#angstweek2020

“Alcohol is for adults. That boy is not an adult,” he replied, keeping the scowl on his face for a few seconds more until he broke down into a smile. She nudged him a little as they walked, laughing happily to herself. She was glad that everyone in the RFA cared for each other so much, even if they didn’t always show it.

Just as they arrived at the small cafe, she caught a glimpse of a nearby newspaper stand. Her fiancé’s face was on the cover of all the magazines, and she was sure they were all talking about the big business deal that was going on behind the scenes at C&R. She’d been trying to put all of it out of her mind, and lunch with Yoosung and Zen had been another effort to do so.

As the two of them ate, they talked about Zen’s upcoming musical role and about the work she was doing to prepare for the next scheduled RFA party. Lunch was delicious and filling, but she couldn’t stop worrying about Jumin. He’d been buried in work for weeks, and she knew that day would be no different. His energy was completely gone by the time he returned home, and she knew it was wearing on him more and more as the days passed.

“You know,” Zen spoke up, pulling her from her thoughts while her chin rested in her hand. She blinked at him quickly, embarrassed to have zoned out during their conversation.

“I’ve found that acting helps you forget what’s going on in real life,” he said, raising an eyebrow at her like he was proposing something. She narrowed her eyes in response, sitting back in her chair. Zen had always been able to easily read her, but she was sure anyone would have been able to tell that her mind was miles away.

“What are you trying to say?” she teased, watching as he crumpled the napkin resting on his thigh and tossed it onto his empty plate.

“I’m saying,” he started, his expression shifting into one she was more familiar with. “That coming back to my place to help me rehearse my lines would probably help get your mind off of it,” he offered, clasping his hands together when she sighed and rolled her eyes. He was always ready to beg for her help, even if he was joking most of the time. But she could tell that he was really worried about her, so she considered it.

“The CEO-in-line won’t be home for hours. Just a few scenes?” he pleaded. She weighed his statement, knowing it was true. He probably wouldn’t return home until the later hours of the evening, and it was only early afternoon. Zen sighed, giving her an overdramatic pout that broke her facade and made her laugh.

“Fine,” she agreed, seeing him happily fist pump at his side which made her roll her eyes again.

They walked back to his house from the cafe and enjoyed the nice, spring day, all while Zen filled her in on the finer details of his show. She’d heard a lot about it already, but he also focused on informing her about the character she would be playing. She couldn’t see herself getting too into it, but if it would help him, she was willing to give it a shot.

Her mind continually drifted back to her fiancé, worrying about his stamina and state of mind. She also debated about mentioning her change of plans to him. She’d never said how long she would be out with Yoosung and Zen, but she figured Jumin would want to know if she was going to be somewhere other than where she’d originally planned.

But it was Zen’s house. She knew he would be opposed to it, whether he vocalized it or not, and bothering him when he was busy with such important work was the last thing she wanted to do. It all made the phone in her back pocket feel heavier, but she tried to calm herself by reasoning that she wouldn’t be there for very long.

She’d only been to Zen’s apartment on a few rare occasions, but it felt homey and comfortable every time. She sat down on the couch, and Zen went to freshen up, leaving her to research a few acting tips on her phone while she waited. She knew he didn’t expect her to be naturally talented, but she didn’t want to embarrass herself either.

The door to the bathroom opened behind her, making her jump a little and shove her phone into her back pocket without thinking to turn the screen off.

“Ready?” Zen asked, chuckling a little as he moved to sit next to her and saw the panic in her eyes. He handed her the script, waiting expectantly for her answer.

“I guess,” she nervously laughed, completely unaware of the number she’d accidentally dialed in her back pocket.

~~~~~

Jumin’s phone vibrated irritatingly against the wood of his desk, disrupting his thoughts completely. He pinched the bridge of his nose, dimming the brightness of his computer monitor as he reached across his desk to retrieve his phone.

When he saw her caller ID, the tension in his shoulders and neck released, and he was left with a warm, excited feeling. Everything would be alright if he could just hear her voice.

“My love,” he greeted, leaning into the hand that held his phone to his ear as his tired eyes fluttered closed. But he was met with silence, making his eyebrows furrow on his forehead.

“Hello?” he called, listening carefully and hearing what sounded like rustling paper.

“Go ahead,” he heard suddenly. The voice was muffled, but when he remembered her lunch plans with Yoosung and Zen, he placed the voice as belonging to the latter of the two.

“This marriage...this arrangement,” she spoke, making him sit up a little straighter and listen harder. What was she talking about? Why wasn’t she answering him?

“Hello?” he tried again, listening intently for a reply.

“It’s not what I want!” she exclaimed, her voice pained and awkward. Jumin tried to think clearly even as his heart started to race, wondering if she’d called him without knowing.

“Then why are you doing it?” Zen asked. He tried to focus on being rational, but when he realized they were talking about their engagement, his blood ran cold.

“I have no choice! I feel so...trapped,” she responded. Jumin felt a wave of nausea crash over him, the weight of her words hitting him unexpectedly hard. He couldn’t help the anguished, shaky sigh that left his lips, his mind aching to know more even though he wished to have never picked up the phone.

“You’re the one I love. It’s always been you,” she spoke passionately. He could have sworn he felt his heart tear itself into pieces, a trembling hand reaching up to press against his chest.

“I hoped that you felt the same, but...what about him?” Zen asked, prompting the hand that held Jumin’s phone to his ear to slowly fall to his desk. He ended the call, knowing that he’d heard enough.

Jumin stared at the pile of work in front of him, absently wondering if he’d ever felt such a tight, strangling feeling in his throat before. And when a tear rolled down his cheek, he almost laughed at how ridiculous he felt.

For a few moments, he was furious with himself. He’d known better than to follow in his father’s footsteps, but he’d been blind. She’d blinded him. His heart had become hers so quickly, so completely, because he’d thought she would be different.

After those moments passed, his anger was redirected, and his hand found his phone again. He burst out of his office, knowing that things needed to be dealt with swiftly for the sake of the company. He couldn’t waste any more time.

Driver Kim asked no questions as he drove to Zen’s apartment complex, and Jumin ignored every call from Jaehee, declining them as they came. His teeth were grinding together so harshly that part of him feared his teeth would shatter. The tension in his clenched fists only grew as he imagined what the two of them were saying, or doing, as he grew nearer.

Jumin silently got out of the car once they’d arrived in front of the apartment building. He hadn’t anticipated the trembling in his legs or his hands, but he worked to make his stride purposeful and swift. He felt as if he would fall apart at any moment, but there was no time for that.

Four swift raps on Zen’s door sent his heart into a frenzy once more, and he realized only then that he would see her within seconds. Her face, her lips, her eyes, her smile. But he’d already chosen to give all of her up. She didn’t truly care for him anyway.

Zen had no smile for him as the door swung open, only an expression of confusion. Seeing the man in front of him sparked something that he’d never felt before, but he tried to contain it because he could easily see himself barreling his fist into Zen’s face.

And he might have gone through with doing so if she hadn’t popped out from behind him with the brightest smile he’d seen all day.

“Jumin!” she exclaimed, pushing past Zen and rushing to his side. She gazed up at him happily, but the look he met her with stopped her in her tracks.

“Jumin?” she asked, her voice small. His eyes returned to Zen as he felt the tips of his ears burn with anger.

“I know what’s going on,” he growled, his voice coming out much lower than he’d anticipated. Zen glared in response, looking irritatingly clueless.

“You do?” she asked beside him, her hands pressing against his upper arm and distracting him. But that only made him angrier, so he stepped away from her, trying not to acknowledge the pang of guilt that shot through him when her face fell.

“You still don’t realize you called me while you two were confessing your feelings,” he said lowly, seeing her eyes widen and shift to Zen.

“Wait--” she started, quickly being cut off.

“What are you talking about?” he asked loudly, taking a step towards Jumin. The fact that they were both trying to deny it filled him with rage, making a short, loud breath rush from his nose.

“I understand your dislike of me, but this is a level of disrespect I didn’t expect, even from you,” he spoke firmly, seeing Zen’s expression twist into anger to match his own.

“Disrespect? I have no idea what you’re even talking about!” Zen yelled, making Jumin stop and take a deep breath before he lost his control completely.

“I heard you,” he began, taking another breath before looking at his fianceé. “I heard you telling him that you love him.” Her lips pressed into a trembling pout, and tears gathered in her eyes. He looked away quickly, unable to contain the emotions surging within himself at the sight of her.

“And I heard you say you felt the same way,” Jumin seethed, returning his hard gaze to Zen. The actor flinched, stopping to think for a moment before raising his eyebrows.

“Hold on,” he scoffed, a brief laugh coming from him. The sound infuriated Jumin further, the impropriety in his crimson eyes finally pushing him over the edge.

Jumin grabbed the collar of his shirt, shoving him back against the wall next to his apartment door. Zen gasped, his eyes blowing wide open in fury and shock.

“Tell me right now,” Jumin growled, twisting his grip against the fabric of Zen’s shirt. “How long has this been going on?” His ears were ringing to the point that he couldn’t hear his fianceé begin to cry behind him, his senses completely honed in on the man he’d pinned to the wall.

“No, you listen!” Zen yelled, gripping his wrist forcefully. “If you’re talking about the lines we were practicing for my show, congratulations! You look like a complete idiot,” Zen spat, making Jumin narrow his eyes.

“Excuse me?” he spoke lowly, feeling another wave of nausea hit him but not wanting to believe he’d misunderstood so severely.

“I-I must have accidentally c-called you,” she spoke up, rushing to their sides with tears on her rosy cheeks. Jumin eyed her, glancing back at Zen for confirmation.

“She was helping me practice for my upcoming rehearsal,” the actor offered, his eyes still wide and his expression still one of disbelief. “I’ll show you the script if you still don’t believe me. Will you let go?” he hissed, yanking on Jumin’s wrist as he hesitantly let Zen away from the wall.

His eyes wandered back to her as she trembled just beside the two of them, her hands over her heart. What he’d perceived as guilt now became worry in her shining eyes, his shattered heart plummeting into the pit in his stomach. He’d never felt so childish and ashamed.

Zen smoothed out his shirt, huffing in exasperation when Jumin met his eyes for a moment. He could feel the bile rising in his throat, his knees weakening underneath himself and threatening to give out. What had he done?

“I...I’m sorry,” he choked out, not daring to meet her eyes even though her watery gaze was glued to him. He turned quickly, keeping his eyes on the ground as he quietly excused himself.

Jumin began walking back to the car, willing himself to become numb instead of dealing with the whirlwind of emotions inside of him.

He heard footsteps rushing after him, his eyes falling closed when his own steps faltered involuntarily.

“Jumin,” she whimpered, moving to stand in front of him. It took him a moment to meet her eyes, cursing himself for all of the horrible things he’d assumed about her in just the past half hour.

But in that moment, all of her attention was on him like Zen had never existed, and he wished he was worthy of falling into her arms and hiding from the rest of the world and all his sins.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, bidding more tears to fall from her reddened eyes. He shook his head weakly, clenching his fists at his sides.

“I made assumptions and didn’t think to talk with you first. I’m the one who’s should be apologizing,” he said, sounding pathetic and small. She sighed heavily, shaking her head and moving closer into a hug that he didn’t have the strength to resist.

“It’s always been you, Jumin,” she breathed, holding him tightly. He longed to find comfort in her words, but couldn’t help but find the resemblance to the ones he’d heard over the phone, line from a script or not.

He let her hold him, feeling his hands continue to tremble as he pressed them against her lower back. The way she embraced him spoke volumes to him about her sincerity, but he couldn’t remove the seed of doubt that had been planted in his heart.

So he tightened his arms around her, swearing to himself to make sure she’d remain by his side even if she’d been lying.

~~~~~

aaaah thank you for reading, and welcome to mysme angst week 2020! 

When she patted her pockets for her phone, she came up empty, and she felt her stomach drop painfully. There was nothing left for her to do but to try and find her way back. She hoped the extra time away would help calm her down, but the possibility of someone following her popped into her mind and kept her on edge as she tried to retrace her steps.

Her tears had dried and the rain had let up after a while, but she was shivering and exhausted. She could see the light of a streetlamp in the distance, but as she began to move towards it, she heard rapid footsteps approaching her.

Her heart leapt into her throat, and she moved quickly to press herself behind the nearest wall, willing her heart to stop pounding in her ears. She tried to listen, hearing whoever it was get closer and eventually slow down. She held her breath, pressing her hand against her mouth and praying for them to leave.

She waited for what seemed like hours in silence until she finally heard something that she thought she might have imagined.

“MC?” they called, making her flinch in shock. But when she realized the voice was Seven’s, she exhaled quietly, stepping around the corner.

He looked completely terrified, and his eyes were blown wide as he gaped at her. His shoulders suddenly dropped with a dramatic exhale, and before she could even blink, he’d rushed up to her and crushed her against him in a tight hug.

“What are you thinking?!” he hissed, pulling away from her just as quickly and lowering his head to be on her level. She pressed her lips together to hold back a sigh, knowing that she was going to get a lecture. The warm relief that had flooded her system ran cold, and the beginnings of a smile on her lips disappeared. She didn’t know if he expected her to answer his question, but she didn’t bother to try, seeing him already starting to say more.

“If I hadn’t put that tracker on your jacket, do you know what would have happened?” he asked, reaching up to grip her shoulders and jostle her slightly. She stared back in silence, noticing quickly how tired he looked.

“I can’t believe you’re being so stupid,” he sighed, searching her eyes when she still had no response. “Do you have any regard for your safety?” he pressed, squeezing her shoulders almost painfully. She blinked at him, letting a short sigh out of her nose at all the questions she’d heard multiple times before.

She tried not to admire the way his hair had begun to curl slightly at the tips, making her guess that he’d left when it’d still been raining. It also wasn’t hard to see the genuine worry on his face, and that almost made her smile again despite the way frustration and exhaustion bubbled inside her.

“Are you even listening?” he said through gritted teeth, moving his face closer to hers. She flinched a little, nodding.

“Yes,” she replied, seeing her answer only irritate him more. He let go of her shoulders, taking a few steps back and placing his hands on his hips.

“What are you doing out here?” She watched him, bringing her arms up to hold her middle to try and retain some of the warmth he’d given her.

“I needed some air,” she said quietly, knowing that would anger him further but being too tired to come up with a better excuse.

“Air?” he scoffed, staring at her incredulously. “Getting air can be leaving the room, like I did. Not getting lost in the middle of the night,” he said sternly, stepping close to her again and wrapping a hand around her upper arm.

“You’re unbelievable,” he sighed, beginning to pull her back in the direction he’d come. She stumbled along after him, letting her arms fall to her sides.

She couldn’t help the tears that gathered in her eyes once more, despite the fact that she knew he was being harsh on purpose. She was tired and cold, and she’d left to escape the endless stream of anger and insults, but they’d found her again.

When she sniffled loudly, his large steps faltered, and he turned back to look at her. The grip on her arm loosened while she avoided his gaze.

“Wait, no. Don’t cry,” he sighed, letting go of her arm completely and turning to face her. She quickly wiped her tears away, looking up at him to show him that she would do as he said. But once their eyes met, she could see the guilt on his face. He wanted her to hate him, but all of it was hurting him too.

She buried her face in her hands and let out a quiet sob, hearing him shuffle awkwardly in front of her. After a few moments, she felt his hands wrap around her wrists gently. She let him pull her hands away, peeking up at him.

“I’m sorry, okay?” he whispered, letting go of her wrists to run his thumbs under her eyes softly. “Just come back with me.” She sniffled, admiring the look in his eyes for another moment before nodding at his request.

“Okay,” he breathed, standing up straight again and extending a hand to her. “Here, give me your hand.” She glanced at him, seeing that he wouldn’t meet her eyes. She offered him her hand anyway, feeling the beginnings of a smile tug at her lips when the warmth from his touch began to melt away the ice in her skin.

Seven held her hand tightly as they headed back, making sure he walked at a pace that was comfortable for her and thanking God he’d found her safe and sound.

~~~~~

“My apologies,” the man smiled, giving her a once over as she turned back to him. She held her purse tightly to her side, smiling and beginning to walk towards the building once more.

“It’s alright. Have a good night!” she said politely, choosing not to ignore the way chilling goosebumps ran along her skin at the look in his eyes.

“Wait,” the man called, catching her hand and making her head whip back to look at him. She quickly pulled away from his grasp, crossing her arms over her chest and raising her eyebrows.

“Are you busy?” he asked, and she narrowed her eyes at him, feeling her stomach filling with fear.

“I’m expected upstairs,” she replied curtly, nodding once and moving away but keeping her eyes on him. He frowned, stepping forward to grab her forearm tightly.

“Don’t think you’ll be making it,” he spoke, making her heart painfully skip a beat. Her eyes shot to his, and the intimidating look on his face made her want to scream. But she steadied herself, widening her stance and beginning to pull against him. She was about to raise her hand to strike when another hand attached to the man’s wrist, gripping it forcefully and making him pull away almost immediately.

She turned to see who’d stepped in, feeling her heart soar when Jumin was standing beside her. His dark grey eyes were severe, and his gaze was locked on the man as he cradled his wrist.

“I suggest you leave,” Jumin spoke firmly, stepping forward to block her from view when the man glared at her. “For your sake.” She peered around her fiancé’s arm as the man began to walk away, letting out a quiet sigh of relief.

The man uttered something under his breath, and though she could barely make it out, it was clearly aimed to provoke Jumin. She almost ignored it, assuming that he would as well, but he took a large step in the man’s direction. Her eyes widened, and she reached forward, wrapping both of her hands around one of his.

“Jumin,” she called softly, watching as he glanced back with a startling fire in his eyes. “Let’s go inside,” she pleaded. He turned and stared as the man walked away and laughed to himself.

It took a few moments, but Jumin’s hand finally relaxed beneath hers, his shoulders dropping slightly as he turned back to her. The anger in his expression had dissolved into something else, something aimed at her.

But she quietly led him inside, keeping her hand locked with his as they rode the elevator up to his penthouse. She could feel the weight of his unspoken words for her hanging in the air, and she could easily guess what he would have to say.

She’d gone out that afternoon without any bodyguards, and although she hadn’t told Jumin beforehand, she’d planned to tell him that night. Having him catch her in the act was the last thing she’d wanted to happen, so the lecture she’d already been expecting evolved as she anticipated it.

He pulled his hand from hers when the elevator doors opened, walking just in front of her as they passed the security guards and entered the penthouse. She followed quietly, closing the door behind herself and watching as he quickly took his suit jacket off, throwing it onto the chair in the corner and rolling his sleeves up his forearms forcefully. She quickly regretted not saying something sooner, but she took a deep breath, hoping that they could be rational and talk it out calmly.

But she considered what she’d already seen from him as she removed her coat and shoes and knew that things wouldn’t work out quite like she hoped.

“Darling,” he called, his voice tight as he drew her attention back to him. He’d crossed his arms over his chest, his gaze focused directly on her.

“I’m so…” he started, sighing sharply and pinching the bridge of his nose. “So disappointed in you,” he finished, pressing his lips into a tight line as she felt herself frowning.

“Why?” she wondered, hoping he would explain it slowly and give himself time to calm down.

“It’s a simple task to ask along two bodyguards, even one, but you didn’t,” he said, uncrossing his arms and placing his hands on his hips as he held her eyes expectantly.

“I’m sorry, Jumin,” she breathed out, tilting her head and moving a few steps closer. “Having someone always watching me is so much different than what I’m used to,” she admitted, seeing his eyes narrow in confusion.

“I just wanted some time to myself,” she shrugged. He scoffed quietly, surprising her as he raised a clenched fist and pressed it against his mouth. They’d had a few disagreements before, but he’d always been able to keep his calm. She’d never seen him so out of control.

“There are ways for you to achieve that without compromising your personal safety,” he debated. His eyes were searing into her as if he’d be able to change what happened with just a look. “Do you understand what would have happened if I hadn’t been there?” She took another step towards him, speaking up quickly.

“And I’m so glad you were. But I know how to defend myself,” she told him calmly, seeing on his face that he was anything but convinced.

“Do you? I don’t remember any mention of previous self-defense classes,” he replied sourly, making her heart twinge.

“No, but--” she breathed out, hearing him laugh once and lean towards her.

“You were completely defenseless and vulnerable,” he retorted, interrupting her and making her mouth fall open slightly.

“Jumin, please calm down,” she said gently, wishing her heart would stop pounding against her ribs so that she could continue to think clearly.

“I am calm,” he said quickly, the volume of his voice contradicting his statement. “I see no reason why you even need to leave this building in the first place.” She felt her eyebrows pressing deep into her forehead, her hands shaking a little as she stared in disbelief.

“Jumin,” she called again, wishing that her voice would have been enough to assuage him. But his eyes only widened, a silent challenge for her to try and refute his statement. She straightened her shoulders, not shying away from his cutting stare.

“You can’t keep me locked in here,” she reminded him. They both knew he’d struggled and was still struggling with possessive thoughts and behavior, but hearing him voice those thoughts with such finality worried her.

Jumin raised his eyebrows at her, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned down to be at her eye level.

“Can’t I?”

Tears gathered in her eyes as she waited for him to say he’d been joking, but he didn’t.

She let out a shaky breath, finally breaking away from his sharp stare as a few tears fell.

“I’m going up to the roof,” she whispered, moving to grasp the door handle and sighing out when she heard him take a breath to speak behind her. “With a bodyguard.”

She closed the door behind herself quietly as he watched her leave, his heart beginning to ache terribly when he realized what he’d done.

Jumin’s eyes were locked on the door as he replayed what he’d said to her over and over again. The more his words were repeated in mind, the more he couldn’t imagine himself being the one who’d said them. His head was spinning, and his thoughts felt like an uncontrollable wildfire. He’d never felt so intensely emotional.

As he stared down at his hands, watching them tremble slightly, he focused on slowing his breathing. He took a deep breath in, wondering where his rationality had gone and how it’d disappeared so easily.

He glanced back to where he’d last seen her, imagining her in the garden on the roof with tears in her eyes. The very thought made him walk to the door, pulling it open and rushing to the elevator.

The cool, evening air felt nice on his skin; he hadn’t realized the heat that had flooded into his face, both from anger and then from embarrassment. He dismissed the bodyguard that was waiting by the elevator, seeing her sitting on a bench at the other end of the rooftop with her back to him.

He was sure she could hear him coming, and he felt the frown on his face deepen as he grew closer. He watched as she reached up to wipe a tear from her cheek, making the ache in his heart deepen to know he’d been the one to cause her to cry alone.

“My love,” he said softly, reaching forward as he sat down beside her to brush her shoulder.

“Please don’t touch me right now,” she spoke suddenly, making his hand flinch away from her. Her request hurt him a lot more than he would have expected, and he fought against the lump that was forming in his throat as he ran his hands along his thighs.

“Please forgive me,” he whispered, watching her hair blowing in the gentle breeze and wishing he could see her beautiful face. “I knew this would be hard and that I would need time to learn, but hurting you was not something I ever expected or wanted,” he told her, seeing her head tilt down towards her lap.

There was a heavy moment of silence before she sighed and turned to look at him, her eyes red and teary. He wanted to reach out and dry her tears, but he respected her request and kept his hands clasped tightly in his lap.

“I know you just want to protect me,” she said, reaching up to wipe a fallen tear from her cheek.

“Yes,” he said immediately, making the corner of her mouth lift in a partial smile. She searched his eyes as her eyebrows drew together.

“But you have to remember that I’m my own person as well,” she told him, and he nodded in understanding, repeating her words in his head so he wouldn’t forget.

“I don’t want to trap you. Please forgive me,” he pleaded, seeing her begin to nod in response.

“I know,” she breathed out, giving him a small smile. “I know you’re trying, and I appreciate that.”

“My emotions got the better of me,” he sighed, seeing her tilt her head. “I...didn’t know that could happen,” he said, making her let out a small giggle that lifted a weight off his shoulders.

She reached forward, taking his right hand and holding it in between the two of hers.

“I’m sorry. Truly…” he said, watching as she rubbed the back of his hand with her thumb. Their hands were cold, but he felt them begin to warm as they pressed together.

“So am I,” she said, looking up at him and drawing his gaze. “We can both do better, and we will,” she smiled, lifting his hand to her lips and pressing a gentle, lingering kiss to the back of it. The simple gesture made his heart palpitate warmly, a smile naturally spreading across his lips.

“Okay?” she said, searching his face as he felt complete devotion and adoration for her spread through his whole body. He knew in that moment that he wanted to cherish her properly and completely to ensure that he never made her feel trapped again.

She could see the resolution in his eyes, squeezing his hand between hers and knowing that everything would be okay.  

~~~~~

“And you did so without question?” he wondered, walking over to the coffee table to straighten some files and grab his empty coffee cup.

“She sounded quite upset,” Jaehee spoke, prompting Jumin’s mind to shift once again. He tried to remember if there had been any changes in her pattern of speech or eating habits recently, but he couldn’t find anything that would’ve prompted her to become upset, much less to visit him.

Despite how he was trying to logically analyze the situation, hearing that she was in distress filled him with unease, and he found himself eagerly anticipating her arrival.

“Did she mention why?” he wondered, placing his coffee cup in the sink and moving to grab a wine glass. He opted to prepare two, hoping that his guest would appreciate the choice of drink. It was strange that he’d already begun to think of ways to cheer her up when she hadn’t even arrived, and he wasn’t sure it would be a matter of his concern in the first place.

“She didn’t, but she’ll be there momentarily to tell you herself,” Jaehee replied, making his eyes find the front door once more. Jumin ended the call, absentmindedly running a hand through his hair and looking around once more to make sure the space looked tidy.

It was only minutes later that there was a brief knock on the door, the pattern consistent with that of his chief of security. He had just finished opening the bottle of wine, but he stepped away just as the man entered.

“Good evening, sir,” he said. Jumin’s tried to peer around the chief to see her, but the man stood perfectly in the space between the door and the wall.  

“Ms. MC is here to see you. Should I let her in?” he asked. The question caught Jumin off guard for a moment, finding it nonsensical but quickly remembering that he was only doing his job.

“Of course,” he nodded, straightening his shoulders as the chief stepped to the side and opened the door wider to reveal her standing there.

It was obvious that she had been crying; her eyes were swollen and remained slightly red. Her cheeks were rosy as well, and the frown on her lips looked like it had been there for quite some time.

“Hello,” he said softly, realizing that he’d simply stared at her instead of greeting her properly. He gave a parting nod to the chief, prompting him to close the door behind her and leaving them alone in silence.

“Hi,” she spoke softly, her voice sounding hoarse. He couldn’t help his curiosity; there was a myriad of questions he wanted to ask, but he first focused on being a good host.

“I was just about to enjoy a glass of wine. Would you care to join me?” he asked, gesturing towards the kitchen. She nodded, and he walked back over to the counter, pouring them both a glass while she watched. He motioned for her to take the glass as they both sat down, grasping his own and raising it slightly.

“To what do I owe the pleasure of…” he started, his voice quickly fading as he watched her tilt her head back and swallow the wine he’d poured in one gulp. He blinked at her, watching as she carefully placed the glass down on the counter.

“It’s nothing,” she said firmly, not meeting his eyes. He studied her, wondering why she’d come all that way if she intended to remain quiet about what was upsetting her. He tried to discern an explanation from just her face as to why she would have visited him rather than someone else.

“Do you need something from me?” he wondered. She sighed out slowly, tilting her head and staring at her hands as they rested on the counter.

“I just…” she started, shaking her head at herself. “I just didn’t know who else to go to,” she said, making him wonder what he possessed that put him so high on her list.

“I also knew you would probably have a bottle of wine on hand,” she said, ducking her head sheepishly. He couldn’t help but smile, a short, effortless laugh passing his lips.

“That much is true,” he said, hearing her snicker briefly. That small sound, accompanied by the slight smile she flashed him made his body feel delightfully weightless. It was a strange, warm feeling that he didn’t have a name for, but it made him realize that the stress he’d been feeling earlier in the evening had almost completely disappeared. It was hard to remember why he’d been worried in the first place, and he wondered if that relief had something to with the woman sitting next to him.

Her smile fell once more, making him notice that he’d subconsciously been smiling as well. She took a deep breath, pushing her hair behind her ears.

“Okay. It’s not nothing,” she admitted, her words heading the return of his curiosity. She eyed him, an intense sadness lingering in her eyes.

“My boyfriend cheated on me,” she said plainly, making him blink in surprise.

“Oh,” he breathed quietly, watching her clench her fists together.

“I’m just so angry and confused and just...angry,” she said through gritted teeth, her voice trembling just enough for him to notice.

“That seems like a logical response. He violated your trust,” Jumin said, watching her nod and look up at him.

“He did,” she agreed. Her bottom lip trembled, and he guessed she was holding back tears. The sight made his jaw tighten, and his mind was full of a sudden aversion for a man he’d never met and never wished to meet. But as soon as that thought crossed his mind, he imagined how quickly he would be able to ruin that person’s life if he desired it. He felt his eyebrows furrowing when he realized he didn’t have a definitive answer of whether or not he did desire to do such a thing.

“Gosh,” she sighed harshly, sniffling and shaking her head. “I just wish I hadn’t been so willing to overlook the warning signs,” she said, watching him as he busied his hands with pouring her more wine.

“Was his infidelity obvious to you?” he wondered. She let out a laugh despite the fact that he hadn’t made a joke, but it was so dry that he could safely assume the answer to his question.

“Now that I look back, yes,” she said quietly, taking a sip from her glass. His eyes were on her hands as she twirled the glass until he heard her sniffle again, looking up to see her in tears. His heart lurched at the sight, making his lips part in surprise.

“Are you alright?” he asked softly, watching a heavy tear fall from each eye and drop onto her cheeks. He pulled the purple handkerchief from his suit pocket, glad that he hadn’t dressed down since coming home from work. He offered it to her, and she hesitated for a moment before gently taking it in her hands and looking down at it.

“No,” she whispered, laughing a little. “But I’ll be fine,” she told him, using the handkerchief to blot the moisture from her cheeks. He pressed his lips into a tight line, trying to think of something that would make her feel better.

“Is there some way I can help you?” he asked, hoping that talking about a solution would temporarily distract her from the problem. “You’ve come to me in this hour of despair, but I’m not sure what to offer you aside from more wine,” he said, feeling his eyebrows crease together as he gazed at her helplessly.

“More wine is always good,” she said with a short laugh, turning to look at him with watery eyes. He held her gaze, admiring the way her eyes shimmered pleasingly as she began to smile through her tears.

“You’re really kind, Jumin,” she said softly, surprising him once more. He felt his eyebrows pull together as he considered her statement.

“I’ve done nothing that could be considered kind,” he refuted, watching her roll her eyes. He kept studying her, observing the way she looked completely unconvinced.

“You have, you just don’t want to believe you’re kind,” she shot back, a hint of teasing shining though in her tone of voice. He watched her quietly, wondering if she was right.

There was no reason to be kind to her aside from the fact that she was a member of the RFA, but when he assigned that as the reason he felt protective over her and worried for her wellbeing, the conclusion didn’t seem to fit. He couldn’t understand why seeing tears in her eyes and on her soft cheeks sparked a strange, fuzzy feeling in his chest and a frown to appear on his lips. Imagining ever upsetting her in a similar as then felt like a shot through his heart.

She shifted slightly, moving to the center of his vision. He’d been staring as he thought, and he’d forgotten to respond to what she’d said.

“I find that it’s easy to be kind to you,” was what left his lips, an unsettling feeling of bashfulness falling over him.

But his words made a smile spread across her face, a genuine, soft smile that reminded him of the wind blowing through the trees in his private garden on a spring day.

He made a note to himself to say more things to her that would prompt smiles of the same kind, but he wasn’t entirely sure why he’d gotten such a reaction.

“Oh, Jumin,” she said suddenly, her smile dropping as she glanced at the clock on the wall. “It’s getting late,” she sighed, meeting his eyes again. He shook his head at the thought of her leaving so soon.

“It’s no bother to me. I have some work to do, so I’ll be up for a while longer,” he told her. Her face twisted into an expression he hadn’t seen on her before, her lips pursing into a small pout.

“I hope you’re getting enough sleep. Have you eaten dinner?” she asked, tilting her head at him. He felt his mind go blank for a split second, his whole body seeming to reset at the concern and care in her eyes.

Her personal life had been uprooted in the span of one afternoon, yet she was using her energy to worry about him. The thought baffled him.

“I did,” he exhaled, nodding slowly and seeing her sigh in relief. He tried to refocus his mind, finding his fingers twitching slightly as his mind wondering what it would feel like to run his hands through her hair.

He forced himself to deal with the problem at hand, remembering that she’d hinted at leaving so soon.

“May I ask a personal question?” he spoke, drawing her gaze again. She nodded, smiling a little and handing his handkerchief back to him. He took it gently, seeing her tears already beginning to dry on the fabric.

“Of course,” she said, lifting her glass of wine for another sip. He folded the square of fabric in his hands slowly, pulling his eyes away from hers.

“Do you live with your significant other? Ah, forgive me. Your previous significant other,” he said, correctly himself and seeing her try to hide a wince.

“I do,” she replied, her voice becoming small once more. “But I’m going to find somewhere else to stay for now.” She looked down at her hands, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth.

“Oh, that won’t do,” he said to himself, watching her look up in confusion.

“I’d be more than willing to allow you to stay here,” he said, making her eyes widen as she stared at him. “There’s a guest bedroom on this floor. Alternatively, the floor beneath this one would also be a suitable place for you to stay,” he told her, watching her press her lips together. It was almost surprising how quickly he was willing to offer his home to her.  

“I’d hate for you to spend your money at a time like this,” he added. He watched the thoughts spin in her head, her eyes wandering across the room as he waited.

“Are you sure?” she asked, tracing the rim of her glass and glancing at him. He nodded once, but that only seemed to make her more conflicted.

“Thank you,” she sighed after a moment, making him release the breath he’d been holding unknowingly.

“It’s the least I can do,” he smiled, watching her lean down to put her head in her hands. She let out a harsh sigh of relief, and the sound, though born from distress, made him glad that he was fortunate enough to be able to help her.

His mind kept working, wanting to make sure she’d be at ease whilst staying there.

“In actuality, my bed would be the most comfortable if you’d prefer it,” he said, watching as she lifted her head slightly to peek at him with wide eyes. “I probably won’t sleep tonight now that I think about it, and it would be nice to be able to keep an eye on you,” he said, feeling his throat constrict after clamping his mouth shut. Something about what he’d said made him feel like hiding his face, but he quickly became distracted by hers.

Her cheekbones were painted in a pretty red, and her lips parted in what he guessed was surprise as she stared back at him. The sight prompted a strange tingling sensation to pass through his body.

“Are you alright? Your face has become red,” he said gently, watching as she turned away from him, clearing her throat and pressing a hand to her cheek.

“Yeah, I just...have a headache from crying,” she answered. Her words had him out of his chair in seconds, moving to the cabinet that contained medicines to find the ibuprofen. He quickly brought it back to her, tasking himself with getting a glass of water for her next.

“Thank you, Jumin. For everything,” she said behind him, making another effortless smile spread across his lips.

“There’s no need to thank me,” he replied, turning back to her with a full glass of water. He stepped over to her, holding it out to her and watching as she took it from him carefully. But as he let go, he noticed how her hand was trembling, causing the water to come dangerously close to spilling over.

Jumin reached forward again quickly, placing both hands around the glass to steady her hold. He’d accidentally clasped his hand on top of hers, meeting her eyes quickly and wondering if she felt a fire raging at the point where their skin met as he did.

He immediately felt the need to apologize. His heart was racing like he was guilty of something, but the way she was looking at him made him infinitely curious about the blossoming feeling in his chest was and how he could prolong it.

“Sorry,” she said softly, beating him to the apology as they both lowered their hands to the counter and set the glass down. She wouldn’t meet his eyes again, her face still flushed as he took a deep breath to calm himself. The waves of emotion surging through him were strange and confusing, but he wanted to focus on her wellbeing while she was in front of him.

“I’ll order some pajamas for your stay and leave you to attend to my work,” he spoke quietly. She met his gaze as he took a step back, absentmindedly loosening the tie around his neck.

“I’ll be in my office if you need anything. Please make yourself at home,” he added, nodding politely to her as she finally cracked a small smile once more.

“Thank you, Jumin. Really,” she said, her voice warm and pleasant. The thought of listening to her speak for hours on end almost completely erased any priorities from his mind, so he bowed slightly and left without another word.

He walked to his office quickly, shaking his head at the way his heart continued to race even after many minutes had passed since he’d been in her presence. He silently blessed her beautiful mind for thinking of coming to him first but wished it had been under better circumstances.

Despite the burning animosity he felt for anyone who could hurt such a gentle soul, Jumin couldn’t ebb the flow of happiness that raced through his veins knowing that she was safe in his care.

~~~~~

and that’s a wrap on mysme angst week 2020! thank you all so much for all your support! it means so so so much to me. 

i hope you all have a wonderful day, and look out for more from me in the future! <3 <3 <3 

“I just finished making dinner. Are you hungry?” she asked, watching as he slid his suit jacket from his shoulders.

“For your cooking? Always,” he replied warmly, making her heavy heart feel a little lighter.

They moved to the dining room, and she prepared both of their plates as he settled into his seat at the head of the table. She placed his plate down in front of him, taking a seat and watching his expression.

“You’re so kind, darling. Thank you,” he spoke, bringing another smile to her face. She shrugged, chuckling a little.

“It was fun,” she told him, seeing him take a bite. She’d been with him at a few dinners where the food had been less than satisfactory, so she’d come to know his reactions, however subtle, quite well. It was immediately obvious she’d done well that night, which made her let out a relieved sigh.

“This tastes excellent,” he told her, gazing across at her with adoring eyes. She felt her cheeks warm, and she began to eat to hide her bashfulness.  

“Have I told you how wonderful it is to have you greet me when I return home?” he said, drawing her eyes again as she peeked up at him. He was looking at her like she was his whole world, and to think that could be true brought a smile to her lips that made her cheeks ache.

She reached forward to brush her hand over his as it rested on the table, watching his eyes dim slightly at her touch. Her elation was short-lived, her smile dropping as she was thrown into a deep ocean of thoughts once more.

It had only been a few months since their engagement at the party. She was the happiest she’d ever been, but as the days passed, she began to wonder more and more if Jumin felt the same. His words were as sweet and loving as ever, but his actions were just the opposite. Sure, he made an effort to give her plenty of gifts, but that wasn’t what she cared about.

He wouldn’t touch her. Their hugs were always one-sided, and they hadn’t properly kissed since that day with Sarah in his penthouse. They always sat slightly away from each other on the couch, and the few times she’d held his hand, he’d seemed uncomfortable the whole time.  

It all made her wonder if he was really happy with her. She thought that maybe he felt as if they had rushed things after all, that he hadn’t been ready. Had he misinterpreted infatuation for love?

“My love,” Jumin called gently, making her realize she hadn’t answered his question. “Are you alright?” She blinked at him slowly, feeling a wave of emotions rising at his use of ‘my love.’

“No…” she said hesitantly, taking her hand back from his and placing it in her lap. His face fell, and he leaned closer, looking her once over.

“What is it?” he wondered. The palpable concern in his voice confused her, making a frown appear on her lips as she moved to stare down at the ring on her left hand.

“Jumin,” she said slowly, gathering the courage to meet his worried eyes. “Why won’t you touch me?” she asked, her voice breaking into a whisper. She fought against the lump in her throat, pressing her lips together as he let out a quiet, ragged breath.

“What?” he asked in disbelief, his eyes wide and puzzled. She sighed softly, looking down at both of their plates of food that would surely grow cold.

“I feel like you don’t want to touch me,” she said, glancing at the wall behind him as her hands trembled. “Or really even be close to me,” she spoke quietly, twisting her engagement ring and peeking at his expression. He seemed to be caught off guard, his eyebrows drawn down in confusion and his lips slightly parted.

“Have I given you that impression?” he asked, making her eyebrows furrow slightly.

“Yes,” she replied. He lifted the napkin that had been resting on his thigh to place it on the table, and it made her wonder if he was planning to leave. She sat up a little straighter, panicking slightly at the thought of upsetting him further.

“I-If you don’t like physical contact or prefer not to be near me like that, you can tell me,” she said quickly, glad when he didn’t move to stand. He met her anxious stare, looking wounded as he closed his eyes for a moment. She hesitated, feeling her chest begin to ache again.

“Please tell me,” she whispered, not wanting to leave the conversation without an answer to the question that had been eating at her for so long. He opened his eyes, gazing at her before sighing out.

“That’s not it,” he said, making her eyebrows raise.

“Then what is it?” she asked, unable to help the anticipation she felt for his thoughts.  

“This is all very new to me,” he said slowly, reaching up to loosen the black tie around his neck. “I have a hard time controlling myself around you, and…” He stopped, searching her eyes quickly and making her heart skip a beat. “I’m afraid if I give into that even by a fraction, I’ll make you uncomfortable.” Her mouth had fallen open at his words, but the slight tint on his cheeks as he stared at her made her almost laugh in disbelief.

“Oh, Jumin,” she breathed out, pressing a few fingers to her lips. He shook his head, unbuttoning the cuffs of his shirt sleeves and folding them both up once as silence fell between them.

“I’m sorry I made you think such a thing,” he said deeply, meeting her stare again. She felt the weight on her heart lessen, and a small smile turned the corners of her mouth up as she watched him.

“I wish you would have told me sooner,” she said, watching him lean back against the chair and frown. “I want to be close to you, and I want you to be close to me too,” she told him, standing from her chair to walk to his side.

She stopped just to his right, about to kneel beside his chair. As she was lowering herself to the ground, she felt his hands on her hips. He stopped her, gently shifting her weight to land in his lap. She felt her whole body flush with heat as she met his eyes, finding guilt and love in their grey depths.

She steadied herself with a hand on his shoulder, trying to calm the rhythm of her heart when he kept one hand on her waist.

“I know this is new to you, but I’m here for you,” she spoke softly, tilting her head a little as he took in her words intently. “To help you, okay?” His eyes softened once more, a smile stretching across his lips as she felt his thumb trace circles into her waist. She watched him nod, admiring her for a moment.

“Thank you,” he whispered, making her smile in return. She hummed thoughtfully, feeling her back pressing against the table.

“I’m sorry I’ve made dinner get cold,” she chuckled, hearing his gentle laugh chime in with hers.

“I don’t mind. Thank you for going to the trouble,” he said, making her bashfully bite her lip without thinking.

When his eyes were drawn to her lips, both their smiles fell, and she could feel her heart beginning to race once more. It was a long, quiet moment before he took a breath to speak.

“May I kiss you?” he asked, searching her eyes as anticipation tingled in her fingertips.

“Yes, please,” she whispered, unable to stop herself from smiling. She watched as he leaned forward, the hand on her waist stilling briefly to secure her there as their lips met. Her eyes fluttered closed as she heard him take a slow breath in through his nose. She’d missed the silk of his lips on hers more than she’d realized, but just when she thought she could drown in him, he pulled away.

Her eyes flew open, finding his already gazing at her with a warm love she’d given up hope of ever seeing again. He lifted a hand to her cheek, smiling as their noses brushed.

“I love you so much,” he whispered, the breath of his words dancing across her lips warmly. “I want to cherish you and show you just how much I care for you. Please, tell me if I ever overstep my boundaries,” he spoke, his lips brushing hers and making her gasp quietly.

“I will. I love you too, Jumin,” she said, melting into him when he didn’t hesitate to kiss her a second time. It felt like heaven when he pulled her even closer, holding her tightly against him as he kissed her time and time again.

~~~~~

“Jumin…” she breathed, running her hands over the duvet and ducking her head. “I think I’m in love with you.” Even though she was terrified, she couldn’t hold her feelings back any longer. She’d wished on every star that he felt the same way.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, the dim light of the bedside lamp illuminating the discomfort that had shone through on his face. Deep in her heart, she’d known what his answer would be. But she’d still dared to hope.

“I don’t feel the same way about you,” he said, chipping away another piece of her fragile heart as she buried the sorrow that threatened to overflow.

She smiled, nodded, and declined his apology. He couldn’t help the way he felt, so there was no need to feel sorry.

As he left her alone in his bed that night, she took the opportunity to cry. She could see how happy Jumin would be, but she wouldn’t be at his side to see it. 

Her watery eyes were on the floor when a pair of shoes appeared there, pulling her attention back to the present moment.

“Hey,” Seven spoke softly, pushing his hands further into the pockets of his slacks. She looked up at him, blinking quickly to push away any gathering tears.

“There you are,” she sighed, standing to meet him and smoothing out her dress. Seven breathed out a short, stiff laugh, shooting her a look that reflected what she imagined she would see if she looked in a mirror.

“Doing alright after all of that?” he asked. She paused at his question, watching his lips press into a thin line. She chuckled and pushed a lock of hair over her shoulder, avoiding his inquisitive eyes.

“Yeah,” she smiled, nodding to try and convince herself of her answer as well. “Tired, but alright,” she continued. He didn’t look like he believed her, but she would never admit otherwise. Maybe he could see how broken she felt through her eyes.

“That’s good,” he spoke under his breath. His stare was drawn away briefly, and she shifted her weight to her left foot as he took a slow breath in.

“Hey, uh,” Seven started, clearing his throat and taking his hands from his pockets to cross his arms over his chest. “Do you need a ride home?” he asked, making the gears in her tired head turn. Despite worrying about her return to Rika’s apartment that night and her own apartment the next morning, how she would be getting there was one detail she’d forgotten to agonize over.

“Uh,” she drawled, drawing her eyebrows down in thought. “I’ll be okay. I’m gonna make sure everything gets cleaned up around here,” she smiled, expecting a similar expression in return. But he frowned slightly, tilting his head.

“Are you sure? I know the address, so I could drop you off right there,” he reasoned, leaning closer to her. She kept smiling, shaking her head quickly.

“That’s alright. Thanks, Seven,” she replied, seeing his frown deepen as he looked in Jumin’s direction.

“No problem,” he said softly, returning his hands to his pockets and beginning to walk away. She watched him go, pushing a slow, shaky breath from her lips. Her heart was pounding at the very thought of just talking to Jumin, but she would never forgive herself if she were to miss the opportunity to talk to him before she left.

She cautiously walked toward the bar where he sat twirling his glass of champagne. He seemed to be deep in thought, and it almost deterred her from disturbing him.

“Hi,” she breathed out quietly, watching as his stormy eyes lifted from his drink to meet her stare.

“Ah, MC,” he hummed deeply, making her heart flutter at the use of her name. She stood next to the barstool to his right, placing a manicured hand on it to steady herself. He turned his body towards her, returning her gaze and making her cheeks grow warm. She really wished that he didn’t have such a dizzying effect on her, but that was yet another thing she couldn’t help.

“You must feel proud. The party was very successful for being planned in so little time,” he spoke. She smiled, glancing around at the ballroom once more.

“I do,” she said softly, turning back to him to find that his eyes had shifted back to the drink in his hand. “Thank you for all your help as well,” she spoke politely, watching him nod and quirk a small smile.

“I should thank you again as well. If not for your visit to my home, things would have gone much differently today.” His words made her stomach tighten, and when their eyes met once more, she was sure the pink of her cheeks was clearly visible to him.

She thought about how mortified both Sarah and Glam were after Jumin’s speech, and the memory was almost amusing. But what delighted her most was knowing that Jumin wouldn’t have to live a life that his father had tried to force him into. Thinking about the change Jumin went through while Elizabeth was gone lifted her spirits slightly, but she couldn’t help the tearing of her heart when she thought about how she wouldn’t be at his side to see him keep growing. He didn’t want her there.

“You’re welcome,” she replied, her voice small and airy. Jumin cleared his throat, placing his glass down gently on the bar and standing from his seat. She watched as he straightened his suit vest and coat, hearing him breathe out with a sense of finality and determination.

“I have dinner plans with my father soon, but allow me to have Driver Kim take you to the C&R building,” he said, clasping his hands behind his back as he gazed down at her. She shook her head, waving her hand dismissively.

“Oh, you don’t have to do that. I can just take a taxi,” she said, watching him shake his head in return.

“Nonsense. I insist,” he protested politely, making her lips turn up in a smile she failed to control. Others may have seen him as cold and callous, but she had learned how kind and thoughtful Jumin really was.

She said goodbye to Zen and Yoosung as Jaehee chatted with Jumin about cleanup. He waited for her by the main doors, gesturing for her to leave first.

The sun was setting when they made it outside, and the chill of evening was beginning to set in. She followed behind him quietly, grateful that she had a few extra moments with him.

“Right here,” Jumin spoke up, gesturing to the familiar Mayback waiting at the curb. She nodded, watching him from the corner of her eye. They both stopped near the door, but as Jumin moved to open it for her, she took a sharp breath in.

“Before we go,” she said, biting down on the tip of her tongue when she realized she didn’t know what she wanted to say. Jumin watched her expectantly, his eyebrows lifting as his hand fell from the handle of the car door.

“Yes?” he prompted, making her glance away quickly.

“I just, um,” she started, pushing her hair behind her ear nervously. “I wanted to thank you,” she said, nodding afterward and looking up at him. His lips twitched upward into a partial smile.

“There’s no need. I’m sure this car is much more comfortable than a taxi would be,” he said, glancing down at the car and making her mouth fall open slightly. “In addition, anything but the best leather seats could damage your dress,” he told her, briefly eyeing the gown she was wearing and making her chest tighten slightly.

“Yes, I’m thankful for the ride,” she chuckled, gripping the clutch in her hand a little tighter. “But I wanted to thank you specifically for being so kind to me,” she clarified. He tilted his head as he gazed down at her, and she didn’t try to control the genuine smile she felt tugging at her lips at the thought of the last few days she’d spent with him.

“Your hospitality was lovely, and you were so thoughtful even when you had so much going on,” she said, wondering if she’d imagined the way his eyes softened at her words.

“It was my pleasure,” he replied warmly, making her heart jump in her chest excitedly. They gazed at each other for a moment longer than she’d expected, but she was searching his eyes for something, anything, that signaled a sign of affection for her. She couldn’t help herself.

His lips parted to speak, but she panicked slightly, knowing he had a dinner to attend to soon.

“Jumin, I…” she started, hesitating before she said more than she wanted to. One look up at him made her stomach flip, his eyes wide and expectant towards her. She took a deep breath and started again.

“I truly care about your well-being. You deserve to be happy, and if I could help even a little bit, I’m glad,” she said quietly, her confidence fading as she spoke.

He smiled, glancing down quickly before catching her eyes again. The peaceful expression on his face, compared to when she’d first arrived at his penthouse, let her know that she really had done something for him. It warmed her heart to know that he would be alright. That was all that mattered.

“Thank you,” he spoke, his voice fading into a whisper. He quickly ducked his head, clearing his throat and opening the car door for her to get in. She smiled, trying to calm the butterflies in her stomach as she carefully gathered her dress and got into the car.

She turned to watch him place one foot inside the car, but his phone rang, making him pause and dig it out of his suit coat pocket. One glance at the screen made the tone of his voice shift and the expression on his face change completely.

“I must take this call. Please be safe on your way back,” he spoke distractedly, accepting the call without another word and closing the car door as he stepped back onto the sidewalk. She blinked in surprise, exhaling shakily as her heart fell.

Just like that, he was in another world, and she had no part of it.

“Ready to go, miss?” Driver Kim asked from the front of the car. She flinched slightly, her eyes fixated on Jumin as he stood with his back to her just outside the door.

After that night, when would she see him again? It wasn’t likely they would have another party so soon, and Jumin’s schedule was always full. Thinking about being separated from him for months or even years made tears brim in her eyes. And when the thought of him finding a girlfriend or wife by that time entered her mind, she held back a sob.

He didn’t love her, and she couldn’t force him to.

She nearly jumped when he turned towards her, glancing at the car in confusion. Their eyes met for a brief moment as a tear slipped onto her cheek, but then he looked away, beginning to walk back towards the building.

She bit down on her bottom lip, shaking her head at how hard she’d fallen and how devastated it’d left her.

“Yeah,” she breathed out, pulling her eyes away from him. “Let’s go.”

~~~~~