Today I wrote 3123 words in one go on the hitman!AU and I’m mentally exhausted but kinda physically wired. Caffeine after work to wake me up and help me focus is both a blessing and a curse.
I gotta say, internet, one of the things that has helped me a lot when it comes to writing is recognizing that the base reason why I don’t write is anxiety. I can be on all the ADHD meds in the world, have all the executive dysfunction help in the universe and it still won’t do jack shit because that sick feeling is still in my heart and stomach.
I get mad rebound anxiety, too, so I don’t take PRN anxiety meds (like xanax) often. It’s just not worth spending the rest of the night snapping at everyone and wanting to die because I’m so anxious about nothing.
But caffeine? I’m used to taking energy shots on my frequent overnight drives to visit friends far away. It helps me stay up during the drive (and, uh, the rest of the next day). It also calms me down and helps me focus on the road and not like. Whatever is going on in my head at the time. Why I never connected this with “caffeine helps ur anxiety idiot” I don’t know.
My point is: If you are like me and anxiety is at the base of your writer’s block/inability to sit down and get writing done, deffo give small amounts of caffeine a shot. Like, seriously, I took a sip of a five hour energy shot at 7pm and look what I’ve accomplished in the following 3 hours!
Now I am off to put the final season of Burn Notice in my eyeballs until I am tired enough physically to go to sleep. Wish me luck!
