#0528

the world rotates by a string

it's walking the dog, now

keep sawing the line loose

no matter what happens

eat out of the palm

the vet is stopping by for a visit

in-home euthanization

wag your tail the whole time

without realizing that your body is

slowly falling asleep

listen to the wind whisper

aren't you so happy to be the mutt?

time zips by in canine years

the next time I open my eyes

i'll realize I'm dead

how long will I have been dead?

— ig.agustd reel

2020.05.28

TWICE 🎂 DAHYUN

HAPPY BIRTHDAY💕

look. sometimes you just gotta wear a cute hairpin, even if you don’t have hair.

When Handler announced that he was working on a Young Adult novel that was heavily sexual in nature, I was intrigued. On one hand, its risqué matter elevated the book on originality alone; on the other hand, delivering on that promise involved many ethical risks. Fortunately Handler had already proven to be rather competent at writing sex scenes, and downright excellent when it came to giving teenagers a voice.

The result confirms these impressions, and will no doubt give much food for thought when it comes to issues of sexual fluidity, fidelity, and consent. Although a poorly-worded blurb seems to imply that the book discusses rape, the topic is not explored, and the protagonists never seem to cross that moral horizon. What the book does, however, is present what consent means in theory to people who do not fully grasp what it means in practice, something to which teenagers might indeed relate.

The book centers on the sexual adventures of Cole, a red-blooded teenager with energy to spare. His many sexual experiences have filled him with an earnest confidence that leaves him incredibly naïve to anything erotic that does not directly involves sex — then again, Cole probably does not understand the difference between “erotic” and “sexual”. This cautionary tale takes on unexpectedly dour turns as fuck-puppets slowly evolve into actual characters, and as feelings (or lack thereof) get hurt. Nothing is more dangerous than thinking you’ve got it all figured out. Like most of Handler’s heroes, Cole leaves this story with more questions than answers. This amounts to one of the most emotional climaxes (ha!) Handler has ever crafted.

The work is a breath of fresh air for Handler after the more timidly-received “We Are Pirates”. Many readers were left nonplussed at Phil Needle’s ramblings. This time, Handler’s kept it short and sweet — or rather, short and salty. The story is structured around a myriad of unapologetically abrupt vignettes (the aforementioned “dirty parts”), each of them romantic, erotic or downright pornographic. Whether funny or heartbreaking, they cut right to the bone. This is a practical way for Handler to transcrive the inner monologues of a protagonist who does not fancy himself a writer: Cole is no Flannery Culp. He was not brought up on “The Marquise of O.”, but by the unending cum stream of YouPorn videos, and his writing reflects that. There are times, of course, when this narrative style borders on narrative facility. For the most part, it’s effective, and it does leave some room for poetry.

I read this book in one go. It can only be described as a roller-coaster ride: it will leave you thrilled, dizzy, hyper — and perhaps a tad nauseous. Sometimes the quickest fucks are the best.

Post-scriptum: