#aaronbassoon

I think about that all the time. Because I don’t think I miss anyone in the middle of the day. I certainly miss everyone in the middle of the night though. It’s actually 2 AM right now and I miss Joe. I don’t even feel like I have the right to miss Joe. But why do I need someone’s permission to miss someone? I also really want to talk to MattnotRyan. But I don’t know what about. I want to talk to him in the middle of the day too, though. I think I just want Matt to be my pal because I think he is way rad. He has such a great smile and I just want to be a cause for it. I want to make him smile.

That’s always been a goal of mine. If you look at Jenn’s twitter, there’s a post from a million years ago that is a quote from me - “I want to make people funny. wait no. I want to make people laugh at my funny.” which is so true. I’ve always thought of myself as a somewhat humorous person, and I just want to make people happy and smile, because seeing people smile is the only thing that matters. Happy people are just the best. As I said once - bearded fellows are so my weakness, but so are happy people. I think I would do a lot of things just to make people happy. Like get out of their lives.

Rant about people mostly..

For marching band, we just run on to the field. In the Queen show, we were in a scatter, so no one was behind me. In this show, I’m the line leader. AaronBassoon plays clarinet in marching band, and stands right behind me. He kept telling me to run faster because he was going to get me! I got so anxious even though I know he wouldn’t run me over.

I was telling Rachel about how last week I was very certain that MattnotRyan and I were friends. But this week I was not sure at all. Last week he would instantly say hello when he saw me. This week he definitely seemed a little not so friendly. Earlier today he did say hi at the same time I said hi to him, so that’s good. But yesterday he definitely ignored me a little. He has the best smile and is so handsome when he’s happy. As are most people.

Joe is the best. He is one of my favorite people. Rachel said that last year he didn’t talk at all, but this year he actually talks and stuff. I think it’s because of James ( they went to highschool together and were friends then, as well.), but also because of me. 

I was sitting in the ILC earlier, and some people came by (that I knew) and asked if the would sit with me, and my answer was “I  guess” and I didn’t realize how much I need that empty alone time. I’m not lonely, just alone. I enjoy it. Ben was gone from class on Monday, and wow class was horrible. It was weird and quiet and lonely. I felt less happy about math and wow how can I be so dependent on people.