#adminnoona

~~ Sometimes I wonder what it’s like to really fall in love with someone and have those exact feelings returned, but then I stop and think “How am I truly able to love someone else when I can’t love myself?” I speak about love in this particular situation in the romantic sense.

I know this whole era with BTS was talking about the hardships within this long journey towards self love, and I understand that the last album says that the Answer is to finally say “I love myself and I mean it,” but let’s be real here for a moment. If that’s all it took to change people’s feelings about themselves, if it were truly that easy, wouldn’t we already love ourselves? Would we not be having these horrible thoughts about ourselves?

Don’t get me wrong, guys. BTS has definitely helped me start the process of loving myself, but they cannot be and are not the cure to my self loathing. This is something that comes from deep within. Sure, it’s easy to say “I love myself now! BTS has made me love myself!” because this is something that gives us hope. It’s something that helps us get up in the mornings. It’s something that is just purely motivational and inspirational, and we make ourselves believe that we do love ourselves when that isn’t all true. If we solely depend on the boys for our recovery or whatever it may be, we have another thing coming, honestly.

I can’t speak for anyone but myself, but I do feel that there are people who are in similar shoes as I am. I’m not saying that BTS doesn’t inspire or they haven’t actually saved anyone from themselves and from horrible things going on in life. Hell, they have made my life a lot better, but all of my personal, real life problems have not yet been solved nor taken care of. This includes my self loathing. I still have a looooong way to go before I can say “I love myself” and I actually mean it.

Again, I cannot speak for anyone but myself, but I have high doubts that anyone can say they love themselves and it be real just from listening to these albums. I love the thoughts, the concepts, the rawness, the ugly and the beautiful that the Love Yourself Era covered. This is some real shit, and I’m not trying to take away from this. This is one of my favorite eras because of everything that is covered. It’s so deep and meaningful, and I’m beyond grateful for everything that was put into this era. I just... I just don’t see it being 100% appropriate to get online and post things about loving myself when, in reality, I cannot stand myself.

It isn’t up to anyone else. It’s up to us. Only we can complete the process to true self love, and I hope to finally reach that point in my life. - With that being said, I’m sorry if you get offended by anything I typed up there. That’s not the goal here. I just wanted to share my thoughts, if anyone is actually interested. If this era has helped you tremendously, that’s amazing and I’m really happy for you. If you really do love yourself, that’s so wonderful. Don’t let anything ruin that.