#*continue

I can’t be the only writer who has works that have so many notes and I’m just like ??????  This is one of my worst pieces?????  And then I have the ones I’m hella proud of that have literally not even a portion of the amount of notes.  This is one of the many reasons writers get discouraged.  When you feel so damn proud of a piece and it gets little to no attention.  And then the pieces that you literally think are shit are the ones that everyone loves.  This is my biggest problem with writing and why I’ve contemplated quitting so many times.  I want to love writing, and when I post a work that I think really deserves a lot of notes because, in my personal, biased opinion, it’s so fucking good.  And then a week later, it has a measly 50ish notes.  And then I post something that I write in an hour and I’m like this is shit, no one will like this.  And then an hour later it already has 200+ notes.  It’s frustrating and discouraging.  And I’m sorry if I sound entitled in any way, but it sucks so much spending so much time and effort into a piece that comes out a way you’re really proud of and then no one cares about it.  I don’t want any of you to think that I believe I deserve a lot more notes because that’s not what this is about.  This is not even just about me, this is about other talented writers, too.  I read so many amazing works by incredibly talented people and I see all the time the pieces that are the best get overlooked.  It really disheartens me to know that ‘quality content’ doesn’t seem to have as much importance anymore when it comes to fanfiction.  I’m not saying that the works with the most notes are ‘bad’, I’m simply saying (in my own opinion, so don’t come at me for this) that they are usually not as good.  Some of the best works on this site include OC’s, and how often do you see those works getting the attention they deserve?  Right, hardly ever.  People overlook them so often.  And this isn’t only about OC fics, this includes reader insert fics.  I have a couple reader insert fics that I’m so damn proud of that hardly anyone took the time to read because they weren’t paired with their favorite character, or because they didn’t like the genre it was under.  If you were to ask me what my favorite piece I’ve ever written was, I would say it’s Lauren.  I genuinely thought hard about the plot line and I really took the time to read it, re-read it, edit it multiple times, and it still only has 73 notes.  That is a piece I’ve loved for a really long time and I was so proud of myself when I posted it.  Her Favorite Genius is a piece that I literally just kind of threw at you guys - it went through no editing whatsoever and it literally posted it without thinking about it - and it has 691 notes.  I’m not saying I didn’t like that work, because I, myself, thought it was cute, but it just wasn’t the kind of quality that I usually aim for when I write and post.  It was very short and very mediocre, and yet, it has nearly ten times the amount of notes as the piece of work that literally has so much more depth and effort to it.  Do you see now where I’m coming from?  In no way am I saying I’m entitled to more notes, it just really sucks seeing this happen, not only to myself but to other writers, too.  This is the reason I can’t bring myself to write anything.  I don’t like just slapping down some words and calling it ‘good’ and posting it without really trying.  I like to put emotion and dedication into my work and unfortunately, when I do that, I just don’t seem to get as much recognition as I think I will.  I’ve been holding all this back for a really long time because I know I sound incredibly whiny and I feel stupid for even wanting to say it.  But this is the main - the real - reason I’ve been gone for as long as I have.  This is the reason I’ve been hiding and why I feel every day like I just want to stop posting altogether.

I really hope that everyone/anyone who reads this doesn’t take it the wrong way, as I really just needed to get this all off my chest.  I don’t know how long it will take me to come back or if I ever do, but I’m really sorry to disappoint anyone if I am/have.  That’s the last thing I ever want to do, because I cherrish all of you so much and I love doing this, but it’s just really hard to keep going due to everything I mentioned in this post.