#30for30challenge

But not in the way a rabbit feels standing next to a wolf

Rather, how an arrow must feel nestled in the crook of a bow

Trusting to be guided in the right direction.

Sent soaring through the air with a sense of freedom

And security in its path

You make me feel small

Like singular raindrops falling into the ocean of you

Like every time I'm in your arms, I am coming home

Like

Home is not a place but a grip

You

Make me

Feel

Small

Like

Like I dont have to be so big

and so strong so much of the time

Like I can be vulnerable,

yet still safe

I often say that I am ridiculously or unnecessarily strong.

But really, that's not the case

I am exactly as strong as I've always had to be

Strong enough to lift bodies from the ground that would rather stay there

Even, if that body was only my own.

"dedicate a poem to your most recent teacher, who changed you with their lessons."

this is not a poem but a free write reflection

mx. sobriety continues to teach me a new lesson every year

a new lesson every heartbreak, every season, every circumstance

sobriety strengthens my discernment

sobriety strengthens boundaries with myself and with others

i protect my sobriety at all costs

emotionally, spiritually, somatically, mentally

if an environment, person, energy, connection makes me feel high, drunk or addicted that is a sign for me to fortify my protection and to keep a distance or cut ties

my sobriety keeps me safe and well

my sobriety keeps me connected and grounded

sober people, energy and environments give me a sense of safety

this is how i know i can trust someone, trust their intentions, trust their ability to show up, trust their actions, trust their Spirit

and if that's not possible, i send love and go along my own way

4.4.23

30 for 30 decolonization through poetry

day 4: “how does your body reflect the lands you come from and the lands you live on today?"

i am the water from the tal-talon (rice fields) my grandparents farmed

the basket woven by my great-grandfather after carving the bangka (canoe)

i come from many earths but i'm probably a cowrie

traveling far from home off the shores of naha

turned pebble in the darkness of the so-called atlantic

shape shifting jellyfish off the coast of the cree-muskogee

who most likely a honu • pag-ong • sea turtle all along

my body is the land is where i like to take naps

resting on my favorite sand then retreating into my shell

riding waves with no timeline or urgency

just a mermaid with many names and callings

30 for 30 decolonization through poetry day 1: “write a poem that tells the world who you are in this very moment.” --

i am wanting

waiting

for the spirit i am becoming

i am tired

of flying into wildfires

only to return with ash

from grieving our star kin

these minuscule crystals sleep in my palm and

must be mixed gingerly into fresh sugar cane water

i pray it is enough

to surface the markings of the chosen ones

tap tap

we

are the ones

i am. among you

here to unearth what we'd almost forgotten

beings from galaxies and oceans beyond

this multiverse cannot fathom

tap tap

download the sunrise into this vessel

ancient melodies breathing light into our temples

remember how water flies freely as song

i am everything and nothing

tap tap

weaving constellations that detonate lava

brighter than the rage of sacrificing our slumber

for the new earth we are building

i am wanting

tap tap

waiting

tap tap

for the love(r)

spirit

warrior