#4amthoughts

Pov:

You lie in your bed

it's 4 a.m.

Head in the clouds

thoughts of him

His face is in your dreams

every night and day

He’s in your head

in the sun and in the rain

You close your eyes

feel his touch

You whisper his name

& I ever wonder, do you ever think of me when you look at her/him?

Does your heart beat as strong as it did when we were together?

there are things that i regret,

like things that i didnt do or say.

some things never really leave my head,

like when i used to take your breath away.

He turns his head to the side

Lights the cigarette and a devilish smile

Plays across his face, across the moonlight, and that night we both surrendered a bit of ourselves to that clever moonlight, placing tabs under our tongues like eucharist

Going down paths, happening accidentally on dreams vaguely remembered.

Steam from piss

Rises and we laugh at all of it

Tripping off the sky, soliciting guidance from

No g (odd)

spiralling into our fragmented psychologies...

Winding up at a gas station parking lot

I recalled my little brother's anecdote concerning an ambulance driver who went insane from the substance, homicidal rampage ensued, sweeping across his whole nuclear family. Snapped out of the drug's clutches, he was terrified and turned himself into the police station.

I googled the occurance, skeptical, and sure enough, it didn't exist. Believing such a story? Either an attempt to frighten me, or frighten himself, trying to achieve both, and only achieving one.

A British accent rackets about in my mind for a little bit, and I can't quite understand all the commotion.

Slipping my face from the ground, I can't quite ascertain my surroundings,

Winding through shock and horror

Picking up precisely where I left off

And I no longer have some

Stupid fucking need to write what only makes sense to a select few

I just want to grab you--yes, you!

And show you the sheer hilarity and terror

Of every moment

Just as it is

Fear of the self

Rolling down like egg white on

my skin a scarred scale of purples to reds,

though 'i intend to be independently blue

and i will get better' i'd say to my reflection

planning to place the past on a shelf

but first