#alien from l.a.

47. Episode 516 Alien from L.A.

Summary: Supermodel Kathy Ireland makes her film debut as Wanda Saknussemm, a nerdy waitress afraid of travel and adventure who accidentally falls down a pit to the center of the Earth while searching for her missing archaeologist father. In the hollow Earth, she discovers a Mad Max-style civilization called Atlantis where the denizens do not believe in the surface world's existence and scoff at the idea that Wanda is a surface-dwelling "alien." Wanda wanders around looking for her dad and being constantly rescued from the criminal underworld trying to sell the "alien" to the government by two rugged male Atlanteans, only one of which (the one with comically little screen time) is actually the potential love interest. Someone had some big ideas for the Atlantis civilization, but any potential the movie had is spoiled by terrible execution on every story element and Kathy Ireland's - decision? direction? - to give Wanda an annoying high, squeaky voice (not her natural speaking voice) and stick to it throughout the film.

MST3K lore or notable moments: One of the sketches takes a dig at the acting talent of Kathy Ireland by presenting screenshots of her at various points in the movie and identifying her emotion as "dull surprise." This bit is the source for this meme face:

(Incidentally, Kathy Ireland is not great in this, but despite the sketch's complaints, the real problems with her character are happening at the script level, not with her acting. If the director had nixed the voice thing and she'd had a competent script to work from, she'd probably have done a perfectly serviceable job, as good or better as any of the strong men trying to be Hercules.)

What do I think about its place on the list? I liked this episode overall! I would even say I liked it a lot. However, I wouldn't put it in the top 50. (Maybe it's the me not vibing with the 80s movies again.) I do want to talk about the "sexy lamp"ness of this particular film, though. I speak of the test proposed by writer Kelly Sue DeConnick: "The Sexy Lamp test. If you can take out a female character and replace her with a sexy lamp, YOU’RE A FUCKING HACK." Despite being the protagonist, Wanda is a lamp throughout. It's theoretically her story, but she spends the movie being dropped, acquired, or pursued by different characters with varying degrees of reluctance. She does two things in the entire movie - 1) throw a rock at some guys who are trying to kill a miner, and 2) beg men for things: beg her boyfriend not to leave her, beg the miner to help her find her father, beg some other random guy who shows up to protect her from crowds after the bounty on her head. At the climax, she begs the - idk, king I guess? - of Atlantis to let her and her father go free, but her miner friend shows up to obtain the lamp rescue her before we get to find out if her impassioned pleas would have worked or not. Instead, her journey is presented as going from a nerdy, undesirable lamp that no one wants to being a sexy lamp that everyone is into. Becoming the sexy lamp is the goal.