Something distinctly distressing and prideless about learning you’re a DID system—for us, at least
Thinking we were mixed origins at least gave us a little reason to celebrate our plurality, “it didn’t all come from bad! like a flower growing out of concrete anyway, maybe its base is rough but it’s still beautiful!”
Yeah, we deal with dissociation, but we thought that was unrelated. yeah, we have amnesia barriers that can be particularly distressing if it’d help if everyone could just have the information or if it let particular people access information that’d help them specifically, but it didn’t seem like it meant much.
I guess there’s still technically had in pride of being a system, pride in surviving, pride in whatever part of us still could be endogenic, but knowing you’re probably more traumagenic than anything, if anything else? Knowing there’s a world where we didn’t go through that and didn’t just turn out like this? ouch