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and im fucked up
i know that i have problems of my own, but you were always there when i needed you the most. i spent a lot of time alone until you entered my life. suddenly i became aware of how much beauty i had inside of myself. something that you always made me see about myself. you didn’t care about the small details— “the bigger picture is something on dreamers can see.” you used to tell me that right before we closed our eyes and i know that we’ve strayed from those two young and reckless lovers. but i never learned how to let go of you. and in a way, i don’t think that i ever can. you were everything that i could’ve ever wanted— no matter how far we go in this life, that will always be my most truthful thought. in a world that has driven me insane, you were sane enough to keep me in check.
we used up every last drop of love and i find myself wondering if it was really just me that was doing all of the loving— why’d you have to do me like that? why’d you have to leave me all alone? vulnerable and closed off to anyone, but you. you’re my whole entire soul set on fire. you’re my broken hearted deep seated questions, but you held all of the answers. i’m left wondering if it was something that i did or said. i remember when you used to wake me up in the middle of night just so we could go take long night strolls— even if the sun came up and the hours felt so fucking short. i woke up everytime, just to see you. and now that you’re gone i realize that no matter how much we fall in love with someone, be careful dear heart of mine. sometimes even that can harm you.
i’m fucked up over this, you said that we would do things right this time around. i’m fucked up over this, you were the brightest thing when everything else made me depressed. where did all of the love go? was it all a scam? was any of it real? i know that we can’t keep people in our lives, but what did i ever do to hurt you? why did you have to say all of those words? that you’d never leave my side. why did you make all of those promises? why did you pull my pinky out of my grip, just to make sure that i saw the promises being made? why did you make me believe in you just to prove that it was all fake? i would rather have someone real enough to tell me the things that i can’t stand to hear than someone who just wants something for right now. i know that i wasn’t the best person to love, but why did you have to make me feel like i was the only one?
🐰
drawn in drawing desk for iOS (on sketch desk)
Have i ever told you the story of how i stole a baby goat from cannibal witches on a sabbath?
|Day 183|
Oddill

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Most Beloved Wrestler Tournament
#0183
Kyle O'Reilly
Orange Cassidy
0183 - Marill
The Aqua Mouse Pokemon
Water - Fairy
1' 4" - Around the height of a Koala.
18.7 lbs - Around the weight of a 4-Month-Old.
From the Johto region.
Equally male and female species.
Evolves from Azurill (0298), evolves into Azumarill (0184)
Info:
Marill's tail contained nutrients that have turned into an oil that is less dense than water, allowing it to act as a float for Marill when it dives under water.
Marill's fur repels water, allowing it to stay dry and swim faster in the water, and it also helps Marill stay warm.
Marill dive under the water to feed on plants growing on river bottoms, so don't be surprised if you see a blue orb floating in the water in a river or in the ocean, as Marill's tail is flexible and can stretch quite a ways.