music would change their lives just like it changed mine.

And I also wondered if someone out there felt as passionate about Bandslam. Or if Todd himself was aware that there was a person (maybe people) that loved his motion picture so much. I really wanted to tell him that. In my mind, it would make up for it not being the next “Juno”.

But he was not on social media. I only saw him through DVD extras and the commentaries he wrote on each song in the Bandslam soundtrack -- those prompted me to envision him as a Will Burton of sorts. He just seemed very, intensely passionate about music in general, regardless of it coming from huge bands or not. “Did he have the same backstory as Will?” and “How much of it was personal?” were questions that often ran through my mind.

Very little was available on-line about him. Only film credits, photos from the Bandslam premiere.... I'd often try to contact Gaelan and Aly about it. Sometimes I would just go around tweeting Elvy, Scott and Charlie whenever I was watching the movie... And of course, every now and then I would once again search for Todd's social network profiles -- only to find nothing.

Nada.

Zero.

Was he dead? I hoped not.

2020 came and so did the coronavirus. I was in lockdown and, like everyone else, not feeling my best. I longed for a sign that better days would come, and just like in my teens, the media gave me that. Bandslam gave me that. So there I was, once again embarking on the years-old quest of finding Todd Graff and telling him "I really like your movie".

I might have sent a Cincinatti Todd Graff "hi" on Facebook because his profile picture was sort of mysterious. I searched Instagram and Twitter. Delved deep on multiple Google results… still nothing. Once I got a temporary IMDb pro account, which allows people to get professional contact information on everyone in Hollywood, I thought my search would come to an end.

Todd Graff’s contact info wasn’t listed. Why was this man so difficult to find?

"Wait", I remembered. "He's married to a Latino man". I saw them together in a picture of the Bandslam premiere once, and his name was listed in an article that went with the photo. With that information in hand, once again I went on social networks in search of Bandslam’s Todd Graff. But this time, much to my surprise, the first result seemed promising, as this Jhon Lafaurie, a Spanish-speaking man who looked just like that decade-old photo, actually showed up on Facebook search. "Must be him", I thought. So I used my Spanish degree provided by years of listening to RBD music and pieced together a message that conveyed my intentions -- or so I hoped.

I honestly thought he'd block me, but days later I received a notification that left my inner Will on the floor of a McCallum High School hall, static, wearing a t-shirt that says “I can’t go on”.

A message.

In English.

From Todd Graff himself.

He's as music nerdy as you would expect. I can't match his knowledge on music even if I tried -- unless we are talking “obscure bubblegum pop groups of the naughties” lingo. I always thought I knew obscure bands of the 20th century, because I liked Photomaker, The Restless Virgins and so on. His current obsession at the time said otherwise: he was revisiting a band called Mission of Burma. Reading that was like reading the name of a very intense board game -- their debut album, Vs, is really good though.

I like to think that if the CBGBs were still open, he would definitely be there digging the bands. Holding Jhon’s hand and telling friends how amazing his abs (and academic curriculum) were.

However, Todd’s life had nothing to do with Will Burton's, like I used to picture, and his 2003 movie Camp is likely a more accurate depiction of his experiences, as it was based on his experiences at Stagedoor Manor, a performing arts camp -- likely the same camp that inspired the silent 5 in Sa5m, and the reason why he's a huge Broadway nerd.

Truth be told, singing on the first Sesame Street record, being part of the Short Circus, writing a Fran Drescher movie and being nominated for a Tony Award was much better than being called Dewey.

His favorite game, of course, is music-related. And he invited me to play with him on Zoom. Multiple times. I would teach a class on a Saturday morning and then at night I’d be playing BEAT THE INTRO with actual Hollywood people. Bandslam people. There was even a 10 year anniversary reunion. That I was part of. Would my inner Will Burton ever be able to recover?

Months have passed since our last email exchange. Since then, I discovered that Bandslam couldn’t go on, but it went on: there is a teen band in the Philippines that did this killer Amphetamine cover on YouTube. And I got in touch with quite a few people who also list Bandslam as one of their comfort movies -- one of them said it was one of those pictures that “felt like home”. I even found a dude from Thailand whose social network handles are also inspired by Sa5m!

Just like that, the world felt right again.

So this decade's most decadent year (as of today) gave me a very peculiar joy: I finally got to know Todd Graff. And although he wasn’t exactly the person I pictured for over a decade, I assure you he is definitely the coolest person in California — and the person my inner Will needed at that time.

(And yes, in case you ever wondered, Wichita Lineman by Glen Campbell does calm children down and help them focus. A true godsend.)