Back in Action
Fitting that my last post was about how I'd been negligent on posting and here I am, 7 months later, finally posting again. I have a really good excuse though: premature rupture of membranes. I spontaneously went into labor at 32 weeks and I'm just finally coming up for air and a Tumblr break. Let me preface the rest of this post by saying that I was fortunate to bring a baby home from the hospital. It didn't go as planned, and it was scary as hell, but he's sleeping in his bassinet as I type this snoring his tiny baby snore and it is heaven. I hope to write some retrospective posts detailing the last 10 weeks of my pregnancy, which were a doozy, but I thought it best first to share this part. My little dude, who was scheduled for a Valentine's Day delivery, came rushing into the world on December 22 taking everyone by surprise. My water broke while I was home alone and I drove myself to the hospital in complete denial about what was happening. But, five and a half hours later, I heard the most perfect little cry and fell back in exhaustion for all of two minutes before I had to strap on my armor for my next battle, that of a NICU mama. It wasn't the birth I had pictured, and the weeks that followed weren't anything I could've ever imagined, but looking back now I don't know that I would change a thing. My entire journey to motherhood has been a rollercoaster, and along the way I often found myself wondering, "why me?" But now that I'm here, staring at this almost 6 month old baby, I realize it had to be me. It had to happen the way it did. Everything was building to this moment. Every tear I shed, every set back, every joy and every sorrow were carving me into the person I am right now. The mother to this tiny little dude, the person I've been meant to be all this time. More soon. But first, sleep.
