#armywriterssupport

You could tell that he was furious about the whole situation, and you shouldn’t have said Taehyung’s name. You couldn’t admit that the blissful dream you had was about Jungkook because that would only create endless problems. 

"Well, I don't care. You're not sharing a room with Taehyung anymore," he roars, just as Namjoon and Jin enter the room, the commotion waking them up.

 "What's going on here?" 

Jimin is the first to answer Jin's question after being silent throughout the entire uproar.

"Y/N had a wet dream about Taehyung, and now Jungkook doesn't want her to share a room with him," Jimin replies with a smug look on his face, clearly enjoying the drama.  

You should know by now that Jimin can be very blunt with his words, especially when he tries to get a reaction from you. He took every opportunity to embarrass you and make your cheeks flush with his sexual remarks. 

The tips of Jin’s ears begin to turn red as he comprehends the type of situation he walked into. The look that sets in on Joon’s face is the exact opposite. Instead, disappointment fills his eyes.   

This was definitely not the way he expected the tour to begin, but here he was being thrown into an entirely unusual and new situation. 

What else did he expect from the maknae line? 

You all watch as Joon runs his hands through his tousled hair, his lips opening to speak. 

"Well, who is she going to sleep with now?" 

You feel awkward standing there as you wait for an answer, unsure if you should speak up or let them handle it. At this point, you felt like you'd be rotating through each boy's bed, and that was not something you wanted. 

"Me."

Your head snaps up at the deep voice. The statement was more of a demand than a suggestion, only causing an unusual feeling to stir in your stomach. 

"I invited her, so she's staying with me. End of discussion," Jungkook explains, his eyes never wavering from yours.

His gaze feels intense, eyes unwavering from yours. You want to protest and demand you stay with someone else, but you can't find your voice. Your head just nods in agreement, your body taking over.   

"Now, since that's settled, we need to get ready for the interview," Joon reminds everyone as he makes his way out in a rush, Jin following in tow.

 A low-sounding whistle causes you and Jungkook to break eye contact turning to locate the source of such a suggestive sound.  

"Now, this should be interesting," Jimin smirks as he looks at the three of you. 

"So you have a wet dream about Taehyung, but now you’re sharing a room with Jungkook. I must admit I’m feeling very left out," he pouts, only making the situation worse for you.

A glare sets over Jungkook's face just as he lifts his leg kicking Jimin in his side. Jimin clutches his side in pain before running out and screaming at the top of his lungs, Jungkook trailing him.  

Suddenly silence takes over, and you’re left in the room alone with Taehyung. He remains in the same position, still lounging on the bed, only this time, his eyes look up at you curiously. You can't help but feel a little awkward as he stares at you, waiting for some words to fall out of your mouth. After what seems like hours but, in reality, a minute or two, he finally opens his mouth to speak. 

"Your dream wasn't about me, was it?"

Your eyes dart over to him, surprised that he would ask that. No words were needed on your part, though, as the look on your face only confirmed his suspicions. 

"Who was it?"

The short and direct question makes you feel uneasy as he moves, perching upon his elbow, excitement dancing across his face as he awaits your answer. Your eyes are only narrow as you lift a pillow, ready to hit him for prying so much.  

"Okay, okay, never mind. Just don't hit me," he yelps, raising his hands in surrender, not wanting to experience your wrath. 

"Good," you huff out before grabbing your items and making your way to the bathroom. Even though you wouldn't be a part of the interview, you still had to look good. You were traveling with the boys that looked like Greek statues. You needed to at least pretend to be on their level. 

After the somewhat awkward ride to the show, you could finally breathe. During the entire car ride, you sat silently, unsure what to say.

Just to your luck, you had to sit between Jungkook and Taehyung, the three of you not saying a word to each other. 

Now here you were in the dressing room, watching as the boys added finishing touches to their hair and makeup. You had been feeling quite out of place ever since the event that had happened earlier in the morning.

 The only two people you felt comfortable talking to were Hobi and Yoongi, the pair either having no idea about what occurred or not showing it.

"Are you excited to finally see us in idol mode?" Hobi asks you excitedly as he plops down on the couch beside you, his arm swinging around your shoulder.

 "Yea, I'm excited to see what you guys are like on TV," you reply, smiling while glancing at the other boys. 

Jungkook and Taehyung both sat in the chair, getting their hair fixed, while Jin and Jimin were munching on some fruits in the corner. Joon was in the other room putting on his outfit, and of course, Yoongi was on the other couch taking a quick nap. 

"Y/N," your head turns in the direction of Taehyung, a small smirk fixed on his lips as his eyes connect with yours through the mirror.

"Do you think I look sexier with the top of the shirt buttoned? Or unbuttoned? Your opinion is important to me," he smirks, playfulness swimming behind the blue contacts. 

You can feel Jungkook's eyes burning into you as you stare at Taehyung, wanting to kill him for putting you in this situation. 

"U-Um unbuttoned," you mumble before turning away and hearing a loud scoff leaving Jungkook's mouth at your answer. 

Your head whips around at the sudden sound, your eyes narrowing at the dark-haired boy sitting before you.

 "What? If you have something to say, then say it," you harshly spit out, suddenly growing tired of Jungkook's behavior.  

"I do have something to say. Why don't you broadcast it to the entire world that you want to get into Taehyung's pants? First the bed and now this," he harshly bellows, his voice deeper than usual as he feels the heat rushing to his face. 

"That's not true. I never said anything like that," you loudly shout as you stomp over to him, your feet stopping right in front of him. 

All of the crew members have long left the room; their work finished for the day as they check out the interview area. The only bodies left in place included the seven other boys and yourself. It was then that you realized all eyes were on the two of you.

"Pssh please, y/n. I can see the way you drool over him. You'd bend over for him in a second if he offered to fuck you," Jungkook grunts as he shakes his head, jaw clenching as his eyes flicker between you and Taehyung. 

You don't know where your sudden boldness comes from, but without thinking, your hand flies over to the glass of water, and without thinking, you pour it onto his head, the water running down the sides of his face and wetting his clothes. 

You can hear the loud gasps from the other members as they witness you lose control, finally letting your feelings of anger take over. 

"That's for being an asshole," you screech at him before grabbing your purse, pushing through the back doors, and running towards the black SUV.

Your hands shield your face as you hear the screams of hundreds of girls, their voices getting louder as they seem to notice you. Before you even realize it, you hear flashes and clicks going off. You feel the heat rushing to your face as fear builds within you. 

What if they attacked you? What if they saw your face? 

Quickly the driver helps you into the van, shutting it closed before any of the fans can get closer. You pray that questions of you wouldn't arise on Twitter. You pray that they would consider you to be a stylist or just someone who works at the company.

Today turned out differently than you expected. You just wanted to enjoy seeing the boys in work mode for once, but instead, here you are on your way back to the hotel, utterly furious. 

You couldn’t believe Jungkook and the way he was acting. His comments were suddenly snarky and always towards you. He wasn't acting like the best friend he claimed to be. Maybe he just needed to get laid, but you did not need that image in your mind now.

He was very secretive about his girlfriend, and maybe he needed a good fuck. You couldn't believe he said that to you in front of all of the boys, especially Taehyung.

Yes, you were mad at him and wanted to murder him, but the thought of Jungkook needing his girlfriend causes your chest to tighten and a weird feeling to fill you. 

You shouldn't feel like this. It's not okay. 

You keep trying to control the roller coaster of your thoughts as you finally reach the hotel and quickly make your way back into the shared suite.

Throwing yourself onto the couch, you suddenly feel guilty about ruining Jungkook's look right before he was meant to go out. The stylists must have been so stressed having to get him ready. They would have to fix his makeup, redo his hair, and probably give him a new outfit.

You had no doubt in your mind that he was very pissed, but his reaction was priceless. He sat there, his mouth open and eyes wide like a deer stuck in headlights. He didn't expect you to have the guts to do it, that was for sure.

Well, if you couldn't watch the show in person, maybe you could watch it live on tv instead. Getting yourself comfy, you switch on the television and flip through the channels until you finally land on the broadcast.

You feel a little bit better when your eyes fall on Jungkook's figure, noticing that he was still wearing the same outfit. 

It was as if nothing had occurred backstage, and he looked terrific and entirely relaxed as he answered the different questions aimed at him. It was crazy how quickly his persona changes from when he's backstage to when he's on shows. 

"Jungkook," your eyes focus on the boy, his head flashing up at the mention of his name. His large doe-eyes come to focus on the screen, the camera focusing on his reaction as the interviewer asks him a question.

”I hear that your fans like to write stories about you. Have you ever read any of them?”

The lady smiles widely, clearly interested in the answer, or maybe Jungkook himself. You watch as his cheeks heat up, obviously caught off guard by the sudden question. 

"Um..no haha. I wouldn't want my fans to feel embarrassed by my snooping around. I feel like it’s intruding on their personal thoughts," Jungkook says awkwardly, yet smoothly enough for him to pass the question.

 The boys around him laugh at his sudden shyness, and you can't help but let out a little giggle at his cuteness.

You had no idea what was going on. Why did he seem like your old Jungkook here? You were looking at your former best friend — the one who you saw a lot more before he left on tour and before he met his girlfriend.

You were tired of bumping heads with the new Jungkook, and you were tired of the teasing and rude comments he made each time. Each comment he made felt like he was taking a piece of you with him, knocking down the strength and confidence you had fought so hard to build.

"Well, that's all the time we have for today, folks. Thank you for tuning in," the interviewer smiles before the show ends with their closing goodbyes. 

You let out a deep sigh as you realize you had missed their entire interview. If only you and Jungkook could find a middle ground, things would be more comfortable. 

Taehyung played a massive part in what had happened earlier. He knew what he was doing and just pushed the situation into overdrive. 

You could only wait until the boys returned, and you weren't looking forward to it. 

Jungkook may look all cute with his bunny smile on tv, but you knew once the cameras were off and he was back, he'd return to his previous self.

Chapter 07

❥ Don’t forget to like, comment and reblog! I love to hear your thoughts 💙✨

❥ If you would like to be added to the taglist for future fics/series, please fill out any of these forms! ✨

Taglist: @barbellastyles98 @theresasaysthis @makemebts @im-a-space-child @marvelstuck @httpjazel @vidaficrecs @lidda @drunkzseok @yeontanie21 @nomimits7 @acc3ssdenied @alwaysasadaesthetic @bunnybearrj @alice-jane @mwitsmejk @starbtslove @callmejimmeo @enchantingbrowneyedgirl @bjoriis @jems24 @chimchimmarie @svftbaby​ @sweetonkookieandtae @harmonic55 @lidda @n4mina @scuzmunkie @burnahtsw @taebae19 @rjsmochii @driftapart @mak7sstuff @shellyyy177 @hehurst23 @nclzen @exfolitae @taekimtaekimtaekim89

--------------------------------

“Is that code for fucking?” you had laughed.

He took a sip of his beer and licked the foam from the top of his lip before he leaned over the table closer to you. “If I wanted to fuck, you would know,” he said with a straight face and his eyes sharp.

“Besides,” he huffed, leaning away from the table and settling back into his chair.

“You’re not really my type. No offense.”

He then proceeded to look around the restaurant, eyeing the remaining staff that sat to have a drink before cleaning the rest of the tables and floors for the night. His eyes settled on leggy Sheila and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

You were all the way offended. I mean you weren’t trying to sleep with the dude, yet. But you thought he may at least consider you fuckable if not attractive. And sure, Sheila was pretty, you wouldn’t consider her pretty like you, but what she did do was sleep with the half the male staff.

“It’s cool if you don’t want to, I just thought we vibed and everything, so...”

“Nah, it’s cool. I wouldn’t mind hanging out,” you interrupted, chugging the rest of your drink before excusing yourself to the restroom.

And from there, the two of you did hang out.

You showed him some popular nightclubs and bars in the city that played music. You had your share of getting way too drunk and having to call an Uber home for one another. When you threw a party, you invited him to your house and introduced him to your friends. And soon enough he was part of your weekly tribe.

When you would see him at work the two of you would have your inside jokes about the wild antics from the night before and who you brought home. You gave each other shit for the beer goggles that you wore the night prior and would tumble into laughs with tears rolling down your faces and your stomachs aching.

The two of you had gone to the movies and had been low-key and just watched dumb shit on Netflix together, casually falling asleep on one another’s couch only to wake up and grab a greasy breakfast at a restaurant nearby.

So when he hit you up about hanging out tonight, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Jungkook was your friend. Your really, really hot friend.

-

“Sup, Pea Head,” you greeted when he walked through your door with a case of beer.

“Hey, No Nut,” Jungkook bounced back as he walked toward your kitchen comfortably and plopped the case of beer on the counter.

“Okay, you were calling me Sliced Bread yesterday, why the sudden change,” you asked as you made grabby hands toward him so he could hand you a beer.

“Well, I knew your love life was pretty boring. But I had no idea you hadn’t orgasmed with anyone the whole year.”

“The fuck?” you splutter out as beer foamed out of your mouth. You hastily used the hem of your shirt to wipe your mouth.

“What?” he asks innocently, eyes big and round as a smile danced on his lips which he tries to conceal as he brings the beer up to his lips.

“Why do you think I haven’t orgasmed in a year?” you question as you hit him in the arm. He hardly budges, and fuck now your fist hurts as well as your ego.

“I didn’t say you haven’t orgasmed at all. I said you haven’t orgasmed at the hands of someone else.” He replies cooly, putting his elbow on the counter.

Jungkook looks around suddenly and begins sniffing the air.

“What are we eating? I’m fucking hungry.”

“All you think about is eating,” you scoff as you walk around him and pull the roasted chicken out of the oven.

“Well, I can’t argue with you there, but pussy is on my brain like at least fifty percent of the time too,” he hums as you hear him walk over to the kitchen table.

“You could at least be a gentleman and ask me if I need help,” you chide as you put the roasting pan on the stovetop.

“Hmm, being a gentleman is overrated.”

And this is how your friendship went with Jungkook. He would call you out on your bullshit and you would call him out on yours.

---------------------------------------

“So how are things going with Big Tits?” you ask as you plop down a Skip turn card and then quickly a green 8 onto the Uno deck. “Uno”

“Nothing is going on. Her name is Sarah by the way,” Jungkook informs, as he throws out a blue 8.

“Oh. I thought she was still sucking your dick,” you murmur as your lack of eights and blue cards cause you to pull two cards until you find a yellow 8 card.

“Nah. She hasn’t been around for a while. Actually, I haven’t slept with anyone in a month. What about you,” Jungkook asks as he throws a yellow card onto the stack and then begins humming to the tune playing in the background.

“People are dumb. And so it makes them highly unfuckable for me. So it’s been pretty quiet down below,” you state as you look at him and see that he’s watching you as you throw down a draw four card.

“Green, uno” you announce again.

“So you haven’t cummed, No Nut.”

“Who the fuck told you this, Jungkook?” you ask as you abruptly get up and head to the kitchen for more beers.

“Lacy. She told everyone after service last night when I helped with close,” he calls out.

“Fucking Lacy! I tell her one fucking thing when I’m drunk and she spills like a fucking teapot,” you fume as you step back into the living room and angrily set a beer in front of him.

“So it’s true.” He says looking up at you as you get re-settled back across from him.

You don’t say anything, you just stare at him and he stares at you.

“No, I haven’t orgasmed with anyone. Only alone,” you huff as you pop open the ice-cold beer.

“Ever?” He guffaws as he slams down a green card.

“Ever.” You reply, putting your last card down -- a wild card.

When you look up at him, he’s smiling widely and you can’t help but think about how cute he is.

“Jungkook, you just fucking lost. Again. Why are you cheesing so hard?”

“Uno isn’t my game,” he shrugs as he throws down his hand and picks up his beer. He pops it open and takes a big gulp as his eyes focus on you, a smile spread across his face.

“Okay, what game do you want to play now? I have Connect Four, Scrabble,” you ask, fingers wiggling into a bag of gummy worms, securing two and jamming them inside your mouth.

“How about we play how many times I can make you cum,” he says easily and you nearly choke on the sweet candy melting in your mouth.

You thump your fist to your chest as you look over at him. His face is eerily serious and his tongue comes out to swipe at the corner of his lips. His warm eyes are now dark and raking slowly down your body.

“Are you fucking drunk, Jungkook?”

“Y/N, you have seen me lit... countless of times now. Do I look or sound drunk?”

You take a minute to study him. It’s true, he doesn’t look drunk. He looks completely sober.

“I really don’t know where this is coming from,” you chuckle, trying to dissipate the awkwardness that has filled the room.

“Can I be honest?” he asks, drawing one leg to bend at the knee as his elbow settles onto it to support his weight.

“Yeah,” you whisper, taking another timid sip of your drink.

“So when Lacy shared that no one has ever made you orgasm. I was beyond shocked. I mean look at you...who wouldn’t take the time to watch you fall apart?”

You feel heat rush from your stomach and up to your face. The room suddenly feels too hot and it doesn’t help that his eyes have not left your form. His eyes are bouncing from between your eyes and down your chest and up again.

It’s hard to make you feel uncomfortable in your own home, but you do right now. Uncomfortable because the possibility of fucking Jungkook is thundering through your head.

You laugh again to try to get him to break whatever practical joke he was playing on you.

“What’s so funny?” He asks, tilting his head slightly.

“Do you not find me attractive? Have you never thought about fucking me? ”

Your eyes go wide in surprise.

“Uh, no Jungkook, that’s not it at all,” you say as your eyes examine his face and then instinctively to his veiny strong hands and then his equally firm forearms, tracing the tattoos scattered there.

“Then what is it then? Let me see if I can make you cum,” he shrugs and then places his beer onto the coffee table.

“Jungkook, we are friends.”

“Uh-huh, I know. Friends help friends,” he says as his hand moves to the end of the coffee table.

“It’s a shame no one has ever made you cum.”

“But I’m not your type,” you utter, remembering the bruising statement he said months ago when you first getting to know him.

By the way, he did fuck Sheila. After Jungkook fucked Sheila, she quit the restaurant weeks later during dinner service when she saw Jungkook flirting with a bunch of women who were there for a bachelorette party.

“You remember that huh,” he asks, breaking into a grin and lifting his pierced eyebrow.

His hand pushes on the edge of the coffee table and it begins to slide across the floor, opening a space between Jungkook and you.

“I lied. You kinda shook me when you called me out about wanting to fucking you when I asked you to hang out, but I’m not gonna lie anymore,” Jungkook pauses and his eyes again begin tracing your body and it feels like he’s mapping you out.

“But I did lie that day. You are one hundred percent, my type. More type than Big Tits or Sheila.”

You gulp as he leans over and plucks your beer out of your hand. There’s nothing that is keeping your body temperature from rising hotly between your legs at this point.

“Will you allow me to at least try to make you cum?” He asks setting your beer out of the way.

“Jungkook, I don’t know how we got here. And you seem very confident in your,” you fling your hands in the air as your brain racks for the right word. “Abilities.”

“Y/N, I like you. I think you’re a lot of things but I can’t deny you are sexy. I would love to make you cum. I think I could do it and I do have a good track record,” Jungkook confesses as his tongue works the corner of his mouth.

“A good track record? Like you’ve made people cum before and you’re certain about this?”

“I am. I just know. I mean many of my partners tell me how many times they cum, but I usually can tell.” Jungkook shares, licking his lips more and his eyes glance down to between your legs and then back up to your mouth.

“What’s your best score?”

“Best score?” Jungkook scoffs, hand slapping his thigh.

“How many times have you made someone cum in one night?”

“Do you need to know this?” he reasons.

“Yes, I need it….for research,” and you both begin cackling at the statement -- the phrase was used too much between your inside jokes.

Jungkook wipes the tears, from the corner of his eyes, “That’s why I like you Y/N, you’re funny and sexy.”

His statement has you sobering up and you feel butterflies flutter in your tummy.

“I’ve made someone cum four times in one night. That’s not huge, but I try to at least pull two from a partner.” Jungkook is staring at you as his fingers drum erratic beats on his thighs.

You can’t help but be curious about his techniques to get someone to orgasm. Many have tried and all have failed. Your body is willing to give it a shot, if anything at least you can say you tried.

But your brain is telling you that this is a bad idea. Jungkook is your friend. Would this make it all confusing later? Would you still be friends?

“Jungkook-”

“Y/N. Don’t overthink it. Just say yes. Let me try to please you,” Jungkook says suddenly, eyes wide and pleading.

After a few moments that feel like eternally, you finally muster up the courage to say, “Ok.”

And once you do he’s crawling to close the space between you and you feel your desire heighten. Suddenly he’s close enough to smell and almost close to taste. His smile is playful yet his eyes are burning black.

“Don’t worry, we will work our way up okay?” He whispers as his thumb brushes your cheek and you nod in response. You don’t know what he means by that, but you’re willing to follow his lead.

The smile on his face widens before he’s leaning in and pressing his lips to yours. Instantly, you regret not kissing him sooner. His lips are addicting and they move softly against yours, his tongue asks for entrance, which you promptly open for him, earning a moan from him.

“You’re gonna be fun and sweet,” Jungkook murmurs against your lips as his fingers toy with the hem of your shirt.

“Fuck, wait. Can we move this to your bedroom? I think it will be easier to make you cum if you’re comfortable,” Jungkook says, pulling back suddenly, looking into your eyes.

“Sure, yeah,” you agree as you stand on wobbly legs with Jungkook’s help. You pull down on your t-shirt as his fingers intertwine with yours. And he must notice your insecurity because he grabs your waist and pulls your back to his front.

“You look beautiful, as always Y/N,” he says placing a soft kiss on the back of your head.

“Let’s get you comfortable.”

------------------------------------------

As you enter the bedroom you go to sit on your bed and Jungkook stops you. His hands land on your hips and his lips are back onto yours. Tongue entering easily into your mouth, it glides against your tongue and you feel your knees weaken further.

His hand grips the hem of your T-shirt before he’s tugging it up and over your head as he breaks the kiss for merely a second before his lips find yours again.

Jungkook is working his lips over your neck and chin, making your need to be filled to rise in your cunt. His knotty fingers trace patterns on your waist as his wet lips meet yours again and his tongue deepens into your mouth hungrily.

Just when you are getting lost in the taste of him, Jungkook pulls back and looks at you as his fingers hook into the waistband of your shorts.

His thumbs trace the skin under the waistband and he stares into your eyes as his chest is heaving up and down with lust and not exertion.

“Can I remove these? He breathes, as one hand moves down to your pussy and cups it easily.

“Fuck you’re not wearing panties?” He groans as his pupils blow wide open as his fingers trace the seam sitting beneath your crotch.

You shake your head. “You can take them off only if you take your clothes off first.”

“Fuck, not a problem,” he states confidently.

Jungkook steps back from you and pulls his shirt over his head and your mouth waters instantly. You are met with inches and inches of taut lean muscles wrapped in golden tan flesh laced with pretty drawings. And you feel yourself grow incredibly wetter between your legs.

When he goes to remove his sweatpants, your brain almost launches into feral mode. The man isn’t wearing underwear either and his cock is swollen and pretty, but you can tell he’s not fully hard, not yet. And on the head of his cock are four shiny tiny balls. And that fact alone has you stuck in place.

“What’s that?” you ask gesturing toward his dick.

“Oh, these?” He volleys back as he looks down at his hardening cock and rubs around his frenulum lazily. “It’s a magic cross piercing. I have had it for a few years.”

“Have you never seen one?” he asks cocking an eyebrow at you as his tongue runs between his top and lower teeth.

“No...Did it hurt?”

He looks up at you and smiles slightly. “It did,” he confesses, nodding.

“But my pain will be your pleasure,” Jungkook states matter-of-factly.

“C’mere babydoll,” Jungkook sighs as his hand loosely strokes his hardening cock as he gets on his knees before you and begins sliding down your shorts as he keeps his eyes on yours.

It’s not until your shorts are pooled around your feet does he let his eyes wander down your body and land on your pussy. He groans when his eyes take in the trimmed pubic hair covering your mound.

His hands wrap around your ass and he takes both cheeks into his grasp and squeezes them as his nose buries between your legs.

“Fuck, you smell good babydoll. Spread your legs wider for me,” Jungkook murmurs as his mouth begins to plant soft kisses on your pelvis. You part your thighs as his hand works up and unclasp the bra you’re wearing.

As his hands knead your breast tenderly, you widen your stance, and Jungkook’s tongue moves to your clitoris hood and begins laving it gently, making sure to include the pubic hair around it and you can feel yourself grow wetter and wetter.

The hands cupping on your breasts move to your nipples and pinch and tug as his tongue presses fastly against your hood and begins to move up and down at a precise pace.

“Can you cum like this?” He asks, pulling off of you and looking up at you as his tongue picks up its pace.

“Uh, I dunno...I think so,” you moan.

And the truth is, you’ve only orgasmed while rubbing your clitoris. The whole inside thing was lost on you.

“We’ll see,” he drools against you as his tongue keeps its pace on your pussy.

And his eyes stay stuck on your face even though you are fighting between screwing them shut and looking down as he feasts on your pussy. His nails begin digging into the flesh of your thighs and you bite your lip at how good the pain contrasts the pleasure.

Your breath is ragged and you can feel hot liquid running down your legs and you are not sure if it’s your juices, Jungkook’s saliva, or both but you feel so fucking wet. And your clit is throbbing, he’s not even rubbing it directly but it’s vibrating and you can feel your legs shaking with the effort to support your weight.

“Mmmm,” he hums against and your legs begin to shake greater. You tense your legs and try to stop them from their trembling, but fail.

“Don’t fight it babydoll, let it go” he says as his fingers move up to pluck at your nipples and his mouth wraps around to skin at the valley of your mound, slurping on the hair and skin there as his tongue continues to work your clitoris hood up and down.

And your pussy clenches up and you feel pleasure throb through your folds and your stomach floods with warmth. Your legs shake so bad that they threaten to give out, but before you drop to your knees, Jungkook’s hands grab you and angle you to the bed. You moan loudly as your body rattles with ecstasy, you are moaning and writhing on the bed as Jungkook watches you.

“That’s good. Real good, babydoll” he hums as you watch him through blissful eyes.

He’s moving toward the bed and his cock is rigid and deep purple. But he’s not touching it. Only looking at you.

“One down, three to go,” he hums as his lips meet yours again. And before you know his fingertips are at your entrance. They are swirling around gathering your honey as his lips chase the taste of yours. His tongue is full of your essence and he sweeps it languidly into your mouth as two of his fingertips dip into you, making you buck into them, pushing them further inside you.

“Fuck babydoll, you’re so fucking sensitive,” he whispers against your mouth before his teeth bit your bottom lip and his fingers plunge deeper into your cunt.

His other hand not in your pussy slides up your waist and land on your shoulder, pressing you deeper into the mattress. His fingers in your cunt, twist and hit a spot in you that has you moaning loudly instantly.

“There it is,” he declares, as his hips drop down on you and keep you from moving.

“What the fuck Jungkook?” you pant, squirming under him.

He chuckles before he’s kissing you again.

“Babydoll, this next orgasm may feel different,” he confesses as his finger begins massaging inside you and you can’t move. It feels too good to move away. And part of you wants to say enough but another part of you wants to see where his fingers lead you.

“Feel good babydoll?” Jungkook asks as his teeth nip into your earlobe and his fingers pick up in rubbing and stroking.

“Shit yeah, Kook,” you admit. Instantly you hear him groan and his tongue is wiggling back into your mouth as his hips begin to work against you and his cock begins to stroke against the skin on your stomach.

“You’re so fucking soft,” he growls as his thumb flicks your clit and you feel your pussy quiver around his fingers.

“Ah yeah.Two down. Two to go,” Jungkook grunts before he’s is kissing you messily and flicking his thumb against you repeatedly.

And at first, you are confused, but then his fingers swivel inside you and that’s when pleasure fills your belly and a sharpened pleasure takes hold, causing you to wail his name and clamp down on his digits.

“Shit,” Jungkook sighs as he watches your face intently.

“I knew you would look so fucking good cumming. Spill it babydoll,” he orders as his thumb keeps flicking against your bud.

After a moment your body and brain are processing again. Jungkook removes his fingers from your wet heat and he’s jamming them into his mouth, licking at them hungrily as his eyes eat you up.

“Just two more left,” he growls.

With that statement hanging in the air, Jungkook moves quickly, spreading your legs wide. So wide that it feels like your legs will break at the hip like a doll.

“Can I feel you?” he asks, eyes on yours as his cock presses against your entrance. You feel one of his piercings resting against your clit and it makes you shudder.

“Jungkook...you don’t have to...you already made me cum,” you whisper.

“Oh but I want to do it again,” he murmurs, hips shifting deeper down into you and his cock pressing deeper into your pussy. He’s not all the way, but his tip has a taste of your heat.

You can see he’s affected by the feel of you. His eyes are lidded, but they are focused on you. Your fingers reach for his biceps and you feel them shaking under your touch.

“Let me see you cum on my cock,” he whispers, lips coming down to meet yours and cock budging deeper into your entrance.

“Okay,” you breathe.

It takes him but a moment to register your words before he’s inching forward. His cock is breaching into your entrance. But what makes you dizzy is the coolness of his four-ball piercings dragging up against your walls which has you moaning loudly and arching your chest up into him.

“Fuck babydoll. You like my cock?” Jungkook asks when his dick keeps sliding up against you slowly.

“Uhhh,” you gasp out.

One of his hands slithers under your lower back. When his dick is fully seated in you, he kisses your nose and waits for you to open your eyes and look up at him.

“Are you ready for number three?” he asks, a smug smile sitting on his lips.

You instinctively roll your eyes and right when they are about to land back on him, Jungkook is pulling out of your cunt and slamming back in. And you scream, loudly.

“Shit!”

“Are you ready?” He asks again, the smile wiped from his face. All that sits there is a serious line drawn across his lips.

You nod your head and instantly Jungkook is pounding in and out of your pussy. And you are overwhelmed by the number of things flooding your senses.

Jungkook smells like sex. He’s sweaty and his pheromones are nothing but masculine and raw. You turn your head to bite into his wrist which only fuels him further, but before he began pounding into you further, your tongue picks up on his taste which was salty and sweet like caramel.

And fuck he sounds so good as he fucks up into you. He is grunting and whispering your name and telling you how fucking good your pussy feels that you almost want to pinch yourself that you are having sex with someone who sounds as pornographic as him.

If looks could kill, you would be dead. Jungkook looks like a man on a mission. His eyes stay focused on your face. He doesn’t screw them shut as he thrusts into you feverishly. No, every stroke he watches to see how you react. And you have never felt as seen during a sexual encounter as you did right now.

It is etched on his face that this was all about you, your pussy, and your pleasure.

His touch was experimental. Jungkook’s cock didn’t stay in one place, well not at first. He was switching up angles. And the moment a certain stroke earned a loud moan out of you he stayed there and if that moan turned into a whimper he switched angles. It was obvious he was looking for the right place that would make you scream.

It only took him a few moves to find that spot and when he did, you found yourself scrambling away from him. Clawing up the bed like the man was trying to murder you with his dick.

When you first backed away he looked amused.

“What are you doing?” he asks as his cock left your pussy with a squelch from your movement. You backed up toward the headboard on your ass.

“I can’t Jungkook,” you pant, hand covering your pussy.

“What do you mean?” he questions, his voice deep as he creeps closer to you slowly, looking like he didn’t want to scare you away.

“I can’t..” you looked around the bedroom for an answer but one wouldn’t come to you.

“You can’t what...cum?” He further questions, crawling faster to you and his hands reach out to you

You dodge his hands, moving to the left of your big bed. “I just can’t. It’s too much.”

Jungkook pauses as he takes in your naked form. “Is that why you can’t cum with others? Because it’s too much?”

Your teeth bite into your cheek as you glance at your bathroom, thinking about a plan to get away.

The truth is you were scared to cum like that in front of someone. You were scared of what they would think. You also had never felt like this. And honestly, you liked Jungkook way too much than you thought you did.

“I just don’t think you want to see me like that.”

Jungkook scoots closer to you, hard dick bobbing up and down as he does. Instinctively, you back away.

“Are you fucking kidding me? Babydoll, I’ve been wanting to make you fall apart since I met you. And you asked me to make you cum. Are you backing out already?”

You look at him and see his cock wet with your juices and his body is covered in the sheen of sweat, a sign of all that he has done to already give you two orgasms.

And the truth of the matter is, his nicely pierced-shaped dick was delivering pleasure you didn’t even know existed. It complicated things for you.

“I do want to cum, but-”

Before you could finish, Jungkook’s hand lands on your ankle and suddenly he’s yanking your body down onto the bed and closer to him.

“C’mere. Let me make you fall apart again.”

He positions himself and this time he takes no time re-entering. His hands hold your waist down and his piercings begin rubbing your walls deliciously. You immediately begin squirming away again, feet digging into the mattress inching up the bed, but he just stays with you.

Jungkook’s hands land on the bed and he’s pushing up into you as you begin moving away from him.

“I’m not done making you cum yet. I want more of you. Don’t leave,” he husks as he pounds into you, his cock dragging against you in irregular patterns because you cannot lay still.

Soon you find yourself caged at the headboard. Your back is against the headboard and Jungkook takes the opportunity to dive down to your breasts as he fucks harder into you, making you scream again. His teeth tug on your nipples and you scream, but even over your screams, you can hear how wet you are. Wet noises are coming from your pussy every time he slams back into you.

“Fuck Y/N, you got the tightest pussy ever,” he grunts as he licks up your neck. Your eyes are rolling back into your head as your pleasure beings to mount. You can feel your pussy clamping around him as his cock tugs in and out of you at a relentless pace.

You hear him grunting and you hear him whisper, “C’mon, give me another.” And so you do, you fucking cum all around him. Your fingernails dig into his back and your head falls forward onto his shoulder and your teeth take purchase in the flesh.

He hisses a “yes,” but his pace never falters as you tremble and shake around him.

As you recover, you hear yourself saying “Wait, wait, wait, too much.”

Jungkook pauses and pulls away from you, drawing his cock from your spasming entrance that it has you moaning loudly as your eyes screw shut again.

When you open your eyes, Jungkook is sitting with his knees tucked under him. His cock is glistening with cum and his hair is slick with sweat. A few bangs have fallen over his eyes and he takes a moment to push them off of his forehead.

He doesn’t say anything, just regards you silently as both of your heavy breathing fill the air.

“Uno,” he husks, tongue coming out to lick his lips.

“What?”

“Uno, just one more orgasm. Think you can handle it,” Jungkook asks cocking his eyebrow at you.

”You looking so fucking good when you cum. I gonna think about it later when I jerk off.” he states simply.

Your heart is hammering in your chest. Your mouth is dry and your whole body is still trembling.

Jungkook holds out his hand to you and you take it tenderly. He smiles at you easily and is pulling you to him, lips pressing against yours and you wrap your arms around his neck, returning the kiss feverishly.

No one has ever been so attentive to your body like your friend Jungkook. No one. And you didn’t feel an ounce of judgment from him.

His arms wrap around your waist and he’s yanking you closer to him. You attempt to push him down on his back and you are met with resistance. You pull away from the kiss and look at him shyly.

“Do you want me to ride you?” You whisper.

He bites down on his lower lip as he shakes his head no.

“No...can I continue to take care of you?” he asks looking deeply into your eyes as his hands run up and down your waist.

After a moment of you not answering, he reaches around you and begins pulling the pillows down toward the two of you.

“Can you lay on your stomach on these?” He asks as he arranges them just so.

You nod and turn around to do as requested.

“God babydoll, you have such a beautiful body,” Jungkook sighs as his hands land on your ass and paws at them.

“Do you like to be spanked?” He asks as his mouth meets one of your shoulders, his cock nudging as one of your ass cheeks.

“I don’t know...never had anyone do it. We can try though...you can try,” you say fastly as your face burns with embarrassment.

“So fucking cute too,” he murmurs as you watch him straighten up behind you. His abs tensing and you swear you never have been with a hotter man in your life.

Jungkook looks at you and smiles before you see his hand rear back and smack into your ass hotly. You mewl and can’t keep from wiggling your hips, your thighs rubbing together as your pussy throbs in response.

“You liked that,” he states before smacking your ass again.

Before you can process the stinging sensation on your bottom, you feel his studded tip rubbing at your entrance as his body crowds yours again. His hands planting on either side of your shoulders.

“Alright, enough talking. Let me put in work,” he announces as the head of his dick breaches your hole again. And for fucks sake you just had him in you minutes ago, but this time feels different.

His cock feels more swollen in this position. It is instantly finding the tender spot inside your pussy and one of the studs is grinding against it eagerly.

“Ohhh fuck Jungkook, oh fuck,” you mewl, head keeling back and landing onto his shoulder.

“Hmmm,” he says as his cock retreats and then advances again. His pace is different this time as well. It’s slow and purposeful. Each thrust is as strong as the one prior.

“Faster, please. Please,” you beg.

He moves quickly and straightens up once more, his hands land on the globe of your ass and his pace quickens, his hips begin smacking into your cheeks earnestly and you think you will be bruised for days.

Jungkook doesn’t say much, but he’s groaning and panting. His cock is throbbing in you and you look over your shoulder and his eyes meet yours immediately. His hand smacks down on your ass and you scream his name loudly.

“Fuckkk,” he drawls out as his hands pry your cheeks apart. You hear him spit and then feel it between your cheeks.

“I’m gonna cum soon,” he warns, his voice gravelly and low. His thumb is at your rim and he smearing his saliva around it.

“Do you think you can cum with me?” he asks as his thumb wiggles into your puckering hole and your brain stalls. The ability to form words is lost, all you can do is moan loudly and clench around him.

“Shit, babydoll, I’ll take that as a yes,” he moans as his cock bulldozes into you and you clutch the pillows propping your hips up.

“I’m gonna cum,” you squeal, but it quickly turns into a wail as your climax tweaks through you and you feel Jungkook mutter, “Sorry,” before removing his cock from your clamped walls and his thumb from your hole.

You feel the first few drops of his blazing hot cum spurt down your ass and force yourself to turn to witness the sight of him cumming and you moan loudly as you see more of his milky fluid shoot out of his pierced cock as his mouth hangs agape as his head tilts toward the ceiling. His Adam’s apple is bobbing in his throat and his chest is dripping with sweat.

His eyes open slowly and he looks down at the mess he created and his hand comes up and spreads his jizz over your ass, a satisfying hum escapes from his mouth. His crystal clear eyes meet yours and he smiles at you.

“Shit, I’m sorry I couldn’t stay in you as you came on that one,” he mutters, his cheeks flushing pink and shyly looking down at his cock.

“It’s okay,” you whisper hoarsely, suddenly feeling shy yourself.

“Uhh, I’ll get something to clean you up, one sec,” he says as he crawls off the bed and makes a beeline toward your bathroom.

You shift awkwardly on the pillows below you and bring your hands up to your face to bury your embarrassment.

You hear Jungkook clear his throat before he’s wiping up his seed from between your cheeks and around your pussy. You turn around to face him when the wet towel leaves your skin and you see him regarding you carefully.

He stands beside the bed with an uncertain look covering his face and you’re not sure what to say, but you speak the first words that run through your mind.

“Thank you Jungkook.”

His face breaks with a bright smile, his dimples coming into full display, but he nods solemnly.

“It was my pleasure Y/N.”

“Do you-” you both say at the same time and you both begin to giggle.

“You go first,” Jungkook offers, his hands deferring to you.

You sit up slowly, not really having a choice. Your body was aching but in a good way.

“Do you want to stay and eat something?”

“I would love to…” he answers quickly before stopping and looking around the room like it’s the first time he has been in it, which he hasn’t.

“But do you think...we could shower first, t-together?” He asks rubbing the back of his neck and glancing toward the bathroom.

You can’t help but giggle at how timid he looks. You don’t think you have ever seen him look so self-conscious.

“I’d like that Countdown Cum Giver,” you tease as you will your legs to scoot your butt toward the edge of the bed.

Jungkook guffaws and offers his hands which you take graciously.

“Now that’s a nickname I could get used to, babydoll,” he shoots back as he pulls you up off the bed and then smacking your ass affectionately.

She nods, almost frantically. She shuts the door, and you can hear the frantic movements of the deadbolt being shifted around before the door swings open again.

“Sure, sure.” She waves you in. “Yes, come on in. Would you like something to drink?”

“Water is just fine, thank you.”

As you enter the house, Martha nods towards the living room seating. You make yourself comfortable as she grabs a glass of water for both you and her.

“Here you go.”

“Thank you.” You smile. “Please, get comfortable.”

You gesture to the couch opposite the one you are on. Waiting until she gets settled in, you review the notes you’ve already made in the file you brought along with you, preparing your pen to take any more notes. You take a deep breath. Hopefully you can get all the information you need to get your foot in the door in this investigation.

“I was hoping to ask you about what exactly happened two nights ago?” you ask slowly.

“Of course.” Her face hardens into a look of determination. “I am willing to answer anything to find my daughter.”

“Thank you. Now, can you describe to me how you found out she was gone?”

Martha sighs, leaning back into the couch. She clasps her hands in her lap and fiddles with her thumbs.

“Well, it was two nights ago, as you said. I had been home after work for a little while, preparing to make dinner for the two of us.”

You nod and tilt your head in curiosity.

“Where do you work?”

“I’m an antique dealer at a pawn shop in the next town over. I work eight to four on the weekdays.”

Martha smiles at the thought of her work. She must seem to really enjoy what she does.

“Okay. And you mentioned ‘the two of us’. Is it just you and your daughter?”

“Yes,” she hums, nodding. “Her father left us when she was little. It’s been her and I since she could walk.”

She looks up at you, waiting for you to ask another question. Instead, you gently nod your head, letting her know she can continue her thoughts. Martha glances back down at her restless hands. She clears her throat, licks her drying lips, and takes in another breath before speaking again.

“Well, I went upstairs to check in on her, and know her plans for the rest of the night. When I made it to her room, she was at her desk, working through the most recent packets for her classes. We had talked for a few minutes before I went back downstairs to continue working on dinner.”

“So you had seen and talked to her before she disappeared?” you ask.

“Yes. She seemed completely fine.” Her brows furrow as she shakes her head slightly. “She never mentioned anything alarming. Her and I have a really good relationship where we try not to hide anything from each other.”

You nod. There is a moment of silence between the two of you as you write down some of the key notes. The only sound being the scratching of the pen against the paper. Your eyes lift up as you finish, nodding again for her to continue.

“I was in the kitchen in the middle of cooking when I heard the radio suddenly playing.” Her head tilts in the direction of the kitchen. Your eyes follow, catching a glimpse of an old radio, weathered from the many years of use. “I thought it was just Ayesha, but when I looked over, the room was empty. I thought it was odd at first, but the damn thing is so old that it will sometimes turn on by itself. I didn’t think anything of it until I realized what it was playing. It was something that I’ve never heard before. We always leave it on one station, so when it does turn on, it’ll play that station. It’s never once changed to a different one.”

Your eyes never leave the radio. Standing up, you walk towards it.

“Is it this one, here?”

“That’s the one.” Martha’s voice is close behind you. She must have gotten up herself as you made your way to the radio. “I had walked over to it to turn it off, but when I got to it, it wasn’t even on in the first place. But, it still kept playing this odd tune. Something like a flute playing through the speakers.”

You study the radio. The bright red paint is wearing off most of the antique. The knobs on the front have been used so much that the sides are worn down enough to see where your fingers should hold them. The glass covering the frequency indicator is slightly scratched when the light hits it just right. You glance around to the back, noting that it had been modified to use the house’s electrical system to stay powered. Though, when you look down at the wall socket, there is nothing plugged in.

“Did you unplug it?”

You glance up at Martha, an eyebrow raised in question. She nods as she looks at the outlet herself.

“Yes. I was trying to get it to stop playing. But nothing changed even after unplugging it.”

“That’s odd.”

Your brows knit together trying to come up with a logical explanation. Maybe the radio has a backup battery for when the power is out, to keep it playing. But when you glance at the back of the radio again, you realize there is no way a battery with enough power of any size could be hidden away.

Leaning down to plug the radio back in, you wait for any sign of electrical problems. Perhaps there was just a short after having it plugged in for so long. You aren’t an expert of the topic, by any means, but maybe if you could find where the problem might be, there would be at least one thing explained away.

“I remember hearing the stories that the folks around here would say about the disappearances,” Martha utters. You lift yourself back up to face her. “You know, the old tale of hearing faint music drift through the air, something that no one else hears but the person that will disappear. I didn’t believe it all at first. Mostly because it was all of the elders saying it, which you know, sometimes they aren’t always in the right space.”

You hum. Even from the short time working on this case, you read and heard most—if not all—the folklore surrounding the disappearances. Martha meets your gaze, a stone cold shiver running down her spine, and a flash of fear in her eyes as she begins to recall what she experienced.

“But there was something that just clicked in me once I realized that I couldn’t turn it off. I knew that it was the Piper’s music. The same music that was in the stories. I can’t tell you how fast I ran back up to Ayesha’s room. I opened her door, hoping that she would still be in there, at her desk. But the room was empty. As if she had vanished into the air. Everything was left like she had just stepped out to use the bathroom or something. The only weird thing about the room was her window.”

“Her window?”

“Yes.” Martha’s voice is stern. “She never has it open during the night. It gets drafty in her room, and the open window doesn’t help. Especially on cooler nights like that night.”

You glance up to the top of the staircase, as far up as you can see from the position you’re in. In the darkness of the upper floor, you can make out the beginning of a door frame just past the top of the last step.

“Is it alright if I took a look in her room?” you ask.

“Yes, of course. Follow me.”

Martha leads you to the staircase, flipping the lightswitch on the wall beside it to light the way. She takes a hesitant first step. Grabbing onto the railing, Martha ascends the stairs with you in tow. The boards creak under the weight, and one stair in particular screeches loudly as if it were shouting in agony. You glance around once you make it to the landing. There are three doors, one of which is wide open, showcasing the simple hallway bathroom. Martha pushes open the door nearest to the stairs.

“This is her room.”

The bedroom is just about as big as the studio apartment you use to live in during your college days. A twin bed is situated in the corner beside the window, its purple sheets crumpled slightly from someone sitting on the edge of the mattress. The closet doors a foot or two away from the foot of the bed. A small desk, papers and books scattered across the surface, sits up against the wall on the opposite side of the room from the window. The chair is pulled out and twisted as if someone had just stepped away from the desk. Your eyes glance over to the window where a light breeze is gently tossing the light purple curtains towards the center of the room.

You take a step into the room, skimming through the contents of the papers on the desk before making your way to the window. You lean down to scan the frame and stick your head outside, memorizing the view. You can see the top floors of the school several blocks down, and the old general store is just down the street from where they live. Pushing yourself back into the room to face Martha, your eyebrows furrow. One brow lifting in question.

“And this is exactly how you found it?”

She nods. She plays with her fingers as she avoids any eye contact with you, barely even looking at any of the things in the bedroom.

“Yes. I didn’t touch a thing. When I saw she was gone, that’s when I came running over to find you.”

“How did you know about me, anyway?” You tilt your head as you ask.

“It’s not that hard to find a new face roaming the empty streets.” Martha shrugs. “My daughter had mentioned about a woman who looked to have been collecting information about the town, so I had assumed that you must have been a reporter or something. And the Jungkook boy has the only place that would make sense to hold a new visitor.”

“I see,” you hum, glancing out the window one last time.

You step closer to Martha with a gentle smile resting on your lips.

“I appreciate you taking the time to answer my questions. I hope that I can give you the answers you need,” you speak with sincerity.

Martha shakes her head, stepping toward you herself and takes your hands in hers. A hopeful look takes over her features.

“No, thank you. I know that you will be able to help this town. I have a good feeling about it.”

“We will find her.”

“Thank you.”

You shove your notes and dead laptop into your backpack. The duffle bag for your clothes lays open on the bed, a couple of items still lounging about.

“What are you doing?”

Jungkook’s sudden presence startles you slightly. He’s very quiet, you’ve come to learn, showing up out of the blue when you least expect it. He leans against the doorframe, arms folded across his chest.

“I’m leaving,” you mumble, still preoccupied with packing to give him anything more than that.

A scoff rings out in the air. You furrow your eyebrows and glance up to where Jungkook stands. A strained smirk is painted on his face. His tongue pushes into the inside of his cheek. “I knew it. You’re just like the rest of them. Promising that you’ll help, only to leave this town in the dust once you get confirmation that we are just a bunch of hopeless cases.”

You quickly stand up from your crouched position on the floor. Getting up in Jungkook’s face to tell him your thoughts has become a lot easier the longer you’ve been here. So when he stumbles back slightly from the sudden close proximity, you feel a sense of pride swell in your chest. Though, you don’t focus much on it as you briefly explain why.

“I need back up. I’ll only be gone for the rest of today, so stop jumping to conclusions. You don’t know how hard I’m trying to keep the promises I’m making.”

Jungkook must have sensed your tenacity as he steps back, raising his hands in surrender before turning away towards the living room.

He wishes you a safe trip back into the big city.

The closer you drive to the town’s borders, the heavier the air feels. It’s as if there is an invisible force field over the town and the energy from it continuously affects you negatively. It doesn’t help that there is a dark storm rolling in over the mountains as you drive away. You can hear the rumbling of thunder from the inside of your car. It’s going to be a big storm.

As your car creeps up to the town boundary, you catch a glimpse of something dark from the corner of your eye. You turn your head to see what it is. Your eyes grow wide. Standing behind the welcome sign to the town, a dark figure seems to wave at you in the shadows. Though it has no distinct features, it looks as if it is grinning widely at you as you pass by. A cold shiver runs up your spine.

“What the f- Shit!”

As you turn back to face the road, a small herd of deer sprint across right in front of you. You have to slam on your brakes to stop you from knocking through the innocent animals. You manage to stop inches away from an unsuspecting dear. It’s frozen in the middle of the lane, staring your frantic form down. Too close for comfort. After taking a moment to catch your breath, you honk, sending the deer into a slight frenzy, and scaring it away. You glance through your rear view mirror at the sign as you start back up again, but there is nothing there.

“Yoongi!”

A head of shaggy brown hair whips towards the sound of your voice. Yoongi’s face lights up as he recognizes who you are. He rushes to stand in front of you, a look of worry taking over his face. He eyes you up and down like a worried mother, looking for any kind of injury.

“Y/N? Where have you been? It’s been a month. Why haven’t you been answering your phone?” Yoongi spits rapid fire questions at you. You both have joked in the past that he should have become a rapper with how fast he speaks sometimes.

Confusion is written all over your face. A month? You had only been working on the case for a week and a half at most.

“No it hasn’t? It’s only been like two weeks.”

“You’re kidding, right?” he scoffs.

“No? My phone’s been dead, but there’s still no way that-”

“Ms. L/N?”

Your eyes light up at the sound of Namjoon’s voice. Turning to face him, you rush out what you needed to ask of him.

“Perfect. Mr. Kim, I need all the help I can get.”

Namjoon raises an eyebrow, a strong gaze watching your every move.

“Are you still working on that case? We have tried everything we can to help that town.” He shakes his head absentmindedly. “There’s nothing else we can do.”

“No.”

Both Namjoon and Yoongi look at you like you’re crazy. Did you just say no to the boss? Taking this case changed you quite a bit. Before, you would have never faced Namjoon the way you are right now. Before, you would submit to whatever Namjoon had told you to do as he would take over and close up most of the cases you worked on. Some of the surrounding employees must have heard or felt the shift in the air as they stare at the three of you without even trying to hide.

“I won’t take that as an answer,” you continue. “I need anybody that I can get. Forensics, paranormal, literally anyone.”

“Look L/-”

“Mr. Kim,” you interrupt.

Your voice is unwavering. Your feet are planted into the floor as if he is trying to knock you down with his words. Your eyes bore into his, trying to get your message through his thick skull.

Namjoon takes in a breath. He closes his eyes, bows his head slightly, and raises one hand.

“Fine. It won’t be very many, since most departments are busy with their own cases, but I’ll let them know. Min, go with L/N.”

A smile creeps up onto your lips.

“Thank you, sir.”

You walk up to the door of Jungkook’s Bed and Breakfast, bags in hand, and Yoongi on your tail. Before you step up to the porch, you turn to Yoongi.

“Be aware that you may not get the warmest of welcomes.”

Yoongi’s brows crease and a small pout forms on his lips.

“What do you mean?”

Without another word, you face forward again and walk up the steps. The front door swings open before you have the chance to ring the doorbell. Jungkook looks at you with a raised eyebrow.

“You call your boyfriend your backup?”

You push through the door, forcing Jungkook to move out of your and Yoongi’s way to get inside quickly. The sun is beginning to set and you didn’t want to stay outside any longer after what happened earlier in the day.

“One, he’s not my boyfriend,” you call out as you walk through the house to get to your room. “He’s got a fiance. Two, there will be others coming tomorrow. Don’t get your panties in a twist.”

You glance back to see Jungkook grumble out something under his breath at your last few words. He takes one quick look at you, then Yoongi, rolling his eyes before speaking at you rather than the person he is referring to.

“He can take the room next to yours.”

Taglist: @jjin-kun​ @rosiekook @joyfulhopelox @lavienjin @swanguk @stanny-uwu @areigahto​ @seokout​ @bonobonoyaaaahh @seajae @sugainmybowl @fluffyjjkk

“Morning,” 

“Morning.” Was the greeting between you and Jungkook every morning when you stepped into the elevator, coffee in hand.

That was it, that was all you ever said to each other anymore. His smell always floated around the confined space making your mind flashback to what once was before you quickly pushed it away from your brain.

Neither of you ever said anything about it, it was like it had never even happened and sometimes you wonder if it even had or if your brain had made up everything that had happened eight months ago from your frequent dirty thoughts of your coworker. It felt like a lifetime ago. The familiarity of him, his smell, his smile, his voice along with the cold distance, avoidance to even look at you, and the constant wonder of him having someone else made you a little sick at your stomach.

You had decided to break things off… as if either of you were any more than fuck buddies. You knew that if anyone at work had ever found out about the two of you, you’d most likely both be fired. No banging other employees was a pretty strict policy there and you remembered the two nice ladies that were fired last year for it, you remembered it because your boss had made such an example of it.

You had been more than paranoid when you and Jungkook were boning for a whole month, you both had been so secretive even going as far as to have each other park down the street from your houses when the other came over. It didn’t help that you lived with your sister and didn’t want her to know you were sneaking someone in the house and screwing them. It also didn’t help that his roommate worked there too and didn’t get along at times. It didn’t seem like all the effort to sneak around was worth it at the time, but now you felt like you had a mistake.

As you took your seat behind the reception desk and began to put away your things for the morning, you just kept stealing glimpses of him doing the same at his cubicle. Every morning he would put his black messenger bag under his desk, turn on his computer, and roll the sleeves of his white button-up shirt up to reveal one very tattooed arm. His wavy hair was usually put back into a half ponytail for professionalism and probably so he could see, but there were always strands that managed to escape his hair elastic throughout the day. It was painful mentally at times having a view of him but trying not to look, it was painful knowing he wouldn’t look back at you anymore. You could still feel what it was like when he had glanced at you and smiled at you, your heart sped up at just the thought. 

“Ugh why are you always here so early, you leave before I even wake up.” his roommate,Jimin, had walked in, looking great as usual but a bit tired in the face. He was lingering around Jungkook’s desk with his things still in hand.

“I like to be prepared, unlike you.” Jungkook joked back with a smile but you knew it was just more than a joke, Jungkook really didn't care for Jimin, he was a bit too spiteful towards him sometimes.

He had always come in early, you both were typically the first ones here besides the janitor. You had to be, your boss liked you here nice and early to greet everyone as they walked in.

“You coming to the thing tonight? The boss is letting us have booze.” Jimin asked him.

You felt like you really shouldn’t be paying attention to the conversation so you went back to sipping your coffee and getting ready to start the day.

“Hey.”

It nearly scared you to death as you rummaged through your bag under the desk for your chapstick. Your body jolted up to see Jimin leaning one arm on the reception counter.

“What?” you asked in confusion, wondering what he was now doing hanging around you with such a sly smirk.

“Well good morning to you too. Are you going to the party tonight? Boss is having a thing to celebrate meeting our yearly product sales goal.”

“I… haven’t thought about it, why?” you were honest, it didn’t mean anything to you.

“I know we have this policy, but you should think about going with me.” he gave you a wink that made you raise your eyebrows in surprise. “We could come here and have a few drinks and a good time, then we could go back to my place and-”

“How about we don’t? We could just not do that.” you gave him a very fake smile.

Sudden loud coughing erupted through the room making you both look over at the source.

Jungkook was doubled over with his coffee still in his hand.

“You good?” Jimin asked him casually and Jungkook gave a thumbs up to show he was fine, even though his big eyes were slightly teary before holding up his coffee cup to signify he had strangled on his coffee.

“Anyway, if you’re worried about someone saying something about us, you could just come separately and we could just see what happens…”

“I’m not worried because there is no us, Jimin. I’ll come, but let’s not see what happens, and let’s not even speak.” 

“Your loss. At least I’ll have Jungkook there with me.” Jimin responded along with a shrug to your savage words before walking away.

You looked over to Jungkook to make sure he hadn’t died because he was no longer choking, you just wanted to make sure he was still breathing but your eyes were met with his. He was giving you this gaze before he raised his eyebrows at you with a slight momentary smirk, it all only lasted less than a split second before he adjusted his black tie and turned back around to face his desk. 

How could he be so casual with a look like that at you? How could he be so casual with everything that had happened between you? You had no idea what that look was about but it had your brain so frazzled. It could’ve been nothing, but it was the most interaction you’ve had with him in so long, all it had done was remind you how starved for him you were.

You looked down at your desk feeling your face get a little warm.

Images of that very shirt he was wearing right now, being unbuttoned rapidly with those tattooed fingers in some dark, sketchy hotel room ran through your mind. 

“I wish you knew how much I’d go through to be this close to you, to be inside of you.” The memory of his words and hushed voice into your skin gave you goosebumps.

The same man who had said that now sat right over there, not even having tried to flirt with you in the past eight months as you sat here and wondered why you do this to yourself. 

Did he still feel that way or had he just meant it at the moment? There were plenty at the moment things that he had said that would flood into your mind just to hurt you when you saw him.

You glanced at him throughout the day as you often did.

You avoided each other on your lunch break, stepping around each other to get to the vending machines in the break room.

You ate at your desk alone while he ate with Jimin in the break room.

Things were the same as they had been, the look he had given you earlier meant nothing, maybe nothing that had happened in the past meant nothing to him too.

Maybe it was all just fun like you both had planned for it to be, if so, why were you still so stuck on it? Why were you stuck on him? You told yourself it was just because he was attractive, the most gorgeous man in the office, but there were just these little things about him you couldn’t get over. The way he stretched and grunted in the morning, you knew the way he liked his coffee, you knew his parents’ names. You had both shared so much of your lives for an entire month almost constantly until you ripped it away from yourself so stupidly. You had both agreed to delete each other’s numbers, but the truth was, you still kept his name in your phone with little hearts by his name. You needed this to end, you needed to stop being so hung up on him because he wasn’t with you. You decided to go to this thing tonight and at least hope for some answers, if you failed to get any you would do your best to stop thinking about him.

------------------ 

You had talked yourself out of this more than five times already, but you had gotten dressed and ready and made the drive over.

You now sat in the office parking lot just picking lint off of your black dress, not looking forward to how awkward this might be. In your years of working there, you had mostly just kept to yourself… until the thing with Jungkook happened.

“Are you nervous? You look nervous” he gave you a little smile from across the table from the coffee shop. He had asked you to get coffee after work and he could see right through you

“A little.” You had admitted.

“Don’t be shy, it’s just me. It’s just Jungkook, we work together every day.”

“Don’t be nervous.” You found yourself saying out loud to yourself as you gazed out your windshield at the building. “I shouldn’t be. I work with him every day and nothings going to happen anyway.” You hurt yourself a little with the last part. You put a lot more care into how you looked tonight than you wanted to admit.

“It’s just a stupid office party,” you grumbled to yourself before unbuckling your seatbelt and getting out of the car, if it was horrible or boring then you could just go home.

-----

You didn’t know what you had expected, but it wasn’t this. You had followed the signs to the floor that had held a large meeting room, but it didn’t look like a meeting room now.

It was just a room full of people with a snack table and alcohol. The room was dimmed but there were some cheap party effects lighting things happening. People were laughing and talking over some pop music that wasn’t eardrum-bustlingly loud but you still had to strain to hear over. You spotted a lot of coworkers you saw every day, more that you didn’t know from different departments though. You kind of just went and stood by a wall with your eyes searching faces, not stopping too long on any just in case they might think you were staring at them. Before you had left you wondered if you had been too dressed up, but now you were glad for your little black dress as you saw what the others were wearing. Everyone looked so nice and not at all what you were used to them wearing. 

While your eyes were going over who was talking to who, you found him.

In the corner of the room on the opposite end, talking to some girl you had only seen a handful of times. She was touching her hair and smiling at him. He looked so dressed down in his ripped black jeans and a black t-shirt. His tattoos were freed as you had always liked seeing and his hair wasn’t being held back. You had seen him like this multiple times, but had anyone else? He had always looked so good like this, so himself. 

Just seeing his hair down reminded you of all the times you had grabbed at it while moaning his name. Seeing him in those black ripped jeans reminded you of all the times he has made you ride his chiseled, hard thighs until you came multiple times. 

You felt like you had been kicked in the heart as your brain went back to the present moment and saw her placing a hand on his shoulder.

He laughed at something she had said but took a step back out of her grasp smoothly before giving her a small wave. A few more words were exchanged before she apprehensively walked away from him, heaving him alone to stand at the wall on the other side of the room.

Your eyes darted away from him and over to the snack and drink table, you weren’t planning on getting any, but you wanted to make it look that way.

You felt nervous, he looked good and at least one other person had noticed. You told yourself that the lady who had just spoken to him didn’t know him as you did, she probably just saw a hot guy dressed in black with tattoos… just like you had when you both had started whatever happened. He was more than all of that, to you especially now after you had a lot of time to think about it all.

Although you didn’t want your eyes to, they had darted to him for a split second to see he had his phone out… until he looked up from it at you.

He had seen you, he had seen you looking at him from across the room, but he didn’t react. Instead, his eyes went back down to his phone, and yours went back to the table.

Your phone buzzed in your bag and you decided to fish it out thinking it could help you look busy.

“Hey, it’s Jungkook. I see you :)”

Your heart nearly jumped out of your mouth as you read the text. 

He hadn’t deleted your number just like you hadn’t his.

You felt his eyes watching you but you didn’t look up. He was waiting for your reply, but you just stood there dumbfounded that he had just sent you a text from across the room.

“I know.” you had nervously typed different versions of this reply over and over only to erase each time before settling on the most simple reply.

“You look good.” it had taken him no time to reply in comparison to you. You stood there in shock and lost as to what to say to him. You were taking too long because he sent a second text.

“I know that dress. I remember it.”

You had been hoping he would. You had worn this dress on the first night you both had ever done anything. You made out in his car after your coffee date. He had just kept telling you how pretty you looked even with his hand in your underwear. It was hard to resist him from even the first date, you had no idea how you had made it eight months now.

“You look nice too, you always have.” You typed and sent it quickly before you could change your mind.

You watched him run his inked fingers through his hair as he read the text. You could swear you saw a flash of a smile on his face before his thumbs went to work on his phone.

“I miss you.” Popped up on your screen.

Part of you felt like crying a little. You felt his eyes on you once again and you looked up away from your phone to see that your feeling had been correct. You were sure your mouth was open as you locked eyes from across the room. Your phone vibrated again in your hand.

“We should talk.”

“Hey, gorgeous!” Jimin stepped in front of you making you lock your phone. “I know you said let’s not talk but-“

“Then why are you talking to me?”

“How could I not? You’re the prettiest one here.” He smirked but you could smell the alcohol on his breath. You couldn’t help the roll of your eyes.

“Oh hey! I’ve been looking for you!” Jungkook now walked up with a smile at you. “You found her for me and didn’t even know I was looking, thanks, man.” Jungkook seemed to be thanking an equally confused as you Jimin.

“Sorry to bother you about work stuff at a party, but I forgot to earlier. I need the contact info to a client I’ve been working on to sell more products to. It’s wild, it’s like I went to the bathroom one day and the info to this big buyer just kinda… disappeared I guess. So weird, almost like someone has it out for me.” Jungkook gave the fakest joking laugh you had ever seen and Jimin looked a bit wide-eyed. “Anyway, You’re the receptionist so I know you have the contact info for everyone anyway so I was wondering if you could maybe help me out and get it for me? It’s kind of really important and I need it ASAP. Already asked the boss and he said it was cool.” 

Jimin had just kind of slinked off silently, but you knew what Jungkook was doing.

“Yeah, Uh of course.” You nodded.

He tilted his head in the direction of the door before you followed him out.

He led you towards the elevator in absolute silence and even as he pushed the button for the floor you both worked on he said nothing.

You were beginning to think he was wanting your help. And then you thought about it more in the silent ride and you felt so stupid. Of course he was wanting your help, he had never said he actually didn’t, not even when Jimin had walked away.

“I can’t believe that asshole sabotaged me like that. My roommate sabotaged my sale.” He mumbled before scoffing as the elevator door opened.

“I-I’ll help.” You said but he passed right by your desk.

“I’m glad you said that.” He replied as he walked over to Jimin’s cubicle.

“What are we doing?” You finally asked.

“Depends…” he raised an eyebrow as he looked back at you. “What do you want me to do?” 

You swallowed the lump of nervousness in your throat to speak as you looked into his mischievous-looking dark eyes.

“Whatever you want I guess.”

He lifted you in almost an instant and sat you on Jimin’s desk.

“You know he’s always liked you, right? He would tell on us if he ever found out. You were willing to risk it, right here right now?” He dared.

Instead of speaking you grabbed a fist full of his t-shirt and tugged him down until his lips met yours.

God did you want it. You have wanted for eight long months. You were willing to risk everything after so long without his lips on yours.

You were still nervous but his kiss brought it all back for you and how natural it felt.

“Fuck me.” You pleaded against his lips.

“You need it? Tell me you need it.” His lips moved to your neck as he ran a hand through the back of your hair.

“Ah, fuck I need it. I haven’t fucked anyone since you.” It slipped out of your mouth and got a second your body went rigid.

“Me neither.” He nipped at your neck.

The second thing he had done tonight that had stunned you.

“Wait.” You stopped him and he backed up to look at you.

“I missed you too. Not just… not just this, I missed you. I don’t know if you feel the same but-“

“What did you think I meant by I missed you? I didn’t just mean the sex or your body. I meant you as a person.” 

“I-why didn’t you just say?” You wondered out loud. 

He dropped to the floor on his knees between your legs.

“Cause you dumped me.” He let out a snort “you told me to delete your number, which surprise, I didn’t. You wouldn’t look at me. Plus this went two ways you know. You didn’t contact me either.” He stated as he looked up at you while ghosting his fingers over the skin of your thighs as he spoke.

“I dumped you?” You were surprised by this news. You know neither of you had had the relationship talk before.

“I mean, I like to think we were together.”

“Then we should be again,” you decided. You were tired of wanting him and not having him and something told you that he felt the same.

“I think so too,” he whispered, inching his lips closer and closer to yours before smashing into them.

His hands squeezed at the meat of your thighs before trailing them up the sides, up under your skirt, and hooking them in your panties. Your tongues whipped together in each other’s mouths. You managed to move so that he could get your panties down, but he only pulled them to your knees. He grabbed your hips and pulled you closer to the edge of the table, so close you thought you might fall off if he wasn’t right there between your legs. 

His fingers now slowly ran from your inner thighs to your folds. As soon as he touched you, you unlocked your lips from his and let out a shaky breathed whine.

“I can tell you missed me. You're so wet for me,” he whispered so quietly just for you to hear even though no one else was in the room.

You did your best to stay quiet as his fingers teasingly and slowly ran over your clit and back down to your cunt.

He lifted his slick fingers to his mouth and you watched with a slightly open mouth as he let them slide past his lips and then out of his mouth altogether, coming out more glossy from his spit.

“I missed the way you taste”

His even more wet fingers that now teased at your pussy were making you want to grab his hand and force it to do something more. You were practically shaking under even the slightest of his touches. You were nervous for someone to walk in at any given moment and all he was doing was drawing things out and letting his fingers kill precious time playing in your folds.

“I'd love to make you cum right now with my mouth” he pressed a kiss onto your neck where his face had been camping out while his fingers tortured you. “But I know how that makes you scream and we have to be very…” another kiss to your neck “very” his fingers finally slowly slipped into your cunt “very quiet.” his whispers tapered off to quieter and quieter, so much so that your shaking breaths felt loud between the both of you.

You were doing your best not to break out into full-blown moans so that maybe if someone walked in you could play it off as just talking or something else, as long as no one heard your moans on the way up the both of you could have time to look normal. 

His fingers curled inside of you with his palm grinding down onto your clit slowly.

“Oh God.” you breathed not knowing how you were supposed to survive this. He was all you wanted for months upon months and now that you had him here, tattooed hand knuckle deep in your pussy, his lips on your skin saying nothing but filth, you felt like you couldn't even let go as much as you wanted to, but you were trying.

His hand sped up its movements as you could feel how hard he was now in his jeans against the inside of your thigh.

Your lips squeezed together but it couldn’t stop the small whimpers he forced out of you. You could hear him breathing in your ear along with the wet sounds of your pussy. You were close but so scared. Doing this out in the open was such a thrill but it also made you paranoid. 

“Cum for me. I hear the way you’re whining, you’re so close I know it. Just cum for me. Cum around my fingers, no one will know.” 

You couldn’t stop it now.

You grabbed a hold of his shirt and forced his chest harder against yours, you wanted him closer, impossibly close as you came undone, clenching around his fingers rhythmically as each wave of pleasure pulsed through your body. 

He let out a little moan at the sound and feel of you coming. 

“I missed that too.” He whispered to himself before pulling his fingers out of you slowly.

He reached between you and you felt him quickly yet nervously fiddling with his button and zipper with his hand that wasn’t soaked in your wetness.

He made a show about taking his thick, veiny cock out of his pants and rubbing your juices from his hand over it. 

In seconds he was back in your ear.

“Can I fuck your brains out?” The whisper was soft, his voice was sweet but the words themselves were as hard as his dick he still stroked in his hand.

“You're always allowed brains out.” You whispered back “just do it.” 

You felt his head run over your folds teasingly as he continued to play with you and himself.

“Do you still think about me fucking your brains out?” He asked. You could hear how much wetness had spread from you to his cock with each pump of his hand.

“Every time I need to get off.” You admitted. “So give it to me so I don’t have to keep wishing anymore.” 

He pushed into you slowly, letting out a deep sigh and throwing his head back for a moment so you could see his perfectly sculpted throat.

You missed how full he made you feel while he was inside of you. 

He pulled out almost entirely, the head of his cock was the only thing left inside of you, pushing on your g-spot before the thrust back in hard. This was the way he fucked, pulling out almost entirely so his head hit where you needed it. You had experienced guys that just flopped around, but he knew you, he knew your body, he paid attention, he had a very special handcrafted way to get you off over and over until you were shaking.

One of his hands grabbed your hip while the other went to your clit to play with using his thumb.

“You miss this, baby?” You miss my dick between your legs?” His lips brushed with your parted and panting ones as he spoke.

You let out a whimper as you focused on your second orgasm, his hips were not letting up and neither was his lips that whispered pure filth.

“Want me to cum inside of you, make you not want to forget me and who you belong to? Right here on Jimin's desk.” 

Your eyes squeezed shut and you clutched at the fabric of his shirt as you were once again thrown into pure pleasure.

You couldn’t help it this time. The way he touched you, the way he felt inside of you, his grunts and words were all too much.

“Please, fucking cum inside of me, I want it all fuck you feel so good.” You cried out way too loudly. 

“Oh my god, fuck.” He breathed through pants as his hips pounded into yours. You felt him release inside of you. Your walls clenched around him upon hearing his long deep guttural moan. 

“I haven’t cum like that in…” he panted before letting out a little chortle of laughter “well in eight months.” 

“So,” there was a loud voice in the room making your heads turn and your stomach’s sink. “You fucked on my desk.” Jimin looked beyond angry as he sat in an office chair across the room with his phone in his hand, pointing it at the both of you. You had no idea when or how he had come in, but you knew you were both beyond physically fucked.

Jungkook had already scrambled to pull out of you and zip his pants back up as you jumped off the desk, pulled your underwear up, and smoothed out your dress.

“That's fine, I have you both on video. I really liked you y/n. Jungkook, Looks like I’m moving out.” he stood from the chair and headed towards the direction of the elevator. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to speak to our boss about this. He probably won't be too happy to see you two are breaking company policy.” 

“Fuck company policy and fuck you! You were an awful friend, roommate and you've always been jealous of me!” Jungkook yelled at him back.

“Not anymore, jobless.” Jimin turned back to give Jungkook a smirk before he stepped into the elevator.

With that, you were both just left there.

“I… I am so so sorry…” Jungkook began apologetically and just as stunned as you were.

“Don’t be, we’re too good for this job anyway, we can find new ones. It looks like you need a new roommate now though.” 

You watched his face as a small smile grew on it.

“Yeah, looking for someone prettier and nicer, maybe someone willing to be my girlfriend? I don't know though, I don’t want to make too many demands.” 

“Well I could meet all of those demands.” you played along. “We won't have to sneak around anymore.”

“Yes, please, yes. I uh- don't want to ruin the cute moment, but I think we should get out of here before Jimin brings the boss up.”

“Oh fuck, right. Uhh, we should probably just never come back too. Let’s just grab our stuff from our desks and make a run for it.”

“Let's go. You know, this is simultaneously the best, worst, most exciting, and most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to me,” he said and you couldn't help but laugh and agree.

With Jimin and Taehyung heading out of the hot tub, it left you and Jungkook some very precious and warranted alone time. The way that moonlight was shining down on you two seem to be beckoning you two closer to each other, but the sexual tension that had built up between the two of you over the day seemed to keep either of you from making the first move.

“Are you wet for me, kitten?” Whispered Jungkook from across the hot tub.

The obvious answer to that question was yes (you’d been wet since Jungkook first peeled off his shirt when he went for an outdoor run in the morning), but you felt like being a brat today.

“Of course I’m wet Kook, we’re in a hot tub,” you said sarcastically, lifting your arms out of the water to show the water dripping off of you, your expression basically saying duh to him.

Smirking, Jungkook rose from his position across from you in the hot tub and walked over. Looking at Jungkook’s figure towering over you, you were waiting for him to touch you. The way that his gaze bore into you made it feel as though you were already naked.

Instead, Jungkook pressed his knee in between yours, pushing your legs apart until his knee was flush against your clothed pussy. You couldn’t help the soft gasp that escaped your lips. He could feel your core pulsing against his knee, demonstrating your excitement at the situation.

Jungkook leaned down to whisper in your ear.

“I’ll ask you again baby. Are you wet for me?”

Desperate to be touched, you couldn’t keep neglecting your needs any longer and began to nod your head feverishly, giving into exactly what Jungkook wanted.

The minute your head nodded up and down, Jungkook pounced on you. Grabbing your chin in his hold, he smashed his lips against yours, itching to feel you close to him. As your lips moved in perfect synchrony, you could feel exactly how excited Jungkook was, as his cock was hard as a rock against your body.

Kissing his way down your neck, Jungkook made sure to savor every inch of exposed skin. The steam coming from the hot tub rose to create a delicate sheen on your body, making you look like a goddess who emerged from the sea. Jungkook took his time as he pressed hickeys into your neck, wanting to make sure that you knew that you were truly his. In that moment, Jungkook was an artist, and you were the most beautiful canvas he had ever painted on.

Without alerting you, Jungkook managed to sneak one hand under the water to cup your sex, replacing where his knee had been just minutes earlier. You gasped in response, and couldn’t help but slightly grind against his palm.

Jungkook chuckled at the sight.

“So needy babygirl. My baby will fuck herself on anything won’t she?”

You whimpered, overcome with need and a desire for anything to help you reach your orgasm. Jungkook made sure to make eye contact with you, and asked one more time. You even verbalized your response, essentially moaning out how desperate you were to get off and how you do anything to get there.

Quickly taking control, Jungkook pulled you up to standing in the hot tub, turning you around so your back was flush against his chest. He took his broad palms and used them to spread your legs open again.

“Ready baby?” He whispered with his mouth perched by your ear, just far enough that you were left yearning for the feeling of his breath on you.

What happened next seemed to happen in a blur, and before you knew it the jets in the hot tub turned on, and one was firing right onto your clit. (You would find out the next day that in true Jungkook fashion, he spent 20 minutes earlier that day trying to figure out the most sexy way he could turn on the jets).

You instantly became a moaning mess in your boyfriend’s arms, and you were eternally grateful that he was there to hold you up as your legs turned to putty beneath you.

“Ah -, oh fuckkkk”

Jungkook pressed a kiss under your ear and held you tighter against him. You could now feel his cock pressing into you, and the friction you were receiving on both sides was making you lose control. He took one hand to undo your bikini top, allowing your breasts to be exposed to the environment and also giving Jungkook full access to groping them. He rolled your nipples in his fingers, pinching them ever so slightly now and then to make you squirm.

“Do you like this baby? You look so fucked out right now and I love it .”

And he was right, if an innocent bystander (or more likely, your friends) even saw you like this, they would see you as a red-faced, panting, moaning mess in Jungkook’s hold. Even without Jungkook even laying a finger on your pussy, you were completely submissive to him and his ministrations.

You could feel the knot in your stomach tightening, and Jungkook could feel it too. He moved his attention away from your nipples and instead brought a hand to your pussy, giving it a slap that had you quaking in his hold. He then inserted a finger into you, making sure the water was still hitting your clit and providing you extraordinary levels of pleasure.

“Cum for me babe, cum all over my fingers.”

Like a genie granting wishes, at Jungkook’s command you felt your orgasm overtake you. You felt your body tingle in Jungkook’s hold as he let you ride out your high on his fingers.

“Do you want my fat cock to destroy you, don’t you babygirl? Is that why you’ve been teasing me all day?”

Pressing a finger to your clit, applying just enough pressure to make you squirm, you moaned in response. Even though you were still recovering from your orgasm, you wanted to feel your boyfriend inside you - knowing his cock was rock hard and probably leaking in his shorts mere inches from you made you want to moan instantly.

“Please kook,” you panted, “w-, ah, want your cock.” You grasped at his swim shorts while your brain was still clouded with your post-orgasm haze, hoping to reach his cock.

As you saw him reach to pull his cock out of his shorts, you bent over, ready for Jungkook to thrust his cock into you. However instead you felt him flip you over, pulling you so you are chest to chest.

In a moment of softness, Jungkook took one hand to caress your face, treasuring the way you looked at him.

He whispered, as if he was worried someone could possibly overhear you over the sound of the bubbles - he spoke as if he wanted this moment to be shared just for the two of you.

“Needed to see you while I destroyed that pussy. Look at me baby.”

Taking one hand to run the length of Jungkook’s toned body, taking in the way he shined under the moonlight. You couldn’t help but gasp as you saw the look in his eyes - they were filled with passion, desire, hunger, and so much more.

The moment the tip of Jungkook’s cock entered you, you both shared a collective gasp. Despite the numerous times that you and Jungkook had fucked, there was always something special about the way it felt to have him buried into you. He slid into you at a torturously slow rate, wanting to make sure you could feel every inch of his dick enter you. You could hear his breath hitch in his throat at every inch, and you were mirroring his actions.

Jungkook wanted you even closer to you, and hoisted you off the hot tub seat into his hold, making sure your chests were flush against each other. You couldn’t help but press a passionate kiss to his lips, wanting to savour this intimate moment.

Without hesitation Jungkook began to drill himself into you, pounding into you at a relentless pace. Overcome with pleasure, you barely could keep your head up and instead laid it in the crook of Jungkook’s neck. Your moans were so loud that you were sure the neighbors could probably hear, but Jungkook was fucking into you so well that your brain felt foggy.

“F-feels so good Kook. Sooooo good,” you moaned out to him. Unconsciously, you clenched around him, eliciting a sinful groan from your boyfriend.

“You feel so good around my baby, clenching around my cock so well like the good girl you are.” He lightly bit your earlobe, increasing your pleasure.

He punctuated his words with every thrust as he continued to whisper dirty, sinful, sweet nothings in your ear. “My good fucking girl. Mmmm. So fucking sexy.”

For the second time that night, you felt the knot in your stomach tighten at your climax approaching.

Jungkook did not let up on his face, pounding into you while grabbing a fistful of your ass in his hands. He could tell you were close too and he wanted to help you reach your orgasm.

“Are you gonna come for me babygirl?”

You couldn’t make any coherent noises and instead nodded your head. Without faltering, Jungkook scooped you up into another kiss and snuck a hand down to your clit again.

“That’s it sweetheart, cum for me.”

The way your pussy clenched around Jungkook’s cock when you came had Jungkook losing his mind, and with a few deep thrusts, he buried himself deep into you as he released his load inside you. Despite being surrounded by hot water, you could feel the warmth of Jungkook’s cum in your body.

He always liked to take his time before he pulled out, just wanting to savor the glorious post-sex feeling that he always had with you. He gently stroked the hair out of your face, cupping your face gently as he pressed a sweet kiss on your forehead. Making sure you were steadily placed on the seating of the hot tub before letting go, Jungkook slowly pulled out (eliciting a groan from both of you in response at the loss of sensation) and took his spot beside you in the hot tub.

As you both came down from your highs, breathless and rosy-cheeked, Jungkook took a glance at the now cloudy water in the hot tub and chuckled.

“So… who’s gonna be the one to tell Jin that his hot tub water is now mixed with cum?”

--♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡--

Not that you actually say that. No, you attempt to actually uphold your side of the unspoken bargain by ignoring the man across the crowded room. 

You haven’t seen him in...what? Two years? Two and a half? All you can really remember is a door slamming in your face and a flustered staff member directing you toward the exit. 

You’d nearly made it to the exit before Jungkook burst out of the hallway, desperate and sprinting toward you as though you were his life’s work slipping through his fingertips. 

“I’m leaving,” you had muttered as Jungkook barreled into you that afternoon, panting and brushing his hair out of his face. 

“What?” He sounded incredulous. “No...no, you’re not. Listen, I’ll sort it out right now, and-”

“Jungkook.” The way you said his name had him closing his mouth in an instant. He was always such a good listener. “I’m...I’m leaving. I- I have to go.”

He let you leave, although the way he held onto your hands until you quite literally slipped through his fingertips left you with a shattered heart. 

You’d been together for only three weeks before it all came crashing down. Why did it hurt so much after so short a time? The fact that Jungkook - Jeon Jungkook - had come forward and confessed to you was the icing on the cake. As far as you knew, life was better and brighter than ever before. 

But you were young; you both were. Too young, Sejin had gently told you only a week into your secretive relationship with the singer. Jungkook was too young and on the verge of major success along with the rest of the members; a relationship was the last thing he needed. 

A scandal, he’d called it. Because that’s what it would look like. Jeon Jungkook fell for one of the staff members, how was it possible? The world would rip the two of you to shreds, and Sejin kindly reminded you of how quick Jungkook was to blame himself for any sort of mistake. 

For one week, you lived in bliss. 

For the following two, you lived a lie. You couldn’t bring yourself to tell Jungkook the truth. That you were leaving, that you’d submitted your two-week notice. It was for the best.

The feeling of someone staring has the hair on the back of your neck rising, and as you turn to glare at the perpetrator, you jump to see Jungkook right behind you. Drink in hand and mussing his hair with the other, he looks at you for a split second before looking down at his feet. 

“Hey.”

The word goes straight through you as you attempt to look nonchalant and lean against the counter.  

“Hey!” Ok, that was way too peppy. “I, uh...how are you?”

“Good, good.” Jungkook clears his throat almost comically before peeking back up at you. “How are you?”

“Great. Doing...great.”

Well, this sucks. 

Jungkook appears inclined to agree, but he treks on like a champ. “Yugyeom told me he invited you. Didn’t expect you to show up, though.” He gives a breathy chuckle, a wry smile appearing on his face for a moment before slipping away. 

Right. Yugyeom. This is his house-warming party, after all. You were admittedly a little surprised to receive the invitation, but you didn’t give it much thought considering that you lived fairly close. 

Now, though, you’re remembering how close he and Jungkook are. 

“Yeah, well, you know. I thought I might as well stop in. Wish him well. I can’t-” you cut yourself off, continuing on carefully. “I can’t stay.”

Those words have Jungkook’s eyes sharpening, and you know that he must recall the incident two years ago when you said something unnervingly similar before walking out of his life for what you thought would be forever. He nods, jaw clenched a bit and tongue pressing into his cheek. 

“That was nice of you to come, though.”

Awkward. This is all so awkward, you can’t hardly stand it anymore. You shouldn’t have come, but now you’ll be wiser in the future-

“I’m happy to see you, actually.”

“What?” The word comes out a bit forceful, but you’re shocked. Jungkook is happy? To see you?

Again, a flicker of a smile graces his features before settling down again. “I said I’m happy you’re here. I was beginning to wonder if I’d ever see you again.”

There it is; that familiar spark of mischief that’s so at odds with Jungkook’s typical shy nature. Indeed, he seems more confident than the Jungkook you left behind two years ago. 

Perhaps it the long hair that gives him the boost of confidence. That, or the array of tattoos he’s added in your absence. Maybe it’s the astonishing amount of fame and awards he now has under his belt. 

The Jungkook of two years ago? Yeah, he was on the cusp of greatness. If you’d asked him then, he probably would have thought that he couldn’t achieve much more. He was just happy to keep doing his job.

This Jungkook? 

He throws you off balance. Makes you question if what you’re seeing is real. He has some sort of X factor that you never noticed before. 

Most of all, he makes you wonder what might have been. 

It’s the what-if’s that has you saying, “I really should get going, Jungkook. It’s been great seeing you, though. Congrats on...everything, I guess.” You laugh a little too loudly and begin weaving your way through the crowd toward where you last saw Yugyeom. Your heart is beating out of your chest at this point, so when Jungkook grabs your wrist, you’re sure he can feel your pulse. 

“Wait!” 

If the entire room wasn’t trying to eavesdrop before, they certainly are now. Thankfully, Jungkook also notices this and drops your hand a second later. 

“Tell Yugyeom I say bye, too.”

“Jungkook-”

“I’ll meet you out front!” And before you can object, he’s off. Disappearing between the crowd and taking his coat with him. You’re left standing there like some sort of statue until someone taps your elbow. 

“Hoseok,” you breathe out, a little shocked to see him standing beside you with a kind smile. “Hey.”

“Hey. Yugyeom is at the back of the living room,” he points out the tall man, who’s immersed in a story told by a girl you’ve never seen before. 

“Oh, thanks.”

Hoseok smiles again, nodding. “Of course.” You turn to head over to the living room, but turn back as Hoseok gently calls your name. “It really is good to see you again.”

You mumble out, “you, too,” before heading over to Yugyeom in a daze. You’ve only been here for about twenty minutes, but it’s somehow been enough to turn everything on its head. 

Once Yugyeom spots you, his eyes widen as though he’s surprised to see you. You duck your head, trying to get in and out as quickly as possible. It’s obvious now that people are staring, and you can practically feel the rumors swarming you. 

“You made it!” Yugyeom shouts. You grin, waving him off. 

“Yeah, but I have to head out now.”

Yugyeom pouts, but understands. “Thanks for stopping in. Did you eat?”

“I grabbed a couple of snacks, don’t worry. That’s literally the only reason I’m here.”

“Ouch.”

After a moment you bid him goodbye, only to have him lean in closer and whisper, “Jungkook is with you, right?”

You blink, wanting to ask him what he knows. Instead you mumble, “I think he’s waiting outside...”

“Good.” He gives you a pat on the back that nearly sends you flying. “I’ll see you later!”

With that strange interaction in mind, you grab your coat and head out into the evening air, significantly more confused than when you first entered the house.

It’s dark out, however there’s just enough light from the porch that you can see Jungkook’s silhouette. He stands out in the middle of the yard with his back to you, staring up at the stars. The sound from inside muffles your footsteps, for which you’re grateful as you stand on the porch for a moment to assess the situation. 

“I don’t live that far away,” you call out, causing him to spin around to face you. 

He shrugs. “That’s fine. Should we get going?”

You hesitate. “Jungkook, I’m fine to walk alone. What if you get recognized or something?”

Another shrug, and a step in your direction. “I’ll feel much better if you let me walk you home.”

You sigh, and Jungkook laughs as he knows that there’s no way you’ll say no to that. Shoving your hands in your pockets, you begin down the sidewalk. Jungkook cuts across the yard to meet you at the bottom of the driveway, eyes trained on your every step. 

“Ready?” He asks quietly. You wish he would be loud, boisterous even. It would be so much better than this gentle kindness he’s showing you right now. 

“Ready.” 

The two of you set off down the street in silence, and thankfully the sounds of the night makes it a little less awkward. However, that all goes down the drain as you stumble over an uneven space in the sidewalk, and Jungkook reaches out to steady you, hands around your shoulders and slowly trailing down your arms until they just brush up against your fingers. 

You glance up at him to see him with a determined look on his face as he stares down at your hands. He doesn’t take them though.

“You alright?” He mutters, eyes flitting to your face. His long hair keeps getting in his eyes, and you can hardly see one side of his face because of it. 

“Why did you decide to grow your hair out?” You blurt out, because that’s the only thing that’s keeping you from reaching up and brushing it aside. Jungkook blinks, fiddling with his hair self-consciously.

“I...I wanted something different,” he explains, and frowns when he feels like that’s not enough. “It makes me look older, doesn’t it?”

“Do you want to look older?”

He scrunches up his nose playfully, nudging you with his elbow. “Answer my question, first.”

“Oh. Yeah, a little older, I guess.”

Jungkook nods, satisfied with your answer for now. He strides off, leaving you scrambling to catch up. 

“Hey!” You shout after him, heart quite literally skipping a beat when you hear his boyish chuckle drifting back to you. He picks up the pace, nearly jogging now. “What are you doing? Wait- wait for me!”

He doesn’t, but you manage to grasp the back of his coat and pull backwards, succeeding in hindering him. Jungkook laughs a little louder now, the sound contagious. 

“Yah!” You whine amidst your giggles. Is this even real? Are you actually here, laughing in the street with Jungkook as though nothing ever happened? “You never answered my question!”

“Oh, that’s right,” he says, although you can tell that he never forgot about it. “What was it again?”

You smack his chest, feigning annoyance. “You know-”

“Ah, right. Why I want to look older, right?”

“Yeah, something like that.”

Jungkook takes a step back, reaching out and grabbing your hands. You feel like a fish out of water, standing here trying your best not to gape at him. Is this really the same boy that could hardly look you in the eye when he confessed his feelings for you all that time ago?

It must be, because he’s suddenly looking more nervous than he did a few seconds ago. 

“I heard you went to Iceland.”

Ok, that’s not an answer. 

“...yes?”

Jungkook shakes his head, eyes flitting all across your face as though checking for differences from the last time he saw you. “You always talked about wanting to go. How...” he trails off, suddenly looking down and realizing he’s holding your hands in his. He drops them, and you try to look unaffected by the action. “How was it?”

“Iceland?”

“Yeah.”

“Nice. Really pretty.”

You can tell he’s filing your answer away in his head, and for a brief second you wonder if there’s a folder labeled with your name somewhere in his brain. You wonder what’s inside of it. 

“And Paris?”

“How did you know...?”

Jungkook doesn't smile now, instead looking at you innocently before shrugging. “Answer the question.”

Chewing furiously on the inside of your cheek, you push aside your countless questions and answer his. “I like the countryside better than the city, honestly.”

“Where else did you go?” He muses, looking up at the night sky rather than you. If you could see better, you would have been able to see the way cheeks were burning bright red. “Italy, did you go to Italy?”

“Yeah, and Germany.”

“That’s right. Did you take the train?”

“Jungkook...”

He continues on, still staring up at the sky. He sways on his feet, reaching up to mess with his hair. “You always said you wanted to take the train-”

“Jungkook, what’s going on?”

Now he finally looks down at you, looking a little surprised at his own actions. Almost looking like he forgot you were here. 

“How were you so good at it?”

You sigh, annoyed now at this game of questions. “Good at what?”

Jungkook tilts his head to one side, assessing you. “Lying.” He chuckles a little at the way you take a step back as though you could physically dodge the accusation. “See? You can’t even deny it. You lied.”

“What, for the last two weeks of our three week relationship? Guilty as charged, then.”

“Do you feel guilty, then?” Jungkook scoffs, taking a step toward you. You take a half-step back, still drawn in by his magnetic field. “I was- how could I be so stupid! I thought I was falling in love with you! And you- you left me!”

“Yes! I left!” You all but shout, barely clinging to your composure now. “I’ll be the bad guy, that’s fine! But don’t pretend like you’ve been some martyr these past two years. You’ve been fine without me.”

“I was going to quit! I was going to quit for you!” 

“You’re an idiot if you think I was ever - if anyone was ever going to let you do something so stupid as quit for a girl you liked for a few weeks! So fine, I’ll be the bad guy. I left you, that’s right! I sucked it up and did what I had to do! So what else do you want?!”

Jungkook laughs - laughs - in earnest now, stumbling back. “Oh, c’mon. You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“I’m not.” You cross your arms, glaring at him. “So ‘fess up, Jeon. What else could you possibly want? More storage space for your trophies? Oh, how about some vacation days? You know, since all I ever hear about it how hard-working you are-”

“You!” He shoves his hair back angrily, which promptly falls back in his face. “I’ve been waiting like an idiot for you to show up again! Go ahead and laugh, I know it’s stupid!” 

You aren’t laughing, though. No, you’re frozen in place as Jungkook continues to rant. 

“And you’re right. Three weeks, we were together for three weeks. How pathetic was I to fall for you that quickly? Do you have any idea what it did to me, when I found out that you’d been lying to my face that entire time?”

“I didn’t want to hurt you-”

“You did. You can’t change that.”

You sigh, rubbing your eyes. “I know that. But Sejin said we were too young, and I mean, he had a point. Jungkook,” you open your eyes to see that Jungkook has stumbled off the curb. You’re nearly his height now, and you look him straight in the eye as you continue. “We were so young. It killed me to leave, but you’re right. You were so sweet, so good, that you would never be the one to pull the plug. I had to do it. And now look! Look at you, you’ve accomplished so much-”

“No,” Jungkook takes another step back, and you follow, standing on the edge of the curb now. “No. You...I wanted to go everywhere with you.” His voice breaks, and he takes a deep breath to try and steady himself. “You did everything without me, and I watched from a distance. You wanna know what the worst part is?”

You don’t - can’t - answer. 

“I tried so hard to hate you. When you went to Iceland I nearly did, I think that’s the closest I ever got.” He chuckles, and you recognize the strangeness of it all. Are you really standing out here arguing with Jungkook about going on a trip without him? “I used to daydream about getting calls from you in Iceland, or that you would send me a picture of the view or something. Just something to let me know that you were thinking of me, too.”

“I went alone,” you numbly add. “I’ve never felt so alone in my entire life.”

Jungkook sighs, anger slipping off of him now as he gazes at you. “I would have gone with you. I would go anywhere with you.”

You pause, furrowing your brows at his wording. “...you would?”

Jungkook seems to notice what he said now, instantly beginning to chew on his lip. His gaze drops to the ground as he slowly nods. 

“Sejin told me everything,” he mumbles, fiddling with the cuffs of his coat. “About how he thought we were too young, everything.”

This boy is about to give you whiplash if he keeps changing the subject so quickly. “And? It didn’t change anything, did it?”

He shrugs. “I just wish you would’ve told me. We could’ve...we could’ve worked something out.”

And that’s what he wanted to tell you tonight. There’s no anger left in his words, just regret. 

You wait to see if he’ll say anything else, and when he’s quiet you begin to walk. You’re only about a block away from home, but it feels like an eternity away. Jungkook trails a couple of steps behind you, still on the road while you stick to the sidewalk. 

It’s eerily quiet in your head as you near your house, the sound of Jungkook’s footsteps apparently taking up all of your energy. When you’re a couple of houses down, Jungkook clears his throat.

You keep walking, listening to see what he’ll say. When you glance back at him, his eyes are still trained on the ground, and he’s kicking a pebble along with the utmost determination. 

It’s only when you’re heading up your driveway that Jungkook finally speaks. 

“I’m sorry.”

You pause, turning on your heel to face him. “Why are you apologizing?”

Jungkook keeps looking down at the ground, reminding you of your first shy encounter with him. “I didn’t...I didn’t want to yell at you. I just lost control when I realized that you were here and you seem so indifferent to everything and-”

“I seem indifferent?” You ask, genuinely surprised. “Oh. Nice.”

He snorts, looking up at you with a mock glare. “I’m sorry, though. That was a lot to take in.”

It was. Amidst all the arguing, you’d nearly forgotten what he was so mad about in the first place. However, it sounded like he was more angry at himself than he was with you. 

“Did you really mean it?”

“Mean what?”

“That you still want...” you can’t bring yourself to say it, but judging from the way Jungkook’s head shoots up and his wide eyes bore into your soul, he knows what you’re implying. 

He nods slowly, taking a couple of steps toward you but stopping just out of reach. You stare at him, not quite believing it. 

“But...I hurt you.”

“You did.”

“And you still...?”

“I do.”

You laugh, startled. “What? How? I mean, that’s flattering and everything, but don’t you think you’re maybe confused with what we had versus what actually happened between us?”

Jungkook tilts his head to the side, back to analyzing you and every word you speak. “Do you not want me?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“No, but then again, you didn’t say much of anything in the ‘I want Jungkook’ department.”

You snort, marveling at the little smirk that plays on Jungkook’s lips. His eyes remain open, unguarded. “I...yes. I do. Always have.”

He blinks, clearly surprised. The fact that he was prepared to be rejected does something to your heart. “Wait, really?”

“Jungkook, I didn’t leave because I wanted to.” I left because I had to.

For now, that appears to be enough incentive to get Jungkook to take the final few steps toward you, hands rising and then falling back at his sides as his eyes rove all over. He freezes at you allow one of your hands to rise, brushing aside the strands of hair that fell in his eyes. 

You jump a little when he grabs that hand, keeping it against his cheek as he stares down at you. When he speaks, he’s almost too quiet to hear. 

“Aren’t we old enough now?”

His question makes you stop breathing altogether, as you know what he’s implying. Does he really want you back? 

“But-” you sputter, “It’s been two years, Jungkook. We’ve both changed, we probably wouldn’t even make it-”

“From where I’m standing, I’m still a stupid amount of in love with you-” you gasp at his confession, eyes wide as you try to detect the lie. There is none. “And it looks like you still want me. We’re older now, I mean...look at me. You even said I look older, so Sejin should have nothing to complain about-”

“Don’t tell me that’s why you grew your hair out,” you groan, trying to hide your laughter. 

“Only partially,” he defends. “I mean, c’mon. Not everything revolves around you, you know.” You open your mouth to complain, but fall silent as Jungkook rotates your hand just enough to plant a kiss on the inside of your wrist. You gape at him, watching how his eyes flutter shut for a brief moment before finding your face again. 

“I just,” you shake your head once you find your ability to speak again. “I can’t believe this.”

Jungkook pauses, planting another kiss to your wrist before speaking. “I can’t lie. You should know that.”

You arch a brow at him, which encourages him to plead his case. 

“If I could lie, I would have told you that your absence meant nothing.” He steps forward half a step, chewing on his bottom lip before continuing. “If I could lie, I would have told you that I never think of you anymore. That your name doesn’t make me stop everything just to listen. If I could lie, I would tell you that I haven’t been imagining this moment ever since you walked out of my life two years ago.”

“This moment?”

In answer, Jungkook cups your face and leans forward, tilting your chin up and letting out a shaky breath. “Promise me something.”

His hair has fallen back into his face, but you don’t seem to care as he inches ever closer until his breath is fanning across your face. “Anything.”

You mean it. 

You’re forced to close your eyes now, he’s too close to focus on anything. Jungkook’s lips ghost over your own as he utters out his request. 

“Promise me that this won’t be our last kiss.”

Suddenly you’re reminded of your first kiss together. It had been in his studio, long after you thought everyone had gone home. Jimin hadn’t, though, which you found out when he barged in and Jungkook had practically thrown you across the room. You failed to stifle a laugh as he tried to explain himself to a skeptical Jimin. 

He was adorable, and anxious, and absolutely in love. 

And as he leans in now, you realize that nothing has changed. He’s still Jungkook. 

He’s still yours.

“I promise.”

--

m.list || buy me an orange juice?

thanks for reading! if you enjoyed, please consider reblogging so other people can read it! 💖

taglist: @baepsaetay​​ @dreamcatcherjiah​​ @kookie-vuitton​​ @thecaffeinatedscribbles @moon-write​​ @fangirl125reader​​ @heishichoulevi @knjkitten​​ @sacha-cff​​ @vik7797  @eusticenatalie​ @hesmyphenominiall​​ @miriamxsworld​​ @kayahay​​ @secretlycrazyhummingbird​​ @marianeamine​​​ @hqtetsurou​​ @protontippens​​ @beginwithamin​​ @limiworld​​  @jeonyoongi-jimin @buttvi​​ @yoontaethings​​ @sunshinejunghoseokie​​ @delacyrose224​​ @jiminiesmagicshop​​ @hitsussi @fanfictonreader05 @hyungieyoongi​​ @lolalee24

You’re finally at the front of the line, at the door frame behind a velvet rope. You can see each member standing in a line, a fan in front of them, shaking hands and girls whispering their affections briefly.

The boys are glowing, you’ve never been as close to them as you are now, and you’re about to be even closer, you’re about to shake their hand too. You’ve been rehearsing this moment in your head ever since you had confirmation the tickets were yours.

‘You can do this, y/n. This is your moment, you got this!’ You try to hype yourself up as you fix your hair and try to calm your nerves.

You realize your mouth hurts from smiling so wide, you can barely contain yourself. You try to take in each of them from your distance, all their tiny quirks and actions, as you wait for your turn. Now the staff is unlocking the rope for you and ushering you to the first member.

You think you might throw up with all the butterflies in your stomach and hope to God you don’t.

“Hello Army,” Jungkook says in English shyly, holding out his hand and giving you a bright smile. You meet his brown doe eyes and freeze ‘Don’t pass out, y/n.’ You extend your hand and-

The second your fingers wrap around his you feel like you’ve been pulled underwater. Everything around you goes dark and clouded except for the man in front of you.

And then you’re in a forest, you’re still holding his hand, but Jungkook’s running, pulling you along. He’s so fast, the muscles in your legs are burning and your feet ache. You feel each branch and twig jab your soles painfully, your slippers doing nothing to protect you from the rugged terrain. All you can see is a flurry of leaves and twigs as you try your best to dodge them in the moonlit forest. You hear the whines of dogs behind you and yells of angry men.

Jungkook’s grip on you is causing you to lose feeling in your fingers, but he doesn’t lessen his hold, and pulls you along even impossibly faster. You’ve never been more scared in your life, but the man in front of you doesn’t feel scary. Actually, Jungkook feels like safety, like protection. He feels like home. You do everything you can to keep yourself from tripping and falling and losing Jungkook forever. Now you can feel the fear of losing him wash over your entire being, like an ice cold shower. You both run and run and run and-

And you feel the sun’s warmth on your closed eyelids, Jungkook’s fluffy hair is tickling your cheeks. When you open your eyes, Jungkook is giving you a lazy smile. You can feel the rough fabric of a blanket beneath you both and the straw of the farmhouse beneath that. Jungkook is playing with your fingers as you lie across from each other, rolling each finger pad between his, “Hey beautiful.”

It’s so warm and quiet and still, you can’t help but smile back as he moves his face closer nudging your nose with his, bringing up his other hand to play with your hair. You feel his warm breath against your skin, breathing him in you close the gap between his lips and yours and everything is so warm.

The instruments in the ballroom play a fast melody, the crowd around you dancing in pairs, you are being spun around by your fiance but your attention is on someone else.

You see him out of the corner of your eye and you wish he’d come to you, and as if he heard your inner thoughts, he makes a beeline to you on the dance floor.

“You don’t mind if I cut in?” He shines a bright smile, addressing your dance partner, paying special attention to not give you too much recognition, and your body becomes jittery with excitement.

Your fiance looks irritated but his voice is calm, “of course,” and places your hand in Jungkook’s.

Jungkook pulls you along the dance floor, and your heart soars. His hand squeezes yours, thumb rubbing circles affectionately.

“You look beautiful this evening, as always.” he gazes down at you, stopping only briefly at your lips, an action you catch and your breath hitches.

“And you look as dashing as ever.” You say hushed enough for only him to hear, not brave enough to look him in the eyes.

He twirls you and dips you, and when you stand again he pulls you a bit closer to the length of his body. You laugh together and you feel like you are the only two people on the dance floor. He pulls your body all the more closer, he pulls you-

He pulls you through the forest. You’re drenched in a cold sweat, the howls of the hunting dogs are so loud they feel like they are right behind you, but you don’t dare look back, instead you look down at Jungkook’s bruising grip.

---

He shudders and you feel like you’ve been shocked by electricity. The second you touch his hand you pull back fast and hard. The room’s attention is on both of you. Your breathing is heavy, the sound of leaves crunching plays in your memory. His eyes, his smile, his body swaying to the sweet melody of the string quartet against yours, it all replays again and again within your mind. Before you can make sense of it, he is reaching out to you again, gripping your hand and yanking you to him. You look up and Jungkook looks how you feel, frantic and anxious.

You’re back on the dance floor, laughing and twirling, happiness you’ve never felt before.

The two of you walk hand-in-hand on a gray beach during twilight, the mist and fog concealing you and Jungkook from the world. His words are gentle but pleading as he begs you to go away with him. You stay silent as you listen to the waves crash onto the rocks of the shoreline, you feel the waves of despair ripple in your heart, and you question which storm is more tumultuous, the air brewing around you or the storm of emotions thundering within your chest.

You know if you say yes, you’ll lose everything, but then, you’ll have him.

And you already know your answer, that you don’t love your fiance, someone your parents arranged for you to continue to live a cushioned, safe, and frankly boring existence. No, you love the man in front of you, with all the strength of a roaring current on a windy day.

His body is above yours, trapping you beneath his strong frame, he pulls away from your lips just long enough to pull his shirt over his head, and your lips connect together again. His hands trail down your body and down to grip at your thighs, pushing them more open for him. The straws of hay scratch against your back. You caress his cheek while you both catch your breath, and he leans into your touch. You love him. In that moment, you knew you’d never stop loving him, in this lifetime and forever after.

You cry out, your sobs wretched from deep within you, resounding your despair. Your fingers twist around the fabric of Jungkook’s shirt and you bury your head into his chest trying to breath in his scent, but instead you smell dirt and woods and the metal sting of blood. A desperate scream leaves your lips while Jungkook lays there broken, trying to call your name but can only gasp for breath, gurgling on the accumulating blood in the back of his throat as he chokes on it, his vision blurs and he can only hear your cries.

You want nothing more than to disappear from this place with him in your arms. The dogs are barking all around you, being shushed by the men circling your tired battered bodies.

“Take her back to the house,” commands the familiar voice of your fiance as you sob into Jungkook's chest. He looks down at you both, and then looks away disgusted, “You know what to do with the body.”

A large hand grabs your elbow and yanks you from Jungkook. You scream, both your hands envelope his left and you gather everything left in you to hold on.

But it’s not enough. You wail no at the top of your lungs, but he’s already so far away from you.

---

Jungkook is visibly shaking now under the lights of the meeting room as you instantly yank your hand back again. The memory of your faint screams still reverberating in his ears. Your eyes are wide and staring at no particular spot on the ground trying to control your emotions.

You have a splitting headache, as you breath in you swear you can still smell dirt and rust around you.

It had felt so real, everything, but you know it’s not. You know you’re not covered in blood and dirt and grime but you still feel it surrounding you. You can hear the hushed whispers of other fans wondering why you two are acting so weirdly. Next to Jungkook, Jimin shakes the younger man's shoulder looking concerned. Among the musical instruments still playing in your head you hear a staff member tell you to move along, but you feel frozen in place. As your surroundings become clearer, you try to shake it off, whatever that was. A weird day dream? You take in a shaky breath and lift your heavy feet.

Jimin raises his eyebrow at you and looks briefly between you and Jungkook, who just stares at you like he’s seen a ghost, face pale and eyes glassy. Trying to salve the situation, Jimin turns on the charm, giving you a crescent eyed smile while reaching out his hand. Your shaky hand grabs his.

Next

"I don't care. I love Sooyoung and I will marry her." Jungkook tongued the inside of his cheek, sending a nasty glare to his mother. "Even if you disinherit me."

Even if you disinherit me. Such a bold thing to say for someone who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.

Jungkook was raised in a world where he could have anything he wanted with just a snap of his fingers.

He lived off his parents' money, not knowing real responsibility. All this time he was inside a bubble made out of diamond.

But this bubble popped when he turned his back on his family to be with Kang Sooyoung.

"I can't believe we really did it!" Sooyoung squealed in the passenger seat, the adrenaline hadn't worn off yet. It had been less than an hour since she got married.

The wedding wasn't grand but only because it was rushed. No one attended the ceremony, not even their families and friends.

Sooyoung didn't mind. What's important was their honeymoon. Jungkook promised to bring her to Maldives. They're on their way to the airport now actually.

"We did, huh. Everything's worth it, Sooyoung-ah." Jungkook glanced at his wife, flashing her his toothy grin. There were sparks in his eyes. "Leaving my family is worth it."

The spark was gone the moment Sooyoung opened her mouth.

"Jungkook," the tone of her voice was rough. Her heart was thumping, but this time it wasn't because of euphoria.

Sooyoung was agitated. She could only hope she was wrong for taking his statement at face value. She had to ask him what he meant, right?

"You—" she swallowed thickly, unsure how to phrase her thoughts. "Please tell me your family agreed to us getting married..."

Jungkook nipped at his upper lip, his grip on the steering wheel tightening.

"Jungkook." She said his name in a demanding way. She needed an answer. Now.

"They didn't." He murmured, refusing to look at his wife. "They told me they'd disown me if I married you."

Sooyoung sucked in a breath. Her voice was shaky when she asked him why his family didn't like her.

Jungkook didn't want to respond to that. He knew the answer would break her heart. The Jeons didn't like Sooyoung because she was a gold digging bitch—at least this was what Jungkook's older sister said.

Jeon Jang-mi couldn't think of any other reason why twenty five year-old Sooyoung would want to marry Jungkook. The latter was barely an adult. He didn't understand how the real world worked. She doubted he could fulfill the desires of an older woman. Jungkook didn't think so though. He snarled at his sister, saying that she didn't know shit.

Sooyoung married him because of love, not money. However, this was where Jungkook was wrong.

Jang-mi was right all along. Sooyoung turned out to be a gold digger.

"Y-You have to go back!" She demanded in distress. "Go back to your family and ask for their forgiveness.You can't live your life without their support, Jungkook!"

At first he thought she was being sweet.

"That's sweet," so he told her that. "But I won't. I hate them. They don't want me to be happy—"

"This isn't about you being happy, you brat! This is about us surviving!" She hissed at him, hitting his arm. "You are a child, Jungkook! This is stupid! You are stupid! How do you think you'll live without your family's money, huh!?"

"I'll find a job!" Sooyoung was upset and so was he. Jungkook never raised his voice at her before, but she was pissing him off. Calling him stupid and making him feel like a boy. He was a man now. He got married!

"Find a job?" She scoffed. "Do you hear yourself, huh!? You haven't even been to college! You are a fucking high school graduate, Jungkook! Who would want to hire you?" Now she cackled, her eyes brimmed with tears, not with sadness but with frustration.

Jungkook was stubborn.

"I told you already! I will find a job!" He repeated. "My friend’s friend opened a restaurant and they're looking for a delivery boy—"

"A delivery boy!" She gaped at him. "Jungkook, I swear to God if you applied for that job I'm going to divorce you!"

Jungkook abruptly stopped the car upon hearing that. "What did you just say?" His eyes darted quickly to her, his nostrils flaring.

"You're going to what?" His ears were red, brows pinched together. He was so confused and hurt and infuriated he didn't know what to do.

"I will divorce you!"

It was like he had been punched in the gut.

"I only married you for money, Jeon. If you can't provide for me, then what's the point of staying in this relationship? I don't love you."

She glared daggers at him.

"I will never love you."

It's funny that with four words, the world he took years to build would collapse just like that.

"Y-You don't mean that." Jungkook felt like life was sucked out of him.

He felt weak. Defeated.

Jang-mi was right. Sooyoung was a gold digger.

"So either apologize to your parents and beg them not to cut you out of the will or keep your pride and lose me."

She was a bitch too.

"No." If she was bitch, then he was a brat.

"I won't lose you."

Jungkook started to drive once again.

Sooyoung let out a breath of relief; however, the complacency she thought she had had been shattered when Jungkook drove straight ahead.

"Uh, Jungkook," she creased her forehead. "This is not the way to your parents' estate. You need to turn around."

"No." He stepped on the gas harder.

She panicked.

"What do you mean no?" Her eyes were wide, her mind was running wild. "You said you didn't want to lose me!"

"I did say that," harder. He stepped on the gas harder. "But I didn't say I'll apologize to my parents."

"Jungkook!" Sooyoung shrieked because her husband fooled her and also because he was going too fast.

100 km/h.

"We're off on our own, Sooyoung. We're going home. I rented an apartment for us."

110 km/h.

"No! Stop the car, Jungkook! Let me go! I don't want to be with you!" She unfastened her seat belt.

Jungkook was alarmed, thinking that she would get away.

He stepped on the gas with more force.

120 km/h.

"Bastard!" Sooyoung cried, hitting his arms, thighs, and chest. "Stop the car! I want to get out!"

Sooyoung's wish came true.

She got out of the car.

Not through the door though.

But through the window.

Jungkook was going too fast that their car crashed into something big. Jungkook couldn't really remember what it was.

His mind was hazy. Blood dripped down his head.

But he remembered wanting to get out of the car.

He knew he had to go to Sooyoung. He had to check on her. She was lying on the ground, surrounded by her own blood and shattered windshield glass.

But he couldn't. His head hurt, his body hurt, his heart hurt and all he wanted to do was sleep.

So he slept.

A miracle.

The doctors told the Jeon family that ‘miracle’ was the only explanation why Jungkook was alive.

In almost all cases, people who got into a car accident ended up dying, especially if they were reckless on the street.

Jungkook was reckless. He should have been dead...but he wasn't.

He was alive, suffering from injuries—well, severe injuries.

Jungkook was unconscious for two whole days. He also didn't respond to Dr. Kim Namjoon’s commands, not even on any stimuli, including painful ones.

Dr. Kim had to declare that Jungkook was in a coma.

Coma normally lasted for no more than two to three weeks. However Jungkook's case was different. He stayed unconscious for six weeks before evolving to the next level of consciousness which was vegetative state.

As a caregiver for three years now, you were aware that people who entered the vegetative state would be awake, but unaware.

This was why you weren't startled when Jungkook suddenly opened his eyes. You were surprised, however, when he grabbed your hand forcefully, stopping you from dabbing a damp washcloth to his face.

"S-Sooyoung!" Jungkook panted, heart recoiling.

You flinched, pupils dilating because of your sudden skin contact with patient Jeon. His grip on your hand was so tight you felt like he was cutting your blood flow. Water from the damp washcloth also cascaded down your arms as he squeezed your hand harder.

You winced, pressing the buzzer to indicate that you needed help. Patient Jeon Jungkook was in a coma for six weeks. He was supposed to be weak and unable to move.

How could he grip your hand like this?

"Sooyoung!" Patient Jeon screamed again, voice low and hoarse. You saw tears rolled down his cheeks. He looked like he was in a lot of pain.

"Sooyoung, d-don't leave me! Please!"

Jungkook was starting to get aggressive. His grip on you grew tighter but you didn't push him away. You couldn't do that to a patient who was breaking apart. You were his only anchor, you couldn't let him drown in sorrow.

"What happened—oh, my! Jungkook!" Jinjoo, Jungkook's other older sister, covered her mouth, too shocked to see that her brother was going feral.

The doctors and Jungkook's mother were surprised as well. No one thought that they'd be seeing someone who was in a coma for weeks acting like he was suddenly possessed—too strong and hard to control.

"Sooyoung! I need to see Sooyoung!" He sounded so broken that your heart churned. You wanted to turn away and leave the medical workers to tend to him; but you couldn't. You were stuck here, wallowing with the pain of Jungkook's cold hand holding and scratching you.

"I need to see Sooyoung!" He repeated, sobbing and choking. "Why can't I see Sooyoung? Why can't I see anything?"

"Dr. Kim! Why is he like this?" Jungkook's mother weeped. The pain of seeing her son like this killed her, especially because the doctor didn't seem like he had an explanation why the patient was acting like this.

Jungkook was supposed to be in vegetative state while Dr. Kim was expected to perform a series of formal tests, confirming that patient Jeon's condition was worsening toward brain death.

Instead of that, here they were, trying to calm an aggressive patient. Dr. Kim instructed the nurses to sedate Jungkook. The task was proven to be difficult as Jungkook struggled to get away, like there's somewhere else he needed to be.

You realized immediately where he wanted to go.

"Sshh, Jungkook..." You caressed his hand that's still holding you. "It's me Sooyoung. I'm here...I'm not going to leave you...sshh..."

"Sooyoung?" Instantly, Jungkook calmed down, allowing the nurses to move quickly as they sedated him.

Jungkook winced in pain. His grip on your hand was loosening.

"Sooyoung...I'm sorry, don't leave me..." He trailed off, eyes fluttering shut. "I'll be good..." This was the last thing he said before losing consciousness.

The day of the accident, Sooyoung's wish came true: she wanted to get away from him.

She did.

When Jungkook woke up after being in a coma for weeks, he made a wish too: he hoped Sooyoung would be around when he woke up again.

His wish didn't come true.

Kang Sooyoung was dead. She died seconds after their car crashed.

Mrs. Jeon and her two daughters were worried about you—this was the only rational reason you could think of as to why they invited you to their estate.

"Here..." Mrs. Jeon said warmly as she placed a cup of tea in front of you.

"Thanks," you grinned, eyes roaming around the place.

The Jeon estate was probably the biggest house you had ever been to. Their breakfast nook was thrice bigger than your apartment. Everything you saw sparkled with gold and diamonds.

They're not just rich. They're rich rich.

You glanced back at Mrs. Jeon, about to tell her that they had a lovely home; however, you weren't able to speak when you saw the scowl on her face.

She was staring at your hand, the same hand her son scratched when he woke up aggressive.

"Ah," you hid your hand immediately, not wanting her to worry. "It's nothing." You lied. Your hand hurt. There were scratches on the back of your hand and palm.

Jungkook's fingernails were sharp and long. He got you good.

"It's not nothing," Jang-mi blurted out beside you. She gritted her teeth after calling your name, the tone of her voice made you feel like you had offended her.

"You got hurt because of my brother." Now she sounded dejected.

"It's my job to help patients, Ms. Jang-mi." You hoped the smile you gave her was somehow reassuring. You didn't want her to worry because you're honestly okay. "I've been through worse. Some patients are really aggressive, although I have to say I wasn't expecting Patient Jeon to act like that."

Shivers ran down your spine upon remembering what happened three days ago. You still had no idea where Jungkook got that energy to fight you and the medical workers.

Could it be, just like what they said, a miracle? You hadn't seen patient Jeon since he was first sedated. The Jeons asked you to take a break for a short while since they understood that you're probably shaken up because of what the youngest Jeon had done to you.

Admittedly, you thought that the short vacation was unnecessary. You were a caregiver, your job was to take care of your patients, especially when they're behaving that way. But the Jeons were feeling guilty, forcing you to unwind for a week. They said you didn't have to worry about salary deductions. They got it covered.

"Our Jungkookie is very lucky to be given a second chance..." Mrs. Jeon's throat closed up, she could feel tears forming in her eyes.

Your heart stirred as you looked at her. You weren't a mother, but you felt like you understood what she's going through right now. Nothing's more painful than watching your son on his deathbed and not knowing what to do.

Mrs. Jeon felt helpless.

"It's not just luck. I'm sure he deserves to live. Your son is a good person..." This was something similar to what you always said to the family of your patients albeit not knowing a single thing about them.

It wouldn't hurt to be supportive, right? How bad was it to lift someone up when you obviously had the means to do so?

"How's he doing, by the way?" You asked, sipping your tea and hoping they'd finally tell you why you were here.

Were they worried about you getting hurt? Or was there something else? You were an independent caregiver, Mina, your friend, recommended you to the Jeons weeks ago. You instantly accepted the job to look after Jungkook because if you were being honest, this was probably the easiest caregiving job you had ever taken.

Patient Jeon had seven caregivers because there were seven days a week. You were tasked to look after him every Monday for twenty four hours. Your job included wiping his face, making sure he's receiving proper treatment from the hospital, and singing. You liked singing lullabies to him. Mrs. Jeon told you that her son was musically inclined so you thought singing might help him recover.

"He's..." Mrs. Jeon wanted to answer your question, unfortunately she trailed off. She felt like there's a lump in her throat.

When you looked at Mrs. Jeon's daughters, you noticed their somber expression too, causing you to panic.

Did something bad happen to Jungkook?

Jinjoo confirmed it.

"Our Jungkookie...his eyes..." She was having a hard time completing her statement. She felt like there were heavy stones in her chest, "they're damaged. He can't see."

"Oh." Your shoulders dropped, sympathy swimming in your eyes. You had looked after blind people before. Your heart broke every time they shared their stories to you—how they wished they could see the blue sky, the leaves from falling down, and the smile of their loved ones.

As if being reminded by your former patients' stories wasn't painful enough, the Jeons started to tell you Jungkook's current condition in detail, breaking your heart even more.

They said he was blind, an obvious consequence of driving recklessly. Jungkook needed to go through surgery in order to see again.

"I'm sorry to hear that," you bit your lower lip, feeling bad. "How's Jungkook holding up?"

The pain in your chest didn't go away, especially when the Jeons revealed to you that Jungkook wasn't doing very well. He was frustrated with the situation, he was so angry. He kept crying and lashing out on everyone.

All he wanted was to see again. He wanted—no, he needed his vision back so he could see Sooyoung again.

"Kang Sooyoung?" Your brow shot up. "She's Jungkook's late wife, right?"

Mrs. Jeon and her daughters kept quiet. They looked uncomfortable when you said the words late wife. You understood the situation at once.

"You...haven't told him..." You said slowly.

Mrs. Jeon shook her head, face pale and lips trembling, like she was caught doing something wrong.

You didn't know what happened between Jungkook and his wife, but you overheard the other caregivers gossiping that Patient Jeon and Sooyoung had a terrible fight, leading to the accident.

The cops went to the hospital a few weeks back. They weren't able to get any information though. Jungkook was in a coma and Sooyoung was dead. The security cameras were the only evidence the authorities could refer to. From what you had heard, it looked like Jungkook was over-speeding, causing his car to crash into a barrier.

The lawyers of the Jeons took care of it. In short, Jungkook wouldn't be held accountable, all he needed to do was to get better.

Except that he couldn't get better without Sooyoung by his side.

"We haven't had the chance to tell him the truth..." Jinjoo admitted, explaining that Jungkook showed aggression whenever they tried to insinuate that something happened to Sooyoung.

He would go feral and then the medical workers would be forced to sedate him again.

"That's rough. Please tell me if there's something I can do to help." You truly wanted to help, but this was also your way of subtly asking them if you could go back to work again.

You hated being stuck at home doing nothing, and for some reason, you also couldn't stop worrying about Jungkook.

The way he cried Sooyoung's name, the way his body trembled, and the way he gripped your hand...all of these were making your heart churn. It was like you could feel exactly what he was feeling.

"Actually..." Mrs. Jeon and her daughters looked at one another, it was as if they're silently agreeing into something. "There is."

Your ears perked up at that. Squaring your shoulders, you told them you're willing to do anything—this was your first mistake.

Looking back, you realized that your first mistake was when your life truly began.

Your second mistake? Agreeing to what the Jeons wanted you to do.

Third mistake? Leaving when he needed you the most.

Absurd.

"Please. You only need to pretend like you're his wife until the day of his surgery..."

You thought the Jeons were being ridiculous when they asked you this.

Truthfully, you were too stunned to speak.

"I—" You tried. You really did. However, you just ended up pressing your lips together.

In your twenty three years of existence, this was the first time you heard something so absurd. No matter how many times they reiterated their idea, you still thought the same thing: they're insane.

Demented.

Cruel.

The Jeons were cruel.

"We'll pay you. A blank check, if you'll just let us."

Your breathing hitched. A blank check! Your head was already spinning just by thinking about it.

It was bad and you knew it, yet you still allowed yourself to imagine having the money to pay rent in a livable apartment, to finally experience hot water gracing your skin, and to eat real food and not just leftovers of your patients.

Maybe with the Jeons' money, you could finally fulfill your job of being a bar owner, providing booze and a place where people could have fun and forget.

"But—" You were supposed to be against this. You were supposed to tell them that this plan would come back and bite them.

Hard.

"Why me?" But your question made it seem like you were agreeing, that they only needed to butter you up first before you said yes.

"Because you sound like that bitc—Sooyoung." Jinjoo corrected herself before she said something that might turn you off.

Who even called a dead person a bitch?

You weren't convinced by Jinjoo's explanation though. This was when Jang-mi decided to interject the conversation.

"Look, I understand that we're asking too much. It's not part of your job but you said you care for your patients, right?"

You had a bad feeling about this. It's dangerous how your own belief could be used against you.

"Jungkook is your patient and he needs to heal." Jang-mi looked desperate. You could feel it. She wanted to hold your hand and squeeze it tight until it hurt and you didn't have a choice but to just...give in.

"We know our brother well. Jungkook wouldn't want to push through the surgery if he finds out that his wife is dead. H-He's...." She let out a shaky breath, "going to question the point of seeing...and living if he can't be with Sooyoung."

"I don't know how to help him. Y-You said I sound like her..." You felt goosebumps attacking your skin. "But I don't know how to be her."

You didn't know what Sooyoung was like. You didn't know what Jungkook expected her to be. Hell, you didn't even know if you really sounded like her.

You saw her pictures though. She didn't look like you but you had the same weight, the same height.

It could work said by the tiny voice inside your head. You wanted nothing but to smack yourself for thinking this way.

For heaven's sake. This was illegal.

You could go to jail.

You were going to be an identity thief if you ever agreed to this preposterous plan.

Say yes, say yes, say yes, say yes, say yes, say yes. But the voice inside your head would not shut up.

Say yes.

There were also so many points to raise. Say yes.

A lot of things to argue. Say yes,

and a lot of things that didn't make sense. Say yes.

But in that moment, you felt like you were compelled: yes yes yes yes.

Maybe it was the somber atmosphere. Yes.

Maybe it was the desperation in their eyes, the desperation that was squeezing your heart tight. Yes.

Or maybe it was Jungkook and the way he held you. Yes.

Did it matter? No.

You guessed it did not. Yes.

All you knew was that someone was pulling you, and like a magnet, you clashed—thinking that it was the normal thing to do. Yes.

You finally gave in, saying yes. And that, my friend, was your second mistake.

You take it back—wait. This didn't sound right.

You wanted to take it back. Right. This sounded better.

"I said I don't want to fucking eat!"

You know what didn't sound better? Jungkook. He wasn't even good, nothing like the person you thought deserved a chance to live.

Jungkook was terrifying. His family was right. He lashed out on everyone.

You saw it with your two eyes today.

You saw how he swatted the tray of food in front of him, causing it to drop down the floor.

You winced. That's one meal for you. One meal you wanted to have but couldn't.

"Jungkook-ah..." Mrs. Jeon attempted to stroke her son's face, but just like what he did to his food, he also swatted his mother's hand away.

"Don't you fucking touch me! I don't need your sorry ass! I want my wife! Give me Sooyoung..." He was a beast who turned into a prey whenever he mentioned his wife's name.

Sooyoung. That was you now.

You agreed to the plan of the Jeons this morning, but you told them you had to meet Jungkook first. You had the right to know who you're dealing with before really diving in.

Jungkook was in the VIP room of the hospital. He still had many people looking after him. The Jeons actually hired more caregivers. They were looking for someone who could tame Jungkook.

No one could, so they went to you.

It was Jinjoo's idea to let you pretend like you were Sooyoung. Jungkook's older sister thought this was the easier and most effective way to calm her sibling.

She was right.

"I'm here, Jungkook." You murmured, voice so low you doubted he heard you.

He did.

He heard you. The change in his expression and behavior were instant.

"Sooyoung?" Jungkook sounded like a kicked puppy, lips protruding into a sulky pout.

"I-Is that you, Sooyoung-ah?" His voice cracked too.

You glanced at Mrs. Jeon as if you're asking for her permission to answer her son. Jungkook's face was angled towards your direction. Obviously, he couldn't see you, but it didn't mean it made you feel less nervous.

You felt like he was staring into your soul.

"Y-Yeah." Like him, you stammered too. It was a good thing that you were standing in the far corner of the room. Your voice might waver more if you went closer to him.

"Sorry I can't take care of you right now. I'm recovering too...you know, from...injuries." The Jeons didnt set limitations.

They said you only needed to pretend like you were Sooyoung. You could do that, but you had to draw a line. You didn't want to touch Jungkook intimately. No. That was too much.

The only way you could think of in order to escape being intimate towards him was by pretending like you were physically unable to do so.

"It's okay," he said softly as he smiled at you.

Your heart fluttered upon seeing his toothy grin. Jungkook didn't look like he could harm a fly whenever he was smiling.

You liked him when he was like this: soft and not throwing things.

"I'll take anything as long as you're here." The Jeons felt like they could finally breathe after Jungkook said this.

You sucked in a deep breath before saying: "then eat, Jungkook. You'll need your energy back so we can go home."

Your husband grinned, nodding his head like a child waiting for a reward. For the first time since he woke up, Jungkook finally ate well.

The sense of security Jungkook promised was only applicable when you were around.

Days after you told him that you were his wife, Jungkook was back at his destructive habits. He was lashing out on everyone and acting like a brat again.

"If you take another step towards me I'll make sure to fucking erase your face."

Fucking erase your face.

Fucking end your family line.

Fucking kill you.

These were some of his usual threats to his caregivers who were only trying to tend to him. Jungkook was back home but nothing much had changed. His routine was similar to how his day went when he was still staying at the hospital: he was stuck inside his room, he barely ate, and he snarled at those who were trying to converse with him.

Jungkook’s diamond bubble popped, but he blew another one and it was bigger and harder to pop than the previous one. His new bubble was made out of frustration and desolation.

Today, he threatened to erase the face of Dahyun, his new Monday caregiver, for trying to convince him to step outside of his room.

Dahyun simply wanted the best for Jungkook, saying that he needed to at least let sunlights grace his body.

Jungkook refused.

"What's happening here?" You barged inside Jungkook's room when you heard his scream.

Dahyung looked relieved to see you. She was aware of the power you had over Jungkook.

"Sooyoung." Dahyung called through gritted teeth. She and the other caregivers knew that you were pretending to be someone you were not.

Oh the things you all did just for this brat. Dahyun was certain no one would want to be with Jungkook if his family wasn't wealthy. Who would even want to deal with him? He acted like a child and it was getting annoying.

"Jungkook doesn't want to go out." The caregiver let out an exhausted breath, explaining that the patient needed to go out because his face was already so pale and that he needed a serotonin boost.

"I'll handle him." You offered her a tight smile before mouthing an apology.

Dahyun's annoyed face softened because of that. She nodded her head and patted your shoulder before heading out of the room, leaving you all alone with your fake husband.

"Jungkook..." You called as you went near him.

"Where have you been?" He folded his arms, brows knitting. He was also sporting this small pout. If you didn't know any better, you'd chuckle at how adorable he was.

You knew this was just a facade though. Jungkook wasn't a cute guy. He was a boy who hurt people when he didn't get what he desired.

"Out." You replied as you made your way behind his wheelchair. You gripped on the push handle while Jungkook looked back at you.

"Out where?" His lips protrude more.

Yeah. Out where? Said by the little voice inside your head, as if it was mocking you for running away from your responsibilities.

But I didn't leave. You scolded the voice. You just went to the garden here at Jeon estate to relax for a moment.

You owed it to yourself to at least breathe. You couldn't let Jungkook suffocate you.

It was tiring.

Living at the Jeon estate with Jungkook and his family was wearing you out. Sure, you weren't his caregiver anymore but it didn't mean you had escaped your duties.

Pretending to be Jungkook's wife was harder than being his caregiver. He was so demanding. He always wanted to be with you to the point that you already forgot the concept of alone time.

The only time he let you go was when you had to go to the bathroom. Other than that, he was always in the same room as you.

He never touched you though.

He tried to reach for you but you always moved away. You saw hurt crossed his face every time you did that. Admittedly, it made you feel guilty, but you told yourself you were doing him a favor.

Attachment was a dangerous thing. It was already bad that you two slept in the same room. Not in the same bed though.

Your excuse was that you were injured so you needed a big space where no one could accidentally kick you while you were sleeping. This was for the better. He couldn't get used to your touch because this setup was temporary. You'd disappear in his life after a few months.

Weeks from now, you wouldn't be by his side even when he was having a nightmare. You wouldn't be able to sing him a lullaby to help him calm down.

His life would change as soon as he undergoes surgery.

"Garden." You pushed his wheelchair. Luckily, Jungkook didn't threaten to erase your face. "It's nice to be out there, Kookie..."

The nickname rolled off your tongue before you could stop yourself. Jungkook tensed because of it.

He liked that nickname but Sooyoung never called him that. She said it sounded childish.

"L-Let's go out, okay?" You pushed his wheelchair, hoping that it would push the awkwardness away too.

You ought to learn how to act like Sooyoung. You and Jungkook's family had to be careful, otherwise all of these sacrifices would be for nothing.

Fortunately, Jungkook didn't comment on that. He let silence embrace you both as you pushed his wheelchair, only stopping when you reached the garden.

Jungkook clamped his eyes shut and then he inhaled deeply.

You remained standing behind his wheelchair while he relished on the warmth of the sun. The soft chirp of the birds as well as the sound of the wind blowing calmed his nerves.

It felt good to be out.

"Feels nice," and he finally admitted it, albeit sheepishly.

A smile bloomed on your face.

"Told you."

He didn't respond, letting the now comfortable silence engulf you once again.

After a short while, however, you broke the silence.

"You owe Dahyun an apology."

Instead of being defensive, he surprised you by releasing a breath as he muttered "I know," under his breath.

It gave you more courage to call him out for behaving so poorly.

"You can't treat people like that, Jungkook. I understand that you're frustrated with the situation, but you have to know that you're not the only one with feelings here." You swallowed thickly as you looked up at the sky. "Everyone gets hurt too..."

Jungkook felt like there was a lump in his throat. You were right and "you changed," too. He felt like you were not the Sooyoung he knew. Your voice sounded the same but your perspective changed.

Did the accident also change your life? Just like how it changed him?

"W-What do you mean?" You were back at it again. Stammering...Worrying that he would see right through your lies.

"You used to tell me it didn't matter how I treat people..." Jungkook reminisced about what Sooyoung told him whenever he made decisions that didn't sit right with people, like purchasing luxurious items, clubbing on weekdays, and smoking pot. "That I should be loved just the way I am, that if they can't accept me, then they don't deserve me."

It sounded so romantic, especially coming from the love of his life. Who wouldn't fall head over heels for someone who knew how to love your flaws?

"I'm full of shit then." You replied. "If you really care about someone, then you should help them to get better. You shouldn't teach them to love the things that are destructive—the things that should be changed. You're not allowing them to grow by condoning something wrong."

Instead of taking your speech seriously, Jungkook just laughed.

"Wow. Big words. You hit your head that hard, huh?"

You grinned too, understanding at once that Jungkook hated conversations like this.

"We both did."

Again, he didn't respond, but you were right. Both of you hit your head and both of you changed.

You changed into a better person while he changed into a monster.

You were right. He had been treating people around him badly. He was frustrated.

"You need to wash your hair, Jungkook."

Jungkoom hummed, enjoying the feeling of your fingers running through his dark locks. His hair grew fast.

"Seriously. When did you last wash your hair? It stinks. I can see your dandruff—"

"Hey!" He winced, clearly offended. "I wanted to wash my hair...I just...." He sighed, biting his lower lip. "This is all new to me, you know? What if I slipped on the tub?"

The smile on your face disappeared, heart leaping up to your throat. Empathy was also patting your shoulders.

Jungkook was having a difficult time because of his damaged eyes.

"Maybe we can ask Jackson to help you?" You enquired tentatively. Jackson was one of Jungkook's caregivers. You figured he could help your husband wash up if he's not comfortable with the female caregivers.

Jungkook scoffed though.

"You think I'm letting a man near my dick?"

"Jungkook..." You exhaled loudly. Here we go again. "That's literally Jackson's job. He's helped a lot of people like you before. I can assure you there would be no malice—"

"I said no, Sooyoung." He smacked his lips together, annoyed.

You didn't know how else to help him so you just remained quiet.

Jungkook felt like he had been stabbed in the heart when he noticed the shift in your behavior.

He upset you. Again.

"What if..." Jungkook drew in a breath and your ears perked up.

You smiled.

So he's offering an alternative now? That's....a progress, right?

"What if you help me take a bath instead?"

Immediately, you lost your smile.

"Jungkook—"

"What? I'm your husband," he cut you off. "You seemed okay to me now. You can move around. Hell, you even brought me outside."

You knew where he was going. His reasoning made sense too. Technically speaking, you were still his caregiver.

It was your job to help him bathe.

"Please, jagiya." He held your hand that was resting on the push handle of the wheelchair. Jungkook could walk but he's limping. He's undergoing physical therapy but as usual, he needed to be convinced to do it. Jungkook hated using white cane too.

"You said I stink. I know..." He squeezed your hand. "I can smell myself. My scalp itches too."

"Fine," in the end, you relented, reminding yourself that this was part of your job. "Let's go take a bath, you big boy."

Jungkook broke into a boyish grin. He didn't let go of your hand until you reached your shared bedroom.

Helping your husband take a bath wasn't as grueling as you originally thought it would be.

Jungkook was pretty cooperative. When you asked him to get into the tub, he immediately complied. His legs wobbled though.

He wasn't used to walking again so you had to assist him.

Jungkook took off his shirt the moment he got into the tub, causing you to stifle a gasp. Jungkook had a nice body for an eighteen years old. His mother told you he liked going to the gym before the accident.

This was why he had deep collarbones, abs, and toned back muscle. Very pleasing to the eyes, but as much you liked looking at his body, you had to look away when he started to unbutton his pants.

"Sooyoung..." He called your attention, forcing you to cast your gaze back to him.

Jungkook was handing you his dirty clothes.

You grabbed them and then you adjusted the temperature of the heater, asking him if he preferred hot or lukewarm water.

"Hot, jagiya. Please..." He closed his eyes, leaning against the wall as he tried to relax his muscles.

You turned on the faucet, causing Jungkook to moan. He missed the feeling of warm water cascading down his skin.

"I'm gonna wash your hair, Kookie..." It's that nickname again. This time, Jungkook didn't tense when you mentioned it.

You proceeded to wash his hair. Jungkook closed his eyes, a contented sigh escaping his lips from time to time.

Your hands on his hair were softer than he remembered.

It took you five minutes to really wash his hair. When you stopped, Jungkook opened his eyes.

"Done already?" He was pouting.

You couldn't help it. You smiled. He looked so innocent, so adorable.

"You're big enough to wash your body." You handed him the soap.

Jungkook pouted more but he didn't complain. He just started washing his body.

He couldn't stop thinking about how nice it must have felt to feel your hands all over his body though, especially on his dick.

But Jungkook wouldn't tell you that.

Not yet.

Jungkook's mood was lifted after a good warm bath. He didn't throw a tantrum for the rest of the day.

You thought your talk in the garden earlier this day also helped him navigate his feelings.

Days later, Jungkook officially turned into a much better patient.

"I'm full, Nayeon-ssi." He politely rejected his caregiver's offer to add more food on his plate.

Nayeon was pleased to hear Jungkook say this. Beaming, she took his plate and asked if he wanted dessert.

"I'd like some dasik." Jungkook requested and one of their helpers immediately provided him this sweet treat.

Jungkook sniffed the dessert first before taking a bite. His stomach churned while eating. Jungkook was learning how to eat on his own, but sometimes it was difficult.

He felt like crying every time he sniffed his food before actually eating. He missed those times when he could see the lovely detail of this dessert. Right now, he could only smell to know the flavor of what he was munching.

A green tea dasik.

His tears threatened to fall but he inhaled deeply to stop it from trickling down his cheeks.

He promised you he'd do better. He couldn't lose his cool just because he couldn't see what he was eating.

He was bigger than his disability.

"Thanks for the food." Jungkook bowed to no one in particular after finishing his lunch. He could only hope that he was facing his helpers as he bowed to them.

Nayeon helped him sit back on his wheelchair.

"Where do you want to go, Mr. Jeon?" The caregiver enquired.

To my wife. Jungkook bit his tongue before he could say this. You were probably resting in your shared bedroom. You said you didn't feel well.

"Is it too late to make an appointment with my physical therapist today?"

Nayeon was taken aback by Jungkook's request. Was this another miracle?

"No! Not at all, Mr. Jeon..."

Jungkook smiled. Good. He'd get better soon.

The following weeks you spent with Jungkook passed by like a blink of an eye.

Everything seemed to be going smooth these days, unlike your first week in this mansion. Actually, Jungkook still demanded your presence from time to time, but he wasn't acting like a brat whenever you couldn't tend to his needs.

Take for instance the case of Min Yoongi, a client of yours who called you yesterday morning to ask if you could look after his grandmother for that day. Yoongi had a business meeting outside the city. He said he couldn't cancel it since it was an emergency. You were the only caregiver who crossed his mind, mainly because Mrs. Min, his grandmother, couldn't stop talking about you. For her, you were the best caregiver ever.

You couldn't say no to Mrs. Min. Admittedly, she was the best patient for you too. She wasn't hard to deal with. Mrs. Min actually listened when you told her that no, she couldn't eat another pudding.

Yoongi arrived back in Seoul at around eleven pm. He kept saying sorry for monopolizing your time. Your agreement with him was that you were only going to look after his grandmother till 5pm, but time continued to tick and Yoongi was still nowhere to be seen.

He wasn't answering your calls. By 10:50pm, you decided to call Jang-mi to tell her you couldn't make it home tonight. You didn't have the heart to leave Mrs. Min all by herself.

But just as when you're getting ready to sleep on the couch, you heard someone opening the door.

It was Yoongi.

The first thing he did was to bow down to you and apologize. He looked like a mess. His eyes were red and he was catching his breath. Yoongi looked like he aged three times since you saw him this morning.

It was then that you decided to cut him some slack. He clearly needed rest. Yoongi was sweet, despite his apparent exhaustion, he still offered to drop you home.

You declined the offer because Jang-mi told you to ring their driver whenever you're ready to go back to the mansion.

The Jeons were very understanding. They weren't demanding you to stay with Jungkook 24/7 even though it was clear it's what your husband wanted.

"Where'd you go?" Was the first thing he said to you the moment you stepped inside your shared bedroom.

It was already 11:42pm.

Jungkook couldn't sleep because he was waiting for you.

"It's late. Why are you still awake?" You dodged his question by asking him a question.

Jungkook was sitting on his bed, the pillow carrying the weight of the back of his head.

"Couldn't sleep. I was waiting for you." He pursed his lips into a thin line. "So where'd you go? I haven't seen you all day."

You left this morning while he was still sleeping. Of course you asked for the permission of the Jeons. You just didn't know what excuse they told Jungkook when he asked where you went.

"Just out," you uttered your usual excuse as you headed towards your bed.

Jungkook's expression remained unreadable. For some reason, it made you feel guilty, so you added "work. I went to work."

You thought this answer would somehow reassure him; however, it looked like you messed things up more.

You saw how his impassive face turned into ice. His jaw ticked, hands balling into a fist.

"Okay," but in the end, Jungkook simply exhaled calmly. He switched off the lamp beside his bed. "Good night, Sooyoung."

He didn't wait for your response as he was already turning away from you.

Your heart fell.

You two slept on separate beds but you normally faced each other, talking about random things until you fell asleep, sometimes Jungkook would ask you to sing to him.

This night was different though.

The air was colder, the room was quiet, and for the first time since you got here, Jungkook slept with his back facing you.

Guilt.

This was what you felt the morning after you went to the house of the Mins.

Jungkook woke up before you, asking Momo, his caregiver of the day, to accompany him to the garden. When you found out about this, your heart started to feel like it was being squeezed.

Jungkook usually pestered you to join him in the garden to enjoy the sunlight while drinking his favorite chocolate chip frappé. He had a sweet tooth, making you cringe sometimes. He liked adding four pumps of chocolate syrup on his already sweet drink.

You wondered if he was enjoying this drink right now.

You could've been the one accompanying him. You scoffed at the little voice inside your head, it was funny that it popped up whenever you felt like shit.

Yes. You felt terrible for not telling Jungkook the truth last night—wait. You did tell him the truth! You just didn't dive into details.

Was it wrong?

Yes, you idiot. The voice said.

You sighed. Maybe you were an idiot. You weren't even sure if Sooyoung had a job. The Jeons failed to mention this very crucial information to you.

Maybe you should talk to them. You had to ask what excuse they gave Jungkook about your whereabouts yesterday.

"We may have told Jungkook you're a..." Jang-mi winced, as if she was uncomfortable to tell you the truth. "A slut."

You gasped. Of course you fucking gasped. Why would they say that?

"Not you though," Jinjoo corrected her sister immediately. You, Mrs. Jeon, and her daughters were discussing here at their breakfast nook while you all watched Jungkook enjoy his frappé through the floor length window.

Momo was talking to Jungkook but the latter didn't look like he was listening. A frown was etched on his face.

Was it because of what happened last night?

"Sooyoung. We told Jungkook his wife is a slut." Jinjoo explained to you that Sooyoung was a stripper. She and Jungkook actually met in a club when Jungkook was only seventeen.

Their brother used a fake identification card and their parents' money to get into the club. Sooyoung knew Jungkook was a minor but she still pursued him. All for money, obviously.

"That's why he got so upset when I told him I was at work last night," you grunted, too annoyed with yourself.

Jungkook probably thought his wife was cheating on him. Damn it.

"Yeah, because we just proved him wrong. Now he can't face us." Jinjoo scowled.

Jungkook was already upset even before you arrived at the mansion. The Jeons told you they had an argument with Jungkook during lunch time.

Apparently, Mrs. Jeons' daughters kept on talking shit about Sooyoung, causing Jungkook to explode. He was so mad at his family. He questioned why they took you and him back to this mansion if they're just going to disrespect you.

It was your idea. Jungkook told you before that he didn't want to live with his family, that you two could rent a small apartment, but Mrs. Jeon shook her head at you. The deal was that you'd live in their estate until Jungkook's surgery. Besides, you didn't want to live alone with him.

You weren't a real couple. You were just his caregiver.

"It doesn't matter." Mrs. Jeon clasped her hands together. "I think it's better if he thinks that way. He needs to fall out of love with Sooyoung. It will save him from the heartbreak when it's time for you to leave."

When it's time for you to leave. You didn't know why this statement felt like a punch in the gut.

The Jeons dismissed you after that. You still felt guilty though. It's strange when Jungkook's not following you like a lost puppy.

Make it up to him. The voice was back.

You heaved a deep sigh, fidgeting. Should you do something?

Yes. Make him happy.

"Damn it." You cussed and without thinking much about it, you barged into your shared bedroom.

Jungkook looked startled when he heard the door opened.

"Sorry." You apologized sheepishly. Jungkook was sitting on the bed, squishing the massage ball in his hands.

He shrugged nonchalantly, like it didn't bother him—like he didn't care that you were here.

That felt like another punch in the gut. Fuck. Why were you feeling like this?

"How's your morning?" You enquired, still fidgeting.

"Nothing new." Jungkook shrugged again. His entire attention was focused on the massage ball. He was squeezing it with so much force.

"Well..." You licked your lower lip as you played with the doorknob. Damn it. Why were you so nervous?

You didn't do anything wrong.

"Do you want to do something new?"

Jungkook scoffed. He scoffed at something you said.

"Like what? It's not like blind people have many options." He raised the massage ball in the air, like he was proving to you that his life was completely useless.

It pained you that he thought this way.

"Jungkook..." You called softly. His jaw just clenched.

"I'm going to sleep." He threw the ball on the floor. It bounced once before rolling off near the foot of the bed.

You swallowed thickly.

"You already slept for nine hours, Jungkook." You let go of the doorknob. "Why don't we do something fun instead?"

If he was excited, Jungkook didn't let you see it. His stoic expression remained as he asked what's on your mind.

"Amusement park. Let's go to Lotte World..."

It was a bad idea.

You knew you weren't supposed to go on a date with Jungkook. Mrs. Jeon said it's better if her son would fall out of love with Sooyoung.

You should help do this, yet you're doing the exact opposite of it.

Jungkook was falling deeper in love with Sooyoung because of you.

"I'm so happy we're doing this!" You had been with Jungkook for weeks now, sometimes you stayed by his side 24/7. You thought you had seen every emotion he was capable of feeling.

Mostly it's just anger and frustration.

He looked different today.

Jungkook's face was glowing. His toothy grin was on full display. You wondered how he looked if his eyes were sparkling. Jang-mi told you his brother's eyes were the best part of him: wide and doe. It would be very challenging to say no when he stared at you using his biggest asset.

"Jungkook! Let's try this!" You didn't wait for his approval before forcing him to wear devil horns headband.

"Sooyoung," he grimaced at you, lips pouting as he angrily touched the horns.

He groaned, saying that he wasn't evil.

"No, you're not. You're a bunny boy." You giggled, making him groan. He hated being treated like a baby.

"Are you wearing something too?" He touched your head, feeling the design of your headband in his hand.

He huffed when he realized you're wearing an angel halo.

"This is unfair! I'm not a devil!" He repeated which earned a chuckle from you.

He was right though. He wasn't a devil. You were actually the evil one here. You're a fraudster, acting like you were better than his white cane from guiding him.

You weren't. Jungkook had to trust himself before he decided to use the white cane.

Jungkook didn't have to trust you before he decided to rely on you. You just popped into the scene, forcing him to believe you were here for him.

"Let's try more rides?" You brushed off the guilt engulfing you by clearing your throat.

Jungkook beamed, telling you he wanted to ride the ferris wheel.

The two of you had already tried almost all rides fit to Jungkook's condition, thanks to the priority seating lane, you didn't have to wait long.

"Ah. I want this to be our last ride," Jungkook uttered as you helped him get inside the cabin of the ferris wheel.

"You bet. We've tried almost all rides. I'm tired!" You complained playfully.

You were tired but not bored. Jungkook was the best companion in a place like this.

"Yeah, I know. That's why I wanna thank you," Jungkook sounded sincere, his cheeks were turning red, like he was shy to admit this.

"You're my husband, Jungkook. I'd do anything for you." A lie.

A lie you shouldn't have said. What were you doing? This wasn't part of the contract.

But the Jeons told you to look after him. You're just doing that. How convenient that the voice inside your head was suddenly back.

Your lips pursed as Jungkook elucidated how much he appreciated this day.

"Glad to hear that, Sooyoung-ah. Although I never thought you'd bring me here. You said you hate going to amusement parks. You called me childish when I bought us tickets here, remember?"

Something pricked at your heart from the inside when you heard Jungkook's chuckle. He was grinning but you could hear the pain in his voice.

"I hit my head hard, remember?" You mimicked his joke from weeks before.

His smile grew bigger as his hand found yours. Slowly, he intertwined your fingers, sighing when he felt how warm your hand was.

It was more intense than he remembered. Jungkook never felt like he was being electrified when he touched Sooyoung's hand before.

Today, he felt like there were butterflies in his stomach. He felt hot too, like a teenager who finally found the courage to admit his feelings to his crush.

This moment felt like a new beginning.

"How's it?" Jungkook enquired after a moment of stillness. The wind blew harsher, making him realize that you two were on the top now.

You didn't answer.

"I mean the view..." He corrected when he realized that his question was vague. "How does it look?"

Jungkook was still holding your left hand, and so you used your right hand to take off his sunglasses.

Jungkook squinted, not used to the blinding lights. His heart recoiled when you gently pushed the hair covering his eyes to the side.

It revealed his eyes more.

"It's beautiful, Kookie..."

Shivers ran down his spine. For some reason, he felt like you were staring at him instead of the view.

You smiled because his gut feeling was right. You were looking at him and it was that moment when you realized that there's nothing more beautiful than the boy who used to have doe eyes.

You and Jungkook collapsed on your separate beds the moment you reached home.

"Jungkook, I need to help you wash up first. You stink." You teased while trying to sit on the bed. You needed to pull yourself together. You still had responsibilities.

Unfortunately Jungkook wasn't making your job easier. He groaned, covering himself with a blanket as he hugged his pillow.

"I'm so tired, jagiya. I can't even open my eyes..." He yawned.

You mirrored his action. You were so tired that when you saw him close his eyes, you did too.

Groan.

Your eyes flickered open. It was that sound again. The same sound that caused you to instantly get up to attend to Jungkook who was breathing heavily.

"N-No!" He choked, expression twisting to hurt and discomfort. Beads of sweat formed in his head.

"Kookie..." You lightly called him, which was the complete opposite of how you shake him awake.

Four taps later, Jungkook finally opened his eyes. He sat up on the bed almost immediately, his chest heaved violently as he turned to face you.

"S-Sooyoung!" He sobbed, throwing his arms around you. He breathed you in heavily as if he was scared you're gonna disappear.

"Ssshh..." And so you tried to dismiss that silly idea. You were here. You were not gonna leave. "It's okay, love. It's just a dream."

"A nightmare!" He corrected you. His forehead hit your collarbone so hard you felt like he was going to crush it.

Jungkook breathed in your scent once again. Everything was different. Did he remember things differently? Or did things just change?

Why did he feel like you were not the Sooyoung he loved?

Why did his heart clench in a good way whenever you assured him everything was alright? Why were you so sweet and why did he like you better this way?

"I— I saw it. They're going to take you away from me..." He weeped while gripping on the hem of your shirt as if his life depended on it.

Jungkook had nightmares before but he never talked about it. Admittedly, his dreadful dreams were the only ones he kept away from you. He shut himself down whenever you asked what happened while he was sleeping. Jungkook never answered you. There was even this time when he went as far as snapping at you when you insisted on knowing the details of his dream.

He looked so broken that you had to let it go. You knew forcing him to share only brought him pain.

"No one's going to take me away from you." You assured him because you had a feeling this was the better thing to do. People tended to share more on their own. You wanted him to trust you on his own and not just because you coaxed him to do so.

"You don't understand! I saw it!" He insisted. "The light pulled you and you just gave in. You didn't even fight! It's...it's like you want to leave! I kept calling your name but you never looked back! Not even once—"

"Kookie." You had to cut him off. He was hyperventilating. His body trembled and the neckline of your shirt was wet with his tears.

You tried to grab his shoulders, forcing him to focus on you. He didn't. He pushed you away, flinching terribly when you touched him.

"Stop it! Stop it! Just fucking stop it!" He cried. Stress and terror were evident on his face. "Stop acting like nothing bothers you! Like everything is okay! It's not!"

His voice was strained from screaming. The Jeons knew Jungkook was having nightmares from time to time. A few weeks ago, they barged into your shared room to make sure everything was fine, but they realized Jungkook became more agitated when he was surrounded by people.

You couldn't blame him. It was really frightening to be around people, especially when you're the only one who couldn't see them. Being alone in the dark was the worst.

"You!" He choked back a sob. He failed. He sputtered angry words. "You almost died because of me! You should hate me! You said you don't love me so why?" He was shouting right in front of your face, spit everywhere.

His face was surrounded by darkness. You hated seeing him like this.

"Why are you still here? You said you're gonna divorce me! Why haven't you—"

You pulled him to your chest but he started squirming against your hold. Tears continued to roll down his cheeks.

You embraced him until he stopped struggling. He was so tired he just let you hold him.

He didn't speak. You chose not to assure him things would be okay soon. No. You couldn't do that now that he told you how it made him feel.

Jungkook hated himself. He felt like you kept your frustration to yourself because you didn't want to upset him.

What he didn't know was that you just didn't know how to react. You didn't know what happened between him and Sooyoung. Hell, you weren't even aware that his late wife wanted to divorce him.

Jungkook thought you were holding back whenever he tried to talk to you about the day of the accident. What he wasn't aware of was that you didn't say anything because you didn't know anything, and that he was wrong:

you were not Kang Sooyoung. You were not the girl he loved.

That night, Jungkook refused to be comforted by you. He stopped struggling to get away, but it didn't mean he liked that you were holding him.

He also refused your offer to sing him a lullaby. He told you he was tired and that he didn't need unnecessary noise.

You went back to your own bed upon hearing that.

Jungkook, just like what he did last night, turned his back on you again.

A week passed since Jungkook dreamt about you being taken away from him.

Seven days and he was still giving you the cold shoulder.

"Where's Jungkook?" You asked Chaeyoung, another caregiver of your husband.

"Ah," she smiled at you. "He's with Taehyung and Jimin."

Oh.

He's accepting visitors now? You heard all about Kim Taehyung and Park Jimin, Jungkook's two best friends. Mrs. Jeon said her son was an introvert, he didn't really like interacting with many people.

Before Jungkook met Sooyoung, Mrs. Jeon claimed that all he ever did was stay in his room to play video games, the piano, and hangout with Taehyung and Jimin.

Mrs. Jeon also told you not to worry about Jungkook's friends. Apparently, they knew all about you. They promised to keep their mouth glued together since they believed the Jeons knew what was best for Jungkook.

They asked you to pretend to be Sooyoung for a good reason.

You weren't so sure about this anymore though. Were you helping Jungkook? Or were you just making things worse?

You're helping him. Jinjoo's voice echoed inside your head. Jungkook's sister told you that the only reason why Jungkook pushed through physical therapy was because he wanted to become a better person for you.

Jungkook spent the past weeks going to his therapist. He could walk straight now, legs no longer wobbling. He still needed assistance though. Jungkook sometimes lost his patience and he told you many times he hated his white cane.

The only time you didn't hear him complain about his cane was when you visited the amusement park together.

"He seems sad these days, you know? I'm happy his friends visited him." Chaeyoung said. She also told you Jungkook and his friends were currently in the studio room.

Jungkook had his own studio in this estate. The Jeons said Jungkook's dream was to become a pianist. He gave up on his dream when he met Sooyoung.

It's like Jungkook's whole world turned black and all the colors he saw were dancing inside Sooyoung's eyes.

That's how much he adored her.

"Yeah. Good for him." This was the last thing you said to Chaeyoung and then you walked away, leaving her alone to do her job.

Ten days.

It took you this long to surrender to the voice inside your head that's telling you to patch things up with Jungkook.

"Where's Jungkook?" Seemed to be the only question you knew how to ask the caregivers. This time it was Dahyun who had to answer you.

"In his studio..."

You sighed upon hearing this. Don't get it wrong. You're glad he's doing something not just productive but also something he loved. However, the ugly feeling in your stomach wouldn't stop attacking you thinking that he's avoiding you.

Jungkook barely left his studio. There were times he chose to sleep there too, leaving you all alone in your shared bedroom.

You didn't know when you started missing his presence. You just knew something inside of you felt hollow without him by your side.

"Is he with Taehyung and Jimin?" You asked another question.

"No, he's alone. The boys haven't been back since last week."

"Okay. Thanks, Dahyun." You didn't waste any more time. You went to the second floor of the mansion to visit Jungkook in his studio.

You knocked on the door thrice before you heard Jungkook's soft voice telling you it's okay to come in.

His soft voice was not the same with his facial expression though.

There he was, sitting in front of his black grand piano with his brow pinched together. His eyes were close as he massaged his throbbing temple.

"Kookie?"

Jungkook visibly tensed upon hearing you call his name.

Oh.

He certainly didn't expect you to come here. He thought Dahyun was the one who knocked to bring him snacks.

"You busy?" You asked carefully. Jungkook heard you playing with the doorknob again, a habit you did whenever you felt nervous or shy.

"No. My head hurts." He admitted with a grunt.

You furrowed your brows, worried he was overworking himself.

"Maybe rest first? You've been working hard since morning." You closed the door when you found the courage to really go inside of his studio. He said you could come in, right?

"Working hard?" He scoffed, like you said a terrible joke. "If sitting for hours in front of this piano is called working hard, then I guess congratulations to me! I have accomplished literally nothing."

Jungkook grabbed the sheet music, crumpling it angrily as he added "I can't even read this shit," and then he threw it on the ground.

He sure knew how to throw a fit. Jungkook turned into a kid when he's frustrated.

Jungkook felt you moving towards him. You crouched to pick up the crumpled paper, causing him to suck in a breath.

He worried you thought he's being a brat again. He sighed, opening up. "It's just so frustrating."

You hummed to let him know you're listening.

"I keep playing the same song because I can't read what's in that." He attempted to point at the sheet music in your hand, but since he couldn't see, he ended up pointing at your face.

You bit your lip, thinking that he was frustrated with you too.

Jungkook continued his rant, expressing that it was hard to rely on his muscle memory, especially when all he wanted was to learn to play new songs.

He also called himself names. You realized Jungkook's directing his anger towards himself now.

"Jungkook." You touched his shoulder, hoping it would stop him from uttering mean things about himself.

He did. He froze at your touch.

"You don't always have to try new things to be considered good at something, you know?" You rubbed his shoulders in an attempt to calm him down. You could see him holding his breath. It was apparent he couldn't relax in your presence.

"Repetition isn't always bad. It's okay to do something over and over again and still end up falling in love with it." You smiled. "If doing the same thing is bad, then why do some people still light a second stick of cigarette? Why do we still smile upon seeing the face of the person we love? Despite seeing them all the time? Why do people...make love every night?"

You didn't wait for his response.

"The thing is, doing the same thing doesn't necessarily equate to the same feeling. Every day, we experience something new."

You watched Jungkook gulp, like he was really pondering your words. He stayed quiet for a while before he let out a deep breath.

"You're right." He exhaled once more. "I mean...I've been practicing playing this certain song and I never get bored. I guess it evokes different feelings every time."

A smile finally bloomed on his face as he reminisced the moment he played that mentioned song.

"Can you play it for me?" You requested before you could stop yourself. A big part of you wanted to hear him play. The Jeons told you he's really great.

Jungkook hummed in agreement. He spread his legs, patting his thigh as he urged you to sit there. "Okay. C'mere..."

Your body was moving before you could even think about it. Jungkook dug his fingers into your hip, gently pulling you to sit on his lap.

You stifle a gasp when you felt something twitch in his sweatpants.

Jungkook didn't seem fazed by it so you ignored it too. Besides, you didn't have time to think about it since you felt like your mind had been pulled into another dimension when Jungkook started playing In All Honesty, I Do using the piano.

Your eyes lingered on Jungkook's hands, his long fingers hitting the keys with precision. It was like he was born to do something as amazing as this.

You leaned against Jungkook's chest when you felt him loosened up. He was finally at ease even though you were close to him—too close to the point that you felt his hot breath on your shoulders. He was breathing loudly.

You closed your eyes, feeling the music deep in your bones. You were too lost in the feeling that you didn't even flinch when you felt Jungkook's lips pressing feathery kisses on the side of your neck.

His wet lips moved south, kissing and nibbling at your shoulders.

Your neck craned, parting your lips in pleasure. It felt so good.

At some point, you started grinding on his lap, loving the way his cock hit your center.

"Jagiya," your core heated at the sound of his low grunts.

Lost. You were still so lost at the feeling of his lips against your skin and the music filling your ears.

You threw your head back, little moans and cries escaping your lips as you rubbed yourself against his bulge, seeking more friction.

Jesus fucking Christ. He felt so big and good.

Jungkook's groans were loud and the music—oh, God the music. He was hitting random keys with a controlled amount of weight and power. Forte. Crescendo.

Jungkook could feel it. He was close. Accelerando.

"Sooyoung...fuck." Accelerando.

He stopped hitting the keys, hands finding its way cup your tits.

His stomach clenched, breath so ragged against your nape it made goosebumps appear on your skin.

Jungkook let go.

You felt the wetness on his sweatpants staining the back of your thighs, it was followed by a loud thud—his forehead hitting your shoulder blade.

You peeled your eyes open at the realization of what just happened, your blood running cold as you bit your trembling lips.

You recoiled.

In horror.

In Shame.

In Disgust.

"Sooyoung?" Jungkook called, confused when you abruptly got into your feet.

"I— I need to go." You excused yourself, not waiting for him to answer. You didn't even look at him.

How could you?

You were humiliated. You took advantage of Jungkook and his disability.

You weren't just a fraudster. You're a disgusting slut.

Jungkook came.

He really fucking came under five minutes.

Should he be ashamed?

Yes. Definitely. He took care of his needs before his wife, but...how could he stop himself?

You felt so good. So fucking hot. You were right. Doing the same thing evoked a different feeling every time.

You didn't kiss him, didn't touch his dick. You grind on his lap but that's the end of it. What the fuck happened? How could you make him come in his pants just by doing that?

It took him fucking Sooyoung's mouth before he become hard. What changed? Was it time? The accident? The music?

Why couldn't he get enough of you?

"Fuck." Jungkook groaned as his forehead hit the keys of the piano, producing an ugly sound.

You stormed out of the room, leaving him all hot and bothered. His stomach dropped, face twisting in pain and humiliation with the realization that you left.

Jungkook couldn't follow you.

Your chest felt heavy. It was like a machete was stuck in your heart, every time you moved, it dug deeper—so deep it made you weak.

You took advantage of Jungkook.

He was vulnerable and you used it for your sick pleasure. You swore you didn't know what you were doing though.

It was like you were coax to grind on him, to allow him to suck and bite at your neck and shoulders.

You touched the side of your neck that was still tingling because of Jungkook’s sloppy kisses.

You shivered at the feeling—of Jungkook kissing you and Mr. Jeon calling your name.

"Are you okay?" Mr. Jeon, Jungkook's father, asked. His brows were knitted as he stared at you with worry sparkling in his eyes.

You were currently at Mr. Jeon's office room. He asked one of their helpers to tell you he wanted to see you.

"Huh?" You blinked, distracted by the events that unfolded in Jungkook's studio room hours ago.You couldn't seem to focus on other things. Chaeyoung actually told you to rest when a plate slipped out of your hands, shattering.

"You are not okay," Mr. Jeon answered his query. He wasn't the type of person who would touch someone without their permission. Normally, he didn't even bother shaking the hands of his clients. He had to grab your wrist though. It looked like you needed support even though you were sitting on a chair; your face screamed agony, eyes hazy from unshed tears.

You were biting your quivering lips.

This was exactly the reason why he wanted to see you. Mr. Jeon was very observant. You didn't look thrilled that you were pretending to be Sooyoung, but ever since you got here, this was the only time he saw you looking so....dejected.

Was it because Jungkook?

"Did he..." He abruptly let go of your wrist, it was as though you were burning his skin. "Did my son..."

Mr. Jeon kept on trailing off. He spoke slowly too, barely getting words out of his mouth.

You had seen Mr. Jeon many times since you got here; however, you hadn't had the chance to talk to him. He was distant and cold. He had the same expression as Jungkook's when he didn't like something. Their only difference was that Jungkook threw tantrums like a kid. His father, on the other hand, expressed his distaste through logic.

He was the only person in Jungkook's life who was so against the idea of you pretending to be his son's late wife.

"Did he hurt you?" You weren't sure if you were tripping or if his teeth were chattering.

You instantly defended Jungkook. "No." He did not hurt me. I hurt him. I took advantage of him. You wanted to say, yet you pressed your lips together.

Your answer caused relief to wash over him.

Mr. Jeon didn't raise his kid to hurt people, especially women. He had a wife and two daughters. He wouldn't appreciate it if people hurt the women in his life. He knew he needed to teach his son manners to avoid karma.

"You're sure?"

"Yes." You don't understand. I'm the one who hurt your son.

"If it's not Jungkook..." He trailed off again, clasping his hands, Mr. Jeon debated whether he should ask personal questions or dismiss you.

"Then who's making you sad?" He chose the former option. "What's making you sad?"

You couldn't answer so you just balled your hand into a fist. Mr. Jeon sighed.

"It's none of my business, I know..." He stared into your eyes. You did too, noticing that he looked like his son.

You briefly wondered if Jungkook's eyes used to be this bright as well.

"I just hope you're not having a hard time because of my son. You and my family know very well that I am not pleased with this plan." He said this many times already.

"But I can't let him hurt any more people. He's caused enough damage."

You nodded, watching as the corner of his mouth quirk up.

"He didn't hurt me, Mr. Jeon. I promise you that." You repeated and it made him plaster a fake smile.

"I believe you now. Such a relief to know. I'm not sure if I can still cover up for him if he ends up messing things up with you."

Mr. Jeon saw it: your curious eyes, like you wanted to ask what he did to protect his son.

He faked a smile again, uttering your name and saying, "sometimes we do horrible things for the sake of our loved ones..."

Mr. Jeon paid people to clean Jungkook's mess. He used money to make sure the authorities, the media, and even those who knew Sooyoung wouldn't say something about her death.

You heard from Jinjoo that Sooyoung, just like you, was alone in life. She was an only child and her mother was a call-girl who got pregnant by one of her clients. The father didn't want to do anything with them.

Tough life.

"I need you to promise to tell me if Jungkook ever does something you don't like. I will deal with him." He swallowed thickly. "Accordingly."

The only thing you could do was nod. Not because you agreed—you didn't. You were a hypocrite. To do horrible things for the sake of our loved ones.What a bull. We shouldn't.

You used to be so against this idea. You even told Jungkook to change for the better and don't just settle with 'that's how I do it' or 'that's just who I am.'

Things changed, because right now you found yourself tight-lipped, just wanting this conversation to be over.

Bull.

You were not better than Jungkook or his father because just like them, you did horrible things too.

Whatever this game you and Jungkook were playing, well...it wasn't fun anymore.

When you did something he didn't like, he would not talk to you.

If he had done something to upset you, you wouldn't talk to him too.

You two always gave each other a hard time, always dodging the bullet and as a revenge, you threw grenades.

You kept avoiding Jungkook and he was tired of it, so days after the incident in the studio room, he decided to defuse the bomb before it exploded right in his face.

"Sooyoung-ah..." Jungkook called you early in the morning. You just woke up but you're already hurrying to get out of bed.

Jungkook hated it. He had been waiting for you to wake up so he could talk to you. Why were you making it so difficult?

"I need to prepare your breakfast." You wriggled out of his grasp when he grabbed your wrist.

Sigh.

"I'm not hungry. We need to talk."

You shook your head.

"I don't have anything to say to you." Wriggle. Wriggle.

"I need to talk to you." He corrected himself.

You managed to pull your hand away.

"Later." You rushed towards the door, unfortunately Jungkook was stubborn enough to follow you.

He stumbled without his cane, body bumping into the pole of his four-poster bed.

Your head snapped to his direction the second you heard him yelp in pain.

"Jungkook!" You attended to him at once.

He groaned, rubbing his forehead that turned red. You saw a small bump forming on it.

"Shit. Sit down, I'll get an ice pack." You helped him sit on the bed as you examined his forehead. It didn't look that bad but your stomach still stirred. Jungkook's expression told you he was in a lot of pain.

You were about to leave the room; however, Jungkook gripped the hem of your shirt tightly.

"Don't go, jagiya..." He pleaded. The lump in his throat made his tone shaky. He looked like a kicked puppy.

"Jungkook," you called his name as you pushed his hair back. A sigh left your lips. "You're hurt, baby. I need to take care—"

Your voice drowned to nothingness when he pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his face in your stomach.

"It doesn't hurt much. Please...just stay with me." You flinched because you're ticklish. You could feel Jungkook's hot breath on your stomach. The fabric of your shirt was thin.

You weren't sure what compelled you to stay still, allowing Jungkook to embrace and inhale your lovely scent.

You smelled different. Good different, a little less intense than the real Sooyoung. She smelled passion, you smelled comfort.

You waited until Jungkook let you go. It took him long though. He pulled you to sit next to him right after breaking off the embrace.

You two stayed quiet. Jungkook chose to play with your fingers. His head was hanging low, like he was embarrassed or something like that.

"Jungkook....you think I don't see you wincing?" You tilted your head, Jungkook avoided your stare. "I know you're in pain. Please, let me get an ice pack...you can play with my fingers later."

Jungkook's head snapped up. He pouted his lips.

"You're treating me like a child."

"Because you're acting like one." You bopped his nose, chuckling lightly at the small bump on his forehead.

"I'm acting like a child?" He scoffed, shoving your hand away so he could fold his arms over his chest. "Says the one who's been ignoring me for—"

He suddenly stopped speaking. Jungkook sucked in a breath and then shook his head.

He was still pouting his lips.

"You know what? It doesn't matter. That's...that's not what I want to say," he rubbed his nape, his cheeks were red.

"What I wanna do is...apologize..." The color staining his cheeks turned brighter. Your heart swelled with adoration. Why was he so charming?

"I...I shouldn't have..." He was having a hard time formulating his statement. Jungkook gulped. This was the first time he was glad he couldn't see your reaction.

"Come like that. I—I...it's wrong to say I'm caught in the moment because I should be thinking about your comfort above anything else. I guess I'm just...excited? It's been a while and I...."

He kept swallowing hard.

"I just missed you so much, jagiya. B-But I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable.... If I touched or did something you don't like, please tell me." Because how was he supposed to know when you didn't speak? He couldn't see your expression.

You didn't tell him to stop.

"If it makes you feel any better...then I'll...I'll never touch you again," it pained him to say this. Jungkook wanted to stay by your side, to feel you, to touch you. The thought of not being able to do this hurt like hell.

Without knowing it, his tears fell.

"Kookie..." You murmured, pushing his hair to the side again. It hurt. It hurt seeing him like this.

"I miss you. I miss you so much. I miss you every day." His voice was barely audible. You saw his hands trembling too, like he wanted to cup your face but was scared to scare you away again.

He was so afraid to mess up. He didn't realize it was this hard to be ignored. Jungkook avoided you because your presence was becoming too much. He was afraid he's gonna lose it if you decided to leave. That's what you said you'd do before the accident, right? You wanted to leave him.

He wanted to change your mind about it. He felt like the only way to do that was to give you space. He failed though. What happened in the studio was a clear sign that he failed. You left. You seemed disgusted with him and it hurt. It hurt so bad.

"I'm here, Jungkook." You reminded him. His hands were still aching to touch you.

You leaned closer to him, implying that it's okay. You wouldn't act as baffled like the last time.

You wanted this—it's part of your job, right? You had to make him feel good, to assure him it’s fine.

"Yeah..." He swallowed and it hurt. The lump hurt him. Everything hurt. His head too. He was pretending to be okay, but it hurt. It felt hot and it was throbbing, "but it's not enough. I crave you, jagiya..."

He could feel your heavy breathing fanning his face. Jungkook sucked in a deep breath.

His heartbeat doubled. His logic was dissipating. The only thing he wanted to do was to breathe you in.

You were so close.

Your nose touched his. Jungkook tilted his head, breath hitting your cheek.

He pursed his lips together. What to do? You smelled so good. He couldn't see but he could feel, like you were waiting for him to do the move.

"I crave you more than I did before..." He did. He cupped your cheeks using his quivering hands.

Your skin was hot. It felt good—to touch you like this.

"Kookie..." You called. So soft, as though you were begging him to do something.

"It's okay..." You added, tugging at his heartstrings.

Jungkook closed his eyes, lowering his head and kissing you on the mouth.

Gently.

Passionately.

And then hard.

Hungry. Lustful.

He giggled though. Jeon Jungkook giggled in between kisses, like a kid, like he won something.

He did.

He won. That moment, he felt like you truly wanted him. Too.

The thing you felt for Jungkook overrode the guilt that had been nudging you the past days. It's annoying and you blamed the little voice inside your head because of this.

Where was the voice when you needed it to mess up with you? Where was it when you needed it to say you fucked up? That you're playing with a very dangerous fire when you allowed Jungkook to kiss you?

When you wanted him to kiss you?

You wondered what the voice would say if it was poking your brain right now. But since it wasn't here, your mind wandered, thinking about your parents.

What would they say if they found out their daughter was not only a fraudster but also a bitch? Would they laugh at you? Snarl at you? Hate you?

Well...if they ended up hating you, then you could say you're all even. You hated your parents before. You hated that they abandoned you, like you were nothing.

They simply left you in a basket right in front of an orphanage. You didn't even have a name. You were a newborn. A fucking newborn. Someone in the orphanage gave you a name, your last name, on the contrary, was randomly chosen by the government.

Pathetic.

You felt helpless and this was when you realized you didn't want anybody to feel this way. You chose to be a caregiver for this same reason. No one guided you, no one took care of you.

You didn't want those who were helpless to feel like they're walking alone, that no one cared for them. It was the worst feeling. Ever.

Tears trickled down your face upon remembering your childhood. It was tough.

But you know what's more difficult?

"Hi," Jungkook.

Your husband was back. He climbed onto the bed, settling beside you.

"Can I sleep with you tonight?"

No. This was the right answer. This was what you should say.

"Okay," but both your heart and mind betrayed you.

You waited for it.

You waited for the voice to come back and sneer at you, unfortunately you were greeted by stillness—well...not really. Jungkook's soft plea was ringing inside your head.

Damn it. This was why you couldn't say no. His voice had magic. He knew how to use it to coax you to do what he wanted. It's so annoying.

You already spent the whole day acting like his wife. You did all things together. You even helped him wash his hair again.

Wasn't it enough? Why were you so greedy? Why did you like monopolizing Jungkook's time and attention?

"Jagiya?" Your train thoughts came into a halt when he called your name.

You hummed to let him know you were listening. You didn't dare speak though, too afraid to let him hear the tremor in your voice.

"Are you....sad?" He asked slowly.

When he didn't get any response from you, he sighed.

"I'm sorry." He apologized thinking that he upset you again. Jungkook pressed his lips together before proceeding. "I just...you sound sad..."

Jungkook couldn't see you but he could read you.

"I'm just tired, Kookie. We had a busy day, remember?"

"Oh," Jungkook was fiddling with the blanket. He suddenly stopped.

And then he cleared his throat.

"You..." He swallowed hard. The crimson color was staining his cheeks once again. "Do you...perhaps want me to make you feel better?"

Jungkook's voice was soft and shy, you weren't sure if you understood what he meant. Help you feel better by what?

Was he thinking what you're thinking?

"Aren't you tired?"

"N-No." He answered so fast that he choked. It was like he's gonna be in pain if he didn't respond immediately. "I wanna help you."

He inched closer to you.

"Just wanna help my wife feel better," the way he whispered this elicited an involuntary moan from you.

Jungkook smirked. This was exactly what he wanted to hear. He took this as a hint to snake his arms around your waist, pulling close.

"Please, jagiya...let me take care of you," he desperately murmured, his lips grazing your ear.

"Jungkook," you inhaled deeply, whimpering and gripping the bedsheet as he gently bit your ear.

"Yes, baby?" He said, voice low and hoarse, his hand groping your ass. "You like this?"

Jungkook's hand slid down to cup your heat from the back. He then hovered over you to silence your gasps using his mouth. He kissed you lightly at first, his tongue gently sucking on your lower lip. The soft pop was making you crazy.

"Jungkook," you mewled impatiently as you kissed him hard. You felt him smirk, clearly enjoying your eagerness as his hands travelled all over your body. He was taking his sweet time feeling your every inch of skin, like he was memorizing it.

Desire settled in the pit of your stomach when his long fingers slowly fiddled with the waistband of your satin shorts.

"Jungkook," you broke the kiss just to growl at him. What was taking him so fucking long? You thought he wanted to make you feel better?

"Ssshh..." He shut you up by kissing you once more. One moment he's peppering kisses all over your face and neck, the next he was yanking off your shorts.

He trailed his long fingers on your underwear. He wetted his lip salaciously upon realizing you're wearing a lace panties.

Fuck. Fuck. He'd give up anything just to see you right now. He imagined the look on your face as he removed your soaked underwear, spreading your legs right after.

Jungkook grabbed your right foot, kissing your sole, your calves—all the way to your inner thigh.

"Oh," your pussy clenched, desperate for something, anything.

"Am I doing good, noona?" Jungkook asked innocently, his upper lip twitching as he dipped his head on your thigh, kissing it more.

You hummed, wriggling until his face hit your center. Jungkook growled as he pulled your other feet, settling it over his shoulder. His hands dug into your hips to keep you in your place. You're squirming too much.

"Patience, baby..." He chuckled, struggling to steady you. He realized you wouldn't stop until you got what you wanted, so Jungkook dove in, moaning loud when his lips brushed against your cunt.

"Jung—Kook...I need you to oh!" You gripped the sheets again when without a warning, Jungkook ran his tongue through your parted folds.

"Sweet." Jungkook's lips twitched when your arousal coated his tongue.

"Shit...so good," tears brimmed in your eyes as Jungkook sucked on your clit.

"Relax, jagiya. I'm not going to hurt you." He cooed and pushed his tongue in and out of your pussy.

Your head tingled with foreign sensation. You gasped and screamed just as Jungkook added a finger in your hole. He pumped and curled it with the same rhythm of his tongue.

"Jungkook..." You cried, body convulsing. Your husband hummed. "F-Fingers. I need more."

You were so riled up. You took off your top so you could play with your breasts.

"Anything you want..." He followed your request. Jungkook didn't stop pumping and licking and sucking until you saw stars.

He was so obedient, tending to your needs like a good boy. Your heart swelled with both pain, lust, and envy.

Was he like this to his original wife? Did he follow whatever she wanted? Did she get to stare at his eyes as he swirled his tongue on her clit?

Fuck. The thought was enough to make your head spin.

You wanted that too. You wanted Jungkook to look at you with desire. You wanted him to be a good boy. All for you.

"Jungkook." You cried as you rocked your hips. Your stomach clenched, body flushed and full of sweat. "Don't stop please. I'm so close."

"Do it." He purred, slapping your clit before rubbing circles on it. His tongue continued to make wonders in your hole. "Shit. Yes, baby. That's right. Do it. Cum on my fingers." Jungkook kept patting your convulsing pussy, every tap caused you to squirt.

"Jungkook. I—I can't." You pushed his hand weakly.

"You can take more, jagiya." Jungkook rolled onto his back, hastily taking off his sweatpants and then he tugged you on top of him. You yelped with how quick he moved.

"You will ride my thigh, baby..." He leaned forward, cupping your face and murmuring this. You just came but you already felt heat building in your stomach.

He said those words as if he could read your mind.

"Go on." He demanded, digging his fingers into your waist and urging you to grind on his thigh.

You whimpered and gave it. Shit. Jungkook was so hot. He dipped his head to your chest, taking your nipple on his mouth while his hand palmed your other breast.

"Jungkook, oh my, God!" You couldn't stop whimpering as you rubbed your cunt against his muscular thigh. You cast your gaze on his hard cock, it was pressed on his stomach.

The tip of his dick was red, slit leaking with precum. It twitched, like it was begging to be touched...to be sucked.

Your mouth watered at the sight of it, unable to stop yourself from taking his cock in both of your hands, giving it few pumps.

Jungkook hissed at your touch. He sucked on your nipple harder.

"Fuck. Yes..." He licked your neck—"Use my thigh to make you cum, jagiya,"—and sucked bruises there.

You whimpered as you pulled his mouth back to yours for a rough kiss. You pumped his cock up and down, eliciting a deep growl from him.

"Mmph...I missed having you like this..." He confessed. Sooyoung always said she liked riding his thigh. Jungkook too. The feeling of her wet cunt on his skin was pure ecstasy.

"You're dripping all over me." Jungkook grunted while kissing your neck, his fingers found its way to your clit, encouraging you to come as he chased his high too.

You did nothing but to rub yourself against his thigh as you pumped his dick and massaged his balls. You wanted to take him in your mouth, but Jungkook was already coming, his abs clenched and you felt him spill his hot cum in your hands.

"Shit...Shit..." He rubbed your circles on your clit with so much ferocity, afraid to leave you chasing pleasure on your own.

It did the trick. You came on his thigh while you're busy sucking your fingers. You wondered what Jungkook's eyes would look if he saw you doing this.

Would his gaze darkened? Would he look at you with doe eyes and blushing cheeks?

"You feel better?" Your thoughts were halted when Jungkook spoke. He kissed you, smirking when he tasted him on your mouth. He slapped your ass.

"Jungkook!" You scolded him but he only laughed.

"What? You know you like it." He teased and kissed your mouth again.

You responded; however you slightly pushed his chest away before he could deepen the kiss.

Heat was traveling all over your body. Again.

"Kookie...we can't. I've come twice. I'll pass out if we go again."

Jungkook pouted but he relented. You got off his lap, wincing when you felt something leaking in your thighs.

"Ugh, I need to shower. " You snorted. "You too. We're filthy." And sticky with cum.

"Let's shower together?"

"No." You answered at once. You just wanted to tease him.

"Then I lost interest." Like a child, Jungkook collapsed on bed and kicked his feet.

"Get up you filthy boy!" You chuckled as you tried to pull his hands. Jungkook groaned, mirroring your action.

He was stronger than you so he managed to pull you to bed.

"Jungkook! Let me go!" You pried your arm out of his grasp but Jungkook only tightened his embrace to you. He even caged your legs with his thighs.

"Let's stay here for a while, jagiya. Let me cuddle you..."

And there it goes again—Jungkook's ability to coax you in doing what he desired. It sucked that you couldn't resist him.

You allowed him to hug you and to caress the top of your head lovingly. He also planted soft kisses on your ear and jawline.

Jungkook started humming, causing your eyes to flutter closed.

You were sleepy.

He was too. You heard him yawn. After that, he murmured something that was loud and clear in your head, a scream that shattered your fragile heart and its sharp pieces pierced through your whole body.

"I love you, Sooyoung..."

You didn't fall asleep.

You weren't able to fall asleep, but Jungkook did. Once you're sure he was cozy enough, you gently lifted his arm that was draped over your stomach.

You needed to get away from here.

You ran to the bathroom, locking it at once in case Jungkook woke up. You also opened the faucet to conceal your already silent whimpers.

Disgust.

The harrowing feeling in the pit of your stomach was back. The voice was still nowhere to be found which if you're being honest, was a big relief.

How were you supposed to get up and continue to live if the voice was here to remind you that you fucked up? Big time? That you weren't different from Jungkook's wife?

The Jeons said they hated Sooyoung because she was a gold-digging bitch. Were you different though? You agreed to do this for money too, and now you're using Jungkook for your sick pleasure too.

They're right.

You're nothing like Sooyoung.

Because you're so much worse.

You stared hard at your reflection in the mirror.

Tears cascaded down your cheeks.

You didn't notice the person staring right back at you.

You didn't know if she's still you.

You had to pull yourself together before you lost yourself here.

"This won't happen again." You told her. You told this to the person staring right back at you, hoping you could control her. After all, she's still you, right?

The woman in the mirror wasn't you.

She was uncontrollable. She didn't listen.

It happened again.

"Jungkook," your voice was unrecognizable. Were you scolding him or were you encouraging him to continue?

You and Jungkook were currently swimming in the pool here at the Jeon estate. It was just the two of you here, no helpers in sight. Maybe this was the reason why Jungkook was riled up.

He untied the strings of your bikini top, kneading your breast while smiling playfully. He shushed you when you tried to swat his hands away.

"You'll like this, jagiya." He wrapped his hand around your waist, pulling you closer on the side of the pool, the one near the return jet.

You gasped when he turned you around, your cunt feeling the high pressure of the water coming from the return jet.

"I'll help you cum so hard." He whispered as he showered kisses all over you exposed back, his hands reaching around to squeeze your tits. You liked how he rolled your nipples between his fingers.

Jungkook bit your shoulder when you started rubbing your ass against his hard cock.

You wanted to make him feel good too. You realized he always made sure to satiate you first. It had always been like this.

One time you two were in the kitchen to bake some cupcakes. Jungkook ate you out while you were leaning against the kitchen counter. He wasn't even bothered that his cock was left untouched. He came in his pants again though.

You also learned he was good at giving massages. You were sore from doing all of his laundry three days ago. Jungkook was very sensitive to smell. He didn't like the way their maids washed his clothes so he begged you to help him do the laundry. Jungkook told you specific steps on how to wash his clothes.

It took you hours to finish the laundry because he had a lot of dirty clothes. Jungkook was high-maintenance. He changed his clothes from time to time. Sweat bothered him so much, but going back, since you were exhausted, he offered to help your sore muscles through erotic massage and cunnilings.

You ended falling asleep after coming twice. Again, Jungkook's cock was left untouched.

There's also this one time when you were enjoying a peaceful dinner with the Jeons. Jungkook was sitting beside you and you could tell he was bored. He didn't want to hear his sisters talking about business anymore.

You discreetly pinched the side of his stomach when he started sighing loudly, hinting that he wanted to leave the table already.

"Behave." You remembered telling him. Jungkook only pouted his lips. A smile bloomed on your face when he followed your order. He even tried to engage in the conversation, but after a few minutes, he felt boredom tapping his shoulders.

Jungkook decided to play around, his hand finding its way to your thigh. You stifled a gasp, subtly asking him what he thought he was doing.

Jungkook shrugged as he ate his glazed donut. His other hand was busy digging on the soft flesh of your thighs, fingers trailing your heat.

"So wet," he whispered as he pushed your underwear to the side.

Jungkook ended up finger fucking you under the table that night. You couldn't do anything aside from faking a smile and wishing they hadn't noticed when with a few pumps, you came hard on Jungkook's fingers.

"Delicious." He shamelessly licked his cum coated finger in front of his family, pretending as if your arousal was the sugar icing of his glazed donut.

Ugh.

Damn Jeon Jungkook.

If there's one thing better than Jungkook making you cum, you could say it's when you two lay in bed at night.

Gone were the days you slept on separate beds. You had done freakier things with Jungkook to still be uncomfortable with the idea of sleeping by his side.

Fortunately, Jungkook didn't try to seduce you at night. He was already content holding you in his arms. He liked it when you rested your head against his chest while he repeatedly kissed your head.

"Alright, jagiya. What do you wanna learn about me tonight?" Jungkook suppressed his yawn.

He got tired swimming all day that all he wanted to do now was sleep. He didn't want to break his promise to you though. Weeks ago, you two made a deal to talk about random things about yourselves.

You wanted to get to know Jungkook. He felt the same way too. It was because you found out that Sooyoung never really shared her personal life with her husband. She also didn't try to learn more about Jungkook's personality. All she wanted from him was money.

"Hmm," you traced lazy circles on his chest. Jungkook was so warm. "Did you always want to be a pianist?"

"No."

His response surprised you.

"I like music, that's for sure, but I only tried playing that organ when Jinjoo-noona told me she likes boys who play the piano. You see, I really like my sisters. They treat me so well, you know? Jang-mi-noona too. She always gave me sweet snacks when I was younger."

Your heart swelled with adoration upon learning this story. You imagined Jungkook doing his best just to make his siblings proud.

"My tutors said I have a good future in the music industry. They call me a prodigy..." He trailed off, embarrassed to repeat the compliments made by his teachers. "I guess it got in my head a little so I said...why not try it? I can't think about anything I want to do yet so I figured it's best to follow what the grown ups say. They're supposed to know everything, right?"

Of course almost everyone believed that. What they didn't know was that adults were just like children too. They experienced new things every day. They were suddenly thrown into the real word even without their consent.

Adults had it worse than children actually. At least kids had adults to look after them, to do things for them when they found it too hard. But the adults? They didn't have anyone. They were expected to succeed all the time, a wrong move could cost them their lives.

"But I got tired of it. I realize I only like playing piano in my free time. I didn't want it to be my career. I didn't want it to define me." He sighed. "I didn't want it to become a chore."

Because playing piano was Jungkook's outlet, his escape from reality. Every time he hit the key, he felt like he was in another world. But if he chose to perform because people wanted it, then he would be forced to live in their world. He would be pressured to live in reality. His escape wouldn't be an escape anymore. He would be burdened now that people had expectations he needed to live up to.

Jungkook didn't want that.

That's the reason why he quit. His mother was wrong. He gave up because he wanted to and not because of Sooyoung.

"It's only a chore if you think it that way. You're responsible for your thoughts, Kookie. An unpleasant thing for others may be pleasant to you. It's just a matter of perspective. I hope you don't hinder yourself from doing something you love simply because you have doubts."

Jungkook's lips twitched.

"I really don't understand why you suddenly become so wise," he laughed as he kissed you on the cheeks. "What about you, Sooyoung-ah? What's your dream?"

"I want to open my own bar."

Jungkook visibly tensed at that. He didn't say anything at first though. He just moved closer to you, almost squeezing you in his chest, like he was afraid you'd get away.

And then he nuzzled your cheeks affectionately.

"Why? You miss performing, jagiya?" He must be talking about Sooyoung's job. Did he think you wanted to open a bar so 'you' could continue strip dancing and pleasuring different men at the end of the night?

"No, Kookie. All I want is to perform in front you." You tilted your head so that you could welcome his mouth.

Jungkook moaned between the kisses. He grabbed both of your cheeks to deepen the intimate act. He craved you. He would always crave you.

"So be a good boy and get better, okay? You have to see again. You still need to watch me perform for you..."

Time passed by. You weren't sure how long you had been pretending to be Jungkook's wife. All you knew was that you were starting to forget this was all an act.

You didn't hesitate to look back whenever someone called you by the name Sooyoung. You also didn't stop Jungkook whenever he touched your body as if it belonged to him.

"We have good news for you!" Mrs. Jeon's eyes twinkled one afternoon.

You were having lunch with the Jeons which was nothing new, except that Jungkook's father was here too.

Jang-mi and Jinjoo seemed excited as well. They looked like they were bubbles threatening to burst.

"What's the good news, eomma?" Jungkook asked nonchalantly as he stuffed his mouth with food.

You immediately wiped the remnant of kimchi sauce on the side of his lips. Jungkook kissed you in return.

He was comfortable showering you with affection in front of his family. He wasn't like this months ago though. Jungkook didn't even want the two of you to eat with his family before, but now he realized that the Jeons were fond of you. He felt like they loved you more than they loved him.

He couldn't blame his family though. You were easy to love—easier than the first time he met you at the club. Jungkook wasn't sure what triggered the change but he most certainly loved post-accident Sooyoung more.

"Your eye surgery has been confirmed, Jungkookie. You can have your vision back soon!"

You weren't sure how many times you hoped to hear these words before. If you remembered it correctly, you wished almost a hundred times a day for this very moment to happen. You imagined dancing around like you won the lottery because technically, you did.

You could finally have your blank check and leave Jeon Jungkook; however, now that it's happening, you felt like you had been robbed—it was as though the money you won from the lottery suddenly vanished, leaving you with unlimited liabilities.

You felt like you had to abscond in order to save yourself from your sins.

It's funny because that's exactly what you were supposed to do soon. You had to leave Jungkook and never come back.

You caused him so much pain and he'd know this soon.

You were damned.

As it turned out, you weren't the only one who was thrilled to know that Jungkook's surgery was happening soon.

Apparently, Jungkook didn't want to go to surgery too.

"Your hair is getting longer, Kookie." You said while brushing his hair with your fingers. It's the middle of the night. As usual, you two were cuddling on the same bed. The only difference from the other nights was that this time, you were the one stroking his hair and kissing him on the head.

You weren't sure why Jungkook was lonely. He barely talked the whole day. Maybe it had something to with the surgery? His mood changed right after hearing his mother's 'good news.'

"Braid my hair?" Jungkook asked softly.

You gave him a wild look.

"It's two in the morning, Jungkook."

"So?" His pouted lips indicated that he didn't care about time. All he wanted was for you to play with his hair. It was very soothing.

"Fine." You told him to sit on the accent chair. You grabbed your hairbrush and went behind the chair. Jungkook wrapped his hands around your wrist though.

"Sit on my lap, jagiya."

You groaned at his request.

"I thought you wanted me to braid your hair?"

"I do. But I want you to do it while sitting on my lap..." He patted his thigh.

You sighed, relenting.

"Don't expect this to look good. I can't properly braid your hair in this position."

Jungkook just hummed. His eyes fluttered shut when you started brushing his soft locks.

"Damn it. It's hard!" You complained when you found it hard to braid his hair in this posture. You changed position by straddling his lap. "Don't you get hard, Jeon."

You said when you felt his dick hitting your center.

He responded by burying his face in your neck. You were kidding. This was the first time he didn't react to your jokes.

He must be really sad.

You decided to just braid his hair. You weren't going to force him to share what he felt because who knew? Maybe he himself wasn't sure what he felt.

But you were wrong. Jungkook was certain about his feelings.

"I don't want to undergo surgery."

You dropped your hairbrush. You bit your lip too, your hands balled into a fist.

What did he just say?

"Don't be stubborn, Jungkook." You gritted your teeth.

Who would have thought you'd have this reaction? You couldn't lie. You were disappointed too when Mrs. Jeon said Jungkook could have his vision back soon. However it's only because you didn't want to leave yet.

Now that you're hearing Jungkook say that he didn't want to get better, you realized you two didn't really share the same feeling.

You wanted him to get better, even if it meant you had to leave and hurt him. This was for his own good. You were temporary in his life.

You weren't the girl who made a vow to stay with him always and forever.

You were a fraudster—taking this in mind, you realized you had to convince Jungkook to push through the eye surgery.

You got off his lap. Jungkook grabbed your wrist before you could take another step away from him.

"But what if you leave me?" You saw different emotions coming from Jungkook: anger, frustration, desolation, and loneliness.

But never fear.

It wasn't like Jungkook wasn't scared. He was. He was frightened almost all the time, but the fear he was showing now was different.

It's the kind of fear that would break him beyond repair. Jungkook didn't know if he could survive life without you by his side.

"Don't be silly. W-Why would I leave?" Your heart was hammering through your chest.

Did Jungkook know? Did he know you were pretending to be his wife?

The answer was no. He was oblivious about your plan, regrettably what he believed the reason why you'd leave was more shocking than him knowing the truth.

"Because you will no longer pity me!" The frustration he felt was back. Tears immediately filled Jungkook's eyes. He was gripping your hand with the same force he used the first time he woke up after being in a coma for weeks.

Jungkook's chest heaved. He was shivering all over, even his teeth chattered.

You realized he was hyperventilating. He was so scared. The fight that happened inside his car which led to the accident was coming back to him.

He could taste the anxiety in his mouth when Sooyoung claimed she'd divorce him. Jungkook remembered how his wife unfastened her seat belt, like she was willing to jump out of the door just to get away from him—all of these frightened the hell out of him.

You didn't know what else to do but to hug him.

"Jungkook...stop..." Your embrace tightened. You were basically squishing him in your chest. You would do anything to make him believe you're not going anywhere. This situation was frustrating him. He was probably stumbling in the dark thinking that his wife wasn't going to guide him through the light.

"I'm not going to leave you, my Jungkookie. I'm always here." You cupped both of his cheeks before nuzzling them.

And then you said your last straw.

"I love you, Jungkook...."

He stopped trembling right away.

I love you.

You didn't think it would be so easy to utter these three words. Was it because you were good at lying? Or was it because you were being honest when you expressed your feelings?

You didn't want to think about it anymore. You were done questioning yourself. All you wanted to do now was appreciate Jungkook's response.

"I love you too."

I love you too. He said this while emphasizing the word you. This was the first time he said these three words without attaching Sooyoung's name.

For a moment, you felt like Jungkook was confessing to you and not to his late wife.

It felt so good you were certain you're gonna treasure this moment forever.

You thought you'd have to shed blood, sweat, and tears just to convince Jungkook to undergo surgery, fortunately telling him that you loved him already did the trick.

You wondered how many times Sooyoung had said those words to him. Jungkook looked taken aback when you confessed. Maybe his real wife wasn't that expressive?

"Don't put anything near your eyes, Kookie." You reminded him while helping him brush his hair.

Jungkook just finished taking a bath. You were helping him groom himself. This was a special day, as in the day when he'd finally push through the surgery.

"Not even eye cream? I didn't get to sleep last night. What if I look like shit?" He pouted while you chuckled.

"You're perfect, pretty boy," and then you gave him a peck on the lips. Jungkook tried to deepen the kiss, making you giggle.

"Stop. We'll be late." You playfully shoved his chest. Jungkook grumbled but didn't say anything.

The Jeons were already waiting for you and Jungkook when you stepped out of the bedroom.

"Ready?" Mrs. Jeon smiled, though it's forced. You could tell she's nervous.

"Yes, eomeoni." You grinned back hoping it would somehow calm her down. You wanted to assure her you wouldn't leave until Jungkook's in the hospital.

There's no need for you to stay and wait for the surgery to finish. The doctors guaranteed it would be successful. As it should. The Jeon paid a large sum of money for this.

"Perfect. Let's go!" Mrs. Jeon instructed the helpers and drivers to move.

You assisted Jungkook in getting into the car. He specifically requested to be in the same vehicle as you. He also said he didn't want any other people, except the driver, to ride with you two.

"Good?" You fondled the back of Jungkook's hand.

He's so quiet and instead of answering, he simply squeezed your hand and rested his head on your shoulder.

You swore you could feel his heart beating.

"You're nervous?"

Jungkook groaned in response.

You kissed the side of his head and then you asked him if he wanted you to sing. Jungkook loved your voice so much. It instantly calmed him down.

"Okay, baby." You kissed his temple again before humming. The song stuck in your mind was Kiss Me by Ed Sheeran. It had a soft melody that helped someone feel at ease.

"Settle down with me, cover me up, cuddle me in. Lie down with me, yeah ~ and hold me in your arms..."

You couldn't help but smile. The nights you spent cuddled with Jungkook flashed in your mind.

Oh, how fast the night changed. Before, you didn't want Jungkook anywhere near you. He scared you, he made you feel like he was going to hurt everyone around him.

"And your heart's against my chest. Your lips pressed to my neck..."

This was your favorite position. Nothing would top the feeling of being able to feel Jungkook's heart beat.

You thought some people were exaggerating when they said they could spend their life listening to the heartbeat of the people they loved.

You understood them now. Jungkook's heartbeat provided you comfort. It was a constant reminder that he was capable of loving, and that he was alive—he was real and he was going to stay with you, even if it was just for a short while.

"I'm falling for your eyes, but they don't know me yet..." Your voice almost cracked but you held it in.

You inhaled sharply. I'm falling for your eyes, but they will never know me. This was how it should be.

No word 'yet,' because you would never be given a chance to see Jungkook again after this.

"And with a feeling I'll forget. I'm in love now..."

You had to forget him. You had to run very, very far away from him.

"Kiss me like you wanna be loved. This feels like falling in love..."

You had never kissed someone the way you kissed Jungkook. With others, you sought comfort. With Jungkook, you strived to be the comfort.

Lies. You were not the embodiment of comfort. You were the personification of despair and betrayal.

"Settle down with me and I'll be your safety...you'll be my lady ~"

Jungkook swore he'd change for you. He would no longer act just to save face. He'd beg his parents to write his name in the will again if that's going to make you happy.

He'd be your safety. You'd never go astray as long as he was alive.

"I was made to keep your body warm, but I'm cold as the wind blows so hold me in your arms..."

But for now, he'd ask you to keep him safe. He was cold, he was stuck in a very dark place. He needed you to light him up and keep him warm.

He didn't need to ask. You would do that. Anything for your sweet Jeon Jungkook.

You continued singing while holding him in your arms. He looked so small like this, like a boy who needed love.

He needed love.

He wanted to be loved by you.

You wanted to give him love too, so after you sang the last verse of the song, you smiled and nuzzled his cheeks...

And then you kissed both of his eyes.

The medical workers assisted Jungkook the second the car stopped in front of the hospital building.

"What about you, Sooyoung-ah?" Jungkook asked when he realized you were still inside the car. He didn't feel you move.

"I'll follow you in a while, Kookie. I just need a moment..."

Jungkook furrowed his brow, but instead of questioning you, he just sighed.

You smiled sadly.

"It's going to be okay, Jungkook-ah. I promise I'll be the first person you'd see after the surgery."

Jungkook couldn't help it. A smile bloomed on his face.

"Okay. I love you, noona."

"I love you too, my Kookie..."

Jungkook was escorted inside the hospital after that. You, on the other hand, immediately closed the door of the car.

You turned to the driver of the Jeons who was already looking at you.

"Where should I drop you, Mam?"

You smiled at the driver.

"Anywhere. Just make sure it's very far away from here."

A low moan escaped her mouth as she arched her back, welcoming the pleasure of his cock teasing her entrance.

"Call me, Kookie." He demanded, lips dangerously close to her mouth. He wanted to hear her say his name first.

"W-What?" The woman seemed lost. She cried when he slapped her ass cheek. It hurt, but it felt good.

She wanted him to do it again.

"Say it." He repeated, this time his voice was colder as he dragged the tip of his cock through her wet folds.

"Kookie..." The girl mewled. She would do anything he wanted as long as he didn't stop pleasuring her.

But he stopped.

He stopped just when she was about to reach her high.

"What the fuck—"

"Get out." He pulled away from her.

The girl gasped. She's about to say something but he beat her to it.

"You're not her. I don't want to see your face. Get out."

The girl was too stunned to speak so she just let out a huff, glaring at him as she immediately straightened her dress.

"You're a fucking asshole, Jungkook." And then she left.

Everybody left.

What was wrong about him and why did everyone leave? Was it because that girl was right? Was he really an asshole?

"But she's not her." Jungkook muttered under his breath, trying to silence the voice in his head telling him he fucked up.

He fucked up the good thing he had with that girl just because she's not you.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me." The growl Taehyung let out didn't even make Jungkook flinch.

He had done far more embarrassing things than banged Taehyung's door in the middle of the night.

"My head hurts, hyung." Jungkook groaned as he made his way to the couch. He didn't have to wait for the older boy to let him in. He just knew he was always welcome here.

"You can't just barge in here at three fucking am, Jeon." Or maybe not. Needless to say, Jungkook didn't care. Taehyung owed him one.

"You owe me one, Kim." And he never failed to remind Taehyung this.

"I owe you one?" The owner of the house scoffed. He was sneering as if Jungkook's presence was a big burden, but then he proceeded to make hot cocoa for the 'intruder.' Taehyung also grabbed ibuprofen in his medicine cabinet.

He handed the cocoa and the pill to Jungkook.

"Drink up, you idiot." Taehyung let out an exhale as he plopped down beside the younger boy.

"You reek alcohol and..." Taehyung sniffed Jungkook's neck. "Girls. I can smell different perfumes on you. Damn, how many girls did you fuck?"

It was a good question. Jungkook tried to remember, sadly he couldn't. He shrugged, as if he didn't care.

"Doesn't matter. They're not her."

Taehyung sucked in a deep breath after Jungkook said those words. He really lost it, huh?

"Of course they're not her. It's been five years, Kook. When will you realize she doesn't want to be found?"

"I will never stop looking for her. She owes me too." Jungkook tightened his hold on the cup of cocoa. However, the determination he felt was shattered when Taehyung spoke again.

"Why do you keep insisting people owe you something? Haven't you learned anything in five years, huh, Jungkookie?"

Jungkookie. What a fucking lame way to call him. It reminded him of the way you utter his nickname: Kookie.

He hated it. He hated you so much. How was it possible for you to still occupy his thoughts even though it had been five years since you left?

Five years since his eye surgery.

Five years since he started seeing again.

Five years since he found out Sooyoung died.

Five years since he came to know about his family's cruel plan.

Five years since the Jeons revealed you're nothing but a fraud.

Five years since you left.

You left.

You left after telling him you'd never leave. You were a liar. A user. A manipulator. You tricked him and he was too naïve to realize it.

"I have. And it's to confront people who owe me."

Taehyung scoffed again. He couldn't help it. Jungkook was being petty.

"So is that why you're here? You want to confront me? You want to know why I didn't describe her face?" Taehyung shook his head. "Is it my fault I don't remember? How many times do I have to tell you we only saw her once—"

"I don't care! You should try harder!" Jungkook was raging when he turned to his best friend. His eyes were bloodshot that Taehyung couldn't help but swallow thickly.

Jungkook looked so miserable without you.

"That's all I'm asking, hyung. To try harder! You know how desperate I am!"

Jungkook's scream reminded Taehyung about what happened five years ago. It was very similar to this. He remembered Jungkook barging in his home in the middle of the night; his face was pale, eyes dilated as if he'd lose something important if he blinked.

"Hyung! You have to help me!" Eighteen year-old Jungkook begged. He was clutching a sketchbook in his chest.

"Jungkook, what's happening? Calm down..." Taehyung tried to comfort the younger boy. He wasn't an expert or something, but he felt like getting stressed would affect Jungkook's healing process. His eye surgery was successful; however it didn't mean his life was already back to normal. He still needed to be careful. He needed to manage his stress level, especially because it hadn't even been a week since the surgery.

"I-I can’t. I went to Jimin-hyung but he can't help me. You're my only hope, hyung!" Jungkook was staring at his best friend using those doe eyes, the asset which was very hard to resist. No one was immune to this, not even Taehyung.

"Tell me how I can help you, Kook."

It was the wrong thing to say. Jungkook became more riled up. He clumsily sat on the couch as he opened his sketchbook.

"You met her, right? You met the girl who pretended to be my wife. You..." Jungkook's lips quivered. He was slurring because he was speaking too fast.

It broke Taehyung's heart to see him like this. Jungkook was restless. The bags under his eyes were getting darker. He lost weight in a span of days.

This was bad.

"You have to describe to me how she looks, hyung. I-I will draw her face. I'm good at it, you know? I...I can draw! Please. Please...I really need to see her."

"Jungkook—" Taehyung's voice drowned when Jungkook spoke frantically.

"Let's start with something easy, okay? What's the color of her eyes? What about its shape? Almond? Upturned? Small? Speak up, hyung. Lips! Does she have thin lips? Thick? Nose? Her lips? Her eyes? Almond?"

Taehyung stopped listening to Jungkook. He kept repeating the same thing. It's obvious he wasn't in the right state of mind. He was so desperate to the point that he looked pathetic. Who were you and what did you do to Jungkook?

Why did he become like this?

"I'm sorry, Kook. I really can't remember her face. I only met her once because you basically pushed us away from her." Jungkook used to be so immature. He felt jealousy consuming him whenever you talked to his friends and male caregivers.

"Try harder. Please! I have to see her." Jungkook cried the same thing over and over again.

Taehyung repeatedly shook his head too.

"I can't help you, Jungkookie. What about your family? They see her all the time before."

Jungkook threw his pencil away because of the frustration he felt at Taehyung's suggestion.

"You think I didn't ask them?" It was stupid. Taehyung was stupid. Of course Jungkook begged his family to tell him the truth about you; unfortunately they kept their mouth shut. Besides, Jungkook wasn't sure if he could trust the information his family would give him. They fooled him before, what's stopping them from doing it again?

He remembered begging them to tell him your name though.

"I'm sorry, Jungkook-ah. We don't know her real name too." Jinjoo was remorseful.

Jungkook hated her. He couldn't believe he used to adore his sister. They're all liars. How could they not know your name? They were the ones who hired you.

Jungkook was so desperate he didn't believe his sisters. He tried asking their helpers and his other caregivers about you; regrettably it looked like they were paid to shut up.

Jungkook went as far as demanding a CCTV copy of the day you and him went to Lotte World, hoping he could at least see your face even on that small screen. Unfortunately, just like the caregivers and other helpers, they were paid by the Jeons too.

Or was it you? Did you use the blank check the Jeons gave you to silence those people? Yes, he knew about the deal you made with his family. Jungkook was feral. He demanded to know about the reason for your pretense. Mrs. Jeon told her son the truth. She told him everything except any information that would reveal your identity.

Everyone was protecting you, even Taehyung and Jimin and it's breaking his heart. Why did you want to get away from him? Didn't he treat you right? Didn't you feel anything for him? Was everything that you two had done meant nothing to you?

It's unfair.

Jungkook's heart recoiled every time he thought about those moments. You weren't his real wife but what he felt for you during those moments were real.

It's real.

It's real and he wanted to be able to look into your eyes and ask if it's real for you too.

Jungkook swore he would never give up looking for you. He would do anything just to see you again, even if it meant flipping the world upside down, even if it meant stringing along women who sounded like you—because even though five years had passed, all he could think about was you and the way you kissed his eyes.

Jungkook woke up to the sound of his phone ringing.

"Shit." He grumbled, hands automatically massaging his aching neck. He wanted to open his eyes, but the blinding light was making it difficult to do so.

The blinding light was none other than the sun, which he didn't understand. The curtains in his room were always close. Who the fuck drew it open today?

"Fucking shut up already." Jungkook let a roar while fumbling his phone out of the pocket of his jeans. He immediately pressed the blinking screen to listen to his voicemail.

"Good morning, Mr. Jeon. It's detective Jung Hoseok. I take it you're still asleep? Please call me back once you receive this message. I have new information about your Jane Doe."

Hoseok's voice was what forced Jungkook to peel his eyes open. This was also the time when he realized he wasn't in his apartment. He was slouching on the couch in Taehyung's living room. Ah. This was why his neck was stiff. He was in a very awkward position for hours.

"Also, please stop threatening to kill my subordinates. We take threats very seriously in this job. Call me back when this message reaches you. Have a great day, Mr. Jeon."

The voice message ended after that. Jungkook gritted his teeth. It was early in the morning but he's already annoyed. He told Hoseok to stop calling you Jane Doe.

It made him feel like you were dead. He's pretty sure you're not. Your whereabouts were just unknown—this was also the reason why Jungkook hired Jung Hoseok. He was said to be the best detective when it came to finding a lost person.

It's been five years since Jungkook hired him, unfortunately he still hadn't found you. It made Jungkook irritable, leading him to threaten the people working for Hoseok. They're all useless. Why couldn't they find you?

Admittedly, the answer was simple. Hoseok and his team were looking for you across the globe. There was a possibility that you left Korea after getting your blank check.

But where exactly did you go?

Maybe Jungkook could ask Hoseok. He said he had new information about you, right?

"Let's meet in our usual meeting place. Be there in ten minutes." Jungkook also sent a voice message to the detective.

He sighed, hoping this was the day he'd finally see you.

Jungkook was pissed and Hoseok was the culprit.

"Why are you the one deciding where and when we should fucking meet, huh?" Jungkook was spitting fire. He told the detective he wanted to meet up in ten minutes; however, Hoseok said he would only meet Jungkook at exactly eleven pm tonight. He also changed the location of their meeting.

Hoseok wanted to meet up in a bar somewhere in the unprogressive part of Seoul. The idea made Jungkook scoff. There were many high-end bars located in Itaewon. Why would the detective choose a cheap bar?

"Fucking Jung Hoseok." Jungkook gritted his teeth as he removed his helmet. He shook his head, causing his mint locks to become messy.

Jungkook was driving a motorcycle. He tried to avoid using other vehicles after his surgery, especially cars. He hated cars because it only reminded him of the two women he lost.

Fucking cars.

"Where the fuck are you, Jung? I can't fucking leave my bike here." Jungkook hissed, profanities escaped his mouth as he sent another voice message to the detective. Why wasn't he answering Jungkook's call? It's already 11:05pm.

Jungkook couldn't decide whether to leave his bike in this shitty parking space and search every bar in this shitty neighborhood or to stay and just wait for the detective's call. Hoseok didn't mention the name of the bar where he planned to meet Jungkook.

What a scumbag. He's full of shit. Jungkook was annoyed. He felt like he's wasting his money on Hoseok.

"Fuck it." He cussed again before deciding to leave his bike in the dark. Who cared? Jungkook realized he didn't care if someone stole it. All he could think about right now was the information Hoseok had managed to gather. This inspired him to roam around the neighborhood, though he couldn't help but roll his eyes as he jumped from one bar to another. Every place was empty. Jungkook wondered why these people decided to conduct their business in this neighborhood. It was obvious that customers flocked at Itaewon. Who would even want to go here? This place was similar to a pigsty.

"What can I get you, pretty boy?"

Jungkook flinched when an old woman suddenly touched his shoulder. She smiled at him, stretching her lips wider, unfortunately it still failed to straighten the crease on her forehead.

She must be really old.

"Uh..." Jungkook looked around. Hoseok wasn't here. "I'm just looking around. Sorry, I'll leave—ouch! What the fuck—"

Jungkook yelped in pain when the woman unexpectedly hit his shoulder. She was old yet her hand was still heavy, like it was made of metal.

"Aigoo! You're a bad luck! You dared to enter my shop and just leave without buying anything? You're supposed to be my first customer! You ruined my luck tonight!" The older woman kept on hitting Jungkook. She struck his arms, his chest, and the back of his head.

"Ah, stop it!" Jungkook covered his face. "Fine! Fine! I'll order everything on the menu! Just stop hitting me!"

The old woman complied at once. Her big smile was back, eyes twinkling.

What the hell.

"Good, good! Now sit down like a good boy and I'll prepare your food!"

Jungkook didn't have a choice but to do what the woman said.

Damn it.

Jungkook didn't know it but you worked right across the bar where he's currently at. It's the same place where Hoseok wanted to meet him.

Jungkook wished to see you tonight and Hoseok's going to make sure that would happen.

"Let me guess..." You flashed Hoseok a big grin as you raised your brow. "One Moscow Mule, right?"

The detective grinned back at you as he nodded his head. His expression only caused you to smile wider.

You didn't know Hoseok's name but you already knew the drink he would order. It's the same thing every night. Hoseok discovered Déjà vu, the name of the bar where you worked, three weeks ago. Ever since that night, he never failed to go back to this place.

He swung by at eleven on the dot. Hoseok's actions were predictable. First, he would swiftly come in as he removed his hat. After that he would go straight to the bar counter, occupying the third spot of the bar stool. Customers rarely went to this bar so that spot was always available for Hoseok.

Once he's settled on his seat, Hoseok would flash you a charming smile and proceed to order his favorite drink: Moscow Mule. Tonight you beat him by saying it first.

Hoseok usually stayed for just ten minutes. He was always silent as he sipped on his drink, carefully scanning the whole place.

There were only five people in the bar and that included you and him already.

"Rough night at work?" You weren't sure what compelled you to start a conversation with Hoseok. Maybe it's his smile?

Hoseok always smiled brightly at you. He still did it tonight, but something didn't feel right. Tonight, his smile didn't reach his eyes.

"Yeah. My boss is being a butt." He snorted.

"Hm, all bosses are butts though."

"Yah! I heard that!" Seokjin, the bar owner, aka your boss, heard what you just said.

"Oh! Sajangnim! I didn't see you there." You faked a gasp, lying that you had no idea he was standing just a meter away from you. Seokjin was busy mixing drinks—his own drink.

Hoseok raised his brow in amusement. He had been visiting this bar for three weeks now but this was the first time he saw you interact with your boss. It was apparent that you had a good relationship with him.

"So what did you do that made your boss mad?"

Hoseok didn't realize he was spacing out until he felt Seokjin's breath fanning his cheek. Damn. Seokjin was leaning too close to him. It made Hoseok's cheeks turn red.

He was literally the most handsome man Hoseok had ever seen—this was coming from a man who had travelled the whole world. Shit.

"Ah! Why are you assuming he's the one at fault?" You pointed at Hoses' face.

Seokjin snorted.

"Because the boss is always right!"

Hoseok's lips twitched as he watched you bicker with your boss. He found it amusing and frankly, it made him wonder if you ever talked to Jungkook like this too.

Hoseok had known his boss for five years now; regrettably he hadn't seen Jungkook smile. Not even once. He was always scowling, as though he was angry at the world. Actually, he looked like he was carrying the world on his shoulders.

Except it's not his world. How could it be when his world was bickering with Seokjin right now?

"He's not really a butt, you know? My boss is just going through something." Hoseok interjected your conversation with your boss.

You turned to face Hoseok.

"Damn. You shouldn't have said that. I lost to him now!" You playfully pouted while glaring at Seokjin. The latter laughed it off, happy that he won.

Hoseok chuckled as well.

"Sorry. I just have to ready myself, you know...to kiss his ass. I'm meeting him tonight."

"Wait! Right now? As in...here?" You were shocked that you almost dropped the second glass of Hoseok's drink.

Was it weird that you suddenly felt nervous? His boss wasn't your boss, yet you felt like you're the one being reprimanded.

Your heart actually skipped a beat.

"Yeah—"

The bell rang, indicating that someone entered the bar.

You, Seokjin, and Hoseok all turned towards the door where Jungkook just emerged.

"That's him. That's my boss..." Hoseok switched his gaze back to you just so he could watch your reaction. He was expecting to see ‘surprise’ painting your face and honestly, you didn't disappoint.

You made the exact face Hoseok had been imagining. It's almost comically painful to see your eyes growing big. Your body froze though, like you suddenly became a mannequin. Hoseok wasn't sure if you were even breathing. He also didn't know that your stomach twisted in pain and fear.

"Jung Hoseok, you fucking asshole!"

Jungkook.

Jeon Jungkook was back.

Run. Unlike five years ago, the voice in your head was cooperating now, telling you to run for the hills before Jungkook saw you.

His attention was currently focused on Hoseok. Jungkook was fuming. His jaw ticked and for the very first time, you saw how his hooded eyes bore into you.

Into you.

His eyes bore into you.

Into you—Into you?

"Have we met before?"

You choked.

You literally choked on your spit when Jungkook spoke to you. You were so stunned to see him that you didn't realize when he looked at you. Weren't he just lashing out on Hoseok?

"Man, if you had a dollar every time someone uses that pick up line to you, you'd surely be rich by now." Seokjin was the one who answered Jungkook's question. Your boss shook his head like he was disappointed. This bar rarely had customers but when someone came, they always tried to hit on you—this was why Seokjin made sure to be around all the time. He was ready to butt in the moment he sensed a customer was making you uncomfortable.

He couldn't decipher the current situation though. Did you know Jungkook? Why were you rooted on your spot? Did something happen between the two of you before? Seokjin had many queries running inside head.

"I—I'm not..." Jungkook pursed his lips, brows knitting while explaining his side to your boss. "I know I haven't seen her before, but she seems..."

Your fake husband trailed off, not knowing how to complete his statement. What's the right word to use? Familiar?

"Jamais vu." Hoseok interrupted, supping his drink. "I believe that's the term you're looking for, Mr. Jeon."

Mr. Jeon. No doubt, he was really the same man you love—took advantage of before.

He was the same Jungkook who showed you love just because he thought you were his wife. Jamais Vu. Hoseok was right. Jungkook had literally never seen you, but you were familiar.

You were familiar because you had kissed him, touched him, and murmured sweet nothings to him as you chased your high.

It had been five years since you had seen him. Who would have thought you'd meet again like this?

"Well, what I think is that you're stupid if you've met her before and forgot about it. How could you? She's literally the best person in this world." Seokjin put his arms around you, as if he was protecting you. You two had known each other for years now. You wouldn't mind him doing this. You were comfortable around him.

Truthfully, you appreciated that he's doing this for you. You weren't really sure what to do right now. You were still frozen and scared to speak.

Would he remember my voice if I speak? You wondered, making your heart recoiled. Shit. No.

"Ah, so you know how to kiss butts too, huh?" Hoseok teased, still going at it with the joke. Seokjin didn't miss the way the detective watched your expression—it was like he's waiting for you to react in a certain way.

It's very different with the way Jungkook looked at you. Hoseok's boss stared at you like you were a damn puzzle he needed to solve. His gaze was both dark and sparkling though. Weird combination.

"You got me! But I can definitely do way more than that—" Seokjin turned you around, almost pushing you away from Hoseok and Jungkook's stare.

"—Mr. Jeon!" Your boss called Jungkook's attention in another attempt to stop him from eying you. He succeeded.

Barely.

"Looks like you had a rough night. Care for a drink? It's on the house..."

"Huh? Um—" Jungkook licked his lips, momentarily shifting his attention to Seokjin. "Drink? Yeah. I need one. Whatever you can make. I don't....have preference."

And then he was looking at you again.

Seokjin grinned.

"Perfect! I'll have your drink ready." Your boss smiled at Jungkook before turning to you. "You're free to take your break. You must be tired..."

You were not—at least not physically. Your shift just started, but you wouldn't mind taking a break.

You needed it. You needed to get out of here.

"Thanks, Sajangnim." You turned your back on Seokjin before he could reply, desperate to shake off the weird way your heart fluttered as Jungkook stared at you.

The night you met Jungkook again after five years, you decided to do what you're best at: running.

You listened to the voice inside your head that used to be annoying. In fairness, the voice wasn't urging you to do something stupid.

For once, it told you something you should have done in the first place.

You should have never agreed to the plans of the Jeons. You shouldn’t have pretended to be someone you were not because you see, five years had passed but you're still pining after Jungkook.

It's stupid and you knew it. You were an idiot for falling into the trap you made. You were an idiot for thinking that the affection Jungkook had shown you was for you.

Thinking about those sweet moments still left you teary-eyed. The longing you felt was so intense that sometimes you just wanted to rip your heart out.

This was one of those times.

Seeing Jungkook after five years made the hole in your heart deeper. You missed him so much. All you wanted to do was hug him and kiss him again.

But you couldn't.

You couldn't because things had changed. He changed. He was no longer the boy you could easily fool.

Jungkook grew up and he could see now.

You were afraid he could see through your lies so you had to leave. You told Seokjin you only needed a break for fifteen minutes, sadly thirty minutes had passed but your heart was still beating violently.

There was no way you could go back inside the bar while Jungkook was around.

No. You would never allow your paths to cross again. The guilt you felt was already heavy. You would surely stumble if you gave into the selfish part of you who wanted to be with him again.

No. You weren't going to repeat the same mistake before, not now that you were in control of the girl you saw in the mirror.

She was no longer weak for Jeon Jungkook.

"I guess you found out before I even had the chance to tell you, huh?" The corner of Hoseok's mouth twitched as he watched Jungkook watch you hurriedly leave the bar the second Seokjin said you could take a break.

"Is..." Jungkook slowly switched his gaze at the detective when he couldn't see you anymore. Where did you go? What did you do during your breaks? Did you smoke? Drink coffee? Meet up with someone?

Jungkook realized he knew absolutely nothing about you. Not even your name.

"Is she..." Jungkook repeated again. It's hard to get the words out of his mouth.

"She is." Hoseok understood it anyway. "She's the person you're looking for. She's the one who pretended to be your wife."

Jungkook's heart constricted, throat closing up.

He couldn't breathe.

"T-That's her...?" Jungkook's voice broke, eyes brimming with tears.

He was conflicted. He wanted to run after you, confront you, embrace you, shout at you, kiss you...but he's frozen—which was the complete opposite of what's happening inside of him.

When you left, Jungkook felt like his world stopped. He didn't want to do anything aside from being angry. Dark thought clouded his mind too. I should have died with Sooyoung that day. Jungkook also isolated himself for months.

He didn't want to see people because he felt like all of them were just going to trick him. It's very difficult to trust now that the person who he believed with all of his heart ended up crushing his spirit.

Jungkook wanted to be mad at you. How could he do it when the moment he saw you, he instantly felt like his world was spinning again?

He saw everything with color again. It wasn't stuck in your eyes or in Sooyoung's eyes. The colors were everywhere.

It's not just the colors; the air he breathed finally filled his lungs too.

And the sound ringing in his ears? It intensified. As matter of fact, he could feel his heart beating with the same rhythm of the music blasting in this bar.

I've been running through the jungle I've been running with the wolves

To get to you, to get to you

Jungkook's world was bright now that he found you. He spent the last five years running through the jungle and teaming up with wolves just to reach you.

I've been down the darkest alleys

Saw the dark side of the moon

To get to you, to get to you

Jungkook remembered all the things he had done to get to you—the thing he had to go through in order to get in touch with Hoseok.

It's not enough that Jungkook had money. Hoseok was a big deal. You had to prove yourself to him before he worked for you.

Jungkook, at the age of nineteen, begged and almost kissed Hoseok's feet just to make him want to find you.

It paid off. Hoseok was loyal to Jungkook now. He would do anything to find you.

But it wasn't easy. The detective took long to find you, forcing Jungkook to execute his own mission:

I've looked for love in every stranger, took too much to ease the anger all for you

He did. Taehyung and Jimin scolded him though. His friends told him he couldn't possibly fuck and entertain all women who sounded like you.

Jungkook cackled at the memory of that. It's like his life was flashing before his eyes. Everything came back to him, reminding him about the pain he had to go through, but it’s not to encourage him to get mad at you.

No.

Jungkook chose to think otherwise.

He was reminded of the hardships to make him realize that getting you back would be worth it.

Jungkook swore he'd get to you.

Your shift at Déjà vu started at 10:30pm every night. Seokjin couldn't afford to hire more staff so you worked for him every single day, including Sundays.

You didn't mind. You needed money and frankly, being a bartender in Seokjin's bar was easy. You got paid well even though you barely mixed drinks. As mentioned, customers rarely visited the store.

Hoseok was the only regular customer you had. Unfortunately, it looked like he wasn't going to be here tonight.

Or ever.

Another customer arrived at eleven on the dot though.

"Hi." Jungkook.

Just when you thought you'd never see him again, Jungkook came back and shattered that silly thought you had.

Like last night, you were caught off guard by his presence again. Jungkook occupied Hoseok's spot while you tried your best to smile.

You were certain you looked constipated, but you figured that's better than letting him hear your voice.

That's dangerous.

"Margarita. Please..." Jungkook said softly as he stared at you. Like last night, he looked at you like he was trying to figure out if you were the one who put the stars in the sky.

It made your heart clench. It's painful to hear his voice again after so long. Not just that, you also felt like there's something wrong with his request—like it was incomplete.

You realized you're waiting for him to say the word jagiya.

"Miss...?" Jungkook blurted out, pulling you back to reality. You spaced out in front of him. Again. What the hell was wrong with you?

You nodded at Jungkook, grabbing your shaker and not biting his bait. He called you miss and then he trailed off, as if he wanted you to say your name.

Thank goodness Seokjin didn't require you to wear a name tag. Jungkook pouted though. He thought he'd coax you to utter your name without really asking for it.

Guess he had to try harder, huh? But not now. Definitely not now. All he could do tonight was stare at you as you prepared his order.

Jungkook was the new Hoseok. As expected, the detective didn't visit Déjà vu again. However Jungkook did.

He came back every night, eleven on the dot. Jungkook was like Hoseok too. He would swiftly enter the bar and go straight to the bar counter.

Hoseok had a hat. Jungkook brought his helmet that complemented his black leather jacket.

You had never seen Jungkook dressed up like this before. He only wore a plain white shirt and sweatpants back when you were still pretending to be Sooyoung.

Jungkook was more stylish now. He even dyed his hair mint. Jungwoo, Jang-mi's three year-old son, always teased Jungkook, saying that his uncle's hair was like mint chocolate.

Jungkook's hair was also longer than you remembered. Things changed. His already toned body was thicker too. Underneath his jacket was a body that seemed like it had been sculptured to perfection. You could see the tattoos on the back of his hand too. You wondered if he was hiding his inked arms under his jacket. You wished you could see.

"Thanks," Jungkook smiled warmly at you when you placed his margarita in front of him. Tonight marked the tenth time of his visit in this bar.

Jungkook never failed to show up. Fortunately you weren't that bothered anymore. He wasn't doing anything that made you uncomfortable.

Jungkook literally sat on the bar stool, silently sipping on his drink. You noticed how he winced every time he supped his margarita. You always had to suppress your laughter upon seeing his scowl though.

You couldn't help it. A lot of things changed about Jungkook but you realized he was still the same boy who despised bitter things.

"He's staring at you again." Seokjin discreetly whispered to you while preparing the order of another customer. "Are you sure he's not bothering you?"

"I'm fine." You let out a deep breath, looking back at Jungkook who wasn't looking at you anymore. His attention was focused on whatever the other customer beside him was saying.

You turned to Seokjin, unable to stomach the sight of Jungkook conversing with another woman. What was wrong with you? You didn't have the right to feel this way.

"Do you know him or something?" Seokjin poured the drink on a glass.

You liked Seokjin, you really did, but you weren't about to tell him how you got to know Jungkook. It's fucked up. He might end up firing you or worse, hating you.

"No. Not really." You grabbed the glass of cocktail your boss had made. "I'll bring this to our lovely customer over there."

Seokjin didn't argue but you heard him laugh.

You swore you even heard him mutter "jealous," under his breath.

Jungkook didn't know how to get your attention. You always shut him out whenever he tried to strike a conversation with you.

The most frustrating part was that he never heard you speak, not even a single word. You would just smile, shake or nod your head.

It's a relief that he got to talk to another person. This woman sitting beside Jungkook randomly approached him. She talked about how much she liked his tattoos.

She surely knew how to get someone's attention.

"Glazed donut, huh?" You were on your way to deliver the woman's drink when you saw her trace her fingers on the donut inked on the space between Jungkook's thumb and index finger.

Your breathing hitched.

"Ah, it's my favorite snack. I like to uh..." Jungkook cleared his throat, you saw in your peripheral vision that he's glancing at you. His cheeks were scarlet. "...lick the sugar icing on my f-fingers."

What the fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck. This was all you could think about as you placed the woman's drink on the counter top.

"Thanks." The woman smiled at you before switching her gaze back to Jungkook. She opened another topic but you didn't hear it. Your mind was flying again.

Why did Jungkook look at you while talking about his tattoo? Could it be...did he...know who you were? Was that the reason why he kept coming back to this place?

But why? What did he want from you? Revenge? Answers? What?

"Hey, you okay?" Seokjin was standing beside you in an instant. He grabbed your shoulders because you looked like you're about to fall.

Jungkook noticed it too. He abruptly stood up, reaching out for you. He didn't get to help you though. Seokjin already saved you from falling.

"I need to go home." Your voice was barely audible, you weren't sure if your boss heard you.

He did.

Seokjin nodded his head, about to ask if you needed a ride, but you shook your head and immediately headed towards the exit.

You released a deep breath the moment you stepped out of the bar. The wind blew and you shivered.

You shivered because of two reasons. First was because of the wind, the second reason was because Jungkook suddenly grabbed your wrist, forcing you to turn to him.

He followed you.

"Are you okay?" He asked, voice laced with concern that he forgot about anything else. He even ignored your apparent shock because of the unexpected skin contact. This was just like the first time he grabbed your hand when he woke up from the coma.

The only difference was that tonight, he grabbed your hand so gently, like you were made of clay.

You didn't know how to answer Jungkook. Ugly thoughts swam in your head. You honestly believed he was here to make you pay for tricking him five years ago.

It made your head dizzy, heart beating violently against your ribcage. Jungkook's touch was like fire.

You were ice.

You pulled your hand away from him.

He was shocked. You saw hurt crossed his face.

You didn't care.

Like the first night, you ran away.

As usual, Jungkook didn't stop you.

Seokjin was worried about you.

"Do I need to kick Jungkook out of here?" This was why he asked if you wanted Jungkook to never be able to step inside Déjà vu ever again.

All you had to say was yes, however it looked like cat got your tongue. You were in conflict with yourself. A part of you didn't want to see him, the other part of you hated to lose him again. Besides, it wasn't fair to ban him from going here. He wasn't doing anything wrong. You didn't want Seokjin to lose his only regular customer.

"There's no need. I'm fine."

"You're fine?" Your boss raised his brow skeptically. It's ten minutes before eleven pm. You had to speak the truth since if ever you said yes, then he would be needing time to prepare how to kick Jungkook out nicely.

"You're fine that he's always here? You honestly don't mind that he looks at you with...I don't know… intense longing?" He uttered your name with a sigh. "That guy is whipped for you."

You almost scoffed at him when he said that. Jungkook? Whipped for you? More like detested you.

You took advantage of him, remember?

"It's either you find him cute or creepy as fuck. Either way I need you to decide. Kick him out or let him pine after you?"

"He's not pining after me!" You didn't understand why you're getting worked up because of this.

It's your stupid heart's fault. It kept skipping a beat whenever Seokjin said Jungkook had feelings for you.

Your boss sighed.

"Fine," and then he raised his hands as if he was surrendering. "Whatever you say."

The conversation ended after that. Seokjin let you practice your breathing technique that wouldn't make you look like a fool in front of Jungkook.

The clock ticked while your heart skipped beats.

11pm.

Your breathing hitched when you saw the time. Your eyes automatically drifted to the door, bracing yourself to see Jungkook.

11:25pm and there's still no sign of him.

Maybe he's running late.

11:57pm.

The bell rang.

Your eyes lit up.

But it wasn't Jungkook. It's a new customer.

You sighed.

12:04am.

1:23am.

2:06am.

3:15am.

Time passed by.

You kept your eyes glued on the door.

Seokjin tapped your shoulders, telling you your shift had ended.

"Time to go home. You look tired."

You blinked.

"Right. See you later, sajangnim..."

Seokjin just smiled, realizing that he might be wrong. Jungkook wasn't pining after you.

You're the one pining after Jungkook.

Or maybe it was a mutual pining?

Seokjin shrugged. Oh well, he'd just have to see how this would unfold.

It appeared like your love story would not progress.

It had been three days since Jungkook last visited Seokjin's bar. To be honest you're starting to doubt if he was ever gonna come back.

Maybe he realized there's no point of seeing you anymore? After all, you were nothing but a memory from the past that he should forget.

You're insignificant in his life—you were able to confirm this when after five days, Jungkook was still nowhere to be found.

His absence demotivated you to go to work. You knew you'd just end up staring at the door as you waited for him, so what's the point?

What's the point of going to work?

"Where the hell are you?" Apparently, your boss didn't share the same sentiment. He had been texting and calling you nonstop for twenty minutes now, asking why you're running late. His messages went unanswered though.

You were too busy staring outside the window of the bus to answer him. Tch. What was the big deal? You were ten minutes late, yes, but did it matter?

It's not like you had customers.

You had been late before too. Seokjin never once complained. He knew your other job was demanding. Aside from being a bartender, you also worked as a supermarket cashier, your other boss was an ass, forcing you to do things more than what you originally signed up for.

You didn't know if you could handle it if Seokjin turned out to be like your other boss. The tone of Seokjin's voice when he sent you a voice message sounded agitated, like he didn't know what to do.

It suddenly occurred to you that maybe something terrible happened at the shop. Taking this mind, you immediately headed inside the bar.

But everything seemed normal.

Except one thing.

"What happened to your face?"

You weren't sure who's more shocked. Was it you who saw Jungkook sitting on his usual spot, his face was covered with cuts. Or was it him? This was the first time he heard you spoke after five years.

"Jungkook-ssi right here stumbled across those punks at 8th street." Seokjin was the one who answered your question because Jungkook was too stunned to hear your voice.

Man, no doubt. He was really whipped for you. Seokjin wouldn't question it anymore.

"They hurt you?" It took everything in you not to cup his face. Your heart recoiled.

"Barely." Jungkook smirked. "I hit them pretty hard. Cowards. They started running."

"Jungkook!" You gasped, eyes growing big. "You shouldn't have hit them back! What if they have a weapon?"

You were fuming. He's such an idiot. An idiot who couldn't stop chuckling and teasing you!

"Are you worried about me?"

"Are you kidding me?" You lost it. You cupped his face without thinking. There were cuts but they weren't deep. It also looked like it had been treated. Seokjin helped him when he realized you wouldn't come anytime soon.

"Of course I'm worried! How could I not when you're acting like an idiot?" You titled his face, examining if there were other cuts.

Jungkook relished in the warmth of your hand gracing his skin, causing him to close his eyes. When he opened them again, his breathing hitched.

You caught his gaze, staring deep into his soft brown eyes.

"Ahem." Seokjin cleared his throat, smirking upon realizing that your face was just inches away from Jungkook.

It's like you snapped back to reality. You cleared your throat as you flinched away from him.

"I— I need to change to my uniform." You excused yourself without waiting for them to answer.

You sighed.

Operation to ignore Jeon Jungkook: failed.

You failed to ignore Jungkook twice that night. You didn't care if he realized that your voice was familiar. You'd rather be the evil person than see him get hurt again.

"Thanks for treating my face and for the drinks, Seokjin-hyung." Jungkook smiled at your boss while grabbing his helmet.

Jungkook hated drinking margarita, but he enjoyed two glasses tonight. It helped him with the pain he's feeling. Truthfully, the punches of those punks hurt like a bitch. Thank heavens Jungkook knew how to fight.

"No problem, Jungkook-ah. Just be careful on your way home, okay? Don't fight those punks. Just call the police or run fast. Remember that safety comes first! Pride comes second!"

Jungkook just chuckled. He waved Seokjin goodbye before turning to smile at you. After that he headed straight to the exit. He's surprised, however, when you trailed after him.

"Wait. Jungkook!" You called his attention. Damn him and his long legs.

"Huh?" He faced you, eyes twinkling.

"Um—I'll walk with you."

"You'll walk with me?" Jungkook reiterated your question while his nose scrunched adorably. He looked like an idiot sporting those wide doe eyes.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

"Yeah, you know...just in case you encounter those punks again."

Jungkook snorted at that, asking what you could do if ever that happened. He wasn't comfortable with the idea of you walking with him and you going back to the bar alone.

What if those punks ended up hurting you? Jungkook wasn't ready to be convicted of murder, but he'd definitely end up in prison if someone laid their hands on you.

"Don't worry about me. I know those people. We're pretty close. I grew up with them in the orphanage..." You said mindlessly.

Jungkook's jaw ticked. Right. Hoseok told him everything about you, except your name. Jungkook specifically wanted to hear it from you. Anyway, Hoseok said you were an orphan. Your parents abandoned you and you still hadn't seen them. Not even once.

You were alone.

"And I'm actually hoping to run into them. I need to kick their ass for hurting you." You joked hoping that it would somehow cut the thick layer of tension engulfing the two of you.

It worked. Jungkook smiled a little.

"Okay. I guess I'll be fine as long as you're by my side..."

Jungkook getting beaten up was like a wakeup call to you. It made you realize that life was short. Literally anything could happen right now and you wouldn't be able to control it.

Why waste time? Why ignored the person who made you happy?

"Try this." You grined cheekily at Jungkook as you placed the glass of chocolate margarita on the counter top.

This was an experiment on your part. Chocolate margaritas existed before, but you made your own version. You figured Jungkook would like it because he never said no when it came to chocolate.

As expected, he brought the glass to his lips while his eyes twinkled.

"It's so good!" Jungkook moaned, eliciting a chuckle from you. You told him to slow down because it still contained alcohol.

Jungkook didn't seem to mind though. He finished the drink immediately, chocolate syrup staining his lips.

"Wipe your mouth, you big baby!" You playfully threw a napkin on his face.

Jungkook obliged, asking this: "Can you make me another one? I want more. Please."

"Wait here." You said, grabbing your shaker and the bottle of chocolate syrup. You supposed you could add extra drizzle of syrup. Seokjin wasn't here. He couldn't scold you for pampering Jungkook a little too much.

Seokjin had been complaining these past few days. He's barely breaking even. The last thing he needed right now was Jungkook demanding extra cheese on his burger for free.

Jungkook didn't just order margarita. He also made sure to buy a burger. It's his only excuse so that he could hangout longer here. He wanted to be with you more.

He also arrived earlier than before. Jungkook was at the door at exactly 10:30pm. He would only leave when your shift ended. He'd always walk you to the bus station too.

It had been two weeks since your relationship had improved. You were still holding back though. You hadn't told him the truth; that you're the one who pretended to be Sooyoung. You hadn't even told him your name yet. You just told him he could call you Ms. Bartender.

"This is really good! Are you sure this is the first time you made this?" Jungkook said as he supped on his second glass of chocolate margarita.

You looked back at him while cleaning some bar utensils. As usual, it's just you and him. No other customers in sight.

"Maybe it's because you're doing something you love that's why you're so good at it." Jungkook said after you confirmed this was the first time you made chocolate margarita. Maybe he could request Seokjin to add this on the menu.

"But sometimes people don't really have a choice but to be good at something in order to survive." You retorted. Just like how good you were at tricking him.

Jungkook pouted his lips.

"Don't you like your job?"

"I do." You really did, but your dream was more than this. You wanted to be a bar owner. This was the main reason why you accepted the Jeons' offer in the first place.

But in the end, you chose not to accept the blank check. You couldn't do it. Your conscience wouldn't allow you to sleep.

The Jeons were very insistent though. They said it's the only thing they could do to pay you back for helping Jungkook.

"I'm happy I could help Jungkook, Mrs. Jeon. But I really can't accept the money. I'm sorry." You remembered saying this to Jungkook's mom.

Your one and only request to her was for your identity not to be revealed. You begged the Jeons not to say anything about you no matter what happened. You also said it didn’t matter if they made you look like a bad person to Jungkook. If that would help him move on from you, then it’s fine.

They complied. For five years, your life was quiet. However it didn't mean Jungkook would stop looking for you.

You were still unaware how he managed to find you. Did he have someone to help him? Was it Hoseok?

"You know, someone told me before to look at things from a different angle whenever I feel like I'm being burdened." Jungkook reminisced about what you told him five years ago. "A chore is only a chore if you think it that way."

You smiled at the memory too. Who would have thought that Jungkook took your advice seriously?

"That's a good way to look at things." You dried your hands. You're done cleaning. "Thank the person who said that for me."

For a moment, Jungkook didn't speak. He simply stared at you, trying to read your expression.

He guessed you're still not ready to admit the truth.

That's okay.

He could wait.

"I will..."

You understood Seokjin when he cried and told you he couldn't do business anymore.

He was tired.

He opened Déjà vu years ago, unfortunately he's still stuck in the same place. Seokjin regretted rushing into business. He literally knew nothing about the industry he chose.

"Sajangnim, I know we're desperate but what the fuck?" You widened your eyes at Seokjin as you asked him why in hell did he buy a grand piano, a drum set, and other instruments you doubted he knew the names.

"I'm trying to solve our problem!" He gaped at you, offended that you didn't like his idea.

You didn't. This was such a waste of money.

"It's not!" Your boss assured you. "People like music. I'm sure they'll crowd this place if they hear—"

You scoffed, refusing to let him explain any further.

"I hate to break it to you, Sajangnim, but you're not the pied piper that you think you are."

Seokjin gasped dramatically, annoyed that you didn't trust him.

"I know I'm not! That's why I'm going to invite a small band to play for us. I can pay them."

"Do you even know people who are in a band?" You folded your arms over your chest, challenging him.

However, you were surprised when his shoulders hunched, lips protruding.

"I was hoping you could help me with that..." He winced when you scoffed.

"I knew it!" And then you grumbled. This was the problem with Seokjin. "You didn't think this through." He was impulsive.

"I'm sorry, okay!?" But this was also the thing about him. He instantly accepted his mistakes. "Please help me. I can't do this without you..."

Seokjin pleaded, making you feel bad. You wanted to help your boss, but just like him, you didn't know what to do as well.

"Um—guys?" Jungkook interjected. "I heard you talking and I might have an idea..."

Seokjin's head snapped up and met the younger boy's gaze; he stared at Jungkook who was sitting on his usual spot with interest.

"Ah, Jungkookie! I know I can count on you! Please share with us your brilliant idea."

Jungkook didn't look confident, but he wanted to be helpful so he inhaled deeply, explaining that he used to play the piano in a band.

Bangtan. This was the name of their band. It consisted of three members: him, Taehyung who played the drums, and Jimin, their main vocalist and guitarist.

The three of them simply wanted to have fun. Admittedly, they disbanded right after graduating high school. Jungkook said he could still ask his bandmates to play at Seokjin's bar. Taehyung and Jimin would surely grab any opportunity to perform again.

"Are you sure, Jungkook-ah? Wouldn't it hinder your job?" Seokjin asked, worried.

Jungkook shook his head, saying that he didn't really have a 'job.' Jungkook inherited a lot of money from his parents. He utilized it from investing in the stock market and real estate. He also hired a financial manager who could help him.

Jungkook's money was more than enough to get him by until he died. On the other hand, Taehyung and Jimin were business owners as well. Jungkook was sure his best friends could squeeze in some time to perform.

"It's settled then. Thank you so much, Jungkook!" Seokjin shook the younger boy's hand. "Drinks on the house again. Order whatever you want."

Jungkook's ears perked up at that, smiling widely, he turned to you.

"Chocolate margarita please..."

You smiled at him too.

"Yeah. Coming right up."

It worked.

You couldn't believe it really worked.

"Last song for the night is our version of Unwell by Matchbox Twenty." Jimin was charming. He said these simple words but the people in this bar were already going crazy.

The power he held was insane. Jungkook and his bandmates were the sole reason why people flocked to Seokjin's bar.

It's amazing, really. In just a week, you had managed to accumulate Déjà vu's annual profit.

Gone were the days when you'd just stare at the door and wait for customers to miraculously come in. These days, you weren't even able to breathe.

Everyone was busy in this bar. There were always drinks to make, burgers to fry, and tables to clean. Seokjin had to hire more workers because of this.

"My back hurts." Yeonjun, your new co-worker, complained. He had been waiting tables for more than twelve hours already. He's spent.

"It's okay, Yeonjun. You can go home. I'll manage." You tapped your co-worker's shoulder. You honestly felt bad for him. Yeonjun worked hard just to pay for his tuition fee.

"Are you sure, noona?" Yeonjun yawned. He could barely keep his eyes open.

It's three thirty am.

“Yes.”

"Thanks. See you later, noona." Yeonjun left at once. He's scared you'd change your mind.

You wouldn't. You knew what he was going through. Besides, Jungkook was here to help you.

"Seokjin-hyung isn't paying me enough to do this shit." Jungkook complained even though he didn't mind working for your boss at all. He just despised seeing the tired look on your face. Like Yeonjun, you're working overtime too.

"I'll scold him later. Just help me now, Jungkook. I'll treat you a cup of ramen after this."

"Deal." Jungkook beamed, snatching the sponge from your hands. "Go rest on the couch. I'll finish washing the dishes here."

You didn't argue. Yawning, you plopped down on the couch. You took a nap while Jungkook cleaned up.

He didn't want to wake you up, however he knew you'd end up having a stiff neck if you slept on that God forsaken couch.

"Let's get you home..." Jungkook offered his hand, helping you stand up.

You took it but you shook your head.

"Later. We need to eat first. I promised to treat you, right?" Jungkook's too hungry to protest so he let you be.

You two went to a convenience store nearby. You brought some cup noodles while Jungkook looked for a table.

"You like your noodles like this, right?" You grinned at Jungkook as you placed the ready to eat noodles in front of him. It's fresh from the microwave.

Jungkook liked spicy noodles. You also brought some cheese and added it to his noodles.

You weren't sure how many Mrs. Jeon caught you and her son midnight snacking on spicy ramen before.

Ah. Memories.

"Yes!" Jungkook's love for noodles was apparent by the sparks in his eyes.

You chuckled. He was so adorable.

Jungkook finished his food in a few minutes. You asked if he wanted more but he simply shook his head, smiling at you.

He was content. He had the chance to eat his favorite food while spending time with you.

He couldn't ask for more.

"I'm full. Thanks, jagiya..." He said before leaning his head on your shoulder.

He closed his eyes and breathed you in.

What a happy night.

Jagiya.

Jungkook called you jagiya.

"Are you okay, noona?" Yeonjun didn't have a choice but to snap his fingers to bring you back to reality.

You're spacing out.

"Yeah." You blinked, flinching.

Yeonjun scratched the back of his head, sheepishly saying that you guys didn't have time to space out.

It was another hectic night at Déjà vu.

"I know. I'm sorry." You smiled apologetically and got back to work at once.

Damn Jungkook for distracting you. It had been hours since Jungkook called you jagiya. You didn't comment on it and neither did he. It seemed like a slip of the tongue anyway.

Still, you couldn't help but overthink.

Did he know about you? You hadn't exactly asked him that. You hadn't confessed too. You knew you should, especially now that the two of you were already friends.

Your relationship wouldn't progress if you were keeping a secret from him. Jungkook deserved to know the truth, right?

Besides, you were tired—tired from the secrets and guilt poking your shoulders from time to time.

"I need a drink." Taehyung randomly approached you. He was leaning on the bar counter and staring at you. The look on his eyes was intense.

"O-Oh. Okay. What would you like?" You stammered.

You hadn't talked to Taehyung that much. You were scared he'd tell his best friend about your identity, luckily he didn't.

Jimin kept his mouth shut too. You only met them once anyway. Maybe they forgot about you?

Whatever the reason was, you're just glad they didn't seem to despise you. They treated you the same way they treated Seokjin and your other co-workers, although...Taehyung's gaze was always intense, like he was waiting for you to mess up.

"Gibson and for you to sing."

"What?" Your eyes darted to him.

Taehyung's jaw clenched, his eyes turning dark as he said, "We need a vocalist. Jimin's voice is strained and the boss said you could sing."

The way he's looking at you made you feel like you didn't have a choice. Your legs trembled, too afraid to piss him off.

Damn it. Why didn't you object when Jungkook proposed to let Jimin and Taehyung perform at Déjà vu?

You basically dug your own grave. You're that stupid.

"Okay."

You made his drink and after that, you followed him on the stage. Jimin and Jungkook didn't have any idea that Taehyung forced you to do this.

Taehyung simply said he'd find someone who could sing. The bandmates didn't realize Taehyung was talking about you.

"We'll be performing three songs tonight. I'm sorry." Jungkook smiled apologetically at you.

You brushed it off, lying that it's fine.

It wasn't. What if you fucked up?

"Just three songs, Ms. Bartender. We're really sorry. I can't sing tonight." Jimin apologized too. He's just going to play the guitar tonight.

"Don't worry about it." You grinned at Jimin and then you asked them what songs you're going to perform.

"Never Be Alone, Electric Love, and Kiss Me..."

"Kiss Me?" You choked. Shit. Did they mean Kiss Me by...

"Ed Sheeran." Jimin confirmed your fear.

You didn't have time to react because Taehyung was already talking to the crowd, saying that they're sorry Jimin couldn't sing tonight.

"Hey..." Jungkook gently grabbed your shoulders while Taehyung spoke. He realized that you're nervous.

"Don't worry too much, okay? I can sing too. I'll duet with you."

It was a bad idea but it's too late to back out now. Everyone was waiting, even Seokjin. He's the loudest one in the crowd.

Fuck it. You said to yourself as the band started playing. Seokjin also bought a small monitor where the lyrics of the song appeared.

You didn't have a hard time singing since you knew these songs by heart, especially the last song you're gonna perform.

"Our last performance is Kiss Me by Ed Sheeran." Taehyung announced, making the people cooed.

It was such a sweet song for them. But for you? It was bittersweet. It reminded you of your last moment with Jungkook, the time when you kissed his eyes—the time when he couldn't see.

Right now, however, he could. He was actually staring at you as you sang. You both agreed to duet on the bridge part.

It was the most emotional part, you two were almost screaming at each other as a way to express the song.

It made your heart recoiled.

"Yeah I've been feeling everything—"

The song was the perfect way to describe what he was feeling starting from five years ago:

"From hate to love—"

It started from hate, Jungkook thought he hated you when he found out you're nothing but a fraud.

He blamed the whole world. He blamed his family. He blamed himself. Hell, he even blamed Sooyoung.

But as time passed by, Jungkook came to know that he didn't really hate you.

Maybe he loved you.

You took care of him, you were patient, and you tried to understand the pain he was going through.

"From love to lust—"

It changed though. Deep inside, he was haunted by your fraudulent actions. He realized he couldn't possibly love someone who he hadn't seen, who he didn't know.

Lust was all he could think about. He was in denial. He felt like the longing was actually lust. He craved you but he didn't love you.

"From lust to truth—"

But who was he kidding? He didn't know anything—not until he knew your version of the truth.

"I guess that's how I know you..."

He had to see for himself. He got to know you from hate to love, from love to lust, and from lust to truth.

This time, he wanted to know his version of truth.

That's why he stayed with you, that's why he chose to give you a chance. He wanted to get to know the real you.

Jungkook realized you're still holding something back, but your actions were almost similar to how you acted around him before.

"This feels like falling in love. We're falling in love..." The song ended with you and Jungkook still staring at each other.

You ignored the loud cheer of the crowd because all you could hear was the beating of your heart.

"See you later, noona. Just tell Jungkook-hyung I already left." For the second time around, you let Yeonjun off the hook.

He was tired and he still had classes tomorrow so you figured it's best to send him home. Again, you didn't mind cleaning up on your own.

The fact that Jungkook was here already comforted you. However, he wasn't helping you close up. Jungkook looked like he was still high from the performance four hours ago. He was still seated in front of the grand piano, just randomly playing songs that came in his mind.

"You ready to go?" You asked Jungkook after you're done cleaning. All of your co-workers, including your boss, left.

It's just you and Jungkook in here.

"Hmm," Jungkook hummed in response, lost in the music.

A smile bloomed on your face. He looked so peaceful like this; his hands were gracefully hitting the keys while his tantalizing eyes bore into you.

"Would you ever teach me how to play?" You enquired.

Jungkook hummed again, pleased to hear you ask that.

"I can do it now." The way he spread his leg and patted his thigh reminded you of the time when you visited him in his studio five years ago.

Almost everything you felt that day, you felt now too. You guessed you're just more nervous and less bold than before.

"Come here..." He urged you like the last time. He was licking his lower lip, hooded eyes making you shiver.

Shit.

Jungkook was more dangerous now that he could see.

"Hmm," he hummed again, his hands engulfing around your waist as you sat on his lap.

"Hands on the keys, jagiya."

Your breathing hitched at the endearment. He reached for your hands and he placed it on top of the keys himself.

You were trembling. You could feel his hot breath on your nape and shoulder.

Jungkook wasn't teaching you to play the piano. He just placed his hands on the back of your hands, dragging them to hit the keys.

You recognized the song he was playing. It's Inside Out. Jungkook started whispering the lyrics of the song in your ear, his lips gently biting your earlobe.

"Jungkook." You said his name and it's like music to his ears.

"What do you want, jagiya?" He enquired but his mouth was already busy doing its own thing. He kissed your shoulder going to your back.

You already changed into a black dress. This was the same dress you wore while performing. Thank heavens you had this in your locker. However you weren't sure if it was a good idea to wear this tonight.

The dress had a zipper down the back. Jungkook was actually playing with the zipper using his teeth.

"Jungkook." You should be stopping him instead of continuously murmuring his name as he dragged the zipper down. He was still using his teeth.

But you didn't. The voice inside your head was telling you to let him ruin you. It's funny actually. You couldn't believe that after teaming up with the voice inside your head for years, your relationship would still end up with betrayal.

The voice betrayed you. It was teaming up with the selfish part of you again.

It feels good. Don't stop him.

"I missed this." Your back was fully exposed now. Jungkook's dick twitched upon catching a glimpse of your underwear.

"I waited five years for this." He peppered kisses on your back. "Five years..."

Jungkook stopped playing the piano. His hands pulled down the dress and unclasped your brassiere to totally expose your body. He threw your clothes on the floor, excpet your panties.

You gasped.

"I looked for you all over the world, only to realize you're just here. In fucking Seoul."

He bit your shoulders and slapped your tits, making you yelp. But he massaged them at once, chuckling at the sound of your cries.

You deserved more punishment. Who would have thought you're in Seoul? Jungkook believed you ran very far away from him.

That's actually your original plan, but you figured no one would look for you in the same city where you committed your sins.

You're reminded of your sins.

"Jungkook..." You whined, trying to push his hands squeezing your breasts. "W-We can't..."

You had done a lot of bad things to Jungkook. Enjoying his touch was unfair. You couldn't. It's wrong, although Jungkook believed otherwise.

"Why not? We've done this before, right? It didn't stop you from grinding on my cock even though you know you're not the person I thought you were."

His voice was like a knife stabbing through your heart. His words were like poison, making you weak until you could no longer breathe.

His touches, however, were what's going to bring you back to life. Jungkook continued to touch you everywhere, a smirk was plastered on his lips because it was obvious you're so turned on right now. Arousal was dripping down your lace panties.

Jungkook let out an animalistic groan, his hand travelling to cup your clothed heat.

"Oh, jagi...you're soaked..."

"J-Jungkook..." You liked the feeling of his fingers brushing against your cunt. Jungkook dragged his lips on your exposed collarbones. His fingers were playing with your drenched folds.

"Hmm, you like that, jagi?" He cooed, heart swelling with pride because of the pleasure he elicited from you.

You could only pathetically utter his name. You felt weak in the knees already.

"You should answer when I'm talking to you," he growled, slapping your clit violently.

"M'sorry," you mewled, gripping the hem of Jungkook's shirt into a ball.

"Oh, so my baby is sorry?" He cackled, derision lacing his tone. "For what? For pretending to be my wife? For making a fool out of me? Or for leaving when I needed you the most?"

Your response was a moan. It made Jungkook angrier and hornier as he dragged his fingers through your folds, collecting your pooled-up wetness in his fingers.

"You're so hungry for me you don't even care that I know your secret?" Jungkook grunted, making sure to run his tongue down your spinal cord as he cursed under his breath.

You chose not to speak even when your stomach was twisting because of embarrassment and guilt. Was there something you could say that would make him feel better?

None, right? Saying sorry wouldn't change the fact that you had tricked him.

Jungkook hated your silence though. He roughly pushed your back, your forehead hitting the piano keys which produced an ear-shattering sound.

"Don't move." Jungkook ordered. He abruptly stood up, causing you to lose your balance.

Jungkook pushed the chair away, leaving you in a very awkward position. You were bending forward. Your forehead was still resting against the piano keys.

He ripped off your underwear.

Jungkook sucked in a breath, your ass was up in the air, cunt on full display. You looked so delicious like this, so ready to take him. He ran his tongue through your nape down to the back of your hip and then he spanked your ass.

You cried in pain as Jungkook got down on his knees. He liked the view of your cunt here more. He once again smacked your ass before massaging it.

"J-Jungkook...please eat my pussy." You didn't know where the request came from. You just claimed that you're less bold now. How the fuck did you manage to utter such filthy words?

Jungkook liked it. Your request made his dick twitched in his pants.

"Yeah? You want me to stretch you out? Eat your pussy so good till you're squirting on my face?"

Fuck. That sounded so good, both for you and Jungkook, but the latter was a bit skeptical.

"Do you deserve it, though? Do you deserve to feel good after everything you've put me through?" He snarled, but God he's so, so tempted to touch your pussy.

He gave into the temptation. Without a warning, he stuck a finger in your hole.

You whined in pleasure. More. You needed more.

"Do you have any idea how it feels to know that everything you've come to love turns out to be fake? Do you know how painful it is to know that your wife is dead? And your pretend wife left?"

The frustration was coming back to Jungkook. He inserted another finger in your pussy, pumping so hard it hurt.

Jungkook cursed.

"Ah, fuck." And then bit the inside of his cheek, his sultry gaze was directed at your cunt, watching it clench. "Your pussy lips look so puffy. I can't fucking wait to taste you."

Jungkook dove right in. He's clearly torn between punishing you and making you feel good.

He's good at both because now, you were sobbing as you rocked your hips, suffocating him with your dripping sex.

Jungkook licked a strip up your cunt ever so slowly, gathering your arousal in his tongue. You tasted better than he remembered.

"Want your fingers..." You choked back a sob. You were greedy. His tongue wasn't enough for you, but Jungkook's hands were busy unbuckling his belt and pulling down his jeans.

He stroked his fat cock.

"You asked for it," He couldn't deny you though, so he ran his tongue through your folds, slightly biting your pussy lips and then he inserted two fingers in your hole.

You screamed in pleasure. His fingers were hitting your cervix.

"You're making such a mess, baby," Jungkook chuckled, feeling your cum hit his face and shirt. You squirted and he loved it.

It's too good, better than his imagination actually. Jungkook wasn't even embarrassed to admit that he jacked off at the thought of you.

Your face was always blurred in his dreams though. Jungkook couldn't believe he survived five years just by playing the sound of your voice in his head and imagining the feel of your hands on his cock.

Jungkook stood up, his dick slapping his stomach. He needed to feel you.

"Did you miss this, baby?" He stroked his cock, slapping his length against the soft plush of your ass.

You started grinding. Jungkook's dick was so hard. You bet it'd feel good inside of you.

You voiced it out.

"Jungkook, I need you to fuck me." Need not just want. You felt so empty without him and this was the only way you could think of to make up for all the pain you caused him.

You wished filling you could fill the hole in his heart. He made you whole after all. Here's to hoping you could do the same thing to him.

"You want me to fill you up?" Jungkook cooed, his dick getting harder. He hadn't fucked you before. It's always just oral sex, the thought of finally feeling you whole made his heart swelled with different emotions.

"Fuck. I should've done it before..." He groaned, rubbing his length against your asshole before slowly dragging it down to your folds. "I should've fucked you, I should've fucked a baby in you so you wouldn't have a choice but to stay with me."

Your head was spinning because of the words exiting his mouth. But not in a bad way. You liked it.

"You want that, jagi? You want to carry my baby?” He grunted. “Because I do. I wanna see you grow big and tell the whole world you're mine." He rubbed the tip of his cock on your clit before finally filling you.

You yelped. Bloody hell. He's so fucking big.

"Is this okay," Jungkook paused for a while. He wanted to fill you fully but he didn't want to hurt you.

"I'm okay," beads of sweat formed on your forehead. "I can take it."

"You sure?" Jungkook started kissing your nape.

"Yes. Move, Jungkook. Please."

He obliged, sinking his cock deeper. He rubbed circles on your clit. Jungkook's precum was licking, causing you to get even wetter.

The piano was still producing that ear-shattering sound because of how rough Jungkook was fucking you.

You couldn't stop whining and moaning. So good.

"You fuck me so w-well—oh."

Jungkook hit your g-spot. You were seeing white, your legs shaking. You kept clenching his cock but you still came undone before him.

You could feel him slowing down.

"D-Don't stop..." You urged him to continue. "You can use me, Kookie..." Your statement only drove him crazy.

He abruptly pulled out, turning your body around so that he could see your face. Jungkook then dug his hands into your hips, carrying you and dropping you to sit on the larger lid of the piano.

Your cum dripped down. Jungkook pushed it back inside your pussy using his cock while you wrapped your legs around his waist.

"Call me Kookie again. Please." He rasped. Jungkook looked like the man you knew.

The man who would do anything you want, the boy who would pout when he's throwing a tantrum. As of this moment, you felt like he was your Kookie.

Jungkook felt like crying. He had demanded other women to call him that, testing if they sounded like you.

He's disappointed every time. But now? His dream was coming true. He couldn't believe he was hearing that nickname from the right person.

"Can I cum inside?" Jungkook was close. He was pleading, tears threatening to fall. He didn't know why he suddenly felt emotional. Perhaps it's the way you murmur his nickname, so sweet and so gentle.

"Yes, Kookie. You can..." You pushed his hair back and kissed him hard.

Jungkook responded by deepening the kiss. Few more thrusts and then he reached his high. He immediately buried his face in your neck.

You both remained quiet, allowing yourselves to breathe first.

You broke the silence after a short while. You broke it by whispering your name in his ears.

It's like a trigger.

A trigger that caused his tears to roll down his cheeks.

Jungkook sobbed, his heart recoiling.

You said it. You said your name. You finally trusted him enough to tell him your name.

Jungkook sobbed again. His face was still buried in your neck. Your tears fell too.

Jungkook kept repeating your name while crying. He liked it. He liked it so much.

He repeated it a hundred times over before kissing you on the mouth.

- ONE MONTH LATER -

"She doesn't really like flowers." Jungkook bit his nails as he watched you pick up a bouquet of white roses.

You winced at him.

"But we can't visit her empty handed, Kookie."

He wanted to say we could. The first time Jungkook visited her grave, all he brought was his remorseful self and his tears watering her headstone.

Jungkook couldn't forget that time. It was the same day he found out you were gone and Sooyoung's dead.

He was so torn. He remembered choosing between running to find you and clasping his hand together as he begged Sooyoung's spirit to forgive him.

He also remembered choosing the latter option. He was too guilty. Someone died because of him—his wife died because of him.

Maybe losing you and her was his punishment. Jungkook didn't deserve to be with someone. He didn't deserve to be happy. What he deserved was to suffer alone.

But you were here now.

You broke his curse.

You wanted to be with him. You wanted to help him heal properly.

There were still many mistakes to be fixed, sins to be atoned, but one thing's for sure: he wasn't alone.

"I think she can tolerate this." Jungkook's hand moved on its own accord. He picked up a bouquet of lilies.

Your scowl turned into a smile. Beaming, you told the seller you'd buy the bouquet Jungkook was cradling in his arms.

Jungkook asked you to hold the bouquet for him because he couldn't possibly drive his motorcycle while holding it.

You nodded and hopped on his bike. The ride to the cemetery was just a few minutes. It also took Jungkook a few moments before his tears trickled down his face.

Visiting Sooyoung's grave was similar to the feeling he had when he first found out she was dead. It still hurt like hell.

Admittedly, Jungkook rarely visited here. It's just his fifth time actually. He only went here once a year since he couldn't handle the reality reminding him that his beloved wife was dead.

"I saw her in my dream last night..." Jungkook opened up while you were patting his shoulders.

"Yeah?"

Jungkook nodded. It's the reason why he asked if you could go with him today here at the cemetery. He wanted to see her.

"She smiled brightly at me." He wasn't lying or wasn't trying to make himself feel better. He knew he fucked up. But was it wrong to think that she had somehow forgiven him?

For five years, Jungkook was haunted by his nightmare. Sooyoung would always appear in his unconscious state, like she was being consumed by darkness.

But last night was different. There's no shadow. It's just Sooyoung and her beautiful smile—the same smile that captured his heart.

Looking back, Sooyoung wasn't really as bad as what Jungkook's family made her appear. It just so happened that she lived a tough life, the kind of life that Jungkook couldn't live.

"I can't say that she forgave you, Kookie. Because I'm not her and who knows? Maybe she's never mad at you." You shrugged. "She could also be raging while watching us right now."

You laughed a little at that. Jungkook shivered. It scared him.

"Look...the point is that we'll never know. Perhaps your dream doesn't have anything to do with her at all. Maybe it's just your mind and soul’s way of telling you it's okay to move on..."

You explained to him your point. It didn't mean that he had to forget about the tragedy, but he should at least move on and try his damn best not to repeat that mistake ever again.

"Thanks, jagi." Jungkook wasn't sure what else to say so he simply thanked you and put his hand on your shoulder.

You leaned against him, resting your head on his chest.

So many thoughts were running inside Jungkook's head right now. Could he do it? Could he move forward? Could he forgive himself?

He was also thinking why this cruel thing happened to him in the first place. What was the universe trying to prove? Did it hate him? For being a brat? For not being appreciative enough? For turning his back on his family?

Was there a deeper reason why this happened? Or was it the universe's way of telling him that maybe, he and Sooyoung weren't meant to be—at least not in this lifetime...in their next life maybe they could try again.

But right now, you’re everything he had.

You and him were destined to be together in this life and to be honest, he wouldn't mind if this current lifetime would go on forever and ever.

Jungkook was happy to have you.

 this fic is a PAIN IN THE ASS to write. seriously. it took me so long! I can’t even look at this one more time. Mental breakdown is real. Please give me love (in the form of feedback) if you can. Thank you!

more JJK fics written by me: