#about ginger

First of all, the return of the host era. Since our latest System (Re)Discovery in 2022, we haven't had a singular consistent host. We had groups of frequent fronters that cycled between themselves, but beyond that no single alter was really fronting any significantly more than any other. Since starting my new job and since my new partner has moved in with us, though, I've noticed that the Mint version of myself has been more and more present, which is particularly interesting to note as I'm... usually only made to front in emergencies, and thus rarely fronted in the past. To say that I'm surprised that I'm starting to have such a significant presence in my life is really understating how I feel about the whole thing, though maybe you could say that it's an overstatement as I also don't really feel much. Ah dissociation, my old friend.

Speaking of, we've recently started going a lot deeper into a lot of our EMDR work, and I've noticed that I'm consistently more fragmented and dissociated these days, often needing my partners to help ground me throughout the week or otherwise retreating into my room to take care of myself. I'm taking a break from it all this week as I'm on vacation, but it's definitely something to keep in mind for myself. My memory has been all over the place and so has my emotional regulation.

And because I'm somehow the host now, I know that's affected a lot of my online presence. I'm... not a very sociable alter, even less so when I'm not as integrated with the parts of me who do enjoy or are good at socializing, like Green or Purple or Ginger. I've been fairly quiet on all the social media I'm on including here on Tumblr and also the various Discord communities I'm in. At work, I'm much quieter than I'm used to myself being. Even when I talk to my parents I'm just... reserved and quiet, as opposed to argumentative or excitable. It feels almost alien to see "Reimei" acting like this so much because I'm so used to thinking of "Reimei" as a bubbly, friendly, quirky person. Not... whatever I am.

I guess at the end of the day I'm also Reimei, but my perception of myself is so different from how I actually present myself these days that it feels jarring to re-examine who "I" am. I mean, I know who I am, as a part. But I never really considered what that meant when it came to who I-as-Reimei am. And though these two things may sound similar, they're... kind of not at the same time? Mint keeps to himself. Reimei loves attention. Mint is just the version of Reimei you see when Reimei is tired and needs alone time. Reimei... regularly needs alone time? Reimei isn't as sociable as I thought I am? It's strange to think about, I guess, and hard to wrap my mind around fully.

on a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now? solid 6, i am excited to live in norway for 5 months.

describe yourself in a hashtag? #wellshitok

if you could do a love scene with anyone, who would it be? timothee chalamet if it's a film that has the vibe of cmybn, but tom holland if it's a movie that is mainstream.

if your life was a musical, what would the marquee say? probably something like "don't worry!"

what’s one thing people don’t know about you? people don't know that i sleep with a baby blanket named blankey who is actually not a blanket i have had since i was a baby but actually the same type of blanket i had when i was 5. this is the third blanket i have had since then, she (yes she uses she/her pronouns) is from lands end (i buy a new one whenever she turns to literal threads). i got the one i sleep with now when i was 15.

what’s your wake up ritual? i don't really have one unless i'm like at camp or have class, then i will read in bed for a bit if i can, shower, drink a tea and eat breakfast, and brush my teeth last. i also like to listen to music.

what’s your go to bed ritual? i always wash my face and either shower or have a bath, then do skincare, take out contacts, brush teeth, put on lip balm, read in bed, then sleep.

what’s your favorite time of day? i love when the sun is setting.

your go to for having a good laugh? tiktok, or sonny with a chance or kim possible compilations.

dream country to visit? iceland or new zealand

what’s the biggest surprise you’ve ever had? that my dad who is slightly homophobic is actually into kinky gay sex and is a bottom.

heels or flats/sneakers? sneakers.

vintage or new? depends, i would say new for clothes because they don't make cute vintage clothes for fat women, but i love vintage cameras and furniture

who do you want to write your obituary? my best friend katie and if i die before her, my mom.

style icon? fictional? noora amelie sætre. irl? i love zendaya's style for the most part.

what are three things you cannot live without? my phone, my antidepressants, and something to read.

what’s one ingredient you put in everything? GARLIC but also love salt and pepper. i am very white.

what 3 people living or dead would you want to make dinner for? ummmm maybe like my grandma who i never met and or like isak valtersen, sana bakkoush and even bech næsheim from skam lmao.

what’s your biggest fear in life? feeling like my life is meaningless and i won't be rememebered.

window or aisle seat? used to be window, now it's aisle. i gotta pee!!

what’s your current tv obsession? haven't been watching tv AT ALL but i loved moon knight.

favorite app? tumblr or ao3 if that counts as an app, more of a website tho

secret talent? i am very flexible, and can do all three splits, and a perfect cartwheel.

most adventurous thing you’ve ever done in your life? i dated a girl in high school in a small town in the deep south

how would you define yourself in three words? determined, honest, lonely

favorite piece of clothing you own? rn it's a plain ribbed t-shirt from target

a must have clothing item that everyone should have? plain ribbed shirt and comfy high rise jeans

a superpower you would want? shape shifting

what’s inspiring you in life right now? to be transparent, i am simply existing for the most part. i do really want to graduate so i can move to nyc and try acting and not be in school for the first time in 15 years.

best piece of advice you’ve received? that it is okay to feel and show your emotions and that doesn't make you any less strong or capable.

best advice you’d give your teenage self? you won't feel this awful forever. i promise. also, don't let her hurt you over and over again. and lastly, just because you are in pain doesn't mean you have to force your anger and sadness and despair onto others, be kind.

a book everyone should read? i don't read as much as i used to, but i think a book/series that made me who i am is a series of unfortunate events by lemony snicket.

what would you like to be remembered for? i hope i'm remembered as someone who left the world better than it was in some way shape or form, even if it's trivial.

how do you define beauty? i think it depends on the person and what kind of beauty. i think there is no simple way to define beauty because it's so subjective.

what do you love most about your body? my eyes, they are a really pretty shade of blue with a gold ring around the pupil.

best way to take a rest/decompress? listen to music, read, lay in the pitch dark listening to music or city rain sounds

favorite place to view art? gonna be transparent i cannot look at art for more than like 30 seconds, so maybe a museum but i don't really view art :/

if your life was a song, what would the title be? liability by lorde.

if you could master one instrument, what would it be? piano, i played it growing up but stopped.

if you had a tattoo, where would it be? probably somewhere pretty hidden, maybe my ankle or the side of ribs?? idk

dolphins or koalas? koalas literally fuck dolphins

what’s your spirit animal? a platypus.

best gift you’ve ever received? probably my macbook, i use it a lot. idk i've never been given a super sentimental gift?? my friend recently gave me a really pretty drawing of me for my birthday though.

best gift you’ve given? horrible at gifts but got my dad a fancy speaker for christmas but little does he know it was 75% off.

what’s your favorite board game? don't really play them at all and never really have but i like chess

what’s your favorite color? baby pink

least favorite color? any bright colour. or like orange. or teal. i am picky.

diamond or pearls? pearls!!!

drugstore makeup or designer? mostly designer but the occasional drugstore product

blow-dry or air-dry? air-dry unless someone else is doing my hair

pilates or yoga? yoga

coffee or tea? tea, but if i need caffeine, coffee.

what’s the weirdest word in the english language? hippomonstrosesquippiedaliophobia.

dark chocolate or milk chocolate? milk but i'm not a huge chocolate gal

stairs or elevators? elevators

summer or winter? winter 4ever i hate sweating

you are stuck on an island, you can pick one food to eat forever without getting tired of it, what would you eat? probably something nutritious if we are being practical like salmon and quinoa but if we are being honest, steak and yorkshire pudding

a dessert you don’t like? super chocolatey stuff. or ice cream that is fruit flavoured. disgusting.

a skill you’re working on mastering?

best thing to happen to you today? the children went home and i get to drink tonight

worst thing to happen to you today? woke up at 7.30 am and had to spend time with children until they finally left at 12 pm

best compliment you’ve ever received? that i am determined and resilent.

favorite smell? christmas eve candle by yankee candle. smells like childhood.

hugs or kisses?

if you made a documentary, would it be about? a documentary about how internet culture and grooming affected girls born in the late 90's-early 2000's, like myself and so many of my friends did some crazy shit online as a kid.

last piece of content you consumed that made you cry?

lipstick or lipgloss? lipgloss!!

sweet or savory? savoury but i also love sweets

girl crush? zendaya, maybe margot robbie?? josefine frida pettersen is gorgeous

how do you know your in love? when you never get tired of being around them. like your social battery never runs out with them.

a song you can listen to on repeat? currently kjøre oss by marie ulven (girl in red before she was girl in red)

if you could switch lives with someone for a day, who would it be? probably a rich person who lives in nyc or canada or norway

what are you most excited for about this time in your life? moving to oslo in the fall!!

tagged by @silkscream

(also I haaaaaate not being able to use our Actual Names and use my nickname for Crimsy online, but it is what it isssss)

also p sure our body is now too Old to handle my hyperactive forever 12 ADHD energy which SUCKS ughhhh whyyyyyyy I just wanna do things and hang out with people and talk to people but noooooo I'm "tired" and my friends and partners are all "busy" or "asleep" or "getting ready for bed" >:( HMPH maybe yall just cant handle my fabulosity *hairflips*

and also maybe maybe MAYBE the others in my brain are telling me to also go to bed and stop bothering people fjajfbsnghd

NO I will be AWAKE and HYPER and do my own shit YOU CANT STOP ME MUAHAHAHAHAHA

perfume: if you could make your own signature fragrance, what would it smell like?

i want it to smell like a fancy elevated version of an abercrombie and fitch store. my toxic trait is that i think that store smells so amazing, despite going in there like twice in my entire life

wine: what kind of drunk are you (happy/affectionate, angry, sad, fun/wild)? if you don’t drink, what kind do you think you WOULD be?

i was so obsessed with it that i made my mom take the book to work so she could use the copy machine to make copies of the paintings in the book for me to hang on my wall

but wait

it gets weirder

there was this one painting in the book that i saw and thought “i should recreate this with my barbie”

so i took a barbie, made her a dress out of tissues and a hair tie, and tied her to the leg of my nightstand with some yarn 💀

(P.S. Hope you're having a good day!)

hi!! i’m having a good day (now night now that i’m in norway haha hope you are having a good day!)

1.) Do you have freckles?

yes, many many freckles. genuinely don’t think there is a part of my body that doesn’t have a freckle on it haha

34.) prev answer was baby’s breath!!

38.) Do you have any phobias?