#adamdriverxreader

Plopping down beside you, Adam glanced at you before turning to face the TV. Reaching over, he gently tugged your thumb away from your mouth.

“Having second thoughts about our trip?” He questioned nudging your shoulder.

Turning to face him, you sent him a stern glare. “No way.”

Adam chuckled raising his hands in surrender. “Just making sure.”

You sighed, shaking your head. “Nothing could make me not want to go on this trip with you, Adam. It’s been forever since our last best friend hangout.”

Adam frowned. “Right. Best friend.” He muttered to himself. Letting out a huff, he returned to his bedroom resuming his packing.

“How much longer until you’re ready?” You questioned standing up, making your way towards his room. Crossing your arms you leaned against the door frame. Biting your lip you gazed at Adam as he stumbled around his room.

Grinning at you, he rolled his eyes. “I’m almost ready.”

You hummed in response as you silently continued admiring him.

Once he was done, he grabbed his bag moving to stand before you. His close proximity sending his cologne through your nostrils.

“Should we go?” He questioned gazing down at you with softened eyes.

Feeling yourself at a loss for words, you gulped before nodding. Stepping aside you allowed Adam through the threshold, leading you to his car.

---

Beginning your trip, you and Adam sang along to songs, both of you singing off-key.

Gasping, you excitedly slapped Adam's arm.

“Owe, owe, what!” He exclaimed while chuckling.

“We forgot the road trip snacks!” You muttered furrowing your eyebrows together.

Rolling his eyes, he grinned. “Let’s get some snacks then.”

Pulling into a gas station parking lot, you bolted from the car before rushing inside. Roaming through the aisles, you began plucking your favorite snacks along with snacks you knew Adam would like.

“There you are! Geez, you move fast.” He chuckled, taking the snacks from your arms.

You hummed in response as you concentrated on picking drinks. Making your way to the counter, Adam was in tow.

Once you were back on the road, you let out a sigh of relief. “I can’t believe we almost forgot the snacks.” You yawned.

“That would’ve been tragic.” Adam's voice dripped with sarcasm.

Nodding your head, you attempted to make yourself comfortable in the passenger seat.

---

“Adam?” You questioned once you woke up. “How much longer?”

Letting out a frustrated sigh, he shook his head. “I’m not sure we’re going to make it.” 

“What? Why?” Your head snapped in his direction. 

“We’re about to be driving in the blizzard of the century.” He spoke frowning.

“Oh.” 

Silence fell upon you.

Gazing out of the window, your gaze fixated on a small sign in front of a Victorian house.

“Adam?” 

“Yeah?” He questioned.

“Why don’t we stay there?” You questioned pointing at the window.

“You want to stay at a bed and breakfast?” He raised an eyebrow as he turned the car towards the house.

“Why not?” You shrugged. “It doesn’t matter as long as I’m with you.” 

Realizing the weight of your words, you couldn’t help the heat that danced along your cheeks. You stared out of the window in hopes of avoiding his gaze.

Pulling into the driveway of the bed and breakfast, Adam cleared his throat. 

Not waiting to hear his rejection, you quickly opened the door before bolting up the porch stairs and making your way into the Victorian house.

“Here you are!” The homeowner exclaimed, handing you the key to your room.

“Thank you.” You spoke grasping the key. Maneuvering around Adam, you bounded down the porch stairs to retrieve your bags.

“You’re avoiding me now?” Adam's monotone voice questioned from beside you.

“I’m not avoiding you.” 

Gently grasping your wrist, he prevented you from moving. Taking a step forward, his chest brushed against yours. Gazing into each other’s eyes, neither of you uttered a word. With each breath you took, a cloud of condensation flew out. The tip of your nose beginning to chill.

“Are...Are you going to say something or...?” You questioned gazing at him.

Adam opened and closed his mouth several times before frowning.

Sighing, you shook your head. Snow began falling from the sky as you decided to go in.

---

Entering your room, you gazed at your bed before tossing your duffle bag onto it. Plopping down, you laid on your back as you folded your hands together on your stomach. 

Some time had passed before you decided to put your toiletries away and pull out clothes for the next day. 

Sitting back on the bed, you gazed down at your room key. 

‘Snowed-Inn’ read the tag. Sighing, it was the last place you thought you’d find yourself.

Knock.

Knock.

Moving to answer the door, you were surprised to see Adam standing before you with a bouquet of roses.

“I’m...I’m not quite sure what I did, but I’m sorry.” He spoke, scratching the back of his neck nervously.

Frowning you let out a sigh. “Adam, you didn’t do anything.”

“I...I thought you were mad at me?”

“I...erm...N-No. It’s complicated.”

“Here these are for you.”

Grinning you accepted his flowers, before bringing them up to your nose.

“Do you want to come in?” You questioned.

“Of course.” Adam chuckled, shutting the door behind him.

Laying side by side on your bed, you began chatting about life and entertainment. The sound of laughter filled the room.

Turning on your side, you curled an arm under your head making yourself comfortable.

Mirroring you, Adam reached up and tucked a hair behind your ear. Keeping his hand on the side of your face, his thumb traced along your jaw before making its way to your lips. Leaning in slightly, he gauged your reaction. Your breaths mingling as his nose touched yours.

“Do you kids want dinner?” 

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   Finn and Han were sprinting through the Starkiller Base headquarters, and Chewie and I were sharp at their heels. Now and then, I would hear the chaotic sounds of blasters firing and people screaming, telling me that there was some sort of brutal attack on the entire base. We raced past dozens of empty rooms, having to conceal ourselves every so often from Stormtroopers rushing to the scene of the chaos. Finn led us through winding corridors and hallways, seemingly knowing where to go, even though it felt like we weren't making any progress in this maze of a base. I was keeping an eye out for the girl I had seen earlier (Rey, I supposed), but at least an hour had gone by, and she had yet to show up.

   The shock of knowing that my squadron was alive, after believing for months that they were all dead, had been replaced with anger. Anger at my own stupidity, anger at my weaknesses, but mostly anger towards Kylo Ren. He had lied to me about everything - and because of that, I was in a completely different situation than I would have been, had I known the truth. My perspective of everything had changed; I realized that, whether General Organa had been searching for me or not, I still owed everything to her. Even if Alavai and Jaxx were dead (which they weren't), I still should have continued to push myself away from Kylo Ren, instead of finding comfort in him. I owed them that much, if not more. And Kylo Ren... I was disgusted with myself to have let him get close to me. He was a large part of the threat on the Resistance, and I had let him touch me, let him walk by my side. I still wasn't sure if what I had felt for him was a part of his control on me or not, but either way, I was horrified that I had ever even spoken with him.

   As we reached the end of the corridor, Finn and Solo pushed themselves against the wall, and I followed. Several workmen jogged by us with blasters at hand, shouting orders to each other.

   "Is that a PLX 2M?!" Solo whispered.

   Finn looked at him confusedly. "How do you know so much about First Order artillery?" he said.

   "I knew a guy who used to sell them in the underground market." Solo replied. "And, boy, what I wouldn't give to have that missile launcher right now..."

   Chewie let out a small cry, holding up his crossbow.

   "Yeah, Chewie, but sometimes you want to put more than just an arrow in someone's gut." Solo rolled his eyes.

   Finn slowly crept to the other wall, followed by the rest of us. Across the room was a large, metal door; through it's window, I could see racks and rows of different weapons. Being a natural rebel, it was a sight for sore eyes, and I was anxious to get my hands on it all.

   "Well hello beautiful..." I mumbled, unable to hide the excitement on my face.

   Solo chuckled. "She sounds more like me than my own son." he said.

   "Ok." Finn said, ignoring our comments. "First things first, we need some better weapons..." He gestured towards Chewbacca's crossbow, "... no offense. Then we need to get the shields deactivated on the base. The rebel squadrons will be coming in pretty soon, and they won't be able to deal any damage if we don't get those shields down first."

   As Finn continued to describe his plan, my attention was locked on someone else. A chrome-clad Stormtrooper marched down the halls towards the weapons room. Their armor revealed their elevated status, along with the cape that draped over their shoulders. Granted, I had no idea who they were - I hadn't seen them on the base, despite having wandered almost the entire thing.

   I tapped Finn on the arm. "That might be our ticket to the artillery room." I whispered.

   "Perfect!" he said. "Alright - Solo, you cut them off by the door - just grab their attention for a second. I'll come up behind with Chewie, and then- "

   Before he could finish, we heard a loud, animalistic cry, followed by a crash. Through the corridor, Chewbacca had thrown himself on top of the high-ranking officer - despite their attempts to throw him off, his weight held them in place. He looked back at us and gave a victorious yell.

   "You idiot!" Finn said, exasperated. "You could have blown our cover!"

   Solo pushed past Finn. "He is an idiot, don't get me wrong. But at least his heart's in the right place."

   Chewbacca let out a defiant cry.

   "Oh- I'm sorry, your highness, thank you very much for taking the initiative in this."

   Chewbacca pulled the officer back up on their feet, and held their arms securely. Finn approached them and glared angrily through their helmet. "We need access to the artillery room."

   "And what makes you think that I would give a band of fleas such intel?" she said calmly.

   "Huh." I stared right through her helmet. "Never thought the First Order would give such a high rank to a woman, given how they treat them."

   She turned her head towards me. "For your information, I earned my rank. Supreme Leader Kylo Ren's interest in my skill had nothing to do with my promotion."

   "'For your information', bitch," I held my blaster under her chin, "... Kylo Ren doesn't give a shit about you. He doesn't give a shit about who's behind that helmet. All he cares about his himself. So stop pretending that you're the favorite one here and give us the code to the damn room."

   For a moment, she stared back at me. "You're right..." she finally said. "As I recall it, you were his favorite, actually."

   My cheeks grew hot from her remark. Angry, I hit her across the side of her helmet with the end of my blaster. She recoiled a bit, and her chrome exterior now had a scratch across it from my gun. Han grabbed me by the arms and pulled me away as I tried to slug her once more.

   "Calm down, feisty!" he spun me around and stared at me in the eyes. "We need this thing alive, remember?"

   Chewbacca growled at Solo, pointing at me.

   Han sighed. "I don't know what she meant, and I don't care, ok? This chick has been helping us long enough through the base, so I'm counting on her as our way out."

   Finn spoke up. "What did she mean, you're Kylo Ren's favorite?" he gave me a suspicious look.

   "Oh, she didn't tell you?" the officer spoke again. "For a while now, she's become his pet. He's been keeping her in his chambers and providing protection for her. He even fought my general to keep her out of harm's way. I don't know what information she gave him to change him into her protector, thought it must have been important."

   "I didn't give him any information," I said angrily. "... he said he- well, it doesn't matter what he said, I didn't make him do anything."

   "Sorry girl, but it does matter." Solo looked me in the eyes again. "What did he say to you?"

   My cheeks grew hot with embarrassment. I felt like a child being reprimanded for doing something I shouldn't have. Is he really going to make me say it? "He said... he said he loved me." I mumbled quietly.

   "Huh?" Finn said.

   "He said he loved me!" I responded, a little louder than I wanted to.

   Solo now had a look of disbelief on his face. "And you believed him?! You gullible sack of scrap metal- "

   "Are you kidding me?!" Finn said, and looked like he might vomit.

   "Look, I get it, it's stupid!" I shouted. "You don't understand how dumb I feel for falling for it! I think he was controlling my mind with that dumb force shit, that's why I believed him!"

   Solo ran a hand over his face. "Oh my god, kids these days..."

   "- but I swear, I didn't tell him anything! I didn't give him information, I didn't trade anything for protection... he just, sort of did it. All by himself."

   "Ok, look here, kid." He looked back at me, serious once again. "I don't care what happened. You seem alright to me, and like you've got your senses back. You've helped us so far, so I'll trust you. But so help me, if you step one foot out of line- "

   "I swear, I won't."

   "- you're going to be his dinner." He pointed to Chewbacca, who growled in agreement. "And it's been at least four hours since he's eaten, so he's hungry."

   I looked at Chewbacca, who gave me a rather toothy, yellow grin. "I promise, I won't."

   Solo nodded, satisfied with my answer. "Good. Now, what's it gonna take to get you to open the artillery room for us?" He looked at the officer.

   Finn thought for a moment, before answering confidently. "I know where the trash compacter is."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

   After upgrading our weapons, Finn, Chewie, Solo and I continued to sneak around the corridors. Finn kept mentioning the "Rey" that he was hoping to find, which made me wonder why everyone in the galaxy was searching for this girl. Solo and Chewie continued to mumble passive aggressive remarks to each other, despite Finn's shushing. I followed closely behind them all, still fuming about Kylo Ren's lies and the officer's remarks. My emotions were a jumbled mess from being pushed away for so long, and it was getting more and more difficult to keep them at bay.

   Eventually, we had found Rey (after nearly slamming into her when turning corners). She was the girl I had seen earlier, and was much less threatening than I had assumed. Although I couldn't tell why she was so important to the First Order, I decided not to question her origin and intentions. She seemed trustworthy enough, and it was evident that Kylo Ren had traumatized her enough as well.

   Upon seeing each other, she and Finn had embraced for a while, while he mumbled apologies to her and she cried. I stood there in silence, awkwardly watching and wondering how long they had been apart. Chewie stood next to me and grumbled impatiently in the silence, to which we then continued our journey through the base. At some point, amidst the chaos and commotion of personnel running around the base, fighting whatever was attacking them, Han Solo had separated from us. Chewie told us (translation provided by Rey) not to worry - that he could handle himself.

   Finally, we arrived at a large, dark tunnel that ran deep into the ground - so much so that it was impossible to see the bottom. We carefully made our way across the thin platforms and bridges, making sure to avoid any of the Stormtroopers or officers below.

   "Where are we headed?" I asked quietly.

   "Out." Finn replied. "The Resistance is planning on blowing up the entire planet, so we need to get out of here fast."

   "The Resistance is here?!" I said in disbelief. I wondered if Kiera and Delmi were there too. For their own sake, and so I had a chance to beg their forgiveness later, I hoped they weren't. "Do you know how much time we have?"

   "Not long. Hopefully we can get back to the Falcon in time."

   "Look!" Rey cried out, and pointed to a platform below us.

   Upon peering over the ledge, my breath caught in my throat. Han Solo was standing on a bridge, right in front of Kylo Ren. My heart stopped at how close they were to each other.

   "What is he doing?" I said, leaning over the railing to get a better look. Kylo Ren's body was shaking and his shoulders slumped, and with every word he said, Solo's lip would tremble. My intuition was telling me that, whatever was happening down there, it wasn't going to end well.

   Rey furrowed her brow. "Is he reconciling to his father?" she asked.

   Like hell he is... "We need to get him away from Kylo..." I said sharply.

   "But it looks like Solo might have finally knocked some sense into that kid!" Finn was staring anxiously at the scene below. "Is... is he crying? What a big baby- "

   "He's not really crying!" I said, holding my blaster into position. "He's faking it, that son of a bitch!!"

   "Hey, watch it- "

   The sound of my blaster firing drowned out Finn's concerned voice. I never let my weapon down until I made sure it hit its mark - right in the back of Kylo Ren's leg.

   Even from the distance, I could hear his anguished cry as he keeled over. Solo looked up at us with shock and anger. He was obviously shouting in wrath, although none of us could make out what he was saying.

   "What the hell did you do?!" Finn shouted, and snatched my blaster before I could fire again. "Are you crazy?!"

   "I may have just saved Solo's life! That boy is a liar who would sell his own soul to get what he wants, and you can't trust a damn thing he does!!"

   "Or you could have killed him!!" he shouted back.

   "She's right." Rey chimed in, still watching the scene below. "He won't change. We need to get Solo out- "

   Before she could finish, the sound of a lightsaber slashing echoed through the hall. We looked back to Kylo Ren and Han Solo on the platform; Kylo's lightsaber was buried deep into Solo's abdomen.

   "NO!!" Finn shouted. Rey gasped in shock, followed by an anguished cry from Chewbacca.

   My breath caught in my throat as I watched Kylo Ren throw Solo over the edge of the platform. I could feel my heart drop into my stomach as he disappeared into the gaping hole below. I was frozen in shock. "God, no, no no..." I muttered the words over and over, hoping it was a dream.

   "He's gone..." Rey said shakily. "Solo, he's gone. Oh my god, Leia..."

   Kylo Ren looked up at us, before locking eyes with Rey. If he could have had any more hatred on his face, he did. He gripped the hilt of his lightsaber tightly, as if he were going to throw it.

   "Go, go!!" Finn directed Rey away from the ledge as fast as he could. Chewie and I continued to stand there in shock, staring down at Kylo Ren. He now stared back at me, somewhat shocked.

   How did you get here?! His words were full of rage and resentment. I could feel him trying to dig into my mind again; that same, painful scraping from before, when he had tried to interrogate me. Yet, I didn't succumb to the pain. Instead, I was able to feel his emotions. Leaking through the wrath on the surface were sadness, regret, and pain of his own.

   "Why?!" I leaned over the railing and screamed at him. "He was your father, you bastard!!"

   He glared up at me, furious that I could feel his emotions. Come here, NOW.

   The pull was stronger now - I was fighting the urge to obey his command, and it was harder than ever before. I closed my eyes and focused: don't do it, don't listen to him, think of something else. I directed my attention to my hands, gripping the railing as hard as they could.

   "What's wrong with you?!" Finn's shout snapped me back to reality. He ran towards me, Rey close behind. "We need to go, now!!" He grabbed my arm and dragged me away from the edge.

   Chewbacca began firing his blaster at whomever he could and yelled in rage. I took one last look at him - although he was beastly, I could see the pain in his expression. He was fuming and hurt that he had just lost his life-long partner, and that it was to the man's own son. He disappeared behind the walls of the room, his cries echoing, as we fled the scene.

   Finn led us outside the dark and sleek interior of Starkiller Base. When I stepped out into the snow, my eyes forced themselves shut; the world around me was so white, from the snow that completely covered the planet, to the cloudy sky above. I hadn't seen such a bright setting in ages, and it was painful to look at. I followed closely behind Finn and Rey, trying to focus on their footprints ahead of me as I fought to keep my eyes open. Above us, I could hear the sounds of X-Wing and TIE Fighters firing at each other. Debris from destroyed space crafts rained from the sky, nearly hitting us as we continued to run.

   Eventually, we entered into the woods. The sky was blocked out by the towering evergreens around us, but the snow still fell heavy. I could hear Finn's and Rey's strained breaths, as well as my own pounding heartbeat, now that the commotion was well behind us.

   "Wait!" Rey shouted, slowing to a stop. She put her hands on her knees and tried to catch her breath.

   "What is it?" Finn stopped next to her, concerned.

   Rey took some deep breaths before looking back at Finn and me. Her face was covered in tears and sweat and her hair was a mess. "Where are we going?"

   Finn looked around: although he knew where the fight was going on behind us, there was no other indication that we were heading towards safety. Or, furthermore, if there even was such a thing. The sky was growing darker with each second, making it even more difficult to tell what direction to go in.

   "I'm not sure," he finally said, "... but we just need to get away from the fight. We need to get you back to the Resistance fleet."

   "And what about Han Solo?!" I said angrily. "We're not going to talk about what just happened? That his own son just killed him, and that we had the chance to stop him? But we didn't?!"

   Finn sighed. "We don't have the time for that right now, if you hadn't noticed! And there was nothing we could do!"

   "There was!!" I stood firmly in front of Finn, staring at him with anger. "I tried to save Solo and you stopped me! I could have killed Kylo Ren that moment, but you wouldn't let me!"

   "You had plenty of chances to kill him!!" He matched my volume. "You pranced around with him for who knows how long, and you didn't do a damn thing! You're not any better than me, or even him!! Why didn't you kill him, huh?"

   I opened my mouth to answer, but I couldn't think of anything to say. Why didn't I kill him? There were so many chances I could have taken, why didn't I even think about it?

   "Face it, you've become one of them, haven't you?!" He continued.

   "Fuck off!!" I screamed as I tried to slug him across the face. Finn grabbed my arms and tried to fight back, although I held my stance firmly and continued to try and punch him.

   "Stop it you two!!" Rey shouted.

   We both looked at her. She was standing straight, her hands balled into fists, and a look of frustration hanging from her face. "What happened was awful, and I don't know what to tell Leia. But we'll have time to discuss it later. We need to get out of here, stop wasting your time and your energy being idiots!"

   Finn and I looked at each other, and instantly I felt foolish. I quickly moved away from him, and he let go of my arms. We both stared in opposite directions of each other.

   I understood what this was - for the first time in a long time, I was finally free of Kylo Ren. Now, all of the emotions that had been pushed back were rising up, more intense than ever. I had to control this, before I couldn't. I didn't want to be like Kylo Ren, who didn't care where his anger directed him.

   "Ok." Finn broke the silence. "So what now?"

   Rey looked around her, as if an answer would pop up out of the snow. "I don't know. Just keep heading away from the center of the base?"

   I nodded in agreement. "That sounds good. We should be safe for a little bit - I can't hear him right now."

   Rey and Finn both looked at me in astonishment. "What?" they both said.

   I froze. Shit! Panicking, I frantically searched for an explanation. "Wh- uhh... y- you don't hear him too?"

   "Hell no!" Finn stared at me like I was a creature he'd just discovered. "What do you mean, 'hear him' ?"

   What now, what now, what now... "I, uhh, sometimes I hear him, like he's speaking to me. Directly. But, it's... it's in my head. But I hear his voice, just... in my... head."

   They continued to look at me in shock. I shifted my weight in the uncomfortable silence. Stupid! Why the hell did you say that? What's wrong with you?!

   "How?" Rey finally said.

   I quickly shrugged. "I don't know, it just happens. He can hear me, too."

   "What?!"

   I slapped my forehead and sighed. You fucking idiot!! "I mean, he reads my thoughts! Erhm, but not all of them. I've been getting better at blocking him out."

   "Oh, so you've been practicing with him, have you?!" Finn crossed his arms over his chest and gave me a suspicious look. Rey continued to hang her jaw in disbelief.

   "No! No, that's not what I meant, just- "

   Suddenly, Rey was launched into the air, screaming as she collided with the tree behind me. She was instantly knocked out as her head hit the trunk.

   "Rey!!" Finn cried out, rushing towards her as she fell to the ground. I began to follow him as well - when I heard it.

   Come.

   I froze, fear rushing through my body. He was close. Kylo Ren was close to us. I had to get as far away from him as I possibly could.

   "No..." I answered, searching for an escape. I let my feet carry me in a random direction as I tried to find any sanctuary from the situation.

   Finn looked back at me desperately. "I need you to help me get her out of here!"

   "I'm sorry..." the words fell out of my mouth, barely a whisper. "I can't stay here, he knows I'm here- "

   "Of course he knows!" Fin shouted angrily. "He knows we're all here! We're all in deep water, not just you! If you run away now, you only put yourself in more danger, or you abandon your friends to die. Is that what you want?!"

   Finn's words quickly sank into my brain. Of course I didn't want that. Just like I didn't want to leave Delmi and Kiera behind. I didn't mean to abandon them, I was just... running away. Saving myself. Finally admitting this to myself made tears flow from my eyes. I never even thought how leaving them behind would affect them, not just my own self. How could I have done that, and truly called myself their friend? "Oh my god..."

   "Look, I almost ran away too." Finn said. "And it didn't just affect me, it affected Rey. I let my fear put my friends in danger - I was a coward."

   "I'm not a coward." my voice shook as I spoke, more to myself than Finn. Although I knew the words were a lie.

   "Then help me help her. So we can all get each other to safety." he pleaded. "If you really aren't a coward, you won't leave her behind."

   I looked at Rey, still unconscious in the snow. She needs both our help. Don't abandon them again. Don't abandon Kiera and Delmi.

   "Ok." I said, still shaking. I knelt down next to him. "What do we do?"

   Finn searched his mind for a plan. "Chewie should be getting help... we just need to keep- "

   He was cut off mid sentence by a stone colliding with his head. He was knocked back into the snow, right next to Rey.

   "FINN!" I cried, dropping next to him. There was a small trail of blood running down from his forehead, although not too much; he was just unconscious, but that wasn't good either. I scanned the woods around us, searching for Kylo Ren. Strangely, the trees were the only things surrounding the area. He was nowhere in sight.

   "What the hell?" I whispered, still in shock. I looked at the stone on the ground, just a few feet from me. It was smooth and glossy - too artificial to have been lying around in the woods. So where did it come from? And further, stones didn't just fly around for no good reason. It was Kylo Ren, it had to be.

   I shook my head, clearing the panic from my mind. I had time to get Rey and Finn to safety. And right now, that mattered more than myself.

   I quickly spotted two fallen trees, one leaning against another. It made a small shelter against the wind, and anyone who may have been coming from behind us. I scooped up Rey into my arms and carried her behind the trees. She was lighter than I had expected, and barely made a dent in the snow. Finn, on the other hand... I resorted to dragging him by his arms, and struggled to throw him over the two trunks. He landed heavily on his side, his head resting in the snow.

   Come here.

   A chill ran down my spine. It was him. The voice was calm and gentle, but it was him. Fear quickly flooded my veins and my heart pounded. How long has he been here?

   Trust me.

   "Don't you fucking dare..." I whispered, anger building in my chest. "Don't you dare think that after everything you did- "

   I kept you alive. I spared you. I gave you a chance no one else had. You should be thanking me.

   I squeezed my eyes shut. I knew he was lying, it was obvious now. Yet there was still a part of me, an innocent, gullible part, that thought he was right. And I couldn't drown out that thought.

   You're tired. You need to rest.

   "No!" I shouted, sinking to the ground. I buried my head in my knees and held my ears shut, trying to block out any thought, any lingering of him.

   I know you.

   "You don't know shit about me!!"

   Come here.

   His voice resonated throughout my head. I couldn't hear the wind anymore, I couldn't hear my own heartbeat... it was just those two words, over and over again, beckoning me to move towards Kylo Ren.  

   "STOP IT!!" I screamed. "Get out of my head!! Just get out!!"

   Come here.

   "No!" I shouted again. "I won't! Stay away from me, stay out of my head!!" I clawed at my head in attempt to distract myself from his words. They were oddly alluring to me. Instead of them being angry and violent, they were gentle. Almost as if he was cooing at me. I knew it was all a trick, but my mind was used to the softness of his voice. I was so tired, so weak, and so desperate, and the sound of his words were so enticing.

   Snap out of it!! I thought to myself. Whether the words were kind or not, this was Kylo Ren; the man who manipulated everyone and lied about everything. I shouldn't have been interested in anything that had to do with him. Yet, even as I mentally screamed at my weak will, I continued to feel the want to get up and go to him.

   Eventually, I couldn't resist the urge.

   "I'm not crazy..." I mumbled, pushing myself off of the ground and making my way to him. I didn't know why, but I didn't bother to question it.

   He was standing in front of me - where he came from, I had no idea. Upon seeing me, he removed his helmet and dropped it in the snow. His lightsaber was ready at hand, glowing menacingly against the white of the forest surrounding us. His expression was calm, though I could see a hint of anger and frustration in his eyes. I stopped a few feet away and stared at him.

   "I'm not insane." I repeated - like a broken record.

   "Do you actually think that?" he spat, his voice shaking in anger. "Can you even think for yourself anymore, after what I've done to you?"

   What does that even mean? I thought, and Kylo Ren heard me.

   "Would you believe me if I had told you that you haven't acted of your own free will since the day you got here?"

   I didn't answer. I couldn't answer, I couldn't even make any facial expression to show my pain. But the inside of my head was screaming with agony, at his words and at his hold on my mind.

   "Keeping you in that cell," he continued, "that was just the beginning of breaking you down. I knew your will was too strong to succumb to physical pain, and may have only gotten stronger through the torture. So I waited - it wasn't easy, and you know I'm not a man of patience. But I could see that leaving you alone in that cell was destroying your sanity. You became desperate for any sort of comfort or consolation, that it didn't matter from whom it came. Naturally, I took the opportunity, right when you had told me you had given up. You were at your weakest point, and I was able to control your emotions without you ever knowing it. I made you feel safe, at ease... and because your will was so broken, so defeated... it was simple, almost too easy, to make you think and do what I wanted. I could make you believe anything, trust anything, feel anything, all with a small thought of my own."

   "If you could do all that," I said, trembling, "...if I was so broken, then why did you drag it out so long? Why didn't you just get the information you wanted and kill me?"

   He didn't answer right away, as he calculated his answer. "Simple boredom." he replied. "Which was my mistake, of course. There's nothing to do on this base besides giving and taking orders. When I realized that I had created such a puppet out of you, I decided to have fun with it. Although I believe this attack could have been long avoided had I just retrieved the location of the base and disposed of you."

   My brain was hazy under his trance. Each word he spoke made me think of when I had trusted him, when I had felt comfortable around him. But the memories were sour now, and tainted with the realization that it was all a game. "You..." I began as I glared into his eyes, to which he seemed intimidated. "You are nothing but weak, and you know it."

   "Quiet!!" he cried, bringing his lightsaber up to my neck with a menacing expression. "You've been lied to since the moment you got here! You can't possibly know what I am!!"

   "I saw what you were moments ago!" I shouted back at him, ignoring the lightsaber at my neck. "You're a monster, and a murderer! But more than that, you're the rotten bastard, a disgraceful, son-of-a-bitch- "

   "I SAID QUIET!!" he growled.

   "- lazy and immature coward!!"

   "ENOUGH!!" Kylo Ren drew back his lightsaber and slashed it across my torso. I collapsed against the tree behind me, though he used the force to keep me standing up. I seethed and bit my tongue as I stared at the new mark on my stomach; it didn't cut through me, but it left a long stripe, stretching from one side to the other.

   I looked back at him. "Just kill me!!" I screamed angrily. "You've stated your intentions, and you've shown me how I'm not a piece in this game anymore - so just kill me for god's sake!!"

   Kylo Ren clenched his jaw, still fuming. "You're not going to bother asking why I'm explaining all of this to you?!"

   "I couldn't give a fuck about you or what you have to say!"

   He ignored me. "I'm telling you this now because, well... because I couldn't tell anyone else what I was doing to you. I've kept our secret for months, lest anyone find out the fact that I was just having fun. And as you should know, any type of isolation - whether it be keeping a secret, or not being able to speak to anyone but my own conscious - it's a wretched feeling. So, that is why I am explaining my plan to you. It doesn't matter if you know, since I'm going to kill you."

   But-

   "But what?" he sneered. "Did you really think I felt affection towards you? Did you honestly think I was telling the truth?" he spat the word out, as if it had tasted sour. "I must have been doing a very good job of it, then, since even now, you still believe I had feelings for you. That, or you must be terribly dense." he walked to my side, disappearing from my vision. "Think to yourself - why would I ever admire you? Why would I be so infatuated with such an insignificant person? You mean nothing to me, and you never have. Nor will you ever."

   He allowed me to speak, only to answer him. "You said that I entranced you. That you were intrigued by my resilience to the force. You said - you said you loved me." I felt stupid and ashamed repeating his words - they were obviously lies. It was so damn clear now, it made me want to vomit. And I had been so blind to believe that they were true. It was sickening to know that I had ever accepted them to be real. It made me realize how weak I was, how gullible I had been.

   "Not all of that is a lie." He stated, as I got back up on my feet. "I was interested in you. You had the strongest willpower of the pilots in your squadron. Possibly, of all the pilots I have come across. I was confused in how you were able to remain reserved under the force. But I never loved you." he chuckled to himself. "It's funny to think that you believed me when I said that. All it took were a few lies, and I was able to control you, little by little."

   He sighed, turning to look me in the eyes. "It is, however, disheartening, to think that all this work I put into you still resulted in nothing. I had hoped that in a few weeks you would have revealed the location of the Resistance Base, but then they had to come and initiate an attack. I wasn't able to fight them off and keep you under my control. Even the most experienced Jedi can't control that much at once."

   Anger welled up in my chest, and I wanted to scream. I wanted to punch, scratch, kick, do whatever I could to injure Kylo. However, the restraint holding me back from hurting him only fueled my anger, which led to tears falling down my cheeks. Everything he was saying was so painful, but now that I knew, I wasn't shocked by any of it. It was something I had expected from so wicked a person, yet every second of listening to him speak was torture.

   "You think this, right now, is torture." he said. "But wait until I finally kill you."

   This caught me off guard; I chuckled to myself a bit. "You know what? I've been waiting for it for weeks." I said with a sneer. I knew he hated that, and I didn't care. For the first time in a long time, I felt liberated. Kylo Ren was about to kill me. I was going to die - death was right in front of me, shrouded in black and angry that I had managed to escape his grasp more than once. I wasn't afraid. I wasn't giving up, either... I just felt at peace.

   But of course, he wasn't going to let me have that. "I will thoroughly enjoy this, my dear."

   As he said this, he pushed the cross hair of his lightsaber into my abdomen. A fierce heat flowed violently from the lightsaber and into the rest of my body, and my muscles twitched and seized instinctively from the wound. Even though I was still under his grasp on my mind, I stuttered and shook in pain. Tears began to fall harder, and I could feel the lightsaber cauterizing as quickly as it tore through my skin.. It was warm, but it only made the pain worse as time went on. My breath was heavy and cold, and my heartbeat had quickened drastically. I felt the pain; I knew it was pain, and it made me want to scream and writhe in agony. But all I could do was stand there and stare Kylo in the eyes, until he either released my mind from his grip, or finally killed me. And I was sure it would be the latter.

   Fear

   But I wasn't afraid.

   Father. Han Solo.

   These images and thoughts in my mind weren't my own...

   Pain

   These were his thoughts. Kylo Ren's thoughts. Why could I hear them? Why were they so loud in my head?

   I can't do this.

   I looked at him in the eyes. Does he know I can hear him? I thought. The pain from the lightsaber subsided as I continued to listen to his thoughts.

   Suddenly, I noticed his expression change; he seemed angry, as if I had insulted him. His eyes widened, and leaned in closer to my face. "You will not break me!!" he spat.

   The next words that slipped from my mouth... I'm not sure where they came from. I can't even say that they were my own.

   "I won't be the one to break you, Ben."

   Upon hearing me speak, he wrapped his hand around my throat and began to choke me. The lack of oxygen was excruciating, however, I continued to be numb to the pain.

   "What did you say?" he growled.

   I struggled against his grip, trying to pry away his fingers with my own. I attempted to answer him, but his hand only tightened around my neck with each gasp.

   Suddenly, a blue light raced past my head. Kylo was forcefully knocked to the ground, tearing his lightsaber away from my side. I could feel the force being pulled from my head, and almost instantly, pain replaced it. I fell backwards into the snow, screaming in anguish from the pain in my abdomen. My muscles convulsed involuntarily, my head seared with pain - it was all so much at once. Only moments before, Kylo was holding me back from reacting to the wound, and now that he was gone, all I could feel was the searing heat in my side..

She, closed her eyes and gently fell back into him, causing him to lose his balance a little, moving his arms to regain his balance, while she wrapped her right arm around behind her into Adam, pulling him closer to her.

This caused you to gasp. You were well aware, of how attractive your boyfriend was to others, so you were no stranger to this type of thing. The feeling of jealousy ran through your body. Deciding you were going to wait up for him to come home, you were going to show him just who you were.

You went the whole nine yards, curling your hair, doing your makeup. You had bought a new lingerie set, but you wanted to put it on, for a special occasion to surprise Adam. Deciding to put it on now, was easy. Knowing, he would be home soon you grabbed your favorite silk kimono, and slipped it on. Putting the finishing touches on, you waited in the bedroom.

It wasn’t long, before you heard the jiggling of the front door.

“Babe, I’m home.”

Making your way out of the bedroom, you could see he had his back to you, hanging up his jacket. You took the opportunity to your advantage. Walking up behind him, you made the movements as if you were going to hug him, your chest pressed against his back, your arms snaking around his waist placing your hands on his chest.

“I missed you.” You said in a sultry voice, causing Adam to pause his movements. He wasn’t quite sure what to expect when he got him, but surely wasn’t expecting this.

Moving your hands ever so slightly, down you could tell he was having a hard (no pun intended. What the hell. Yeah pun intended.) time. His breathing began to shorten, and he was practically panting. You hadn’t even touched him yet, and he was already unraveling.

It was quiet. Suddenly, the only sound was a low groan coming from the man in front of you. Your hands reached his belt, finally reaching the buldge in his jean that hand begun to form. Lightly, you began to bite all over his shoulders. Feeling, one of his hands clamp over one of yours, he guided it to where he was needing some sort of friction.

Deciding that you roiled him up enough, you took a set back, and said

“You did good tonight. I especially loved the ending.” You voice was laced with jealousy.

“That’s what this is about?” He chuckled darkly.

Before you could respond, he hand your face in his hands moving you to look up at him. He leaned down, and gently placed a lips on yours. They were soft, and warm. The feeling caused you to moan into his lips.

Smiling into the kiss, he pulled back and sat on the couch.

“Maybe, I should make you jealous more often.” He said deeply.

Before you could think of a response, you had practically, ran over to the couch, and placed your self on his lap. Instinctively, his hands found themselves on your hips. He tried to take control of the situation, running his hands down your thighs, placing kisses all over your face, before making their way to your neck. Placing open mouth kisses, on your neck he wanted to mark you as his. He lightly began biting, and sucking on your neck. By this time, you were unraveling much faster then he was. One, of your hands had made its way into Adams hair, pulling him closer to you, while the other was placed on his shoulder lightly squeezing, and digging your nails into him when he did something you liked.

Pulling you back to reality, you heard the chime of his phone go off. You pulled away, causing him to grown and to try and follow your sudden movement. The hand that was on his shoulder, slid down to his chest to push him into the back of the couch.

Wanting to take control, you began moving your hips to cause some friction. You crashed your lips on his, continuing your hips movement. Opening your mouth, your tongue made its way, running along his bottom lip. Eagerly, he opened his mouth allowing you to slip your tongue into his mouth. Your hands were knotted in his hair, tugging on the ends, causing a low moan to escape from him. What better way to end the evening, then to stick your tongue down Adams throat.

Continuing your motions, you untied the silk kimono robe. Pulling away so you could toss the clothing away, you didn’t see Adam look at you hungerily. His hands that were resting on your hips, traveled upward to cup your breasts in his hands. The sudden movement, enciting a moan to fall from your lips.

He eagerly, wrapped his arms around your butt, so he could stand with you in his arms. This time, he had his tongue down your throat.

“You’re right Adam,” you panted, “You should make me jealous more often.”

Not bothering to opening his eyes, his groggy morning voice broke the silence, “Good morning, beautiful.”

“Good morning, handsome.” Giving him a smile, even though his eyes were still closed.

Sighing, you said, “We should get dressed, so we can be on set.”

Groaning Adam tightened, his grip on your waist, pulling you impossibly closer to him. 

“Baby. Five more minutes, please?”

You and Adam, have been dating for only a few minutes, it was fairly new still. Not wanting to go public with your relationship just yet, it was a mutual agreement to keep it a secret. 

Adam had gotten a part in the ‘What If,’ movie, co-starring opposite, Daniel Radcliffe. You were close friends with both men, long before the movie was able to be produced. Once the movie was accepted, Daniel immediately, asked the casting directors if you could be in the movie as well. Daniel, introduced you to Adam, before filming began. Nobody, not even the cast or crew knew that you were dating Adam. Today, was the day that the sex scene would be filmed, between you and Adam.

After you both arrived on set, it was a few hours before either of you saw each other again. You spent an hour in hair and makeup, one of your close friends was one of the hair and makeup artists. This caused you to spend time together goofing off, catching up from the weekend, typical things that you both did whenever you had gotten hair and makeup. Next, was when you had to get into your costume, it didn’t take that much time to get into your clothes for the scene.

Adam and Daniel, had already been filming for the past few hours that you were getting ready. You were feeling, a little bit intimidated since, you were working with acting veterans who could nail the scene in one try. Being fairly, new to the acting scene, made you hesitate. 

Situating yourself to sit in Adams lap, your attention was focused on the directors and production team, on the side of the set. 

A large hand, moved your hair off of your shoulder tucking it behind your ear. His warm breath fanned over your ear. His one of his hands was clapped down on your thigh holding you in place, while the other was resting lowly on your hip. 

“And.... Action!” The director yelled.

Snapping your attention to Adam, he looked at you with wide eyes, not expecting your reaction. Crashing your lips onto his, a low moan was elicited from the man under you. The passion you had for each other, caused everything else fall away. Opening your mouth, he shoved his tongue into your mouth, making you moan in return. His lips, began kissing down your jaw to your neck feverishly, placing kisses all around your neck. Grabbing his jaw, you pulled his mouth back to yours. Your fingers, were running through his black thick hair.

“Cut!”

“Y/N! Adam!” The director got up from his chair, clapping his hands as he made his way over to you both, “That was amazing! Great job!”

Both of you, were panting out of breath from being able to show affection for each other, forgetting where you were. Daniel, shot you and Adam a curious look, but didn’t bother saying anything. Reluctantly, you pulled yourself off of Adams lap, making your way back to your trailer. There wasn’t anymore scenes for that day that you would need to be present for.

__________________________________________________________

The cast members, were doing interviews about the movie, doing press meet and greets. The most often question was for you and Adam. “Was it hard feeling, the scene?” or “Y/N, it looks like you and Adam, had real chemistry during the movie!”

Both of you tried your best to avoid ousting your relationship during the interviews, especially since the interviewers had been grilling you guys.

“Y/N.” Adam started from the other room, putting the finishing touch on his suit, “I don’t want to hide anymore.” 

Looking at him, you were struggling with the zipper of your dress.

“Turn around babe. Let me help.”

Following his instructions, you turned around. 

_________________________________________________________

Both you and Adam arrived at the red carpet. You hadn’t given him an answer from the conversation earlier, that night. Adam, was keeping his distance from you on the red carpet.

Deciding that you agreed with him, you made your way to him. He attention was on the interviewer, answering her question, he hadn’t heard you walk up to him. 

“Well I think -mph.”

He was cut off once you, took a hold of his jaw, turning his head towards you, planting your lips on his, kissing him. He was stunned for a few seconds before he responded, placing his hands on your hip, briefly, deepening the kiss. Once again, Adam had taken over your senses, not noticing where you were, or what you were doing.

“Are you getting this?”

Suddenly, you pulled away from Adam, earning a whimper from the towering muscular man above you. He had followed you, as you tried pulling away, bringing his lips back to yours keeping contact with them.

The sound of someone clearing their throat finally got Adams attention. Pulling back from you, he rested his forehead against yours. 

“No going back.” You whispered, grinning from ear to ear.

“Dude! There is absolutely Elena should’ve ended up with Stefan!” Jessica huffed out in annoyance. 

“Dude!” Adam’s tone mocking Jessica’s, “Why should she end up with Damon! Stefan is better for her.”

The day had only just begun, and you were already getting a head ache. Pinching the bridge of your nose, sighing in frustration before you interjected, “Guys! Can we not do this today? The last time you two argued about the Vampire Diaries, neither of you spoke to each other for three weeks!”

Both of their heads snapping towards you.

“It wasn’t my fault!” they both replied in unison.

“I don’t care whose fault it is, I’m ending it.” You replied sassily, making your way over to the coffee pot, before Jessica said, “Someone’s crabby this morning.”

“Gee. I wonder why that is. One of my best friends banged on my door to wake up rather than waking me up like a civil human being, while the other,” you turned to glare at Adam, before continuing, “decided to strike up the age old Vampire Diaries argument.”

“You’re not wrong.” “Yeah, sorry.” They both apologized at the same time. 

“Now, please tell me why, both of you are here on my weekend off.”

“That’s why were here, to pppaaarrrttyyyyyyy!” Jessica said in her best Kristen Wiig voice. 

“You’ve seen Bridesmaids way too much.”

“It’s a life style. Don’t judge.” 

Putting your hands up in surrender, she busted with laughter. 

“Alright, peace out Bitches.”

Both you and Adam looked at each other in confusion.

“Some of us,” she started, as she made her way to collect her purse, “have to work on Fridays. Y/N, I’ll see you tonight for Girls Night. Bye, Adam.” With that Jessica, left your apartment.

“So....” you say awkwardly, rocking back and forth on your feet.

“So...” Adam said awkwardly.

Realizing you were still in your pajamas you said, “I’m gonna go, get dressed. It’s your pick today.”

“YES!” Adam maneuvered his way to the couch and made himself confortable.

Chuckling you left the kitchen. Adam was your best friend, but you also had feelings for him. He was practically your dream guy but made into reality.

Adam was an excellent actor. He was the most humble Hollywood actor you’ve ever met regardless, of him being the only actor you’ve ever met and became friends with. His successes made you over the moon. Jessica was always trying to tell you that Adam shared your feelings, but you always rejected her opinion the subject. She was your best friend and she didn’t want you to get hurt.

While you were changing, you suddenly thought of how weird Adam was being lately. Normally, he had coffee every day in a to go cup from the small mom and pop coffee shop that was down the street. The last few weeks, he’s been having coffee at your apartment or not at all.

Shoving the thought from your mind, you made your way to sit on the couch next to Adam.

“Hey.” He said a smile.

“Hey, yourself.” You replied softly.

Adam decided on Bobs Burgers, knowing that it was a favorite of yours. It didn’t take long, before you noticed his actions. He had begun leaning towards, which caused him to fulling lean on you, with his shoulder touching yours. Not wanting him to move, you didn’t say anything while smiling to yourself.

About two hours later, and a plethora of different positions on the couch, you finally settled with bunch your legs up leaning against Adams thigh. His right arm, was lazily draping over your legs. Neither of you said anything in fear of the other moving.

You weren’t sure when, but hours later you and Adam had cuddled up on the couch. He was laying behind you fast asleep, spooning you from behind with his face nuzzling your ear. Your heads resting on your extended arms, opening your eyes you saw your fingers intertwined with each other.

Suddenly, Jessica bursted through the door startling you. Adam, was still sound asleep.

“Y/N!” She whisper yelled, “he does like you!”

“Jessica!” You hissed in annoyance, “now is not the time!”

Eventually, Adam woke up and decided he should leave. Jessica kept pestering you, about how he didn’t want to leave.

After you both got ready for your ‘Girls Night’, Jessica was overwhelmed with excitement. She had been trying to get you to go out with her for week. Apparently, there was a new up and coming bar she wanted you to try out.

It was well into the night, and you were beyond Tipsy. Suddenly, Adam showed up at the bar.

“Adam!” You squealed over the music, leaping at him. Thankfully he caught you, causing you to wrap your legs around his waist.

He was chuckling that you were drunk and beyond thrilled to see him, “Nice to see you too, Y/N.”

“Let’s get you home, yeah?”

“What about Jessica?”

“I’ll have the bartender make sure she gets a cab.”

“Okay.” You replied placing a kiss on his cheek before he put you down.

Adam was able to get you up the stairs, with minimal stumbling on your part. He considered this to be a small victory.

Leading you to your bedroom, he asked, “Do you think you can change by yourself?”

“Yeah, I’m an adult!”

Laughing at your humor even though you were drunk, he left the room so you could change. After a few minutes went by, he knocked on the door before entering. You were already, crawling into bed.

“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Uh,” he started awkwardly, “that’s my shirt.”

“Oh,” you left out softly looking down at it, “Sorry, I, Uh, could take it off if you wa-“

Before you knew it, he had your head in his hands, moving you to look up at him, while you were still on your knees. He rested his forehead against yours, your breaths mixing with one another. Your hands traveling up to grip his wrists desperate for his touch. Ever so slowly, he inched his face closer to yours, lips barely touching yours. They felt like velvet, with warmth radiating off of them. Kissing him, felt like everything you’ve ever imagined.

Pulling away from the soft kiss, you moved so you were under the blankets, pulling Adam with you.

“I’ve waited so long for his,” he said while cupping your cheek in his hand, “I thought you didn’t want me.” He finally said while, placing a gentle kiss on your lips.

“I’ve only wanted you Adam,” you murmured softly, “it’s always been you. I’m hopelessly in love with you.”

“I’m in love with you too, Y/N. You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to hear you say that.”

Adam began kissing you again, it wasn’t until his tongue was exploring your mouth that he tasted the alcohol, remembering that he had picked you up from the bar only hours ago.

Pulling back slightly from the kiss, earning a whine from you, he began, “If you remember this tomorrow, and that’s a big if, we can talk about this..” sadness was evident in his voice.

The next morning, you woke up to a cold bed. Moving your arm next to you, to search for Adam, you were met with nothing but an empty space.

Groaning, you sat up in bed and looked over to the previously occupied spot. It was barely warm, which meant he hadn’t been up much longer before you. Suddenly, the smell of coffee brewing filled the air. You moved the blankets, to retreat from bed.

Adam was sitting on the couch in the living room, watching a nature documentary before you entered.

“Hey, you’re aw-mph”

You cut him off placing your lips over his, knowing he had widened eyes, you placed yourself in his lap wrapping and arm around his shoulder, while your other hand was tangeling itself into his long dark hair. Biting his bottom lip, he moaned at the sudden sensation, bringing his hands to grip your hips, pulling you closer to him. Opening his mouth, he allowed your tongue to search his mouth. Your senses were overtaken by his sent, with each inhale you could smell his soap, his shampoo, his shaving cream. It was the most delicious smell. His tongue, was gentle yet demanding. The longer we kissed, the more the world fell away, leaving just the two of us entangled in each other.

Pulling the appendage from his throat, you both were out of breath.

“We need to talk about last night,” you panted out.

“Yes,” he planted in agreement, “We do.. Would you like to go on a date sometime?”

“I’m not busy tonight,” you replied

“Great. It’s a date.”

Your friends began playfully debating what Kylo Ren, looks like under his mask. Your small group quickly became the loudest in the cafeteria.

Jake gently nudged your shoulder. "I bet you're glad, you're having lunch with us now." He chuckled.

You giggled nodding in response. "I've missed this."

"I bet," Jake nodded. "We've missed you being with us."

A tap on your shoulder quickly disrupted your thoughts. "Ms. Y/L/N, you're needed in the bridge."  The stormtrooper left as quickly as he came.

Sighing you glance at your friends with sorrow. "I'm sorry, I have to go."

Your friends quickly responded with "It's okay," and "We understand."

Nodding you quickly made your way to the bridge.

"Where have you been!" Hux exclaimed.

"It was my lunch?" You tilted your head.

"There's so much to be done!" He continued. Shoving a stack of paperwork at you, he smirked. "Get to work!"

---------------------------

Hours had gone by as you worked. It was late into the night before you even glanced at the time. Sighing you shook your head. Hux was always trying to take his anger out on you, trying to make you look incompetent in front of the other officers.

Heavy footsteps echoed through the bridge, signalling you weren't alone.

"Y/N?" A husky voice questioned.

Furrowing your eyebrows in confusion, you turned toward the voice. Shock quickly danced along your face.

Kylo Ren.

He was still in his robes, but without his mask.

"S-Supreme L-Leader?" You stuttered. Heat rose in your cheeks as you mentally kicked yourself.

"What're you doing here? Your shift was over hours ago." He stated.

Frowning, you nodded. "General Hux gave me paperwork to do."

"Ah."

Nodding you turned back around continuing your work. The chair next to you was pulled out, before a black blur moved quickly, occupying the space beside you.

Glancing at Kylo with confusion, you questioned him. "What're you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing?" His voice was harsh.

Flinching slightly, silence fell between you as you quickly brought your attention back to your work.

Moments passed before he broke the silence.

"Sorry."

You nodded in response, not taking your attention off of your work. Kylo sat beside you quietly, observing you. Before you knew it, you were both passed out sleeping on the desk.

------------------

"Do we wake them?" A voice questioned.

"I don't know." Another voice responded. "I don't wanna be the one to wake the supreme leader."

"We could just pretend we didn't see them?"

"How? We literally work two feet away."

"Want to go get coffee?"

"Is that even a question?"

------------------

"Y/N!" Hux's voice boomed, causing your eyes to fly open. "What do you think you're doing!"

You had fallen asleep beside, Kylo Ren at your desk. Your head was resting on your arm that was touching Kylo's. He mirrored your position. His chocolate eyes flew open, boring into Y/E/C in confusion.

Groaning, you lifted your head gazing at Hux over your shoulder. "I-"

"Remove yourself from the Supreme Leader." He spat in a stern voice, grabbing your bicep yanking you toward him. "Leave. You've already embarrassed us enough today."

Frowning, you scurried out of the bridge to your corridors.

------------------

Laying beneath your blankets, you were watching your favorite show. Hux was still punishing you for your slip up with the Supreme Leader the other day. You had been on leave for the past three days. It began feeling weird that you weren't working or being smothered with work.

The sound of a firm knock on your door pulled you from your thoughts. Slightly groaning, you threw the covers off.

Opening the door, you were shocked to see Kylo Ren standing before you. Your mouth fell open slightly, as you gawked at him.

"Hello, Y/N." He spoke through his mask.

"Supreme Leader." You greeted, nodding. "Do...Do you...want to come in?" You hesitated.

Nodding slightly, you stepped aside, allowing him entry.

You both were standing in the middle of your room, standing awkwardly in silence. The hissing sound of Kylo taking his mask off replaced the silence.

A sudden burst of confidence, you crawled under your blankets gazing at Kylo expectantly.

"Wha-"

"Are you going to join me or what?"

Fear danced along Kylo's expression for a spit second, before it was gone.

"But-"

"No, buts."

Toeing off his shoes and cape, he joined you beneath the blankets. Both of you watching what you had on previously. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Kylo sneaking glances at you occasionally. Whenever you turned to look at him, he would quickly revert his gaze.

------------------

Since that night, your relationship with Kylo had advanced. He had been spending more and more time with you.

Kylo had begun spending more time with you in your corridors than his. Half of his clothes were in your room, scattered about.

Waking up, Kylo wanted to talk to you through the force.

"Y/N." His groggy voice echoed.

You groaned in response.

"Are you awake?"

"I am now." You snapped opening one eye, gazing at Kylo.

"Can I come over?"

"Since when do you ask?" You teased, turning on your face facing the wall.

The door to your room opened, as the sound of heavy steps sounded. The bed dipped as the covers were lifted. Warmth radiated from the body next to you. His even breathing, lulling you to sleep. Absentmindedly, you turned around so you were face to face. Moving closer to him, you were closer than you've been before.

Groggily, you sat up slightly placing a soft kiss on Kylo's lips.

"Goodnight, Kylo." You say voice filled with sleep, as you snuggled into his chest.

The man standing before you had years of experience on you. Some would say, that you were being naive to think you could even stand a chance against him. Others, would say you were brave to defend your friend. But one thing is for sure, whatever you were, you were going to be a good one.

In that moment, standing face to face, you decided that you were going to give him a hell of a fight. His black ‘Supreme Leader’ mask, had been long gone due to the previous fight he had been in with Finn. Regardless, of the connection you two shared, you weren’t just going to leave Finn to fend for himself. 

Raising your gaze, from your unconscious friend on the ground, you were met with a pair of softened eyes. ‘Why is he looking at me like that?’ ‘Does he not see my that I’m ready to fight him?’ you had thought. A violent shiver, brought you out of your thoughts. You hadn’t realized that, it had begun to snow a lot more, since you left the rebel base.

The cracking sound of shattered glass filled the air, bringing your eyes to meet a hazel pair. As far as you could see, there was a smooth scar on his face, that spread from the top of his right eyebrow dragging to the bottom of his jaw. He had seemingly, let his guard down. His red lightsaber, was lowered down, dragging on the right side, behind his body with each step he took. 

Raising your lightsaber, you swung with all the strength you could muster up.

Vrummmummmmm FVISH!

Sparks were flying everywhere from the lightsaber impact.

Your chest was tight, and your breathing had become short. 

The impact hadn’t even made him flinch. His reflexes, were fast upon seeing you swing at him. He blocked the strike almost as soon as you had raised your weapon.

You made a mental note, to thank Poe and Finn later, for the practice fights you had done.

Panting, you glanced to see check on your friend. 

‘How am I going to get over to him?’ You were willing your friend, to wake up.

Vrummmummmmm

The sound of the connected lightsabors brought you back to the fight you were currently in. Red light of Kylo’s lightsaber illuminated his face, purple light had illuminated yours. He made no move to disconnect them. Remembering, that you were connected with the force, you quickly closed your eyes. You had never attempted to use for the force before --- aside from the force connecting you to Kylo Ren. 

“Y/N! Finn!”

Your eyes flew open, as you recognized whose voice called for you. ‘Oh no’ you thought. The frantic sound of crunching glass, filled the air. 

Vrummmummmmm

The sound of another lightsaber, could be heard. Suddenly, orange and yellow could be seen from your peripheral vision. You didn’t need, to turn to see who had came in aid. ‘What is he doing here?’ you thought for a split second. Shaking the thought from your head, you didn’t really care why he was there. 

Pushing your connected lightsabers forward with all your strength, you twirled out of the way, lightsaber still in the air. 

FVISH!  Kwishuuuuuuuuuu!

Filled the air. Your sudden movement, had caught Kylo Ren off guard, causing him to take a step back.

Poe took over your previous position, flinching slightly not expecting the sudden loudness. 

Deactivating your lightsaber, you ran over to Finn, you crouched down by where he lay. You let out a content sigh, as you checked his pulse. 

“Don’t worry Finn. I’m here now.” you untangled, your medical bag, throwing it down next to, before opening it and searching for gauze and rubbing alcohol. A feather light groan could be heard. ‘Save your strength, you’re going to need it.’ you thought guiltily. 

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