#3.13

i don't know why i'm not a bigger enjoyer of outside pov episodes... but i'm not. i mean i think ghostfacers is a great episode of tv. i like the shaky cam, the found-footage vibes, etc. i just don't find myself craving more outsider pov i guess.

what i do really really like about ghostfacers is that it's the first time we get to hear what is one of the most painful and interesting recurring themes for dean - his disgust and aversion to voyeuristic engagement with his life.

SPRUCE: Earlier, you and Sam -- he said you had two months left? DEAN: Yeah, it's complicated. A while ago, Sam... No. No. No. I'm not gonna whine about my [Bleep] problems to some [Bleep] reality show. I'm gonna do my [Bleep] job.

dean is often accused of not opening up about his emotions. but in this scene he is actually about to explain (at least some of) his situation to spruce - someone he just met, who he is also annoyed with. it's just wild that even given all of that stacked against dean feeling like opening up, he was going to. what stops him is spruce recording him.

i'm also meditating on the concept of a death echo. dean describes it like this:

SPRUCE: What's a death echo? DEAN: Echoes are trapped in a loop, okay? They keep replaying how they died over and over and over again, usually in the place where they were ganked.