AstroTurtle shippers, come get y'all juice.
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AstroTurtle shippers, come get y'all juice.

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Astro: Hey Turtle? This might sound like a weird request but could you come to couples counseling with me?
Turtle: What? Why?
Astro: When I first met my therapist, he assumed I had a boyfriend and I was too awkward to correct him...
Astro: And when I kept saying āeverything was fineā with him while the rest of my life is on fire I knew I had to switch it up so we started fighting three months ago. You cheated on me but Iām willing to forgive it ācause I love you and I did become neglectful of our relationship so I partially blame myself. We have a trip to the Bahamas coming up and I want us to be back to our normal selves by then -
Astro: So anyway, will you come?
ask and ye shall receive.
Astroturtle headcanons for the mind and soul!
- Everyone assumes that Astroās a lovable small golden child who can do no harm.
- So when Astro, trying to socialize at a party, casually brings up the time he single-handedly had to kill a thousand-foot-long death worm with a laser gun in the sands of GJ 273b...
- Funnily enough, this doesnāt at all excuse how, when Turtle turned on the television for the first time and Astro saw the static, he was running for cover, convinced the thing was going to explode.
- When Astro crash-landed on Maskworld (or whatever we call it), Alien was actually the first one to find him. Turtle was the one who had a free room, since nobody could manage living with him.
- Astro will purposely troll Turtle by usingĀ āspace is weirdā as an explanation:
Turtle: Can you get me a coffee?
Astro: What is coffee? Is it milked from a plant?
Turtle: Youāre holding a Starbucks cup right now -
- The reason the toaster has a touch-screen is because Astro was bored and decided to spruce it up. Kid can fix anything, no manuals needed, with a toolbox, a couple of hours, and a Pop-Tart or two.
- For a first date, Turtle decided to try to watch Star Wars with Astro. This... did not end well. Astro ended up pausing the movie and explaining for over thirty minutes how flight dynamics rendered the whole thing practically impossible.
- They have a pet goldfish. Astro named it John. Turtle has never tried to explain how silly that name is.
- Look me in the eyes and tell me these two donāt have anything from these guys ->Ā https://www.moonglow.com/Ā .
...more? XD
heyyyy š«
Astro: Being a guy in love with a guy is not always cute or romantic or soft or tender. Sometimes it's pushing your husband's face away, yelling because you have viral bronchitis and he keeps trying to kiss you while knowing this because he's an idiot with no sense of self-preservation.
Astro: Update - Turtle got bronchitis! You'll never guess how...

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Night Angel, about Turtle: That idiot canāt be good at everything. Maybe heās a bad kisser or something.
Astro: No, heās good at that too.
Turtle: What?
Astro: What?
Turtle, trying to text Astro, sending a photo of one cow licking another: look, itās us <3
Turtle: wait no oh my God wrong person
Seahorse, on the receiving end: Ah. The wonders of technology.
Astro, interrogating: I should turn you in right now!
Turtle: You wouldnāt⦠would you?
Astro: Give me one reason I shouldnāt.
Turtle: Because Iām⦠cuteā¦?
Astro:
Astro, screaming in agony: