i feel like one of those dogs who just keeps falling for when ppl pretend to throw a ball and then hide it behind their back, no matter how many times it happens i'm so genuinely and earnestly thrilled to finally be able to play with somebody and im neglected every time
this person has been flaking out and cancelling plans since the moment we met, and i still naively get my hopes up when we plan to do something, and it still hurts when she cancels last minute (today it was THIRTY MINUTES BEFORE WE WERE SUPPOSED TO HANG OUT)
ive spent this whole year just trying to be friends with the people i live with, and this entire year ive been tossed aside and ignored during the best of times and it just hurts a lot. i think if i can't find people who actually genuinely care about me soon im going to have to just like find some woods to disappear into or something
