Husband spent ten hours straight working today. He didn’t even stop to eat, I brought his breakfast and lunch to his desk. This easily would have been a 12 hour day if he was still commuting. I’m continually grateful he has been able to work from home during all this.
After an exceptionally mild summer, it is starting to heat up. It’s making the kids cranky and giving me headaches. I may ask husband to set up our little two foot swimming pool, even if there’s only a couple weeks of summer vacation left.
My uncle has offered to build an apartment for my grandma in the garage of the next home he buys. At first it seemed like a very practical and generous offer. But he’s between homes and living with his daughter and telling her that it will have to wait until after the pandemic.
Her kids flat out admitted they thought she was just complaining when she said she didn’t want to live alone anymore. This just seems like stalling her for longer. Two of his arguments are that I won’t be able to care for her properly since I have five kids, and that his option is cheaper so she will still have money for assisted living one day.
First of all, the argument that since I’m already a caretaker of 5, I couldn’t possibly help my grandmother is just patently false. My whole damn life is taking care of people. Second, if I’m so dang busy, then how come I’m literally the only one who could hear how serious she was about no longer living alone. And third, if he’s the better option, why is it that her ending up in assisted living is still a big part of the conversation? I don’t want her to ever end up in one of those places. The reality is she could live another 15-20 years. By then my uncle will be in his late 70’s but I’ll only be in fifties, potentially with a houseful of teenagers and young adults to pitch in.
I thought I was relieved that she had another good offer on the table. But she and I were both ready for her to move in next month. And listening to her wrestle with this, she sounds miserable. I love her and quite honestly I’m furious with her kids that they are willing to let her ride out this pandemic alone. Especially considering they each just came into an inheritance of $300,000 from their deceased deadbeat father who never gave my grandma a cent of child support to raise them (which she did singlehandedly). They could afford to take her in now, they just don’t want to. I’m willing to take her in, but they don’t want that either. They want her alone in that freaking retirement village, and it is strengthening my resolve to get her the eff out of there.
