#anumbra

- a palace of fire -

“Do any other spoonies get really pukey and anxious when they push...”

I get anxious, but I haven't felt like I needed to throw up...not sure if it's that I don't push myself hard enough to or that I just wouldn't. When I push myself I mainly get like tingly feelings where I pushed myself (like if I decide to walk in the grocery store instead...

Hmm.

anumbra replied to your post

“Do any other spoonies get really pukey and anxious when they push...”

Yeah I got myself so nervous and anxious I threw up.. I don't know how to stop it.. Helps to have someone or something to focus on.. I'll get panic attacks and then get terrible body aches and exhaustion later on.. I Hate fibromyalgia somedays..

I get the body aches bad too. :( When the anxiety is reaaaally strong I usually throw up. The only things that have worked to sort of soothe it are breathing into a paper bag or doing Nadi Shodhana Pranayama (alternate nostril breathing that I was instructed to do when I got treatment at the Chopra Center), sometimes muscle relaxants help, enough Ativan knocks me out so I can avoid the ordeal altogether but that one feels like it messes with my head so I don't like taking it and haven't in almost a year, freaking double dose lavender tea or some apple tea (I think apple just because one time in Japan, a few days before my flight home, I was about to have another bad attack so my host mom made me some apple tea and it calmed me down completely and all the color returned to my face. Not sure of its properties, I know it's good for like immune system stuff and inflammation but it's also super relaxing for me), and honestly sometimes I just put my softest pants and sweater on with my lamb hat and burrito myself in bed. I think the pressure from all the blankets is calming, it's like being hugged. xD; It's worked for me a few times. CBD oil if you have access to it, and uhh... sometimes I make myself watch this video and it distracts me enough??  

Dammit gobblebonnners.

She tagged me in this thing so now I get to answer her questions. Lets go!

Her questions:

1. Name the weirdest thing you can see right now.

These enemies in XCOM: Enemy Unknown. Fuuuuuck these assholes are ugly.

2. Favourite animal and why?

Dogs. They are always happy to see you and help you. It's beautiful. c:

3. Most painful experience?

Got my finger stuck in a door once. Yeeeeah that was stupidly painful. Rather the bone have broken but it didn't.

4. Who do you look up to most?

My Dad, Tim McIlrath of Rise Against, Burnie Burns and Geoff Ramsey of Rooster Teeth.

5. Do you think jaffa cakes are biscuits or cakes?

Had to google what those are. I say cookies (or biscuits in your country).

6. Where do you want to visit most?

Oh man.... So many places... Chicago and England are the two that immediately come to mind.

7. If you could have anybody walk through the door of the room you’re in right now, who would you choose?

Hmm.. Probably the girl I like. So we can hangout and such. :D

8. Marvel or DC?

I prefer DC for their stories (Blackest Night and Flashpoint for example). I prefer Marvel for their heroes though.

9. Favourite video game?

Tie between Pokemon HeartGold and Halo 3. Both are fantastic games and I love them for different reasons.

10. Best movie you’ve seen this year?

Frozen. Easily Frozen.

11. Tell me about somebody you know called Jess

She is very pretty, one of my only British friends, loves RT, and I enjoy her company

Guess here's a bunch of questions also.

1. Coffee or tea?

2. Thing you regret buying?

3. Why did you join tumblr?

4. Tell me a story.

5. Boobs or butts?

6. Strangest thing you own.

7. can you play an instrument? If so, what?

8. How old is your phone?

9. What is the most "budget" thing you ate? (For example, brownie in a mug or hot dog and regular bread)

10. Any other social media you frequent?

11. Beep bop boop bop.

1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?

no i would not sorry Andrew

2. You talked to an ex today, correct?

no...both of my "ex's" basically deny that i ever existed haha

3. Have you taken someones virginity?

nop

4. Is trust a big issue for you?

no im just a big doofus rly

5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently?

sorta yea. i dont rly romantically like anybody rn but theres one slight possibility that im feelin out hm hm

6. What are you excited for?

MEGACON

7. What happened tonight?

idk tonight's still happening but currently my dads coming home and we're having burgers n tater tots yum yum

8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted?

your body your choices you do what you want

9. Is confidence cute?

yea man i want u to be like im hot and i know it

10. What is the last beverage you had?

water

11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?

like...one? my man mike's there for me yo

12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans?

yeppos

13. What are you gonna do Saturday night?

probably play ffxiv for hours straight

14. What are you going to spend money on next?

probs tacos

15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed?

ider who i kissed last ngl theres like a possible 2 ppl but im not dating anyone so

16. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months?

yea ur a person u always changin

17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?

kenna and kenzie basically i dont rly have any other close friends ha

18. The last time you felt broken?

like the past few months but resolved like yesterday

19. Have you had sex today?

nope not now and not for a v long time

20. Are you starting to realize anything?

i should probos do my homework

21. Are you in a good mood?

p neutral atm

22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks?

hell yea sharks rock

23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s?

nop his are blue

24. What do you want right this second?

A MILKSHAKE YUMS

25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy?

i would say it if they talked to me anymore :')

26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color?

sort of i have the blonde so

27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?

probs not but i laugh at lots of bs so

28. What was the last thing that made you laugh?

my own spongebob gifs

29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now?

not rly ive gotten over most of that bullshit

30. Does everyone deserve a second chance?

depends on their actions and their attitudes towards them

31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to?

naw andrews a cool bro (texting counts as talkign rite)

32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do?

i dont rly have feelings for anyone so no

33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?

hahahaha no i luv soda i dont drink it a lot tho

34. Listening to?

vocaloid! currently Conchita by Meiko

35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore?

yea every fuckin day cuz my handwriting is shitt

36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is?

i dont even remember who they are so that would be no

37. Do you believe in love at first sight?

i believe in wow they hot at first sight

38. Who did you last call?

probs my sister

39. Who was the last person you danced with?

probs also my sister...line dances count right?

40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?

WHY SO MANY KISSING QUESTIONS

41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake?

hahahahhahHAHAHAH like half an hr ago

42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today?

no i havent seen my mom today and my dads out of town

43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush?

im sure i did tho i dont really do the crush thing idk

44. Do you tan in the nude?

no theres to much fat for that

45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss?

it started out with a kiss how did it end up like this

46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?

no almost nobody talks to me ever haha

47. Who was the last person to call you?

probs my sister? shes the only one that deals with my bs and thats b/c she lives with me

48. Do you sing in the shower?

yeppos

49. Do you dance in the car?

no cars make my back an dhsoulders hurt

50. Ever used a bow and arrow?

YEA THEY FUN

51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?

like three years ago?

52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?

DO U HEAR THE PEOPLE SING SINGING THE SONG OF ANGRY MEN (that means no)

53. Is Christmas stressful?

christmas is hella stressful b/c ever night for a week b4 cmas we have people in our house for like 5 hours it sucks

54. Ever eat a pierogi?

i dont even know what that is so no

55. Favorite type of fruit pie?

key l ime hands fuckin down BUT ALSO PUMPKIN 

56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?

vetrenarian, teacher

57. Do you believe in ghosts?

2spooky (sure why not)

58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?

like every fuckin day

59. Take a vitamin daily?

yupp

60. Wear slippers?

yea i wear zori when im lazy

61. Wear a bath robe?

nop

62. What do you wear to bed?

usually a cami and no pants

63. First concert?

FLORENCE AND THE MACHINE W/ MY BESTIES IN TAMPA

64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?

idk i dont shop at target or kmart

65. Nike or Adidas?

dont care

66. Cheetos Or Fritos?

CHEETOS ALL TEH WAY MOTHER FUCKERRR

67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?

MMMM SUNFLOWER SEEDS HARD DECISION

68. Favorite Taylor Swift song?

none

69. Ever take dance lessons?

yea hawaiian dancing when i was a kid

70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?

being married to me idk

71. Can you curl your tongue?

nah

72. Ever won a spelling bee?

non

73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?

yer

74. What is your favorite book?

TOO MANY BOOKS TO PICK LET ME LIST A LOT

harry potter (sorcerer's stone or goblet of fire)

a corner of the universe (i cried so hard at this book)

drift house (its a kids book but its rly interesting i think)

OMG THE SEPTIMUS HEAP SERIES DONT GET MY STARTED ON THOSE BOOKS THEY ARE SO GOOD the last one was flimsy but GR8 SERIES

out of my mind

the tale of desperaux

the book theif

graceling

ok thats it those are teh favs i can think of off the top of my head hue

75. Do you study better with or without music?

with so hard with if no music i cant do a single lick of work

76. Regularly burn incense?

i wish it smells so good but no :(

77. Ever been in love?

idk maybe i was like 15 so i was dumb

78. Who would you like to see in concert?

florence and the machine (again)

imagine dragons

passion pit

79. What was the last concert you saw?

weve done this question before

80. Hot tea or cold tea?

I LIKE ALL TEA NO DISCRIMINATION WITH TEA ALL TEAS WELCOME

81. Tea or coffee?

teaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

82. Favorite type of cookie?

in my mouth flavor

83. Can you swim well?

decently yea

84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?

yeah obvs?

85. Are you patient?

sometimes but not rly

86. DJ or band, at a wedding?

dj gimmie pumpin tunes (but sometimes djs suck idk)

87. Ever won a contest?

haha yea funny story when i was like 8 we had one of those guess the jellybeans in the jar things at my church and my grandma was like go do it girls and nicole was like ok and she put like 500 and i was like no man not enough and i put 1000 and my nana go so mad at me she was like I PAID FOR U TO ENTER THIS CONTEST AND U PUT SUCH AN INSANE NUMBER U CANNOT BE TRUSTED and then t here were like 1002 beans in the jar and i won b/c everyone else was like 800 and ive never hue'd so hard in my life

88. Ever have plastic surgery?

im like 17 wtf

89. Which are better black or green olives?

NO OLIVES OLIVES ARE SATAN

90. Opinions on sex before marriage?

your body your choices you do what you want

91. Best room for a fireplace?