Thinking about how Lucifer's rage when it came to Adam was not only because he was protecting Charlie but because Adam was the first person in forever that he could TOUCH.
All that rage is the rage he had for sinners. And it was finally all directed somewhere. Because normally he can't touch the sinners.
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The thing about Captain Ahab is that it is vital that he be aware he may die and it's vital that he be ready to die and it is vital that he maybe even expect to die, but above all else and despite any contradiction it is utterly, deeply, centrally vital that he has the unshakeable, dead genuine conviction that he can and will win
my issue with 'jason Todd leaves the batfam' is simply: he would never do that though. And that's the problem. You think he actually has enough self worth to do that? please be serious
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and FINALLY last simple concept, the heir, Sekerahk.
By necron standards, he's "young", given he was barely an adult by the time of the biotransference. Makes him prone to more emotional outbursts, being rash, and being a tad bit over zealous to mask his obvious inexperience.
More under the cut! (prepare for angst! 83)
Sekerahk was adopted into the family and rumors of his true parentage are many. Despite that, he was loved deeply by his adopted family.
His true parentage is known only to his adopted mother and father and Hecatax. There is rumors as to who his true lineage is. Some thing he is a mere commoner, others a noble. However, Hecatax has told nobles that admonish him that the blood that used to flow in Sekerahk's veins was ten times more prestigious than any they had. To Hassanarkh though, it matters little. Sekerahk is his son. End of story.
Neitheket and Hassanarkh were the only parents he ever knew and both were loving, attentive, and never made him feel any less than their biological children. To the Phareon and Phaerakh, he was their son, no questions to be asked.
They named him Sekerahk which in the Necrontyr language roughly translates to "Speak Loudly". Neitheket said it was to remind him to speak up as he was such a quiet baby that barely made a noise when he was upset.
He always stood out as an odd duck though, as he didn't look like either parent. Despite this, the fact he was adopted into the family was never a point of ridicule among his many adopted siblings.
His childhood was one that was good, despite the ever looming war and constant struggles. He was loved and he in turn did all he could to love and help take care of younger siblings who saw him as a devoted older brother.
Sekerahk at times wondered about his birth parents, but always afraid to ask. It was enough to know by Hassanarkh's word that his father had not abandoned him but had given him up in hopes he would escape the same cage he had been born into. That it was an act of love, not hate, that delivered Seterahk into Hassanarkh's home.
That was all Sekerahk has cared to know even millennium later, even if at times he doubts the words of his adopted father. He knows if he asks, Hassanarakh, the phaeron would tell him the truth....but a part of him is so scared to know. Sekerahk believes he knows the answer but doesn't want to have it confirmed. He has since decided he would rather live with the ignorance... but doesn't stop him from sometimes looking over lineage records.
Growing up, Sekerahk never had any pressure put on him to be anything and given the choice of what he liked to pursue. He was an artistic soul, but also wanted to be a warrior to keep up with the older siblings he admired.
Sekerahk studied poetry and literature extensively while also studying the art of war and training alongside his siblings. He was competent in training, but he was a soul that always hesitate when put in a serious fight.
Sekerahk was barely into adulthood, fresh-face and barely having experienced the world when the biotransference was decreed. He choose the process to stand with his father and older siblings unaware of the horror that became of the younger until much later.
During the wars that followed, he often was kept out of conflict and commanded the guard at the crown world and was frustrated by the fact he was left behind.
Eventually he would be called up to the rank of nemesor to lead his first command and prove himself a true necron warrior....and it was a tragic disaster. The carnage overwhelmed him. Fear clouded out all other thoughts. Why couldn't he hear the urging of the Silent King forcing him to fight? Why couldn't he move? Why did he stand there, unable to move? He didn't retreat, couldn't give the commands.
He would have died if not for his older brother, the last of Neitheket and Hassanrakh's children, stepped in to save him, sacrificing themselves to get Sekerahk safe.
Sekerahk was traumatized, not remembering anything of what happened. Only that he dragged a corpse all the way back to the camp, mumbling as if still talking to his deceased brother, mind broken from the whole event as he was convinced that his brother had been alive. Had to be alive. He wouldn't just die....!
The guilt of being the cause of his last sibling's death and the last true child of the phaeron and phaerakh, eats away at him still, despite both his parents assuring him it wasn't his fault. Tragedies happen.
The feelings of being a failure and wishing he had never been raised by Neitheket and Hassanrakh are strong inside him. It has crippled his self-worth to the point of him trying to act like how a proper "phaeron" should act and burying himself.
As heir apparent, the duties haven fallen heavy on his shoulders...even worse when he knows Hassanrakh probably doesn't see him as able to take on those duties. Hassanarakh has told Sekerahk that there is no shame on not taking the responsibility and to pass the mantle to another if they are more able to take on the duties of a phaeron.
Words meant to be gentle but instead only hurt Sekerahk's sense of having any worth left. He tries his best to train and overcome his habit of now freezing in a fight, suffering from serious PTSD from the whole affair.
He tends to put on an act to hide the crushing depression and PTSD he has, trying to appear strong, noble, and arrogant.
Sekerahk hates standing out though, not liking being singled out as "special".... but Hecatax tends to put him up on a pedestal and is always kind to him.
This had caused others to keep him at arms length, between his arrogant mask and the fact Hecatax torments others and is nice only to him. What he doesn't realize that Hecatax hates him entirely and is killing him with literal kindness as it hurts him more and isolates him.
Sekerahk doesn't ask for help, doesn't tell anyone about the bullying and emotional distress he is in. His inexperience in life, being young, makes him not sure how to handle such cruelties. Thus he is stuck with nothing but the hateful thoughts in his head wishing he was dead and his brother alive.
Sometimes he wishes whoever his father was had never conceived him and blighted Neitheket and Hassanrakh with him. Maybe his father was right to abandon him. Worthless. He was born with nothing good about him... the self-hate is strong in him.
The only necron he considers a friend now is Seidokyr, given the soothsayer always treats him with respect, even if excessively. At least it is someone who doesn't hate him....
At times, he tries to get back into writing and poetry, but then gets gripped by how much his work is probably stupid and no one will bother reading it anyways, and quickly abandons such things to focus on training.
He likes to do the coloring on other necrons and is very skilled with an airbrush. Very meticulous about keeping clean and loves to help others with washing up when given the chance.
When not putting on an act, his curiosity and more vibrant cheeky personality can come through at times, showing his age very clearly and how he is really just wanting friends, not yet old enough to really grasp how petty most necrons can be. Rather naive still despite everything.
Sekerahk is consumed with indecisiveness, self-hate, and just hangs on for the fact he doesn't want to cause Neitheket and Hassanrakh pain, knowing that despite everything, they would be hurt greatly by his passing.
But living hurts. This damned existence of immortality with all his memories hurts. All the good memories of a past that was perfect and how it all went up in flames. All Sekerahk is to have a moment of that past again.
