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I am an only child.

If you grew up as an only child, you quite possibly:

My Dearest Harry,   Happy Birthday!!!! I’ve set an alarm for 8:30, and if you haven’t fire-called me by then I’m side alonging Rose over to scold you. Today took some serious planning, dear, and that boyfriend of yours will never forgive me if you show up late. Wear that green top- it brings out your eyes!   With love,   Hermione Granger-Weasley     Potter-  If you are late this afternoon I will fillet you alive.   Birthday Wishes.  -Draco (I love you. Wear the green top.)     Harry,   Happy 37th, Mate!!! Do us all a favor and get your old arse out of bed before 2, would you? ‘Mione and Draco have been working together, and you know how they get going. She’s in a right fuss, that one. I had to talk her out of sending you a howler this morning, and that was only by… Distracting her, so to speak. As I’m human and understand human emotions, needs, etc., (unlike our crazy robotic lovers), I’ve sent over a coffee and some chocolate frogs to make the ungodly time a little more bearable.  Cheers!  Ron  P.S. Hermione told me to tell you to wear the green top? I don’t give a flying fuck what you wear as long as you and Malfoy manage to keep the clothes firmly on this time.     Harry,   I had to hold mum down, she wanted to bring you breakfast in bed this morning. As much as she loves you, I’m not sure how she would have felt if she walked in on you having a lovely birthday shag with Malfoy against the coffee table. You’re welcome. See you tonight. And, for Merlin’s sake, try to be on time. In the green shirt, or Malfoy will send you straight back. Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  -Ginny P.s. Luna sends her regards and also asked me to tell you that green wards off the hucklefins.     Harry,   I had the strangest dream last night, Harry. I was being chased by a group of wrackspurts, all of them demanding I return their ‘treasure’. I was quite confused by their insistence that I had taken this ‘treasure’ (you know how I feel about stealing, it affects my aura), and I kept spraying lilac essence to ward them off, but to no avail. I asked Ginny if she thought it meant something, but she thinks I may have just had too much to drink last night. What do you think?   Oh yes dear, I almost forgot! Happy Birthday! I do hope you know to be on time, but I’ll try to distract him if you run late. I read last night about some very new potions research that could keep him talking for at least an hour.   Love you, dear.   Luna (Wear green.)     The boy who continues to live,   I’d say congratulations, but you’ve been complimented so many times for merely staying alive that it feels tacky at this point. Draco’s got himself all in knots over tonight’s events, and as much fun as it’s been watching him all flustered, I know that if you manage to screw this up I’ll be the one supplying his alcohol, so I feel I must warn you; If you wish to continue to be the boy who lived, show up on time, and properly dressed, if you can manage. Although, come to think of it, “The boy who fucked up one too many goddamn times” has a ring to it.  -Pansy Parkinson     Harry,   You have always been a son to me, dear. I know it goes without saying, but if I learned anything from the war, it’s that telling people what they mean to you is a privilege, and something we should do as often as we can. So, and I don’t mean to be sappy love, I know you have big plans for tonight, but I simply have to tell you how proud I am of the man you have become. Happy Birthday, dear. (I’ve sent over some breakfast, though Ginny suggested maybe I shouldn’t have. Terribly sorry if I’ve interrupted anything. Draco’s favorites are in there too, just in case.)  -Molly     Harry!  Happy Birthday, you geezer. The Amazon is great, as promised, if a little hot for my taste. I’m sorry to be missing your evening tonight- there truly isn’t anything for it. They want me back at the University this Thursday, and I’ve got very little besides a sunburn to show for my time out here. Personally, I think they’ve been a little outrageous with the timing; researching Amazonian werewolf roots and ancient cures isn’t exactly a picnic, you know.   Enough complaining. How’ve you been? How’s Draco? Have you finally bucked up and popped the question? I assume not; someone would have owled, I’m sure. You really ought to do it soon, Harry. If you don’t, he will, and you know how terribly dramatic he is. Just think on it. Send my love to Grandma, would you? I miss her terribly. Oh, and you can have some too, of course.   -Teddy Lupin     Uncle Harry,   I know you aren’t awake yet. You are never awake before noon. Which is why, in approximately 28 minutes, if you don’t firecall mum (which you won’t) to tell her you’re getting ready, (which you aren’t), I’m coming over there myself to talk some sense into you.   You do realize how important today is? Happy Birthday. I’ll see you in precisely 27 minutes.  -Rose Granger-Weasley Future Minister for Magic     Uncle Harry,  Please be awake when Rose gets to your place, she’s in a scary mood this morning. Happy Birthday, and best of luck, because Mum isn’t much better by the looks of it.   -Hugo     Harry  Happy Birthday. I know you are prone to sleeping in, but Draco has been particularly high-strung about this evening and I would really encourage your punctuality this once. I will, unfortunately, be quite busy this evening, but I look forward to seeing you soon. Tea at the manor Wednesday, perhaps? Talk to Draco and get back to me. Oh, and you do look so ever lovely in green. Regards,  Narcissa Malfoy