#100daysofjournalfiction

Day 16/100 “Hello you, I woke up sad, angry, annoyed and every emotion in between. I have no desire to leave my bed and a paralyzing worry of what the house mother will think if I don’t. I’m panicked, trapped in this hell that is my mind. these demons haunt me, torture me, just make it stop, I just want it to stop…please. I thought I was better here, I thought these feelings, this emptiness, this fearfulness had gone. I will be a prisoner forever, a slave to this torment forever… Always yours, V.” #the100dayproject #100daysofjournalfiction

Day 15/100 “Hello you, It was so cold out today the house mother forbid us to leave. The children thought it a fun game that we were all piled into the great room, like sardines in a can. They built forts and played cards, took lazy naps. Eventually I pull out my water paints and painted per their request. Soon the room was filled with elephants and tress, monsters and hips, a flower and a pony. The house mother with her big feather hat was the last request for the evening before it was time for baths and bed. Always yours, V.” #the100dayproject #100daysofjournalfiction

Day 14/100 “Hello you, Its cold here, I anticipate that it will be snowing soon. The wind has a nasty bite to it, like shards of glass have been suspended in the air, I miss the cool mist of the docks and wish I could trade this razor sharp cold for it. Emit had to return to his camp last night and told me he would be there for several days without leave. I miss him already, I tried to sketch his picture today…I’ve embraced the fact that everything I create comes out abstract, however now I am concerned that it isn’t right as an abstract either, “don’t be a silly girl” I tell myself, there are far worse things to worry about in this world. Always yours, V.” #the100dayproject #100daysofjournalfiction

Day 13/100 “Hello you, Its been a few day, the children have been so busy with their studies and the weather has begun to turn cold. I have spent much of my free time with Emit. I don’t know how he gets so much time away from his station, but I’m grateful that he does. It’s nice to have a real friend again. He came to the orphanage today and played with the small children. I was so amazed at him, how he got down on the ground, played peek-a-boo and put all of his attention on their little needs. It was like watching a father with his children, nothing else seemed to matter to him in those moments. I smiled as I watched him and tried to picture him with his own kids. It warmed my heart and gave me hope that there still is unconditional love and kindness in this crazy world we live in, you just have to take a moment and look for it. Always yours, V.” #the100dayproject #100daysofjournalfiction

Day 12/100 “Hello you, Emit, his name is Emit. Today was beautiful and the children begged to go to the park, so my trouble makers and I went out to our park. he was there when we arrived. I sent the children to play and noticed he had planted himself on my usual bench. I signed as I sat down, I felt shy and awkward, like a silly school girl. I was actually nervous, but he was perfect gentleman, introduced himself and we talked, goodness how we talked. It was so effortless, like old friends catching up. He was from the states, stationed here in the army. We talked mostly about him and his unit, I have concluded they re the clowns of their group and wouldn’t have it any other way. We talked for so long the children and I almost missed dinner, the house mother will have a fit about this! Always yours, V.” #the100dayproject #100daysofjournalfiction

Day 11/100 “Hello you, he was in the park today, I did my best to keep my nose in my journal and not pay attention. There is something just so intriguing about him though, I would swear I know him but it is simply impossible for that to be true. He knew I was there and I am almost certain he knew I was trying to avoid his gaze. I did finally give in, a small wave and smile as I left the park this afternoon. He repeated the gesture, maybe this is where my adventure starts… Always yours, V.” #the100dayproject #100daysofjournalfiction

Day 10/100 “Hello you, I will admit I am content with a a schedule and a quiet existence, but ever since I saw him in the park that afternoon there has been this restlessness growing inside me. I keep spending my Sundays at this park both hoping to see him and trying to hide from him. I spend hours sketching those around me, I’m still not that good and they look a little abstract, but oh well. Adventure is pulling the strings of my soul, I can feel it but in all honesty I don’t now what to do or where I would even go. I guess for now my sketches will be my adventure. Always yours, V.” #the100dayproject #100daysofjournalfiction

Day 9/100 “Hello you, It was a gorgeous day today. I spent the afternoon at a park near the orphanage enjoin the warmth of the sun on my face. There were so many people out and about, I tried my hand at sketching a few on some scraps of paper I had, they weren’t very good, but the arts are so alive and inspiring here that one can’t help but to try it out. I turned my attention to people watching, a couple of men (maybe boys by their behavior) were on bike across the road. The one was short and so familiar. With a coy smile and mischievous eyes, he reminded me of the gentleman from the dock, the one who ultimately send me on this path. His eyes met mine and I quickly turn away embarrassed. “hey” he called at me “are you up for an adventure?” I’m sure my face turned pale at his words, but that story will have to wait. Always yours, V.” #the100dayproject #100daysofjournalfiction