#5 5

Oh boy! I remember this too. 🖐🖐 Here it is!

a soft sigh left their lips.

“if you all truly wish to see if i can dance, then yes. quickly, though. i have rough, basic knowledge of ballroom dancing.”

they held out a gloved hand.

“due to watching the various party guests dance here, of course.”

This is a thing I want to try where I reflect on 5 less-than-perfect things about the past week (an exercise in letting myself be flawed and vulnerable) and then 5 good things or small victories or things I'm grateful for (to keep it from being a ruminating thing and also to not be throwing negativity around unchecked, which I don't like doing. Anyway, straight into it:

-

I've been unemployed for a while and I'm starting a new job on Monday and it's got me thinking about how maybe I'm an irredeemably dysfunctional person

And like maybe I've actually ruined my life and I'm about to find out

And on a more grounded level maybe it won't work out longterm for reasons beyond my control which would be a disaster bc I'd be back to square one but extra desperate

I'm not like in a spiral of despair or anything, these emotions just kind of bubble up and then I smash them back down like "bitch we have a job, we're going to be happy about it and we're not going to cross that bridge unless we come to it", which frankly idk if that's unhealthy or not

I've been poking at my novel thinking, idk if it's actually good (I mean it's good but is it good, I wrote it a year ago so how could it be ...) and feeling like maybe it's worthless or would need a complete rewrite to be worth anything (which is more doom and gloom than my feedback so far would support, I'm just feeling discouraged about it for some reason)

+

I'M STARTING A NEW JOB ON MONDAY !!! 🎆🍾💵

KH3 came out and I am living, I'm simultaneously reliving my joyous youth and listening to Face My Fears on repeat to catapult me into my bright new future

Idk how to talk about this on here but big good things happened in my mental space this week. My 2019 plan to be a real human again is still alive and kicking and went through a pokemon-style evolution

Queensnight (my new personal name/concept for the Feb 1 holiday) was really nice - approved for future use