#anoobis

you must have a jackal's head.

So, if we’re playing a game, and you defeat me, I’m a gay noob. I mean, this is dumb, but I understand what you’re trying to say, which is that I lack the true vigor of an actual man. Also, my inexperience at the game - as opposed to my experience at having sex with men, which is encyclopedic - renders me unable to repel your onslaught, which is sure to be savage indeed. Let’s set aside the fact that these assertions are made well before the first encounter, when you have no index of my prowess on any conceivable axis, when everyone is situated in a realm of inexhaustible life and couldn’t die even if they wanted to. When we emerge from the round, though, in the twilight phase between active rounds, your body broken clean in half by my noble order, with your last gulp of rancid air you still call me a gay noob? How does that square with your other shit? Where do you fall in the hierarchy, then? Did I defeat you with all my delicate homomancy? Call me not noob, call me Anoobis; you have entered the realm of the defeated, and you are mine.