#avoidance compulsions

Mental compulsions include but are not limited to: ruminating (being stuck on a thought and analyzing it), attempting to logic your way out of the thoughts (“no that’s not true because…”), and searching your memory for evidence (like telling yourself you did not hurt your friend’s feelings because you remember already checking in with them). Yes, trying to replace “bad” thoughts with “good” thoughts to feel less guilty would also be a mental compulsion.

(Subtle) physical compulsions include but are not limited to: seeking reassurance, doing random jerk movements to “shake out” intrusive thoughts, excessive apologizing, over-explaining (usually in the case of being afraid of lying), needing to do things a specific number of times, doing something to one side of your body and needing to do it to the other (for symmetry or to feel “just right”), avoiding specific things or locations, and needing to repeat yourself. These ones are usually the ones people fail to notice that they do.

i'm pretty sure i have moral OCD, but at the same time none of the descriptors really fit how i feel. it could be because of my numbed emotions. those posts just make me feel deeply uncomfortable and i scroll and distract myself as fast as possible. though, if i know a friend saw it (for example because their reblog was what brought it on my dash) i do tend to overthink it ("what if they know i just scrolled past and think i don't support the cause and think i'm a bad person and hate me for it" etc.)

so, my question is, do people /actually/ freak out/panic over this or is it just an emotional term used? and if it's not an exaggeration, then does my experience still "count"? answers/opinions from both mod and anyone else encouraged and appreciated

I think everyone has varying experiences with their emotional responses to their distress. Yes, some people do panic, freak out, etc, but just because you don’t frantically go and do your compulsions doesn’t mean it isn’t OCD.

It’s also important to remember the existence of mental compulsions. If you find yourself going in circles, trying to “prove” to yourself that you aren’t a bad person as defined by your brain, I would say that could certainly still be OCD.

Feelings of anxiety don’t always manifest as panicking symptoms, just general dread or worries count too.

Your experience definitely counts. I can’t tell you 100% whether or not it’s OCD, but the fact that you overthink to the point of needing distraction/avoidance (which can also be a compulsion) tells me something is going on. I suggest looking into avoidance compulsions or mental compulsions and seeing how much you connect.