Lord of Piss?
I bet you think yourself a funnyman. A real wise guy. The sort of fella whoâs read up on his Sassacre and the other great comedians of a bygone age. Or yâknow, youâre just some fella who is aware that, Lord is a class, and like it or not, Piss is an aspect. So chances are good the classpect fella has you covered.
Fortunately for you, I do have this covered! Letâs dive in.
First off, gotta clarify the two halves of this double-decker cake we call the Lord of Piss. A Lord is a vaguely defined class, and Piss as an aspect seems a bit sketch since honestly, what sort of guy gets Piss for an aspect? Clearly, you say, the Fedorafreak conclusion was simply a joke. And on one hand, you may be right. On the other hand Hussie is, in-universe, a fellow whoâs role seems to be more a chronicler whoâs log of events may or may not have some sort of impact in-universe. So we can reasonably say that his jokes are, as a Waste of Space, simply a guy messing with us using events happening elsewhere.Â
Starting a new paragraph to represent my first explanation: Piss! What is it? Seriously, what? Well, itâs the aspect of functions, processes, conversions, you get the idea. It is represented by the by-product of our own nourishment, the leftovers of a process. Players drawn to this aspect have a tendency to understand how to work things, the sort of folks whoâs main hobbies are picking up new hobbies without instruction just to teach themselves, the sort of fellows who NEVER read the instruction manual on an IKEA product. Pretty vague stuff to be said there though, since aspects themselves canât say TOO much about a person without say, Word Of Huss backing it up.
(Gentâs a deal of its own but that wasnât asked about so eh)
Lords, the class somewhat poorly represented by Caliborn, and yet all too well represented at the same time. The first thing to understand is that Lords are one of a few classes who understand their aspect pretty well from the start. To balance that out, theyâre pretty much clueless about everything besides what it IS. They come to learn their relationship to it, how it relates to the world, how to use it most effectively, and the fact that like it or not they must bend themselves to its whim, but itâs alright because the whims of a Lord are the whims of their Aspect. Not because of a creepy mind melding thing, to clarify, it just happens to be the case that a Lord who serves their aspects interests will usually find it serving theirs in turn.
So lets talk the Lord of Piss, shall we?
This guy (or girl I suppose but lets say guy for the sake of casual conversation.) is pretty big on processes, obviously. Maybe heâs into engineering, maybe heâs into biology, maybe heâs into both, heck maybe his dream is to combine engineering and biology in some strange living machine. Thatâs up to this fella. Point is, I could see this chap decking out his walls in diagrams if he wanted to be flamboyant, or maybe the dude just keeps it to a notebook. Flamboyance is a more likely possibility though. Lords are NOT exactly the sort to take well to being unnoticed generally. Power appeals to them, and be it that they take the Caliborn route of gaining power through elimination, or the more morally good route of making connections, they like to talk about themselves, show off, brag, often even tell you of their machinations as they progress. Sometimes even when the machination involves your own deceit. And if theyâre a decent Lord? Theyâll dupe you anyways. At the end of the day though, theyâre a clueless fellow when it comes to literally anything besides their plans and processes, their machines and machinations, etc. Maybe theyâre known as the ambitious yet naive one, or the one who gets on peopleâs nerves because he just doesnât Get It.Â
Once they start to progress is when things start getting interesting. Cause the Game, or Life Itself, is going to slap them in the face with a redwood at hurricane speeds cause reality is like that. The main obstacle between a Lord and their ambitions is a fundamental disconnect between themselves and reality. A belief that because they feel powerful, they are, usually. The game shows them otherwise. It frustrates them with quests that are CLEARLY rigged against them, CLEARLY designed to be more than they can do, and frankly impossible. The Lord of Piss in particular would be challenged most of all by the other aspects in their session: tasks thrust upon them relating to their own ineptitude in say, Breath, Heart, and other things. Why, theyâll wonder, would they do this? How is this good for them? And most importantly, how are they going to pull it off?
Itâs at about that point that theyâll pull it off.
Theyâll make one machine to solve an issue, and things will start to shift for them.
Theyâll play a role in anotherâs quest, knowing theyâre only doing it because the role must be played, and find themselves better able to find ways to fill roles in their own designs.
Theyâll find that in the end, the reason they were challenged to their breaking point was because they needed to realize that they could, in fact, do these things. That playing to their strengths could get them out of many a pitfall, so long as they took the time to understand not only that strength but how to play it. A Lord is a musical virtuoso who knows he could best an orchestra by themselves but refuses to play their instrument because they are content to know they can, and must be taught to play it not for any lack of skill, but a lack of respect for it. They will likely gloat about their talent, yes, but those who bear the gloating may not mind so much.
Especially since a Lord of Piss would be excellent in a leadership role, or at least a key supportive role. They know how to work the alchemy to its best extent, they know how to organize efficiently, they could probably work out a perpetual motion machine with 150% energy efficiency if they had to. A team working with or under a Lord of Piss would be nigh unstoppable, provided theyâre willing to allow such a proud fellow to aid them to begin with. Even on their own theyâre a boon to the session, as once they understand that their role is to be a part of the grand process we call existence, theyâre not too hard to get help from.Â
Powerwise? They have absolute command of Piss. I emphasize command because Lords really donât manifest or control their aspect in any way, rather simply bending it to their whims. They effectively have the raw power of a Page, but they can only use it to tell their aspect what to do.
I canât provide much help for writing them beyond what Iâve said. They will be proud people who rarely if ever Get It.















