Faith (Danny OâDonoghue- Oneshot)
A/N- I have no idea what this is, i was watching CSI: Miami & If i stay and it kinda just drabbled out and inspired this and i hope you all enjoy it.
P.S Would anyone like a part two? Because that's something i could arrange. Maybe like a flash forward?? let me know xx
Faith- noun; Complete trust or confidence in someone or something.
Faith Augustine Simmons was the youngest child and only daughter of Eric and Cassandra Simmons. She was bright and bubbly, wide-eyed optimistic twenty-four year old who most certainly was the definition of her own name. Being the youngest of five  children there was a lot of pressure put on her to continue the success that her older siblings had achieved in their schooling and careers and needless to say she didn't disappoint. At six years old she was gifted a violin, and although in her first few attempts she could barely make it sound tolerable she didn't give up. A perfectionist in her own right she mastered the violin by the time she was 14. As well as music she focused hard on studying and school and by the time she finished she had been elected president for the student body, announced as homecoming queen and valedictorian. She completed a scholarship at the San Francisco conservatory of music and shortly thereafter moved to London to pursue her dream of being in the London Philharmonic Orchestra. Â
On her third month of living in London Faith met Danny. They met in a studio where she had so kindly offered herself to record a violin part for an album of a band she had never heard of. Of course it was good pay and a great way to waste a Sunday, so how could she refuse? She took his eye straight away and he took hers. If you ask him about that day, he'd tell you of how beautiful she looked, how her brown hair flowed and sat right below her shoulders and how it reflected the light in a perfect kind of way, how she smiled timidly and it made his heart melt, how her laugh made his stomach do back flips and how even in her whitewash jeans and white t-shirt she still managed to take his breath away, if you ask him he'll tell you that's the day he learnt to believe in love at first sight. If you ask her about that day, she'll tell you of how his smug smile made her heart leap out of her chest, how his laugh gave her tingles down her spine, how perfect his hair looked even with when it was flat as a pancake with no product in it. How in all his track pants wearing glory he managed to be the best looking man in a room filled with guys in suits. How she fell in love that day and never fell out.
He used his flirtatious charm to get her number and a week later they were sat at a pizza bar drinking beer and laughing as if they had known each other for a lifetime. From that day for the next six months they texted back and forth all day every day, never running out of things to say to each other. Even when he was on the other side of the world and the time zones made it difficult they'd still find something to talk about for hours on end like describing to each other what the sunrise and sunset looked like in their respective parts of the world. Soon enough they were reunited and shortly thereafter he asked he to move in. Things got pretty serious, they talked about getting married, they even flew to the states to spend thanksgiving at home with her family and then to Dublin to spend Christmas with his. Things had been going fabulous, Faith continued to work her way towards her dreams and he continued writing song after song.
Then one day just when things couldn't be any better, tragedy struck. A car accident that would change their lives forever. She doesn't remember much of that day except for the numbness she felt inside her soul and the lack of air in her lungs when the phone call came through. She doesn't remember driving to the hospital or how she found her way to the level he was on, she doesn't remember his brothers carrying her down the hallway when the tears blurred her vision and her legs failed to work. She just remembers being numb, and the blank expressions that filled his family's face much like it filled hers. She remembers the doctors throwing around big words like paraplegic and paralysis and numbers like 10%.
When they finally allowed visitors to his room and when she finally plucked up enough courage, she fixed herself in the bathroom and then made her way to the room where he lay. He was pale and the machines were breathing for him, but he was still beautiful and she was still besotted with him. His fingers were seemingly the only part of his body not covered by a machine or wires. So she sat by his bedside for hours and hours, and simply held his hand. It was all she could think to do. Sit there, hold his hand and pray."We're going to start bringing him out slowly, but we're not sure what we're going to get or how long it will take for him to regain full consciousness, could be a few hours or a few days" Hours turned into days and days into weeks and when there was still no changes and everyone else had given up on him, she was still there with all her faith and hope. Her faith in him never faltered, not even for a second. No change meant no bad news, and where there was no bad news there was still hope, so she took what she could and held onto it hoping for the very best, never once thinking about the possibilities  that would shatter her world into a million pieces.
Everyone else envied her positive outlook towards the situation. But at the same time was worried that Faith was in denial about the whole situation. Her mother flew in a week after the accident to make sure she was still looking after herself. So one day when Danny's mum was sat with him, she took a short break from the hospital to shower and eat. When she returned she found his mother talking to him, even though he wasn't awake and couldn't reply, his mother talked to him as if he was. She talked to her son about all the sacrifices she's ever had to make as a parent, and how she wouldn't have changed a thing, and then she said something to Danny that took Faiths heart and ripped into into a million pieces.
"Of every sacrifice I've ever made Danny, this one son... This one's the hardest." Her breath hitched and the tears streamed. I want you to live son, it's what i wish for most in this world, i want you to put in the long yards and fight as hard as you can to stay here with me and your siblings and of course Faith... But with you maybe never being able to walk again, i know that might be really hard for you to cope with, so if you don't want to fight anymore, just know you could never be a disappointment, even though it's going to kill me, i'll be okay, we will all be okay eventually."
Faith left the room as quietly as she had entered and found herself curled up on the cubicle floor, for the first time since the accident thinking about the possibility that she may never get to see those green eyes opened ever again, or his sleeping face next to her in the mornings. She may never get another lazy Sunday wrapped up on the couch with her head tucked into the crook of his neck. She refused however to let the thoughts take over her anymore... she lay complete trust in god's greater plans and continued to have every faith that she'd get to spend the rest of her life doing all of the above mentioned things and more.
On the third day of the third week his eyelids fluttered and his hand twitched. It wasn't much but to her it was something. He began to respond to conversation and squeezing their hands when prompted, but still those eyes remained clothes. Until the fourth week when they just busted open. He took a minute to adjust to the light and to look at the people that surround him, his face covered with confusion and then just as fast as he had woken up his face had changed from confusion to distress. The reality of the lack of feeling below his waist hit him like a tonne of bricks. He shut everybody out, even Faith. That's what hurt her most, not  the accident or the fact that it had had taken away his ability to walk, but the fact that it had just taken him away as a person.
Still she prepared the house to be a more wheelchair friendly environment and after weeks of rehab home he came. But he wouldn't let her touch him, he wouldn't look at her, he'd giver her one worded answers instead of descriptive sentences like he used to. The Danny she had fallen for had been taken away, but still she had Faith that he would return, and even though they only gave him a 10% chance of ever using his legs again she would think about how 10% is still a chance, how it was still greater than 0 and that it was still something and better than nothing.
Then one day he finally broke. When she found him crying she didn't know whether to leave him to grieve for himself or to comfort him, so she did the only thing she knew how and once again found herself sat beside him holding his hand. They sat in silence for what seemed an eternity "Tell me why you're crying?" More silence followed for a few minutes with nothing but his sobs echoing around the room and then he spoke. "How can you - How can you stay and be so positive about this Faith, don't you see? I'm broken and there's a 90% chance i'm never walking again, don't tell me it's okay faith, it's not- this- this isn't OK"
"Because i love you. Because i want to go to sleep with you next to me every night, and wake up snuggled with you every morning. I want to go to bed with you on my mind every night. I can't think of a more perfect life. You complete me and I need you.. 10% sure might not be much Dan, but it's something. When the weatherman says there's a 10% chance of rain, i still take my umbrella because 10% is something. You weren't suppose to survive that crash, let alone wake up... Yet here you are. And i'm so fucking grateful, regardless of whether your legs work or not is irrelevant. I love you for whats in your heart and mind and soul, not the function of your legs. Life is this uncontrollable mess that we have no control over. I'm going to wake up tomorrow or i'm not, i'm going to get into the philharmonics or i'm not, it's going to rain tomorrow or it's not, You'll walk tomorrow or you won't. Some things don't have answers or resolutions, it's either going to happen or it won't.. so we can do two things.. we can either decide to live in this moment and love each other regardless of the situation we're in or  we can sit here and sulk about all the ways the wold has fucked us over... i don't know about you, but i'm not one for sulking, Dan."
That's the moment when he realised. Regardless of whether or not he ever felt anything in his legs or got to walk ever again wouldn't matter much. So long as he always felt that warmth in his heart and those butterflies in his stomach and got to see that spark in her eyes, that right there would be all the feelings he would ever need.
