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Day 734: tedious but rewarding work

kivarapattoni: Guard dog on duty. #maxinemaxinethejellybean

I don’t listen to The Antlers as much as I should anymore.  During my senior year in high school Hospice was one of the first pieces I reviewed for the school paper.  I can’t listen to many tracks of this album unless I have plans to lay in bed under the covers all day, contemplate life and cry.  To this day, this concept album still has a hold on me.  

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I am 29 years old and who am I in this time of my life? I am Soleil, a wife, sister, daughter, granddaughter, and mother of cats. Also, a pescatarian slowly converting to veganism, an animal advocate, a woman trying her darnest to be emphatetic and compassionate. A girl addicted to the fiction world whether it be in a book, manga, movie or korean drama form. A woman who dreams of a future with a cat island filled with happy and healthy cats. Someone who wants to love and be in a lot of adventures with her husband. Who can be depressed and broken by the world’s indifference to other earthlings. Who wants to finally get her butt off and work on her writing. I’ve been so many characters. Some fake. Some earnestly genuine. In my 29th year in this world, who do I want to be? What kind of person should I embody?