AIO My [40F] bf [52M] accidentally sent me these texts one week after getting back together from a three month break up
My \[40F\] boyfriend \[52M\] accidentally responded to me when he meant these text messages for someone else. The first two are from Tuesday. The last one is from Wednesday. Both times he called me almost instantly after sending them when he realized his mistake.
We had been broken up for 3 months and I was giving him a small chance again. We met up for the first time a week ago. We have been off and on for a year.
He said it was the messages were meant for his ex wife and she lives on the other side of the country. He also said he hasn't seen her in 2 years. The woman's name in the text isn't one he's ever mentioned before, but I don't know if he's ever mentioned his ex wife's name.
But the texts feel like this is someone local and very recent. The past week he has been telling me how much he loves me and has kept saying we're in a relationship when I've not been ready to move so fast. He's also pressuring me for sex and I don't want to esp now. Today he acted like those text messages never happened and had a talk with me, basically him talking at me, about how I hurt him by not sleeping with him and by not talking to him for three months.
Anyway, my question is, AIO or is this just a sign to fully breakup with him? He didn't handle the last three months well at all. I feel like asking him if he hasn't seen his ex in two years why is he saying he's "going back to his hand" and is he going to sex clubs. But I imagine he'll just lie if I ask.
Edit: I hear you all loud and clear. I'm going to cut him off and never look back. Also stay single and get my self respect in order. I definitely allowed this person into my life and I am beyond grossed out by him, how he's treated me in the past and now a clear sign how he treats others, especially women.
Reddit consensus: NOT OVERREACTING (NOR) (97% confidence)
Top comment: “NOR. Just end it for good and block him. He’s not worth your time.”
Notable explanation: “NOR.
Either "BF" spent part of the last 3 months fucking someone else and got bent out of shape that their arrangement wasn't exclusive, or he'd been wanting to/trying to fuck someone else and she ultimately chose someone else... so he's "going back to his hand." The text recipient clearly isn't his long-distance ex wife.
This man is seeking sex first and foremost. He's lying about there being "no pressure" for sex and he's lying about who those texts were intended for. He's given evidence that he's actively tried to guilt at least one other woman into pity-fucking him while he's in the process of running the same type of coercion on you.
Today he acted like those text messages never happened and had a talk with me, basically him talking at me, about how I hurt him by not sleeping with him and by not talking to him for three months.
This is fucking vile, and waaaaay out of pocket for a grown 50+ man. Send this past-expiration fuckboi back to the apps, friend.”
Originally shared by TaoOfAlice on r/AmIOverreacting on July 10th, 2026 at 8:51 AM UTC. Credit to u/anonymouse12222 and u/gobbledygookkk for the quoted comments.
