Rejecting affection because of their body
𝆹𝅥 Romantic headcanons
𝆹𝅥 Aigis (PERSONA 3), Boothill (HONKAI STAR RAIL), 2B (NIER AUTOMATA), Genos (ONE PUNCH MAN)
Aigis
Aigis has been having troubles with not only her feelings but also her humanity, she was made to fight the shadows and for the longest time she considerate herself only useful for that purpose so the moment she was given the oportunity to live like any other human and being treated as such by the members of SEES she had a hard time to adapt
It took her a while and even some help from you and her friends but she understand that she have fallen in love and start a relationship with you definetly was something completely new, Aigis didn't quite knew what to do but she was willing to help because of this new feelings inside of her
Getting to be physicaly affectionate depends on you, depending on how well you handle it and how much you like it since Aigis is just learning and has pretty much not shame, she knows physical affection is important and way to show care and love but thats also the reason why she was a bit eager to try it, and she had complex feelings for it, liking it but at the same time feeling a little troubled, being so close to you, being directly touching you remind her how diferent your body was from hers, making her curious but also nervous, still it wasn't until your pointed out the diference between you two that Aigis became self-councious
She imediatly let go of you to ask if that was something bad with a sad expression, but even if you try to reasure her that is fine Aigis simply couldn't shake the thought out of her mind, she knew that she was diferent, it is really obvious after all, but does that mean she can't be treaten as a human? can she be considerate a human? and how can she love like other humans when she is far from being a human?
While trying to understand what it is to be human Aigis grew anxious over the diference between you two, avoiding any kind of contact because she's now worried that she may not be the best for you, or at least not the best to give this kind of affectionate, worried that it may be uncomfortable or even that you may end up injured by accident
Aigis need reasurance and patience, its not that this have made her suddently feel really bad is just that it had made her more confused with trying to understand the humans, but with some guidence and care Aigis will slowly accept the fact that, even if you two are diferente that doesn't make her less deserving of love and care nor make you love her less (she will end up being really flustered but will also make her incredibly happy, something that she doesn't quite understand but she just decide to accept it)
Boothill
Boothill doesn't really feels complexed because of his robotic body, he already is used to it and to live with it and since it helps him with with his duty and his seek for his revenge he doesn't complain about it, however for him this body also represents everything that he have lost so it pains him to some extent
Even when you two are already in a relationship he didn't thought much on his body for a long time, after all you two went at your own rythm and way, it wasn't until you two actually started your relationship when he started to be quite self-councious of his body, after all not only he couldn't exactly feel you there is also a contrast with the coldness of his body and the warm of yours
Once he become aware of the diference is something that got stuck on his mind for quite a while, unable to get the thought our of his mind and also becoming incredibly self-councious, almost scared of letting you touch him since he knows there will only be disapointment (he just belives you won't think good of how cold and hard his body is, even if you say that you don't mind it simply stuck in his mind)
For a while Boothill is able to avoid having to explain himself well, finding other ways to express how much he loves you without having to touch you or avoiding letting you touch him and saying a playful excuse, changing the topic with a playful smile so you stop and you won't ask
Boothill keeps it that way for the longest time, avoiding as much as posible to explain how much it actually affects him, how much it reminds him that he is no longer human and how it terrifies him that you may not feel like is enough, that you may prefer to find love in someone who can hug you without a rigid metalic body, who can share the warth in a hug (still, he won't blame you), honestly he is quite blinded by his own sorrow for everything that he have lost that he just can't think out of the idea that his body may be disapointming and uncomfortable for you, fearing that one day you will confirm it
Boothill doesn't want to admit it but if he has to he will do it, he will speak his heart out and despite feeling embarrassed you can see the true anxiety on him because of this, he loves you, he loves that he has you in his life, he loves that there is someone waiting for him and he is scared of losing it, he needs reasurance, he needs to heard from you that you won't leave
Boothill may accept it pretty quick and even joke about it a little but deep down the fear won't cease so easily, it will take him time and even when he is accepting physical affection again he still tense up before relaxing under your touch from time to time, he still stares at you a little as if trying to make sure you are still here, he still quietly hopes that you won't leave his side
2B
As a special YoRHa unit 2B has dedicate herself to the battle and her duty, no matter how curious she can be of the world or the undenying feelings that she has 2B still tries to remind as profesional as posible, even when she have end up in a relasionship with the human she has found during her work and swear to protect
2B struggle quite a lot with feelings and relating to others (specially you) because of the little she knows about life, she finds herself feeling insecure and anxious when it comes to you because she doesn't know what to do or even how to express her feelings, not matter how much you reasure her that is fine she still is too nervous
At the end 2B end up putting some physical distance to you and rarely accepts any physical affection because from one side you are a human, is her duty as a YoRHa unit and your girlfriend to protect you, you hold more importance than you can imagine for this world and for her, and, in the other side, she is an android, her body is build to be in the battlefield, in comparation of your soft and warm body hers is harsh and cold, she can feel the warmth of your body whenever you are close and, as much as she like it (since it means you are alive and you are here), she feels complexed that she can't provide you with that same warmth
2B has a hard time letting her guard down enough and open up to you because she is too nervous that it may end up putting an awkward distance between you two, even if you are already together that just makes 2B even more nervous because she can't deny her feelings now but she is still scared that she may end up hurting you one way or another, but with enough patient or insistance she will slowly grow used to it
Even when 2B start to feel more comfortable to just let herself enjoy and feel she still will keep some respetable distance to respect your personal space and whenever you two are out of the resistance camp because she need to be ready to fight and protect you from anything and everything, again, it is needed to have patience with 2B, even so it would reach a point where she slowly give up to you and her own desires, letting you get closer whenever she makes sure you two are alone and in a safe place and even trying to be her who gets close to you if you don't do it
Honeslty, 2B would be so troubled by all this situation that she will not even notice when she grow to start craving you presence and affection, is something she never had before, is not normal between the YoRHa units and with you she found how much she enjoys having someone who love her and someone to love, it makes her more happy than how she likes to admit
Genos
Genos has dedícate his life for quite a while just to get his revenge, he has now a new body made to fight and has being only thinking on trying to find the culprit of losing his home so it may be that you two end up together until he started being Saitama's disciple (and he supported your relasionship to be able to get more free time away from him)
Genos is kinda learning in the process about how to be a good boyfriend for you, he tends to think too much and is quite naive so he really takes his time to get used to be in a relasionship and has to actually take some time to think on the right way to show his love and care
Since the start Genos was a bit hesitant about physical affection, his body is made for combat and he is constantly needing repairs and upgrates (specially after becoming part of the heroes agency), he knows really well his body and how any kind of weapon or dangerous addition he have is only activated when he needs it, even so he wants to take as less risk as posible, after all hurting you even by accident would be something that will hurt him deply
He will end up avoiding physical contact if posible or even take a moment of hesitation before holding you since he needs to make sure he won't end up hurting you, and if you or someone else (probably Saitama) end up pointing out how diferent your bodies are or how rought and cold is his body because of being an android that is going to also make him feel incredibly nervous , its like he have ignored that fact for a while but now that he is aware of it it just makes have you feel self-councious (and sometimes reminds him how he used to be fully human once, wich only make him feel worst)
Genos will not admit out loud that the reason why he avoids physical affection is because how nervous and self-councious he feels about being an an android and how it makes him doubt his qualities as a boyfriend but if you put enough attention it becomes kinda obvious that it is because of that, he seems visibly down when he has to decline your affection because, deep down, he does want that hug, he wants to hold your hand or just caress you gently but he doesn't think it is a good idea
It will take some time and patience to make him feel comfortable enough for him to be openly affectionate, although it is actually quick to covince him that is fine, that he won't hurt you by something like holding hands, what will take him time is to stop hesitating so much before accepting the affection and even more to initiate it, but with enough patience and reasure he will actually become incredibly clingy and affectionate (he is not exactly the touchy type but if you are he won't mind much after getting comfortable, and once he is confident enough he will be quick to grap his arms around you to protect you even if he is just feeling jealous for any reason)
