#06032024

LENNON CADDEL DIDN'T HATE TENNIS. She hated playing tennis. Which was an entirely different thing. She loved tennis. She just hated playing. She hated how everyone's eyes were on her while she played. She hated the way her legs felt after a match where her opponent ran her up and down the court. She hated the way her shoulder and her knees and her back had started to hurt all the time. It was ruining her. Physically and mentally. For months she had been hiding things from her parents and her best friend. She had started hiding things from her physical therapist. "Does it hurt when I press here?" They would ask. And she would shake her head no, even if it did. She cried in the shower after every match, even if she had won. She liked crying in the shower because nobody could hear her over the rush of the water and, if she tried hard enough, she could convince herself that she wasn't crying. It was just the warmth of the shower running over face. The crushing weight of Tashi and her dad's disappointment if she quit was enough to make her stay. She felt like she just needed to tough it out. If she toughed it out for a year, maybe two, Tashi and her dad would let up a little. They would let her pick up an extra hobby without shaking their heads in disappointment and telling her she needs to practice more. She was talented, incredible even. She knew that. She had known that for years. But she felt like her career was starting to plateau before it even really took off. And though she would never admit it, she was ok with that. 

Patrick and Lennon didn't talk about tennis for the rest of the time they were out on the golf course. He felt terrible that he made he cry, truly. So in the three hours that they were sat shoulder to shoulder on the grass, he learned almost everything there is to know about Lennon Caddel. He asked her every question he could think of. Where she was from (San Diego), what her favorite color was (yellow), if she had any pets (one, a cat named June.) By the second hour, Lennon had all but forgotten their earlier conversation. She was throwing her head back in laughter when Patrick cracked a stupid joke and shoving him playfully when he poked fun at her. She found herself not wanting to back to her hotel and, by association, Tashi. It had been so long since she had had a conversation, a real genuine conversation, with someone who wasn't her best friend or her parents. She was learning a lot about Patrick, too. Every question he asked her, she threw right back. She wanted to know as much of him as she could. It was like if she didn't know everything about him, she would wake up from this dream of a moment.

It was 2 am by the time Tashi finally called her. Lennon was rolling on the ground, clutching her side, laughing so hard she couldn't breath, when she felt the pocket of her shorts vibrating. She knew who it was instantly. She sat up, desperately trying to catch her breath and wipe the tears in her eyes as she answered her call. 

"Hello?" Lennon spoke into the phone, smacking Patrick's arm as he tried to make her laugh again. 

"Where are you?" Lennon could hear the concern in her voice and she knew that no matter what she said next, Tashi would sway her to come back.

"Some golf course..." She bit her lip to contain another giggle and Patrick laughed out loud, which Tashi definitely heard. "I honestly don't know. Patrick brought me here and we've just been talking."

"Taking about what?" There was a sense of defensiveness in her tone, like she was offended that Lennon and Patrick wouldn't talk in front of her.

"Just tennis... and school." She lies. Tashi hums on the other end of the line and Lennon could feel the panic start to rise in her chest. "We were just about to head back." She glances at Patrick, his brow furrowed and a slight pout on his lips. Lennon mouths an 'I'm sorry.'

Tashi sighs. "That'd probably be best. We have to leave early in the morning, you know." Lennon could pratically see the way Tashi was sitting with her legs crossed, the phone sandwiched in between her ear and her shoulder, looking at her nails. 

Lennon nods, even though she can't see. "I know... We'll be back soon. Promise." 

That was a good enough answer for Tashi. So she says "Ok," and hangs up.

Lennon and Patrick were stood outside of her and Tashi's hotel room. She wasn't looking at him, subconsciously trying to avoid the disappointment she assumed was on his face. He wasn't disappointed in her, the opposite actually. He was grinning ear to ear. Their lack of time together making the time they were sharing all that more exciting. 

Patrick reaches up to brush a stray hair out of her face and she looks up at him. She's shocked by the smile on his face, but she smiles back. 

"When can I see you again?”

She blushes and looks away again. Patrick finds himself wanting to keep his hand on her face, to brush the pad of his thumb over the expanse of her cheek. He pulls back, albeit hesitantly, and smiles softly as she tries to find her answer. 

"I'm uh, moving to Stanford in a couple days. And then I have a few matches the first week I'm there. So I'll be pretty busy..."

He nods slowly, fiddling with his fingers. He opens his mouth to speak but she beats him to it.

"But I can make time for you! If you want to, um, y'know... stop by." Her hands are shaking, the confession that she wants to see him again almost embarrassing. 

He grins. "Yeah... yeah I'll come see you."

The door to the room swings open and Lennon and Patrick jump away. Tashi is standing in her pajamas, her arms crossed as she leans against the door frame. She eyes both Lennon and Patrick up and down, before locking eyes with the brunette boy. There's a sort of understanding between the two of them that Lennon picks up on. They're having an entire conversation with her eyes right in front of her, like she isn't even there.

"Are you coming in? It's so late." Tashi's voice snaps both Lennon and Patrick out of their daze. She nods and he backs away, but not before pressing a lingering kiss to her cheek. Lennon's face gets so red she almost looks sunburnt.

"Bye, Lennon. I'll see you soon, yeah?" 

She's stuttering, unable to form a proper sentence. He didn't even do anything crazy, she knows that. But her entire body feels like it's on fire. She jerkily nods her head before Tashi speaks for her. 

"Goodnight, Patrick." She grabs Lennon's arm and pulls her into their room, closing the door behind her. 

Lennon is facing the door. She can feel Tashi's presence looming behind her. She's unsure if she's mad at her. You would think after nineteen years of friendship, she would get easier to read. But alas. 

"Did you have fun?" 

Lennon lets out a breath she didn't know she was holding. She can hear the smile in Tashi's voice and she can't help but mirror it. She turns around slowly. She's still blushing and she's biting her lip to keep from smiling so big her cheeks hurt.

"He's so fucking cute, dude." She laughs, putting her face in her hands. Tashi sits on their shared bed, her chin in her hand as she watches. She's grinning. Lennon's happiness meant the world to her. Truly. She reaches her hand out, waiting for Lennon to take it. She does and steps closer.

Tashi looks up at her, both of them just staring at each other and giggling. "I can't wait to hear all about it tomorrow."

Lennon isn't tired. She could stay up all night talking about Patrick. But she lets Tashi pull her into bed. The sooner the morning comes, the sooner she gets to talk about him.

Patrick is resting his head on the cold wood of his hotel room. His eyes are closed and he's taking deep breaths, as if he's trying to come down from a high. Art is laying on his back on the bed behind him, smoking a cigarette. 

"How was it?"

Patrick whips his head around to face him and he rests his back against the door, tapping his own pack of cigarettes against the palm of his hand. "It was fun.. yeah. It was fine." His brows are furrowed as he goes to untie his shoes and Art raises his head to look directly at him.

"Did you guys talk about Stanford?"

Patrick shakes his head, biting on his lower lip. "No, no. She like..." He sighs and stands up fully before running a hand over his face. "She, like, started crying when I mentioned tennis."

Art's brows furrow, mirroring his friend. "What?" He laughs in disbelief.

The brunette shakes his head, dumbfounded. "Yeah I felt bad. Too bad to keep talking about tennis." He sheds his shirt and crawls into his bed. His hands are locked behind his head and he's staring up at the ceiling. "Did you talk to Tashi while I was gone?" He turns to look at Art, a smirk on his face. 

Art smiles before reaching across the bed and throwing a pillow at him. "Why?" He laughs, dodging Patrick's attempt to get him back. "You jealous?"