Hi, Iâm Bela (Martyr, Sainte, etc)! I go by any pronouns at all, including neos/zenos.
I canât currently donate to any Go Fund Meâs, Iâm sorry!! I donât get paid until the end of the month and a large portion of my money is going to getting my mother out of her shitty marriage, as she cannot currently work. I am happy to share your posts, though :)
Please be weary, my blog features nsfw and varied darker content, and so will not be safe for minors. If you are uncomfortable with sexual content, horror, gore, cannibalism, etc, please block me.
Your safety is a priority, but that responsibility falls onto you, not me.
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I will block any: Racists, Fascists, Homophobes, Transphobes, Sexists, bootlickers, pro-ICE, anti-intellectuals, any pro/anti discourse idc, and so forth.
Also, please excuse my spelling. Autocorrect is off and i suffer from migraines which impair my vision and reading.
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I wish i had something interesting to talk about bc my break is in 20 minutes and i need to like. Make the most of it.
And how better than to yapathon on here about bullshit
Maybe iâll yap about spiderwick bc i watched that last night. Love that film so much. Or iâll buy a dvd from the charity shop to watch on my office tv
Itâs recently been found that even hive insects rest. Bees will play with colorful toys. Ants sleep for about 1 minute but they do it so frequently it amounts to a few hours per day. Even trees take breaks.
The only things that work without rest are machines; literally everything that lives requires rest.
EVERYTHING THAT LIVES REQUIRES REST. STOP JUDGING YOURSELF FOR NOT BEING A ROBOT.
robots require very frequent breaks! welding machines generally have it programmed in that they canât run so long they melt themselves. ive overseen two different manufacturing robots now and each of them were fragile, finicky idiots that require constant maintenance and repair. they pause in between moves, in between jobs. youâre always keeping an eye on programming errors, on coolant levels, on heat. youâre always pulling bits of scrap out of joints, sweeping up debris, washing off nozzles and untangling hoses. and even then it snaps a chain and takes a whole morningâs vacation.
Itâs really hard to keep anything running âforeverâ. You can have things that run for years (even on batteries!) if they have some kind of extremely efficient sleep. Just like you! You need to sleep and sleep well or your signals get a bit frazzled
âThis kink is problematic when you think about itâ ohhhhhh shit ok lemme head on over to the kink store and trade these kinks in for one that make my jackoff fantasies morally superior
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My new office is very good for sitting in the dark like a supervillain and getting paid to watch tv /j
I do my job and love it but iâm unsupervised and itâs so tedious i could get away with not doing it ever. And people would just go âwow taking a long time huh? Glad its not me having to do itâ and not suspect a thing.
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So woke my sister was giving me her boyfriendâs old records but said he wouldnt let her give me one bc the singer is a rapist and he âdoesnt need the lectureâ
If i were to post a poll about which of my books youâd prefer for me to next read and do my â100-page reviewsâ about (or 200-page reviews for longer books), would you answer it?
I just⌠need a little guidance. I always decide what book to read next and change my mind
I find it so funny when person from [group] makes a comedic post about the things [group] is into and an asshole rbs it like âomg this is literally what people from [group] sound like!!â Like yeah. Person from [group] said it?
I find it so funny when person from [group] makes a comedic post about the things [group] is into and an asshole rbs it like âomg this is literally what people from [group] sound like!!â Like yeah. Person from [group] said it?
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Im 200 pages into Hannibal and Thomas Harris continues to make me incredibly uncomfortable when reading his books
The books are not ones i would recommend lightly, for sure. But i do love his prose so so deeply. Chapter 21 is written so beautifully. He is taking the reader by the hand and going âlet me show you somethingâ and is giving you a proper guided tour.
Its a lot more of a visceral moment to me than any of the violence has been because it is really intimate yet detached, less like an omnipotent god looking from overhead and more like Thomas Harris is an observer in the room itself whoâs recounting it to you in incredible detail. Especially since he writes Hannibal Lecterâs dialogue in a very similar manner to how he writes in prose.
My friend is currently reading Red Dragon and describes his writing as if he actually knows these people and is talking about them with the intimacy of a friend.
Tw for racism, csa, and gore.
Cw for me bitching.
I wish i could speak as kindly about the violence in this book, and its presentation of racial minorities. Had it been left at Mason Verger victimising black children, i could perhaps stomach it as a point on Mason going after the most vulnerable people he possibly can, using his age, social standing and race as means to be superior and hold power over another person. However as the book continues with less than favourable representations of people of colour, that dampens the implications of Masonâs behaviour because it becomes muddled in the authorâs overall brutalising of his non-white cast.
Pazziâs sacrificing of Rromani thieves without seemingly any willingness of the text to acknowledge the implications of this is very uncomfortable and prevalent as well. I can accept depiction â endorsement, and i can accept characters will, as a result, behave in ways that are unsavoury or bigoted. But i do not think itâs ever really expressed that the author understands that Pazzi is behaving with bigotry, or that the race of Romula and Gnocci do play a role in how interactions â such as pretending to pickpocket someone â might play out.
No, people will likely not assume a mother with a baby is a pickpocket, but that changes when said mother and baby are Rromani, especially in europe.
Even the non-racialised violence is incredibly uncomfortable, and though i do enjoy uncomfortable gore, there has to be some perception of purpose to it. A lot of the gore in this book so far just feels like itâs built to make you want to put the book down. I donât find that compelling. Which sucks because Thomas Harris has done very good, and does do very good in other parts of this book, when it comes to making you feel the real discomfort and threat of physical violence. But⌠nah. Hereâs a guy preparing a meal for pigs. Just animal meat, some fruit, a little bread. Written in a way to yuck you out but it doesnt contribute jack until the very end, and the horror doesnât come in human-shaped meat feasts, or anything really physical.
The same impact of that scene, bar the vomit induction, could have been achieved by them being fed anything. In fact i might find it more ominous if they were having a normal meal to the soundtrack of human screams. Yâknow the whole concept of forcing people to find familiarity in a scene of horror.
I just think⌠shock and horror are two different sensations to draw out of someone. And poorly-done shock can feel very very cheap. So far it has been feeling a little too cheap for my impossibly high standards.